When I first started working in the violence against women and girl's sector over two decades ago, technology rarely featured in conversations about domestic abuse. Today, it is impossible to separate the two.

I currently work as Head of Technology‑Facilitated Abuse and Economic Empowerment at Refuge, where I lead the national work responding to the growing ways perpetrators misuse technology to monitor, harass, control and intimidate survivors. My role sits at the intersection of frontline service delivery, digital safety, policy reform and survivor advocacy — a space that did not really exist when I began my career, but one that has become essential as abuse increasingly moves online.

Seeing the shift first‑hand

My background is firmly rooted in frontline domestic abuse work. I began my career supporting survivors in community and statutory settings, coordinating high‑risk cases and working with families experiencing profound harm. As technology became more embedded in everyday life, survivors began disclosing new forms of abuse: phones being monitored, locations tracked, finances controlled through online accounts, intimate images being threatened or shared.

What became clear very quickly was that technology‑facilitated abuse rarely exists on its own. It is part of a wider pattern of coercive control — another tool used by perpetrators to maintain power. Survivors were often being told to “just turn off their phone” or “leave social media”, advice that ignored the reality that technology is essential for work, parenting, safety and connection.

At Refuge, I joined the organisation as technology abuse was starting to be recognised as a serious and systemic issue. Since then, I have helped to build and lead a specialist team that supports survivors to regain control of their digital lives, alongside their physical, emotional and economic safety. 

Building responses that centre survivors

A core focus of my work has been ensuring that responses to tech-facilitated abuse are survivor‑centred, practical and realistic. That means designing safety planning that works in real life — not asking survivors to disengage from technology but supporting them to use it more safely.

This has included developing national resources, digital tools and training for frontline practitioners; working with financial institutions and technology companies to improve safety‑by‑design; and influencing policy and legislation so that technology‑facilitated abuse is recognised as part of domestic abuse, not a niche issue.

Alongside this, my role encompasses economic abuse — an area deeply intertwined with technology. Online banking, credit, benefits systems and digital systems can all be manipulated by perpetrators, leaving survivors financially trapped long after a relationship has ended. Supporting survivors to rebuild economic independence is critical to long‑term safety, and it is an area that requires systems‑level change as well as individual support.

From practice to policy and research

Over time, my work has expanded into national policy and research. I have contributed to legislative reform on issues such as image‑based abuse and online safety, drawing directly on survivor experiences to highlight where systems fall short. I am also a researcher and PhD candidate, exploring how technology‑facilitated abuse features within domestic homicide reviews, and what this means for prevention and early intervention. 

Internationally, I have had the opportunity to examine how other countries respond to tech abuse and digital harm, bringing learning back to inform UK practice. Throughout this work, one principle remains constant: survivors are the experts in their own lives, and effective responses must be shaped by their voices.

Why this work matters now more than ever

Technology is evolving rapidly. We are seeing increasing use of hidden surveillance, smart devices, financial technologies and AI‑enabled harms such as deepfake imagery. At the same time, services are stretched, and survivors often face disbelief or minimisation when abuse does not fit outdated understandings of domestic abuse.

That is why this work matters. Technology itself is not the problem — the perpetrators misuse of technology is. But without informed, specialist responses, technology can amplify harm. My role, and the work of many colleagues across the sector, is about ensuring that safety, dignity and autonomy are embedded into the digital world, just as they must be in the physical one.

I am proud to work alongside survivors, practitioners, policymakers and partners who are committed to adapting our responses as abuse changes shape. Ending domestic abuse in a digital age requires curiosity, collaboration and courage — and above all, a refusal to leave survivors behind as the world moves on.

If you’d like to learn more about Refuge’s work on technology‑facilitated abuse or explore partnership opportunities, you can find further resources at www.refugetechsafety.org 

Emma Pickering

Head of Technology-Facilitated Abuse and Economic Empowerment/National Domestic Abuse Helpline