In the age of technology, digital tools have become a central part of our daily lives. However, for some families, these tools are misused as instruments of control and harm. Digital abuse, a form of technology-facilitated abuse, is increasingly being seen in cases of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), where children or teenagers use technology to intimidate, manipulate, or exert power over their parents or caregivers. While often overlooked, this emerging issue has significant implications for families and requires urgent attention.

In 2022, almost 30% of parental figures who had completed one of PEGS yearly surveys had shared how they were being abused via the use of technology. Behaviours can often include:

• Constant Monitoring: Demanding access to a parent’s phone, emails, or social media accounts, or tracking their location via GPS.
• Threats via Technology: Sending abusive messages or threatening to share sensitive or embarrassing information online.
• Hacking and Control: Gaining unauthorized access to a parent’s accounts, devices, or financial information to manipulate or restrict their actions.
• Cyberbullying: Using digital platforms to humiliate, intimidate, or demean parents publicly or privately.
• Doxing – Using various ways to search for and publish private or identifying information about a parental figure on the internet.

CPA is already a challenging issue to address, and the addition of digital abuse creates further complexity. Technology provides children with tools to maintain control over their parents even when physical proximity is limited. For many parents, the abuse is compounded by

feelings of shame, isolation, and confusion about how to handle behaviour that defies traditional parent-child roles. The impact of digital abuse on parents can be profound. Constant monitoring or harassment via technology leaves parents feeling trapped and powerless in their own homes. The loss of privacy, coupled with the emotional strain of managing an abusive relationship with their child, can lead to

anxiety, depression, and social withdrawal. For many, the experience is compounded by a lack of understanding or support from others who may dismiss or misunderstand CPA.

Parents and caregivers experiencing digital abuse often face unique challenges in recognising and addressing the

behaviour. Some warning signs include:

• A child demanding access to devices or accounts and becoming aggressive if denied.
• Excessive messaging or calls, particularly with controlling or abusive language.
• Threats to post private information or publicly humiliate the parent online.
• Unauthorized purchases or changes to financial or personal accounts made by the child.

Steps to Address Digital Abuse in CPA

If you’re a parent facing digital abuse from your child, there are steps you can take to protect yourself and begin addressing the situation:

1. Secure Your Digital Presence: Update all passwords, enable two-factor authentication, and consider using apps to monitor and manage access to devices and accounts.
2. Document the Abuse: Keep a record of abusive messages or activity as evidence, which may be necessary for legal or therapeutic interventions.
3. Seek Professional Support: Organizations specializing in CPA, like PEGS, can provide guidance, workshops, and one-to-one support to help you navigate these challenges.
4. Set Boundaries: With professional help, work toward establishing and enforcing digital boundaries within your household.
5. Understand Legal Protections: Familiarize yourself with local laws regarding cyber harassment and unauthorized access to ensure you know your rights.

Digital abuse in the context of Child to Parent Abuse is a growing issue that needs greater societal awareness and systemic support. By addressing it head-on, we can empower parents and caregivers to take back control and work toward healthier relationships with their children. Organisations like PEGS are leading the way in providing free, accessible support to parental figures facing CPA. Through advocacy, education, and direct intervention, we help families navigate these challenging dynamics while fostering long-term change. Technology should be a tool for connection and empowerment, not a weapon of control. By shining a light on this hidden form of abuse, we can take meaningful steps toward safer and healthier home environments.