Parents name proactive PC and fantastic friend as their CPA Heroes

A supportive police officer and a caring friend have been named CPA Heroes for going above and beyond to support parents in need.

We asked for nominations for the awards – which could be a professional the family had come into contact with or a friend, neighbour or colleague.

The only criteria was that the person had to have made a difference to someone who was experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, which impacts upwards of 3% of UK households but remains a fairly hidden form of domestic abuse.

The winners can now be revealed as PC Megan Smith from North Yorkshire Police Force and Kerry Smith from Darlington.

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS, said: “The idea behind the awards was to acknowledge the amazing people out there who are going above and beyond to support parents impacted by CPA. This could either be within a personal capacity as a neighbour, friend or family member, or as a professional who’d come into contact with that parent in the course of their work.

“The nominations were truly heart-warming and inspiring, and showed just how much of a difference having a ‘CPA Hero’ in their life can make to parents going through such an extremely difficult time.

“We are so thrilled to announce Megan and Kerry as our very first CPA Heroes. They’re extremely worthy winners, as their nominations show, and we hope they are incredibly proud of the difference they have made in the lives of those who nominated them.”

The parent who nominated PC Smith said: “Megan has been extremely supportive: after many months of fighting for support for my son, numerous meetings with professionals and extensive waiting lists, I was feeling completely let down. My mental health was affected and I could not see any light at the end of the tunnel.

“One night, the police were called due to one of my son’s violent meltdowns. Megan and her colleague attended, they took the time to speak to me, my son and also my daughter. There are then, Megan gave me her word she would try her utmost to get more support in place for me and my family.

“The proactive, supportive and empathetic approach she has shown is absolutely incredible and beyond words. Multi-agency meetings have taken place with urgency and I feel our worries as a family are finally being taken seriously with no judgement. PC Megan Smith is truly a CPA Hero!”

Assistant Chief Constable Mike Walker of North Yorkshire Police added: “We are delighted that Megan’s work has been recognised by PEGS.

“The awards provide an opportunity to shine a light on a side of police work that goes on behind the scenes, but is rarely seen in the public domain.

“Megan has demonstrated compassion, empathy and understanding of a difficult and sensitive situation and ensured the family got the positive help they needed. She is a credit to North Yorkshire Police.”

And the parent who nominated Kerry Smith said she had ‘been there throughout the whole time that our family has been surviving CPA’ including late-night phone calls, helping them to move house, and helping tidy up after property had been damaged in the home by her friend’s son.

“She’s never judged, always supported, and I don’t know what I’d have done without her. She was amazing, calm and strong when I wasn’t. I will never ever be able to thank her for the things she’s knowingly and unknowingly done for us.

“She’s truly inspirational, kind and selfless. No judgement has been made and I know she’ll be there to support us as we rebuild some kind of life.”

Huge congratulations to both winners!

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August Spotlight: Verbal Abuse

By PEGS Admin • August 19, 2025

When Words Hurt – Facing Verbal Abuse from Your Child There are few things more emotionally painful than hearing cruel, dismissive or demeaning words from your own child. Whether they’re still under your roof or are well into adulthood, being spoken to in a verbally abusive way by the very person you raised with love and care can leave parents feeling confused, heartbroken and alone. It's not something we often talk about openly. Parents may fear being judged or blamed or they may question whether their experience is even valid. But verbal abuse from a child whether they’re 14 or 40 - is real and it matters. If you’ve found yourself on the receiving end of shouting, insults, blame or emotional manipulation from your child, this space is for you. You are not alone. Verbal abuse can take many forms and not all of them are loud or obvious. Some common examples include: Repeated criticism or personal attacks Name-calling, sarcasm or mockery Shouting or aggressive tone Gaslighting or manipulation (“You’re imagining it” / “You always make it about you”) Blame-shifting and emotional guilt trips Intimidating silence or threats These behaviours, especially when ongoing, can leave emotional bruises that are hard to explain to others or even to ourselves. For many parents, the verbal abuse doesn’t start all at once. It might begin as eye-rolling, snide remarks or even sudden mood swings. But over time, those moments become more frequent, more intense, more targeted. The home no longer feels like a place of peace. Interactions start to feel unsafe. “She speaks to me like I’m her enemy. I raised her with love, but now I feel like nothing I do is ever right in her eyes” -Mum to a 17-year-old daughter “I dread phone calls from my adult son. He rings only to shout and unload on me. I hang up shaking every single time” -Dad of a 33-year-old son “My teenager calls me names I wouldn't repeat in front of anyone. It’s like living with someone who hates me,I feel ashamed saying that” - Parent of a 15-year-old “I never thought I’d have to protect myself emotionally from my own child. But here I am trying to keep my boundaries and stay sane” - Mum to a 28-year-old daughter These words reflect a growing reality for many families... a reality that often gets hidden behind closed doors. When verbal abuse comes from a stranger it’s unpleasant. When it comes from your own child , the one you’ve fed, cared for, worried over, and loved unconditionally - it can feel like a betrayal. Parents often experience a mix of emotions: Shock and disbelief – “How did it get to this?” Shame – “Am I the only one dealing with this?” Guilt – “What did I do wrong?” Fear or anxiety – Dreading the next conversation or interaction Loneliness – Feeling unable to share the experience without judgement You may also feel torn between wanting to keep the connection and needing to protect your emotional wellbeing. It’s often assumed that once children reach adulthood, their relationship with their parents will naturally shift into one of mutual respect. But this isn’t always the case. Some adult children continue (or begin) to speak to their parents in ways that are controlling, hurtful or emotionally volatile. These interactions may be laced with some kind of resentment, blame for past decisions or expectations of endless emotional or financial support. In these situations, many parents struggle with a sense of powerlessness. After all, you can’t “ground” a 30-year-old. But your emotional safety still matters and it’s okay to acknowledge when something isn’t right. You can love your child deeply and still feel the pain of being treated unkindly. You can want healing and still need space. You can seek support without shame. Even in the face of verbal abuse, your worth as a parent does not diminish. You are still deserving of respect, of peace and of a life where you’re not walking on eggshells in your own home or heart. If your child is speaking to you in ways that hurt. If you feel exhausted, blamed or disrespected, you are not overreacting. If you find yourself dreading their calls or presence, you are not alone. You can love your child and still take care of yourself. You are worthy of respect. You are allowed to feel safe. And you are not alone.