PEGS Blog

Service Shoutout: Chapter One

Thu, 23 Apr 2026 09:56:05 GMT

Service Shoutout: Chapter One

Gambling can impact every area of life, including mental and physical health, finances, relationships, education and work - even impacting those within the wider family. Gambling products are often designed to keep people engaged, the industry invests significantly in advertising that can normalise gambling and downplay risk. For parents and carers we support at PEGS, this wider context matters.

We know that Child to Parent Abuse is complex and multi-causal - for many of PEGS’ parents, our 2025 report found that 82% experienced financial controlling behaviours. Where gambling is also present, this can create an additional and significant barrier for families trying to reach out for support.

What remains essential is that families are not met with blame, and instead understanding.

Chapter One is a UK organisation focused on reducing gambling harm by improving understanding, increasing access to support, and strengthening professional awareness. They provide clear, accessible information and guidance for individuals and families impacted by gambling, alongside training for frontline professionals and practical resources that help signpost people to appropriate support services. Their work also highlights how gambling harm can be influenced by the design of gambling products, and helps to make support easier to find, more visible, and more accessible for those who need it.

Alongside this, Chapter One provides support both for individuals experiencing gambling harm themselves and those who may know someone who is. Their website includes practical tools, reflective exercises, and guidance resources, including the Preparing for Change worksheet, which is designed to help you understand your motivations, what support you have to help you and how you might go about making changes related to gambling. It can also help you plan and prepare to make life changes. This can help you understand your motivations, what support you have and how you might go about making changes related to gambling.

We continue to advocate for responses that see the full picture of family life. Because when we understand context, we are better able to support meaningful change.

Whether it is CPA, gambling-related harm or experiences occurring within the home, families deserve to be met with understanding, not assumptions. And that there is support available.

If you would like to find out more about Chapter one, please do by clicking here.

You are not alone.

National Stalking Awareness Week: What We See at PEGS

Mon, 20 Apr 2026 10:12:19 GMT

National Stalking Awareness Week: What We See at PEGS

Trigger warning: This blog mentions stalking and harassment. Please take care as you read and pause if you need to.

During National Stalking Awareness Week, there is often more space to talk about stalking in relationships or by strangers. But what is still far less understood and far less spoken about, is how these behaviours can exist within families.

Here at PEGS, we hear from many parents, carers and guardians who are feeling watched, controlled and unsafe in their own homes. These experiences don’t always fit people’s expectations of what abusive behaviours “should” look like, and that alone can make them even harder to recognise.

For some parents, carers and guardians, it can begin with what may seem like constant questioning…

“Where are you going?”

“Why are you going there?”

“Who are you with?”

Or persistent messages that feel difficult to step away from.

But when we look more closely at what many families are experiencing, it is often far more complex than this.

At PEGS, we hear how digital abuse can play a significant role in stalking and harassment within CPA. Parents describe phones being tracked or interfered with and messages becoming more frequent and persistent. Social media is also something many families speak about. We have heard experiences of fake profiles being created to monitor activity, maintain contact, or continue patterns of control.

Over time, these behaviours can build, leaving parents feeling watched, overwhelmed and unsure how to create space for themselves in their own home.

If this feels familiar, you are not alone.

These behaviours are not always recognised as stalking or harassment when they happen within a parent - child relationship. But for the parents experiencing them, the impact can be deeply impactful. What makes this even more complex is the emotional landscape parents are navigating at the same time.

In our recent survey, 29% of parental figures told us they were being tracked by their child. For many, this is not a one off incident and the true number will not be known.

Many parents tell us that one of the hardest barriers to reaching out is the fear of not being believed. There can be worry about being judged, or about what might happen to their child if they speak openly. Some have already tried to share their experiences, only to have them minimised or misunderstood.

If you are reading this and recognising parts of your own experience, you don’t need to have all the answers today and that there is support available. There are many fantastic organisations who can support you if you feel you need support:

Paladin National Stalking Advocacy Service works with people experiencing stalking to help them understand risk and explore options for staying safe.

You can visit their website by clicking here.

Suzy Lamplugh Trust provides resources and runs the National Stalking Helpline, offering advice and support to those affected.

Suzy Lamplugh Trust defines stalking as 'A pattern of fixated and obsessive behaviour which is repeated, persistent, intrusive and causes fear of violence or engenders alarm and distress in the victim.’

If this is something you are experiencing, you can contact the National Stalking Helpline for advice and support on 0808 802 0300 or visit their website by clicking here.

The helpline offers:

practical information
support and advice on risk
safety planning and legislation

Please remember, you are not alone - PEGS is here to support you every step of the way, for as much as you need.

PEGS Is Growing - We Need Passionate Volunteers!

Mon, 13 Apr 2026 09:51:16 GMT

PEGS Is Growing - We Need Passionate Volunteers!

At PEGS, everything we do begins with lived experience. We’re a team built by people who understand Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) not just in theory, but in reality - and we’re committed to changing how CPA is understood and addressed across the UK.

Every day, parents and carers reach out to us feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and unsure where to turn. And every day, we do everything we can to make sure they feel heard, supported, and never alone. But as demand grows, so does our need for compassionate people willing to step forward. That’s why we’re building a new team of Volunteer Service Advisors, and you might be exactly who we’re looking for.

Why This Role Matters:

When a parent reaches out to PEGS, they’re often at one of the most difficult points in their life. They’ve taken a brave step in asking for help. What they need next is reassurance, clarity, and connection. That’s where our Volunteer Service Advisors come in.

You’ll be supporting our Parent Practitioners by contacting parents and carers who have been referred into our service. Your role is simple but powerful:

updating them on the progress of their referral
helping them understand the support PEGS can offer
being a calm, friendly voice at a time when they need it most
This early contact helps families feel grounded and supported
practitioner-led sessions, workshops, or 11 support. It strengthens our service and helps us reach more families than ever before.

What the Role Looks Like Day to Day:

This is an office based role at our Shrewsbury headquarters, working alongside our team during normal operating hours. You’ll be part of a rota with other volunteers, and you’ll always have support around you.

Your tasks may include:

responding to parents and professionals by phone, text, or email keeping accurate records
raising safeguarding concerns with the DSLs or Volunteer Programme Lead
contributing feedback or testimonials for project reporting
attending meetings, training, and supervision sessions
helping with general admin that keeps our service running smoothly

You don’t need to know everything on day one. You just need to bring empathy, reliability, and a willingness to learn. We’ll teach you the rest.

Skills That Help You Thrive:

You’ll be a great fit if you:

communicate clearly and compassionately
are comfortable using a phone, email, and basic computer tools
can work independently but also enjoy being part of a team
are organised and confident with admin tasks
are open to learning new systems and approaches
Experience in domestic abuse, safeguarding, or support services is helpful but absolutely not essential. What matters most is your heart and your commitment.

Training, Support, and Equipment - We’ve Got You

Every volunteer receives:

full mandatory training
ongoing development opportunities
regular supervision and support
the equipment needed to carry out the role (laptop and phone)
coverage under PEGS insurance

You’ll never be expected to do anything you’re not trained or confident to do. We’re here to support you just as much as you support the families we work with.

Be Part of Something That Truly Matters...

Volunteering at PEGS isn’t just about giving your time, it’s about being part of a movement. A movement that believes no parent or carer should feel alone. A movement that’s reshaping how CPA is understood across the UK. A movement built on empathy, authenticity, and lived experience.

If you’re passionate about making a difference and want to join a supportive, forward thinking team, we would love to hear from you.

Your voice, your time, your compassion they could change someone’s life.

Interested in joining #TeamPEGS?

Are you interested in joining #TeamPEGS?

Find out more by clicking here !

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Service Manager

Wed, 08 Apr 2026 11:00:32 GMT

A Day in the Life of a Service Manager at PEGS

At PEGS, every team member plays a vital role in supporting parents and families, but behind the scenes, there’s a whole network of care and coordination that keeps everything running smoothly. As a Service Manager, my day is all about supporting our team with particular emphasis on our child-to-parent abuse practitioners so they can do their best work with the parental figures who rely on us.

One of the most important parts of my role is ensuring our practitioners are supported both professionally and emotionally. We hold regular reflexive supervision sessions, where we take the time to discuss and unpick the parents on their caseloads. These sessions aren’t just about making sure parents get the best possible support, they’re also about looking after our practitioners.

Working with families facing challenging dynamics can be emotionally taxing, and I’m acutely aware of the risks of vicarious trauma to the team. My goal is to create a safe space where practitioners can reflect, process, and recharge, so they feel equipped and confident to continue their important work.

Supporting the team also comes in more practical forms. This can mean covering the admin inbox, answering queries from parents or professionals, or stepping in to cover practitioner-led sessions when needed. I regularly meet with other professionals and services to ensure our parents receive the seamless, coordinated support they deserve and to keep up to date with happenings in the sector.

A large part of my role also involves supporting our director to prepare reports for our funders. These reports highlight the incredible work the team is doing, showcasing our impact and helping to secure the resources we need to continue supporting parents effectively into the future.

Keeping parents engaged and informed is another important aspect of my day. Together with the team, I create our parent newsletter, which shares updates, advice, and resources in a friendly, accessible way. It’s a small but meaningful way to strengthen our connection with the families we work with.

Of course, there are also the more traditional aspects of managing a service. I coordinate the practitioner led sessions rota, handle team-related administrative tasks, work on training and recruitment, and hold team meetings. While these tasks may seem routine, they are essential for keeping our service organized, efficient, and effective.

At the heart of my work as a Service Manager is the people supporting them, listening to them, and helping them thrive in their roles. This is the aspect of the role that I enjoy the most - I’ve always worked in roles supporting people but I really enjoy taking a broader approach to this by working with my own team who then deliver the direct support to parents.

Every day brings a mix of challenges and rewards, from ensuring our practitioners are supported, to keeping the service running smoothly, to celebrating the wins of the parents we work with. It’s a role that’s as varied as it is rewarding, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Support for Armed Forces community experiencing Child to Parent Abuse

Tue, 07 Apr 2026 09:42:53 GMT

Armed Forces families impacted by Child to Parent Abuse are set to receive specialist support from PEGS

PEGS has been awarded a grant to cover the 12-month project as part of the Hidden Voices programme run by the Armed Forces Covenant Fund Trust.

The funding will be used to provide trauma-informed group support, creative workshops and peer connection opportunities for parents, as well as participants collectively developing awareness and wellbeing resources, culminating in an exhibition to raise awareness of this hidden issue, which sees parents and carers experiencing physical, verbal, digital or financial abuse or coercive control.

The project will see a new post for PEGS with the project lead being a veteran or someone with extensive experience of working with both serving members and veteran communities. They will deliver sessions online to ensure accessibility for Armed Forces families, and will introduce a specific weekly 'Naffi and Natter' group to provide peer support and connection. The lead will also work in conjunction with The VC Gallery, a charity which focuses on creativity to support wellbeing among veterans and the wider community, who will lead on art, photography and writing workshops to help participants process experiences and build confidence.

According to Forces Employment, there are around 125,000 military children in the UK with researchers estimating one in ten families are impacted by Child to Parent Abuse (which also occurs after children have turned 18), which means there are many thousands of Armed Forces personnel dealing with this often-hidden issue.

PEGS Founding Director Michelle John said:

“We have supported thousands of parents affected by this form of abuse and regularly hear from serving and veteran families seeking support from an organisation which understands the specifics of their situation. Many sadly report avoiding support altogether, despite high levels of stress, anxiety and isolation. “When we designed the project in consultation with these parents, they highlighted the need for online delivery due to postings, childcare responsibilities and geographic isolation. They requested a balance of talking-based and creative sessions, informal spaces that reduce stigma, and practical guidance tailored specifically to armed forces life. Participants also expressed a strong desire to be involved in shaping any resources produced, rather than being passive recipients.”

Barry John, Founder of The VC Gallery, added:

“This innovative, creative programme designed by PEGS offers a new and vital approach to supporting members of the Armed Forces community, particularly in area where domestic support is needed most. We are incredibly grateful to PEGS for inviting The VC Gallery to facilitate the arts within this important initiative, and to the Armed Forces Covenant Fund Trust for their continued commitment to supporting Armed Forces personnel, veterans, and their families across the UK.”

Service Shoutout: A Better Tomorrow

Fri, 27 Mar 2026 15:34:52 GMT

Service Shoutout: A Better Tomorrow

The team at PEGS believe that no one should journey through hardship alone. Many families experience complex, intersecting challenges like addiction, homelessness, mental health struggles and domestic abuse. That’s why we are delighted to spotlight A Better Tomorrow Charity – Support for recovery, housing & domestic abuse , an organisation doing truly impactful work in our region.

A Better Tomorrow is a peer‑led charity based in Telford and Wrekin that provides supported accommodation and tailored programmes for people who have experienced addiction, mental health challenges, homelessness, or domestic abuse. Their approach combines practical support with understanding, dignity, and lived experience insight which all goes toward helping people not only survive but move toward stability, confidence and belonging.

What stood out to us most from the recent launch event our team attended was the genuine warmth and collaborative spirit that filled the event. It was inspiring to see people come together in a collective commitment to change. For PEGS and our team, it was an incredibly motivating day.

While PEGS focuses specifically on supporting parental figures experiencing CPA, the needs families encounter are often interconnected and misunderstood by many:

People may be struggling with abuse, coercion, or complex behaviours in ways that overlap with addiction or mental health difficulties.
Safe, stable housing can be a foundational step toward recovery and emotional wellbeing.
Early intervention and compassionate support help prevent crises from escalating.
A Better Tomorrow provides safe housing, recovery support, mental health programmes, and pathways out of homelessness or abusive situations - building the kind of stability many families need alongside the emotional support PEGS offers.

We were struck by how much our organisations align in spirit:

Dignity and respect for every individual
Trauma‑informed support that meets people where they are
Community and collaboration as tools for change
The strong belief that recovery and safety is possible

While our service models are different, the intention is the same: to ensure that people impacted by what they are experiencing aren’t left feeling unseen or unsupported.

Looking ahead… collaborative days like the launch of A Better Tomorrow give us hope - not just for those we work with directly, but for the systems and networks that support families across the UK. By connecting with partners who think holistically, we strengthen care that surrounds families navigating trauma and challenging behaviours.

We’re excited about the possibilities it brings for future learning and partnerships because supporting families and individuals means working together - listening, sharing, connecting and believing that change starts with compassion.

If you want to find out more, please do visit their website by clicking here

Or maybe give them a visit on social media: Instagram , Facebook or LinkedIn

When Things Get Broken: Property Damage and Child to Parent Abuse

Tue, 24 Mar 2026 10:10:31 GMT

One of the things we hear most often at PEGS is:

“They don’t hit me… but they destroy the house.”

A door kicked through. A phone smashed. A hole in the wall. Personal belongings ripped up or thrown outside. Furniture overturned. Glass shattered.

And almost always, the parent follows it with, “I don’t know if this counts.”

It does.

In our work, 91% of the parents we support tell us that their property has been damaged or destroyed as part of their child’s behaviour. That’s not a one-off loss of temper. That’s a pattern.

And patterns matter.

It’s rarely about the object

When something gets broken in this context, it is rarely random.

Parents say things like:

“He knows exactly what to break.”
“It’s always something important to me.”
“When the door goes, I know it’s about control.”

Property damage in Child to Parent Abuse is often about power. It can be a way of saying:

I can reach you.
I can frighten you.
Nothing here is safe.
You can’t stop me.

Over time, it changes how parents live in their own homes. They hide things. They replace items with cheaper versions. They stop putting pictures on walls. They choose their words carefully. They walk on eggshells.

It isn’t “just stuff”. It’s about intimidation, control and fear.

The impact most people don’t see

There is the obvious damage - the broken door, the smashed screen. But what often goes unseen is everything that comes with it.

The financial pressure can be relentless. Replacing phones. Repairing walls. Fixing locks. Some parents go into debt. Others live with damage because they simply can’t afford to fix it.

For families in rented accommodation, there is another layer of fear. We have spoken to parents who are terrified of eviction because of the state of their home.

“I dread the landlord inspection more than the arguments.”

There are safety risks too. Items thrown in anger don’t always land where they were intended. Siblings witness it. Younger children absorb it. Pets hide.

And then there is the emotional toll.

Parents describe the dread - the constant waiting for the next crash or bang. The way their body stays tense. The shame of not telling anyone what’s happening. The fear of being blamed.

“It’s the anticipation. Listening for footsteps. Wondering what will go next.”

When your home stops feeling safe, it affects everything.

Why it gets minimised

Property damage is often dismissed as “normal teenage anger” or “behavioural issues”. Parents are told they need stronger boundaries, better consequences, and different parenting strategies.

But when property damage forms part of a pattern of intimidation, threats or emotional harm, it is not simply behaviour.

It is part of Child to Parent Abuse.

If we ignore it because it hasn’t yet crossed a criminal threshold, we miss the opportunity to intervene early.

What might help

The first step is recognising that this matters.

If things are being broken in a way that feels frightening, targeted or controlling, trust that instinct.

Safety planning can help - thinking about safe spaces, about who you could contact if things escalate, about reducing immediate risks where possible.

Reducing isolation matters too. Shame thrives in silence. Speaking to someone who understands Child to Parent Abuse can shift that sense of being alone with it.

Professionals also need to recognise property damage for what it can represent. It isn’t always about anger management. Sometimes it is about power, and that requires a different response.

At PEGS, we believe parents deserve to feel safe in their own homes.

If your belongings are being destroyed and it feels bigger than “just stuff”, you are not overreacting. You are responding to harm.

And you deserve support that understands that.

6 Years of supporting parental figures

Sun, 22 Mar 2026 15:08:18 GMT

Six Years of PEGS: Reflection, Growth and Looking Ahead

Dear reader,

You may not know that PEGS was created due to lived experience and by identifying a gap in support for parental figures, who are experiencing one of the most heart-breaking forms of domestic abuse. With nothing more than an idea, no funding and a determination to see change, the catalyst for PEGS was born.

I did not know then what PEGS would become. I only knew that something had to be different. That families like mine deserved to be heard, understood and supported without blame or shame. Now, six years on from PEGS being established, I feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude and humility. What started from lived experience has grown into something far bigger than I could have imagined.

Over this time, we have supported more than 14,000 parental figures. Each contact, each story, each moment of trust is something we hold with great care. It is a privilege to walk alongside families in some of their most difficult moments. To every parental figure who has trusted us with their journey, thank you. We see you, we hear you and we are continually inspired by your strength.

This past year has seen child to parent abuse reach wider public awareness, including being highlighted in Hollyoaks. As a direct result of that storyline, over 400 parents and carers came to PEGS for support. This shows just how many families are living with this behind closed doors, and how powerful awareness can be in helping people reach out.

We are also seeing important systemic change. The introduction, hopefully this year, of a legal definition of child to parent abuse where the child is under 16 years of age, will make a significant step forward. This is something we have been campaigning for alongside many others for a long time. It represents recognition, validation and a foundation for more consistent and informed responses to families.

Alongside this, the CPA Awareness Day on October 14th, that we started is now being recognised and used in other countries. What began as a small step to raise awareness has grown into something that is helping to shine a light on this issue globally.

Collaboration continues to sit at the heart of everything we do. Our work alongside partners such as Dewis Choice, Family Lives, Refuge, Mid and West Wales region, Shropshire Domestic Abuse Local Partnership, NHS England, Department for Work and Pensions and many others, far too many to name, has strengthened our ability to influence practice, reach more families and build a more joined up response to child to parent abuse. Together, we are creating change that no single organisation could achieve alone.

Over the past year, we have continued to expand our training and policy work across local authorities and organisations. More professionals are recognising child to parent abuse and seeking ways to respond effectively and compassionately. It has been incredibly encouraging to see so many sectors and services embed our PRAM ( PEGS Risk Awareness Model ) into their practice, supporting earlier identification and more informed responses to CPA.

And yet, despite this progress, the reality remains stark. Last year, one in five women who were killed by a man were mothers, killed by their son or with their son as the primary suspect. This is difficult to read and even harder to accept, but it reinforces why this work matters so deeply. Behind every statistic are families, relationships and opportunities where earlier support could have made a difference.

None of this work happens in isolation. PEGS is what it is because of our incredible team. They bring compassion, expertise and unwavering commitment every single day. They challenge, support and inspire me, and they have helped me grow into a better leader. I feel incredibly fortunate to walk this journey alongside them.

Looking ahead, the future of PEGS is one of continued growth, learning and innovation. With that growth comes new challenges, but also new opportunities to develop solutions, deepen our impact and reach more families who need us. We remain committed to listening, to learning and to working in partnership to create meaningful and lasting change.

PEGS can not and we do not want to do this alone. Whether you are an individual, an organisation or someone who would just like to help create change, we would love to welcome you into our community and support you to recognise and respond with confidence and compassion.

" Change can start with anyone of us at any time, back then I thought why not me, and why not now, so I ask the same of all of you. Why not you, and why not today ?"

Thank you to all who have supported us over the years, to the parental figures who have trusted us with their experiences and journey, we will continue to speak out so that you all are seen and have a voice.

Here's to the next six years

Michelle
Director, PEGS

Allen Lane Foundation Supports New Workshop Lead Role to Expand Support for Parents

Wed, 18 Mar 2026 12:46:36 GMT

We are thrilled to announce that the Allen Lane Foundation has generously funded a new Workshop Lead role to coordinate and deliver online workshops for parents and carers affected by Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) over the next 12 months.

Parents and carers affected by CPA are often isolated, unsupported, and unsure where to turn. Our 2024 survey shows that 96% of parents feel isolated, 94% stressed, 92% scared, and 100% report an impact on emotional wellbeing. Over 70% have had to reduce or leave work. With demand for support rising to over 450 referrals per month and a 116% increase in November 2025 there is an urgent need for structured, accessible help.

Expanding Online Workshops and 1:1 Support

The new Workshop Lead will deliver a weekly online workshop for up to 15 participants, covering practical and emotional wellbeing topics such as stress management, goal-setting, and specialist techniques like Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).

Alongside the weekly sessions, the project will also run:

Bi-monthly two-part specialist workshops
Monthly wellbeing workshops

By taking the lead on workshop delivery, the Workshop Lead will free up our practitioner team to provide more personalised one-to-one support to high-risk parents, reaching an additional estimated 50 parents in need.

Over 12 months, we anticipate that over 200 parents will benefit directly from group workshops, gaining tools to manage risk, improve emotional wellbeing, reduce stress, and build confidence. The workshops will also create a safe space for peer connection, helping to reduce isolation and foster resilience.

Measuring Impact

We will track success through attendance figures, participant feedback, and pre- and post-workshop surveys to capture changes in confidence, coping strategies, and wellbeing. Practitioners will also monitor the effect of increased one-to-one support to ensure parents feel safer, supported, and better able to manage their situation.

Michelle John, our founding director, says:

"Allen Lane Foundation’s continued support enables us to reach more parents and provide the practical guidance and personal support they urgently need. This Workshop Lead role will make a real difference, helping parents feel safer, more confident, and connected, while allowing our practitioners to provide targeted one-to-one support where it’s needed most."

We are incredibly grateful to the Allen Lane Foundation for their ongoing belief in our work. This funding allows us to expand our online support, reach more parents, and provide both group and personalised assistance for those affected by CPA.

Child to Parent Abuse and Financial Abuse

Mon, 16 Mar 2026 14:54:47 GMT

New Workshop: Understanding Financial Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

We’re excited to introduce our new workshop, designed to provide a safe, supportive and confidential space for parental figures to explore financial and economic abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA).

We understand that conversations about money can feel deeply personal and emotionally heavy - especially when they involve our own children. From the start, this session prioritises safety, choice and compassion. There is no pressure to speak or share, and just attending is a powerful step in itself. Financial abuse in CPA is a reality for many families, with at least 82% of parents supported by PEGS report experiencing this form of abuse - from our 2025 survey

One parent PEGS supports shared how

"The abuse has even cost me my job. I was forced to miss shifts and eventually had to resign, which has left me struggling financially and emotionally."

This workshop aims to explore these experiences, offer understanding, and provide tools for support, helping parents regain confidence with financial safety.

What does the workshop cover?

The session gently guides us through:

What financial and economic abuse is, including how it shows up within CPA, and not just adult relationships
How control, guilt, coercion and fear can shape financial decisions in families
Real-life examples of financial abuse, explored through anonymous reflection and discussion
The emotional impact of living with financial pressure, debt, dependency and fear
Healthy financial relationships between parents and children - what they look like and why they matter
Practical steps for regaining financial safety, control and autonomy
Support options, including how banks, services and organisations like PEGS can help

You are supported to reflect privately and at your own pace, with opportunities for gentle group discussion throughout the session.

How it’s delivered

Delivered virtually (through zoom) with links and details posted in our closed Peer Support group.
Facilitated by an experienced PEGS CPA Practitioner with a specialism in finance
Trauma-informed, non-judgemental and grounded in lived experience
Includes reflective questions, guided discussion and practical guidance

Why this workshop matters

Financial abuse within CPA is often normalised, minimised or misunderstood. Many parents don’t recognise it as abuse until the impact becomes more noticeable, from debt, fear, isolation, and loss of independence.

This workshop helps people name what’s happening, understand that they are not to blame and begin rebuilding financial confidence in a way that feels realistic and supportive.

If you would like to know more about this or any of our other workshops, please do reach out to our wonderful admin team at admin@pegsupport.com

Please note, to access any of our workshops you must have a referral with us.

Specialist support

There are some fantastic organisations who are able to provide free confidential advice should you need more specialist support to help you if you are experiencing financial abuse and or debt. You do not have to face this alone. Below are some of the wonderful UK charities and organisations that can help should you need them

StepChange Debt Charity – www.stepchange.org

National Debtline – www.nationaldebtline.org

Surviving Economic Abuse - https://survivingeconomicabuse.org/

Citizens Advice – www.citizensadvice.org.uk

MoneyHelper – www.moneyhelper.org.uk

If you are experiencing financial abuse from your child, you do not have to face this alone PEGS is here for you.

1 in 5 mothers killed by their sons

Sun, 15 Mar 2026 13:14:48 GMT

Hidden Family Abuse: 1 in 5 Mothers Killed by Sons in the Past Year Highlights Child-to-Parent Abuse

Last week in Parliament, Jess Phillips read aloud the names of 108 women killed by men in the UK over the past year.

Among these tragic cases, a disturbing pattern emerged: between International Women’s Day 2025 and International Women’s Day 2026, almost one in five women killed by men were suspected to have been killed by their own sons.

While these cases are rare, they reflect a broader and often hidden issue, child-to-parent abuse (CPA) that affects many families in the UK.

Understanding Child-to-Parent Abuse

C hild-to-parent abuse can include but is not limited to, physical abuse, threats, emotional abuse, property damage, financial exploitation, sexual abuse and coercive or controlling behaviour. Parents experiencing CPA often describe living in fear in their own homes. Many remain silent due to shame, stigma, or fear of being blamed for their child’s behaviour. Although the most extreme cases are rare, CPA is more common than people realise, and early recognition can prevent escalation and protect families.

Matricide and Family Tragedy

The killing of a mother by her child is known as matricide. Between International Women’s Day 2025 and International Women’s Day 2026, nearly 1 in 5 mothers killed by men in the UK were suspected to have been killed by their sons.

These tragedies often involve complex factors such as mental health challenges, substance misuse, trauma, or long-term family difficulties. Many of the mothers involved were still caring for their sons, even as relationships became unsafe.

PEGS recognises the profound grief and trauma faced by families affected by these tragedies.

“We cannot imagine the grief of families who have lost a mother in such circumstances. No parent should have to live in fear their child, and no family should have to navigate this alone. We are sending love to all who have been affected by the horrific act of matricide. At PEGS, we are here to listen, support, and help parental figures find safety, understanding, and hope, even in the most difficult of situations.”
Michelle John, Director, PEGS

How PEGS Supports Families

At PEGS, we work to bring CPA into the public conversation and support families in line with our four key aims:

Raising Awareness: Ensuring CPA is recognised and understood in society.
Providing Specialist Support: One-to-one guidance and safe, compassionate spaces for parents.
Up skilling Professionals: Training teachers, social workers, police officers, and healthcare professionals to respond effectively.
Influencing Policy and Systems: Advocating for CPA recognition in legislation, policy, and safeguarding frameworks.

By combining support, awareness, and advocacy, PEGS aims to prevent harm and help families rebuild safety and hope.

Moving Forward

The statistic that nearly 1 in 5 mothers killed by men were killed by their sons is shocking but it highlights an urgent reality: child-to-parent abuse is real, serious, and largely hidden.

Recognising the signs early, offering support to parents, and amplifying families’ voices can prevent tragedies and create safer homes. Upskilling professionals to recognise, respond and to help them to refer to specialist services is essential for creating change. If you would like to know more about our training , please do get in touch with our wonderful training team training@pegsupport.com

Parents experiencing CPA are not alone, if PEGS is right for you, we are here with you. If you would like to make a referral into our service you can do so by completing a self referral form below.

Child to Parent Abuse Poem

Wed, 11 Mar 2026 19:38:32 GMT

When Words Become a Voice: Michelle’s Poem Recognised in Survivor Initiative

Creativity can be a powerful way to express experiences that are often difficult to put into words. For many survivors and families affected by abuse, poetry and art can open conversations that might otherwise remain unspoken.

Recently, the founding director of PEGS Support, Michelle John, had her poetry recognised as part of an initiative created by Living Keys, a charity supporting survivors of domestic abuse through community, creativity and empowerment.

From a Personal Moment to a Wider Audience

Michelle originally wrote the poem during one of the most difficult periods in her personal journey. It was never intended to be shared.

However, during the PEGS Conference last year, held on Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day, there was a segment dedicated to poetry written by parents and carers who had experienced child-to-parent abuse.

As someone who has always stood alongside the families PEGS supports, Michelle chose to share something deeply personal.

What happened next was unexpected.

Parental figures impacted by child-to-parent abuse shared how strongly the poem resonated with their own experiences. Professionals working in the sector said it helped them better understand the complex emotions families face.

Following the conference, a member of the PEGS board nominated Michelle’s poem for a creative initiative run by Living Keys, which invited survivors to submit poetry and artwork reflecting their lived experiences.

A Gathering of Survivor Voices

Michelle was invited to attend a special event at Peterborough Cathedral alongside other survivors whose work had been selected as part of the project.Her poem was awarded third place in the competition and has now been included in a published collection celebrating the creativity, courage and resilience of survivors who have chosen to share their stories through art and poetry.

The book brings together voices that might otherwise remain unheard, helping readers understand the emotional realities behind experiences of abuse and survival.

For Michelle, the recognition was unexpected, but the opportunity to raise awareness about child-to-parent abuse made the moment even more meaningful.

Michelle’s Poem

Dear You

I don’t know when we started speaking to each other through walls instead of across tables.

I don’t know the exact day my shoulders began to tense at the sound of your voice,

Or when I started measuring my words like I was stepping barefoot on broken glass.

I miss you.

Not the you that’s here now though I love you still

But the you who used to lean into me for hugs,

Who laughed so hard it lit up the room,

Who trusted me enough to be gentle.

Some days, I feel like I’ve lost you.

And then I see your face and I’m reminded you’re right here.

It’s a strange kind of loss – to mourn someone who still leaves their shoes by the door.

I hold onto hope.

Hope that this is not where our story ends,

That one day, you’ll lay your armour down,

And I’ll be able to meet you there –

In the quiet place where love feels safe again.

I’ll be waiting.

Not without hurt.

Not without scars.

But with my arms ready,

Because they have always been yours.

Love, Mum

Michelle’s Reflection;

“I wrote this poem during one of the darkest times, and it was never meant to be shared. At our conference we invited parents we support to share their own poetry, and because I’ve always said I stand alongside them, I chose to share something deeply personal too.

I never expected the response it received. Parents told me it reflected exactly how they felt, and professionals said it helped them understand the emotional reality of child-to-parent abuse.

Seeing it now shared more widely through this initiative is incredibly meaningful, because if it helps even one person feel understood or helps someone better understand what families experience, then it has served its purpose. Most importantly, it helps bring greater awareness to child-to-parent abuse.”

A Day In The Life At PEGS: HR

Tue, 10 Mar 2026 10:09:26 GMT

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Human Resources

At PEGS, people are at the heart of everything we do, and in HR you see that up close every single day. My day-to-day isn’t just policies and paperwork (although yes, there’s some of that!). It’s conversations, check-ins, problem-solving, planning training, supporting managers, and sometimes just being a steady presence when someone needs clarity or reassurance. That human side is what makes the role meaningful.

Part of my role also involves being a first point of contact for parents and professionals who are considering a referral. I often speak to them before anything formal is submitted, answering questions, explaining what we do, and helping them understand whether PEGS is the right fit. I really value those conversations, they’re an opportunity to offer reassurance, provide clarity, and ensure people feel informed and supported from the very beginning.

Staff wellbeing is something I care about deeply. When people feel supported, listened to, and valued, they do their best work, and more importantly, they feel good doing it. That doesn’t happen by accident. It takes thoughtful processes, strong communication, and meaningful training to give people the confidence and skills to thrive.

For me, this role is about building something sustainable: a workplace where staff, parents, and professionals alike feel empowered, supported, and proud to be part of PEGS.

Creating a workplace where staff feel heard, empowered, and confident helps us provide the best possible support to parents and carers who rely on us. ��

Marie

Employee Appreciation Day

Fri, 06 Mar 2026 09:17:58 GMT

Our Founding Director thanks the PEGS team

Dear Team,

Today is Employee Appreciation Day, but really, this is about so much more than a date in the calendar. It’s about you, the people who make PEGS what it is.

Our values of Listen, Support and Empower aren’t just words we share with parental figures. They are lived out every single day within our team. You listen to one another, you support each other through challenges, and you empower those around you to grow, learn, and feel confident in what they do. That matters more than you may realise.

Each of you plays a different role, but every role is essential to our team, our work, and most importantly to those who need us. I often talk about how our team is like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. PEGS simply wouldn’t be the same if even one piece was missing. Whether your work is visible every day or happens quietly behind the scenes, it all connects and it all counts. PEGS works because you work together.

The care, compassion, and respect you show to our parents is mirrored in the way you treat each other. You create a culture where people feel safe to speak up, supported when things are tough, and encouraged to be their best. You also take the time to notice and celebrate each other’s wins no matter how big or small because you understand that progress, effort, and growth all deserve recognition. That culture doesn’t happen by accident; it’s built by the people in it.

I want you to know how incredibly proud I am of every single one of you. Not just for what you do, but for who you are. Your dedication, honesty, compassion, and teamwork inspire me daily. You continue to challenge me, support me, and help me grow not only as a leader, but as a person. For that, I am deeply grateful.

PEGS is strong because of you. Because of your hearts, your commitment, and your willingness to listen, support, and empower, both each other and the parental figures we stand alongside. I hope today gives you a moment to pause and recognise the difference you make, and how valued you truly are.

Whether this makes you shy away from the recognition or step up and truly own the incredible person you are, please know this: I am so, so proud of you all, and I would have been so thankful to have had any one of you support me and my family in our time of need.

We celebrate each other every day, but today is also about you recognising just how appreciated you truly are.

Thank you for being part of our team, for helping not only me, but each other to be the best version of themselves so we can show up every day in the way those who experience child to parent abuse need.

Michelle

International Women’s Day 2026

Thu, 05 Mar 2026 07:46:41 GMT

Celebrating International Women’s Day 2026.

International Women’s Day (IWD) is a moment each year to celebrate the remarkable achievements of women, to reflect on the progress we’ve made towards equality, and to recommit to creating a world where every woman and girl can thrive.

This year, the global theme is “Give to Gain” a powerful reminder that when we give our time, knowledge, support, advocacy, mentorship, and opportunities, we all rise together. It’s a call for generosity, collaboration and collective action: to share our voices, to open doors for others, to champion opportunities, and to help build stronger, more inclusive communities where everyone benefits.

At PEGS, we’ve always believed that true change comes when we support each other, not only in words, but in action. International Women’s Day gives us the chance to celebrate the women we know, those we work alongside, and those whose work and leadership inspires us every day. These women give so much to their families, their communities, their professions, and the causes they champion and in doing so, they help others gain confidence, opportunity, strength, voice, and visibility.

Below, we want to honour some of the incredible women who inspire us with their dedication, compassion, leadership, and generosity:

Anna Bowler - Content Annie
Cara Rainbow - Dewis Choice
Bethan Pell , PHD student, Cardiff University
Maya Badham - Loop Safeguarding
Regina Martin - The confidence Healer
Kate Connor Shropshire Council Lived Experience Domestic Abuse Project Officer
Jo Jacklin NIDAS - Norfolk Integrated Domestic Abuse Service
Chrissa Wadlow Sunshine Support
Nicki Wilkinson ISVA manager, Axis
Mwenya Chimba Head of training, Welsh Women's Aid
Catherine Haworth - Haworth Family Law
Amy Mantle - Love Media Group
Emma Storey Standing Together Against Domestic Abuse
Bernie Ryan, Institute For Addressing Strangulation
Charlotte Almond Staffordshire Womens Aid
Jo Kinvig Civil Servant
Lynne Crawford, Thriving Alone CIC
Sam Beckinsale We Thrive Consulting
Katherine Ahluwalia Principle Operations Manager , Restore -Womens Aid
Keely Grainger Safer Places
Rhiannon Edwards, Cheshire East Domestic Abuse Development Advisor
Dr Ruth Weir, Deputy Director Violence and Society Centre
Maya Balachandran, Capgemini and Safelives ‘Change Maker’
Anna Bowden Dyfed Powys Police Crime Commissioner's Office
Anna Waters, Anna Waters Art studio
Dr Asha Patel, Innovating minds

“International Women’s Day is a reminder of the power we have when we support one another. ‘Give to Gain’ speaks so strongly to what I see every day. Women lifting others up, sharing their knowledge, creating opportunities, and making space for voices to be heard. When women are supported and empowered, everyone benefits. I am incredibly proud to work alongside and celebrate so many inspiring women who continue to give so much, and in doing so help others thrive.”
Michelle, Director of PEGS

To all the women whose names we share here and to everyone we know who shows up, gives generously, supports without question, and helps others grow thank you. You make a difference every day. You help us all gain strength, resilience, hope and possibility.

And to everyone reading: take a moment this International Women’s Day to celebrate the women in your life. Tell them what they mean to you. Share their stories. Support their ambitions. Because when we give, we all gain.

Happy International Women’s Day 2026!

March at PEGS

Wed, 04 Mar 2026 11:44:10 GMT

March at PEGS

March is a busy and exciting month at PEGS. Alongside our regular weekly support sessions, we have specialist training, wellbeing spaces, professional information sessions, and of course it’s our 6th Birthday Celebration!

Whether you’re a parent, carer, guardian, or professional, there are many opportunities available for you to connect with us or to find out more about what we are up to.

One to-one-support

Our team of highly skilled practitioners offers daily support to parental figures experiencing Child to Parent Abuse. Each session is tailored to the individual, providing a safe space to be heard, as well as practical and emotional support, advocacy, risk assessments, and safety planning. Parental figures can access up to 12 weeks of one-to-one support, depending on their area and individual circumstances and if they wish to engage at this level.

In addition to one-to-one support, parental figures can also access the services listed below. Even if one-to-one support isn’t available or suitable, these resources remain free and open to provide guidance, connection, and support.

Weekly Practitioner Led Sessions

Our practitioner-led sessions run every week at various times and provide a safe, confidential space for parental figures experiencing CPA. These sessions are led by our fantastic team of trained practitioners who understand the complexities of CPA.

Weekly session times include (these can vary):

Monday: 12pm to 1pm & our new practitioner led session for parents with adult children which is at 3:30pm - 4:30pm.
Tuesday: 11am to 12pm & 7pm to 8pm
Wednesday: 10am to 11am
Thursday: 1:30pm to 2:30pm, Thursday 8pm to 9pm
Friday: Fridays 10am to 11am.

These spaces are designed to provide practical and emotional support, reduce isolation and remind parents and carers that they are not alone in their journey. These are group sessions and the element of peer support is often appreciated by those who attend. In fact 100% of parental figures who attended our practitioner led sessions said their wellbeing had improved by attending a session. Parental figures can attend one session or all of them (if they apply) , they can stay for the whole hour or just for as long as they can. There is no pressure to speak or to share their experiences and situations, although saying hello when parents first join is always welcomed. For us to keep these sessions as safe as possible and to follow our safeguarding processes, parental figures must have an active referral with PEGS to access these sessions.

Wellbeing Session, 4th March
Join our fantastic practitioner for a dedicated wellbeing session. These sessions are delivered on the first Wednesday of the month and focus on emotional regulation, grounding, and creating small moments of calm in what can often feel like overwhelming circumstances. Or as one of the PEGS team says finding the small glimmers where we can.

With each session having a different focus there is an opportunity to learn a new technique or wellbeing technique to help you look after you, as you matter too.

Professional Information Session

2nd March | 10:00am – 10:30am

We are also delivering our free monthly information session for professionals on PEGS, our referral pathway, services we provide and expectations. There is also an opportunity to ask any PEGS related questions ( we will not be able to provide any updates on referrals or discuss individual cases at this session ) and you will get to meet some of the training team too . If you miss this months, do not worry you can register for our next session by clicking here .

You can attend as many sessions as you like and we will also send a handout after the session with a recap on what we have spoken about too.

Training in March

We are delivering our accredited specialist Child to Parent Abuse training across several local authorities and organisations this month.

Half-Day Training – 3rd, 5th, 16th and 24th March
Full-Day Training – 11th, 17th, 19th, 26th March

Our training equips professionals to respond to CPA with confidence, compassion and clarity, ensuring families feel heard and supported. We offer a range of sessions to suit your needs, from half-day and full-day courses to awareness sessions, as well as our PRAM training (available after completing a PEGS course) and other exciting learning opportunities.

You can visit our Eventbrite to see what fully funded training is currently available, or head to our training page on the website where you can book individual sessions for you or the team.

PEGS Turns 6 – Birthday Celebration

23rd March | 10:00am | Online | Free to attend for Parents and Professionals

We’re celebrating six years of breaking the silence around Child to Parent Abuse and standing alongside families experiencing abusive behaviours from their child, no matter what age.

This special free online event will reflect on our journey, highlight key milestones, and share what’s ahead for PEGS!

Tickets are still available! Whether you're a Parental Figure, Professional or someone new to PEGS, You can secure your place today by clicking here, or feel free to share with colleagues too.

Finally, we will be having our monthly team meeting and various team members will be attending different events and complete training sessions themselves. We promote continued learning and development so that the PEGS team can continue to learn and upskill in how we support families who are experiencing CPA.

We will also be catching up with some of our friends and having meetings with new connections, you can find out more about who we will be joining this month on our social media platforms, if you do not follow us already, why not connect with us on one ( or even all ) of our socials below:

How are you connecting with us this March?

Understanding Pet Abuse in CPA

Fri, 27 Feb 2026 10:23:58 GMT

Understanding Pet Abuse in CPA

Trigger Warning: This blog discusses pet abuse and may be upsetting. Please pause or step away if needed.

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) can take many forms. This month, we want to focus on a form that tends to be less spoken about: pet abuse.

Pet abuse within CPA happens when a child of any age uses threats or direct abusive behaviours towards a family pet to intimidate, control or emotionally impact a parent, carer, or guardian. Pets are more than companions, they are members of the family. Targeting them can create fear and anxiety for the whole household.

Pet abuse in CPA can appear differently in every family. Some examples shared by parents include:

Threatening to give away or abandon a family pet
Intentionally frightening or distressing the pet to upset a parent
Hitting or kicking a pet
Preventing a parent from caring for their pet, including stopping feeding or grooming
Not allowing a pet to be seen by a vet
Sexual abuse or sexual touching of a pet
Killing a pet as a way to punish or intimidate

Studies and surveys reveal the seriousness of this behaviour and the impact it has on pets themselves: 36% of parents reported their child had harmed a pet, and 9% said their child had killed one - from our most recent survey in 2025. You can visit our most recent survey by clicking here.

The Impact on Parents and Families

For parents and carers who are seeing abuse directed to a beloved pet can be as traumatic as if the behaviours were towards themselves. It often does and can:

Heighten fear and anxiety within the household
Undermine a parent’s sense of safety and control
Increase feelings of guilt, helplessness, and isolation
Affect other children and family members
Leave long-lasting emotional scars for both pets and the family.

"I’m constantly on edge, afraid to leave my son alone with our dog in case something happens. I feel on edge all the time"

Pet abuse is often part of a broader pattern of coercive or controlling behaviours in Domestic Abuse itself.

Recognising animal abuse as a form of abuse is essential for both protecting parents and for ensuring pets are safe.

As professionals, it’s important to consider pets when working with families who may be experiencing abusive behaviours from a child or any form of domestic abuse. Pets are often deeply loved family members, and their safety can have a direct impact on the emotional wellbeing of parents, carers, and other household members such as siblings.

By standing alongside parents and families, providing belief and creating safe spaces for disclosure, professionals can help protect both people and pets. Early recognition, non-judgemental support, and safeguarding practices that include pets can make a real difference in changing lives.

At PEGS, we continue to advocate for understanding, safety, and non-judgemental support for all forms of abuse, including pet abuse.

If you are experiencing pet abuse in your household, or you know someone who is, please keep in mind the organisations below.

Loop

Website: https://loopsafe.wixsite.com/loop-safeguarding

Loop Safeguarding exists because there is a real and important link between interpersonal abuse (like CPA and other forms of abuse) and the abuse of animals. They work with professionals across sectors from social care and law enforcement to health and community support to deepen understanding of this connection, support better safeguarding practices, and ensure animals aren’t overlooked in assessments and responses.

RSPCA – Pets and Domestic Abuse Support

Website: https://www.rspca.org.uk/adviceandwelfare/pets/general/abuse
The Royal Society for the P r evention of Cruelty to Animals (RSPCA) provides guidance on recognising animal cruelty and abuse, including when pets are impacted by domestic or family abuse. Their page links to services that offer confidential pet fostering, helping people flee abusive situations without having to leave beloved animals behind. They also offer advice on local support services.

The Links Group – Animal-inclusive Safeguarding & Pet Fostering

Website: https://www.thelinksgroup.org.uk
The Links Group raises awareness of the link between abuse of people and animals. They work with partner organisations on policy, training and advocacy, and support pet fostering initiatives that help people escaping abuse keep their pets safe. This includes best practice guidance and collaborative safeguarding work across sectors.

Dogs Trust Freedom Project

Website: https://dogstrustfreedomproject.org.uk
Part of Dogs Trust, the Freedom Project offers free, confidential fostering for dogs whose owners are fleeing domestic abuse, including CPA‑related harm to pets. Dogs are placed with volunteer foster carers until the owner can be safely reunited with them. This helps reduce fear and emotional barriers to seeking safety.

Cats Protection Lifeline

Website: https://www.cats.org.uk/what-we-do/cp-lifeline
Cats Protection’s Lifeline service offers confidential cat fostering across regions, supporting owners escaping abusive households. This enables people to get help for themselves without having to surrender their pets permanently, reducing one of the barriers survivors face when seeking safety.

Endeavour – Pet Fostering Service

Website: https://endeavourproject.org.uk/
Endeavour provides in‑house pet fostering support in parts of England for people fleeing domestic abuse or unable to care for their animals due to crisis circumstances. They help keep pets safe and cared for while owners focus on their own safety and stability.

Service Shoutout - Loop Safeguarding

Wed, 25 Feb 2026 11:21:06 GMT

Service Shoutout - Loop Safeguarding

At PEGS, we know that CPA doesn’t just affect parents, it touches everyone who shares the home, including pets and companion animals. Pets often provide comfort, love, and stability, but sadly, they can also become targets in abusive family dynamics.

From our research, 36% of parents told us their pets had been harmed by their child. In the most heartbreaking cases, 9% shared that their child had even gone on to kill a pet. When this happens, it impacts the whole family, pets are part of the household, and their safety and wellbeing matters just as much as the parents’ and children’s.

PEGS’ routinely asks about any companion pets in the household, the questions form part of our risk assessments and ensures we are capturing the family's reality for everyone in the home. Are you as a professional considering pets as part of your assessments or discussions with parental figures and family members? If not, perhaps this is something you could consider to include in your practice.

PEGS has had support from one of the few specialist services on animal / companion pet abuse and our Founding Director Michelle completed the PAWS champion training to upskill knowledge and awareness around this form of abuse.

Pets matter too and this is why this month our service spotlight goes to Loop Safeguarding.

Created by Maya Badham who is a trusted expert in domestic abuse, sexual violence, and trauma-informed practice, and a pioneering authority on the link between animal cruelty and interpersonal abuse. With over a decade of experience across frontline support, advocacy, and education roles, she holds a Master’s in Human Rights Law and is a qualified Independent Sexual Violence Advisor with extensive experience supporting female, male, and LGBTQ+ survivors of sexual and domestic abuse.

If your family has pets and you’re navigating things that feel overwhelming, you’re not alone. And if you’re speaking with professionals or support services, it can help to share concerns about your pets too.

Or perhaps you’re interested in becoming a PAWS Champion yourself or know someone who might be?

To learn more about the incredible work Loop Safeguarding does, visit their website: You’ll find research, resources, and opportunities to upskill and be part of the change that pets need.

I’ve become an Orange Button Holder - Grace CPA Practitioner

Fri, 13 Feb 2026 10:21:56 GMT

I’ve become an Orange Button Holder - Grace CPA Practitioner

I recently attended a training session through Shropshire Council on Suicide Prevention and upon completion of the training became an Orange Button Holder. The Orange Button Scheme has been introduced locally as part of efforts to raise awareness of suicide prevention, reduce stigma and to build supportive communities.

Being an Orange Button Holder means I am able to provide support and awareness of suicide and suicide prevention. I can listen empathetically, support and signpost to other support services. By being an Orange Button Holder does not mean I am a Therapist or a Counsellor. From completing the training with Shropshire Council, I am equipped to encourage conversations meaning, making that conversation easier for individuals to talk about suicide openly with no stigma.

My role consists of :

Being approachable and not running from the word suicide
To be a connector, a first point to start a conversation
To be a non-judgemental, caring and understanding listener
To give signposting support and information
Someone to ask directly about suicide.

Supporting Services

Samaritans - Tel 116 123 (Available 24 hours a day)

Hub Of Hope - https://hubofhope.co.uk/

Papyrus - https://www.papyrus-uk.org/

To find out more about becoming an Orange Button Holder take a look at your Local Authorities website. You can find more information via this video -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gu-AgazwcYw

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Social Media

Tue, 10 Feb 2026 10:56:31 GMT

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Social Media

Social media plays an important role at PEGS. It’s not just about sharing posts... it’s about connection, awareness and making sure those who are experiencing child to parent abuse, know they are not alone.

Through our platforms Facebook, Instagram, Bluesky, LinkedIn, YouTube, and future work on TikTok - we reach parents, carers, professionals and wider communities who may be seeking support, information, or simply reassurance. For many, social media is the first place they find us.

We’re incredibly grateful to receive so many kind, supportive messages. Alongside those are messages that are harder to read, messages filled with fear and isolation. Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) is still so widely misunderstood, and for many families it’s something they’ve never felt able to speak about openly. That’s why raising awareness, amplifying voices and collaborating with like-minded professionals matters so much.

In 2025 alone, our content reached over 1.2 million views. And if even one of those views helped someone feel seen, believed, or less alone then we’ve already done our job.

So, what does a day in the life look like?

Most mornings start with checking notifications, new messages, comments, tags, shares and mentions. Some need practical responses, others need care, sensitivity and a listening ear. Alongside this, there’s our peer support group: approving new members through PEGS referral IDs, reviewing posts waiting for moderation and making sure the space remains safe, supportive and respectful for parents and carers. It's so important to make sure each and every parent in our group feels comfortable and safe.

Content scheduling is another key part of the role. This ensures families don’t miss information about practitioner sessions, workshops or programmes especially those within peer support. Everything we share is shaped by PEGS’ four pillars:

-Supporting parental figures

-Raising awareness of CPA

-Upskilling professionals

-Influencing policy

These pillars guide our language, our messaging and the way we show up online always centring the voices and experiences of those we support.

The role goes beyond posting. It includes writing and uploading blogs, supporting the team to create resources such as webinars, presentations and workshops, contributing to creative projects, and also helping with training. Communication and language is essential in this role, which is why it’s supported by training in domestic abuse awareness, wellbeing, safeguarding and trauma-informed practice - alongside social media training.

No two days are ever the same. Some days involve attending events, in-person interviews or media work with our director Michelle. Others include training sessions, conferences or meetings with collaborators. Every part of the role feeds into the same purpose: making sure CPA is understood, spoken about and responded to effectively.

Working behind the scenes at PEGS is a privilege. It’s about care, responsibility and holding space even through a screen. Because for so many families, that screen is the first place they feel safe enough to reach out.

Tackling Domestic Abuse in Shropshire

Fri, 06 Feb 2026 14:42:16 GMT

Tackling Domestic Abuse in Shropshire:

The Shropshire Domestic Abuse Local Partnership Board is inviting anyone living or working in Shropshire who has an interest in tackling domestic abuse to take part in the public consultation of the draft Shropshire Domestic Abuse Partnership Strategy, which closes on the 2nd of March 2026.

This strategy has been developed by the Shropshire Domestic Abuse Local Partnership Board, with valuable input from victims and survivors through Shropshire’s Lived Experience Advisory Group (LEAG), led by the Domestic Abuse Prevention team at Shropshire Council. The draft strategy aims to reduce domestic abuse in Shropshire and drive positive cultural change across all services in Shropshire. It recognises the importance of a coordinated, proactive, and timely response to protect individuals affected by domestic abuse, enabling everyone to live safe, healthy, and fulfilling lives, free from abuse.

We encourage you to take part in the consultation as it is vital that the voices of lived experience, alongside those of professionals, help influence the final strategy.

To take part in the consultation please click here: https://getinvolved.shropshire.gov.uk/consultations/draft-shropshire-domestic-abuse-partnership-strategy-2026-2029/ . If you require the survey in an alternate format, please reach out to TellUs@shropshire.gov.uk . You can also share your comments in writing by sending an email to TellUs@shropshire.gov.uk with the subject line ‘Draft Shropshire Domestic Abuse Strategy’ or by post to the Feedback and Insight Team at Shropshire Council, PO Box 4826, Shrewsbury, SY1 9LJ.

PEGS Turns 6 - Come and Celebrate With Us

Wed, 04 Feb 2026 10:39:51 GMT

PEGS Turns 6 - Come and Celebrate With Us!

This March, PEGS turns six!

PEGS began as a conversation rooted in lived experience and difficult conversations about Child to Parent Abuse that weren’t happening enough. Over time, that conversation grew into something bigger: a national organisation supporting parents and carers affected by CPA, advocating for change, and helping shape how CPA is understood and responded to across the UK.

But at its heart, PEGS has always been about people. About parents and carers whose experiences were often minimised, misunderstood or overlooked.

Over the past six years, we have listened carefully to parents’ stories - many shared at a time when they felt unheard or blamed. Those voices have shaped everything we do and will continue doing so. They’ve informed our work with professionals, our contribution to research, and our efforts to influence policy and practice around CPA.

We’ve worked alongside services, partners, and practitioners to improve recognition of CPA, while continuing to centre parents’ voices and hold space for the complexity that exists within families.

Again and again, what parents have shown us is how hidden Child to Parent Abuse can be. How long families can experience this form of abuse before being believed.

As we look ahead, our focus remains clear. We will continue to break the silence around CPA. We will keep pushing for better understanding and responses. We will keep working to support families earlier. We will continue building safer spaces where parental figures feel heard.

To mark six years of PEGS, we’re inviting you to join us for a free online event this March!

During the event, we’ll:

Look back on our journey over the past six years
Share key learning and reflections from our work
Talk about what’s next for PEGS and for the families we support
Introduce members of the PEGS team and some of our lovely guests

This is a chance to reflect, connect, and to celebrate how far things have come together.

Whether you’re a parent, carer or guardian, a professional supporting families, someone who has attended our training or conferences in the past, part of an organisation we’ve worked alongside, or simply someone who wants to support our work around Child to Parent Abuse, you are very welcome.

Event details:
Monday 23rd March
10:00am
Online | Free to attend

You can register by clicking here:

Reaching six years feels like an important milestone not just for PEGS, but for everyone who has trusted us with their experiences over the years. The team at PEGS say thank you - we look would love you to be part of this special celebration with us.

Looking After Our Wellbeing: Parent Mental Health Day

Fri, 30 Jan 2026 10:08:41 GMT

Parent Mental Health Day

Wellbeing looks different for everyone, especially for parents and caregivers experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). There’s no one-size-fits-all, what helps one person may not work for another, and that’s okay.

We asked our team how they look after their own wellbeing, and here’s what they shared.

Finding Calm in Simple Things

Some of us find peace in small, everyday moments. Being in the garden, tending to plants in a greenhouse, or just stepping outside for a few minutes of fresh air can slow the mind and help us feel a little more grounded. Others enjoy reading a few pages at the end of a busy day, it’s a quick escape, a quiet pause just for yourself.

Even short breaks, like stepping back to breathe, pausing to reset, or doing something hands-on like colouring or crafting, can be surprisingly powerful. One team member shared how they lose themselves for hours in colouring, helping to quiet the constant “overthinking” and give their mind a break.

Moving the Body, Clearing the Mind:

Physical movement can also be a simple yet effective way to support mental health. Walking outdoors, decluttering a messy space, or just getting some fresh air can calm the mind, reduce stress, and even improve sleep. One of us mentioned how keeping a tidy environment helps reduce mental clutter, it’s amazing how much a little physical organisation can lift your mood (with a well deserved brew afterwards!)

Doing Something Special:

Whether it’s cooking, going bowling, taking a long walk in nature, or enjoying a hot cup of tea with a feel good book, doing something enjoyable and intentional can make a difference. These “small moments” may seem minor, but they’re valuable opportunities to reset, recharge and give yourself permission to focus on your own needs even if it's for only 60 seconds.

We know that sometimes, you need more than these small strategies and that’s okay too. Support exists, whether it’s chatting with a friend or family member, accessing therapy, or for the team, using our employee resources like Paycare. Knowing support is there if you need it can make life feel a little less heavy and reassure you that you’re not alone.

While all of us at PEGS understand how important wellbeing is, we also know that on tougher days we need real, practical ways to support ourselves.

One of the ways we support ourselves at PEGS is through Paycare, which is available to all members of the PEGS team. Paycare is an employee wellbeing and benefits service that provides access to a wide range of support. This includes things like counselling and mental health support, GP and health advice, financial and legal guidance and everyday wellbeing resources which can be accessed anytime, anywhere. Having access to Paycare means our team can get confidential, professional support whenever they need it both for their mental and physical wellbeing.

Alongside this, we also offer wellbeing days.

A wellbeing day is exactly what it sounds like… a day dedicated to looking after yourself. Working with families impacted by Child to Parent Abuse can be emotionally demanding at times, and we recognise that this work can sometimes affect our own wellbeing too. A wellbeing day gives a team member the space to pause, rest, and recharge.

That might look like staying at home and watching a favourite TV show, going for a gentle walk in the local park, spending time doing something enjoyable, or simply having a day without pressure or expectations. There’s no “right” way to use a wellbeing day as it’s about doing whatever helps support your own wellbeing in that moment of time.

Because looking after ourselves helps us continue to show up with care, compassion, and understanding for the families we support.

A reminder from the team at PEGS

Taking care of your wellbeing isn’t about being perfect or doing everything “right.” It’s about pausing when you need to, finding what helps you feel a little lighter, and being kind to yourself on the harder days.

At PEGS we see the importance of wellbeing for our team and the parental figures we support. It’s not about distractions, it’s about moments that give us space and a sense of calmness in lives that are often unpredictable.

Even small steps count. Every breath, every walk, every page of a book, every plant nurtured, every supportive conversation they all matter!

To all the parents, carers, and guardians reading this: take a moment for yourself today, however that looks for you.

#ParentMentalHealthDay

Sibling Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Thu, 29 Jan 2026 12:13:55 GMT

Sibling Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

When people think about Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), they often forget about the impact it has on siblings.

Sibling abuse is something we hear about far more often than people realise. In fact, 50% of parental figures who took part in our 2023 report told us that there were other children in the home being directly impacted.

When one child uses abusive behaviours towards a sibling, it doesn’t stay “between them”. It affects the whole household with a bounce on impact to careers, education, social life and also relationships.

The hidden impact on families

Many PEGS parents describe feeling torn between protecting one child from abuse while also managing abusive behaviours directed at themselves. When feeling this way, it’s often hard to know where to turn for support.

Sibling abuse can take many forms and may happen alongside abusive behaviours towards a parental figure. We often hear from many of PEGS’ parents on what this looks like for them.

In the cases from our 2023 report, where other children in the home were targeted, the behaviours were reported as follows:

Hitting or kicking (43% of respondents said siblings had experienced this in their home)

Strangling or suffocating (13%)

Verbal abuse (56%)

Sexual abuse (1%)

Threatening (46%)

Intimidation (47%)

Sibling abuse is often minimised and parents are frequently told that it’s “just siblings falling out” or that it’s "normal behaviour”. This is the type of response that dismisses many families who are seeking support.

When sibling abuse is recognised as part of CPA, it can help professionals realise the true impact it has on the wider family - leading to more effective responses.

It’s important to keep in mind that these behaviours are not “normal sibling rivalry”.

If sibling abuse is occurring alongside Child to Parent Abuse, you are not alone, and support is available.

Whether it is PEGS who supports you, or another organisation. There are many different ways of support.

Us at PEGS , solely support parents and carers experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, including when siblings are impacted. Our support includes practitioner-led sessions, workshops, peer support and bespoke workshops and group programmes. Just because we don’t work directly with children, doesn't mean we believe children don’t matter - we just believe parental figures matter too.

Sibs
Sibs is a charity supporting siblings of disabled children and adults. They offer free information, advice and support that can be helpful for siblings affected by complex family dynamics. They have many great resources on their website, which you can take a look at by visiting: https://www.sibs.org.uk/

Family Lives
Family Lives is another fantastic organisation PEGS works with, who provides free, confidential support for families, including advice around sibling relationships, behaviour, and emotional wellbeing. They too, have many resources available : https://www.familylives.org.uk/

We know it’s not always easy to find the right support for you and your family. This is where the Hub of Hope can really help. While it isn’t specialised specifically in sibling abuse, it is a free and brilliant tool that brings together support services from across the UK, helping you find the right help in your local area. The Hub of Hope doesn’t run its own helpline, but it clearly signposts to trusted, 24/7 support options including Shout, a free text helpline you can contact any time by texting 85258. It also includes many fantastic, free mental health resources that you can explore at your own pace, when you’re ready: https://hubofhope.co.uk/

Service Shoutout: Staffordshire Women’s Aid

Wed, 28 Jan 2026 11:24:19 GMT

Service Shoutout: Staffordshire Women’s Aid

This month, the team at PEGS would like to take a moment to recognise and celebrate the important work of Staffordshire Women’s Aid.

Who is Staffordshire Women’s Aid?

For many years, Staffordshire Women’s Aid has been a trusted source of support for women, children and families affected by domestic and sexual abuse across Staffordshire and Stoke-on-Trent. Their work is rooted in compassion, belief and understanding, creating spaces where survivors feel listened to, supported and never judged.

They provide a wide range of services, including a 24/7 confidential helpline, refuge accommodation, counselling, community-based support, legal advice clinics, and specialist services for children and young people. Their approach recognises that every survivor’s experience is different, and that support should be shaped around the individual... and not the system.

What really stands out to us is their trauma-informed, survivor-led approach. Staffordshire Women’s Aid prioritises choice, safety and dignity, empowering people to move forward in ways that feel right for them, and at a pace that feels manageable.

We are incredibly grateful for organisations like Staffordshire Women’s Aid who work tirelessly to support families and challenge abuse in all its forms. Their impact is real and felt by so many.

Supporting professionals and strengthening responses

Alongside their direct support for survivors, Staffordshire Women’s Aid also plays a key role in upskilling professionals and organisations working on the frontline.

They have been delivering CPD-accredited training on domestic and sexual violence for several years, with the aim of creating lasting change through education and strong multi-agency partnerships. This work is vital, as survivors often have a range of additional support needs, including mental health, physical health, substance use and involvement with the criminal justice system, all of which require informed and coordinated responses.

As part of this commitment, Staffordshire Women’s Aid is currently offering a free online Sexual Violence Awareness webinar, creating space for learning, reflection and deeper understanding of an issue that affects so many lives.

Thursday 5th February 2026
11:00 – 12:00
Online via MS Teams

The session is open to professionals, students, frontline workers, and anyone wanting to build their knowledge and confidence around sexual violence.

You can find out more about their training and webinars by clicking here!

Opportunities like this are so important in helping build informed, compassionate responses and we at PEGS are thankful to organisations like Staffordshire Women’s Aid for continuing to lead this work.

If you or someone you know needs support, help is available:

24/7 Helpline: 0300 330 5959

Referrals and support, please click here.

Or visit their website to find out more about the fantastic difference they're making.

Together, we continue to listen, to learn, and to stand alongside those impacted by abuse.

Zoom: A Simple Guide to Accessing PEGS Sessions

Fri, 23 Jan 2026 10:54:25 GMT

Getting Started with Zoom: A Simple Guide to Accessing PEGS Sessions

At PEGS, we know that reaching out for support can feel like a big step. We also know that technology can sometimes add another layer of inconvenience... especially if Zoom is new to you, or something you don’t use very often.

We’ve created a simple guide to help you access our online sessions.

Our practitioner led sessions, workshops and programmes are all delivered via Zoom. For many parents and carers, this offers flexibility, privacy and the chance to join from a space that feels safe for them.

To make things easier, we’ve put together two versions of our Zoom guide, so you can choose what works best for you:

A step-by-step guide with screenshots, showing exactly what to click and what you’ll see on screen
A written guide without screenshots, for those who prefer simple instructions without images

Both guides talk you through how to:

Download Zoom
Join a PEGS session using a link
Adjust your audio and camera settings
Know what to expect when you enter a session

You’ll find both Zoom guides below:

The grief we don’t talk about: when parenting comes at a distance

Thu, 22 Jan 2026 10:00:00 GMT

The grief we don’t talk about: when parenting comes at a distance

When we talk about child to parent abuse, the focus is often and understandably, on safety. On risk. On moments of crisis and what needs to happen to keep people physically safe.

What we talk about far less is, the grief.

At PEGS, we work alongside parents and carers who love their children deeply, even when their relationship has become unsafe. These parents are not giving up. They are often making the hardest decisions they will ever face, decisions rooted in care, responsibility, and survival.

And those decisions come with profound loss.

Parents tell us about the grief they carry every day. Grief for the family they once knew. Grief for the family society tells them they should be. Grief for their child, for the relationship they hoped to have, and for the future they imagined together.

This grief is complex and often invisible.

For some parents, safety has meant their child can no longer live at home. For others, it has meant limited contact or no contact at all. These outcomes are rarely chosen lightly. They are often reached after months or years of trying to cope, to support, to understand, and to hold things together while living with fear, worry, and emotional exhaustion.

Parenting when you no longer live with your child, or have contact with them, brings a particular kind of pain. Parents continue to worry, to care, and to hope, even when they are no longer part of their child’s day to day life. Many are left carrying constant questions:

Did I do the right thing? Could I have done more? What if things were different?

Even when a parent is now physically safe, the impact of child to parent abuse does not simply end. Trauma does not switch off once a door closes or contact stops. The body remembers. The mind replays. The grief remains. And yet, many parents feel unable to talk about this loss. There can be shame, fear of judgement, or worry about being blamed or misunderstood. Parents are often expected to be endlessly resilient, to cope quietly, to put their own pain aside, and to focus only on their child’s needs. As a result, their grief often goes unseen and unsupported.

But grief does not disappear just because it is unspoken.

Parents grieve not only for what has happened, but for what might have been . For missed milestones. For everyday moments that never came. For the version of family life they worked so hard to create. This loss is real, even though the child is still alive, and it deserves to be acknowledged.

As a society, we need to talk about this more openly.

Child to parent abuse affects whole families, and its impact does not end once physical safety is achieved. Parents and carers need support that recognises the emotional toll, the trauma, and the long-term grief that can follow, including for those parenting from a distance or living with no contact at all.

At PEGS, we believe parents deserve compassion, understanding, and support too. Acknowledging parental grief is not about blame or judgement. It is about honesty, validation, and creating space for parents to be seen and supported.

Distance does not mean a lack of love.

Grief does not mean failure. And no parent should have to carry this alone.

For every parent or caregiver who has had to make some of the toughest decisions to keep everyone safe. I see you and my heart is always with you,

Michelle xx

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS

Invisible No More: Reframing How We Listen, Support and Respond to Older Survivors of Sexual Violence and Abuse

Fri, 16 Jan 2026 11:47:31 GMT

Invisible No More: Reframing How We Listen, Support and Respond to Older Survivors of Sexual Violence and Abuse

It’s often said that society ‘protects the vulnerable’. Yet when it comes to older adults and sexual violence, that protection can be invisible - not because the experiences don’t exist, but because they are too often hidden, misunderstood, or dismissed. The September 2025 roundtable convened by the Older People’s Commissioner for Wales exposed this stark truth: older people experience sexual violence and abuse in all its forms, yet current systems frequently fail to recognise their needs, respond effectively to disclosures, or deliver trauma‑informed support.

Why This Matters

Sexual violence doesn’t age out. Yet cultural assumptions - about age, sexuality, vulnerability, and even consent — shape how professionals, families, and communities perceive older people. These assumptions can silence survivors and shape the systems that should support them.

Participants at the roundtable, researchers, practitioners, and advocates — emphasised that older survivors’ experiences range widely: from long‑buried childhood abuse still casting long shadows, to recent victimisation in care environments, personal relationships, or community settings.

Spotlight: Abuse by Adult Children - An Overlooked Issue

While much of the conversation on older adults and sexual violence focuses on strangers, partners, or institutional settings, abuse by adult children toward their older parents remains largely invisible. This can include emotional, financial, physical, or even sexual harm, and survivors often face unique barriers to disclosure — from shame and fear of retaliation to complex family loyalties.

Bringing these experiences into research, training, and policy is essential. Recognising child-to-parent abuse ensures that safeguarding systems are truly inclusive, that practitioners are aware of all sources of harm, and that older survivors can access support without fear or stigma.

“Older people may suffer abuse from the very people society assumes will protect them. Their voices must be heard.”

But disclosure remains a seismic hurdle . Shame, generations of silence around sexual topics, ageist assumptions that older people are asexual or not at risk, and fear of not being believed all contribute to under-reporting and hidden suffering.

The Reality of Barriers:

Some of the key issues identified include:

Ageist assumptions: Practitioners may unconsciously believe older people don’t have sexual lives, can’t be victims, or are “protected” by their adult children, leading to missed opportunities to ask the right questions or recognise warning signs.

Systemic fragmentation: Safeguarding, health, social care, and violence prevention sectors often operate separately. This can leave older survivors - including those experiencing child-to-parent abuse - bouncing between services, repeating their trauma without meaningful support.

Training gaps: Professionals in frontline roles acknowledge a lack of confidence and training to address the complexity of these cases - especially where factors like dementia, long-term trauma, or family-based abuse are involved.

Data blind spots: The absence of age-specific and disaggregated data means policymakers and service commissioners lack the evidence needed to plan effective responses, including for abuse perpetrated by adult children.

A Human-Centred Lens

What emerged clearly from the roundtable conversations was this: older survivors tell their stories slowly — and often cautiously. They may only disclose through sustained, trusting relationships built over time. Fragmented services that prioritise quick assessments and outputs work against the relational support these survivors need.

Practitioners highlighted how older people may reveal experiences piece by piece. Building trust - listening patiently, without judgment or rushed agendas - is foundational. This approach challenges the traditional “welfare-first” model that assumes vulnerability and incapacity, instead fostering partnership, choice, and agency.

From Awareness to Action

The roundtable didn’t stop at challenges - it sketched a path forward. Some of the crucial areas for action include:

Targeted, lived-experience research to deepen our understanding of older survivors’ needs and what works in practice, including experiences of abuse from adult children.
Centralised, disaggregated data systems that make invisible experiences visible, informing policy and service design.
Awareness and training programmes for professionals, grounded in gerontology, trauma-informed care, and anti-ageism.
Reimagined service pathways that prioritise continuity, relational practice, and accessibility - including one-stop models where medical, psychological, legal, and social support can co-exist.
Communication strategies that speak directly to older adults, using language that resonates, and that reflect their diverse identities and experiences.
Looking Ahead: Addressing Overlooked Experiences:

While the roundtable highlighted many important aspects of older survivors’ experiences - including the lifelong impacts of childhood abuse... ongoing gaps remain. Integrating child-to-parent abuse into research, training, and service design is vital. Recognising these experiences can strengthen safeguarding systems, improve practitioner awareness, and ensure that all survivors’ voices are heard — regardless of the source of harm.

We owe older survivors more than procedural responses. We owe them listening , respect , and systems that reflect the full complexity of their lives, histories, and hopes.

Because ending sexual violence and abuse at any age isn’t just about better services — it’s about affirming dignity, restoring trust, and ensuring no voice remains unheard.

Please note, this blog is based on a summary produced by the Older People’s Commissioner for Wales. It is a free and valuable resource for anyone wanting to learn more about this topic.

You can download the document below to explore the full summary and find out more.

Thriving With ADHD in a Supportive Workplace

Thu, 08 Jan 2026 10:45:50 GMT

Working for PEGS as a CPA Practitioner: Thriving With ADHD in a Supportive Workplace

Working as a CPA Practitioner within PEGS is more than just a job to me. This is a role where I can provide support to parents, carers and parental figures with understanding, empathy and compassion. The role needs emotional resilience, focus and the ability to support those who are in complex situations. As someone who has a diagnosis of ADHD this can easily feel overwhelming at times.

I’m so grateful that PEGS is the kind of organisation that doesn't just recognise neurodiversity - they actively support it! Those who have ADHD will understand that their mind processes information, manages their focus and various responsibilities differently. Since I started my role as a Practitioner I have found that my diagnosis of ADHD brings strengths to my role such as creative problem-solving, high empathy, hyperfocus during parent interactions and a strong desire to advocate for others.

Like any other condition, from time to time there can be challenges such as the occasional mental overwhelm or struggling with time management during fast/busy periods. Having an employer like PEGS acknowledging natural differences makes all the difference to me!

I am provided with clear structure and expectations (supporting me to stay grounded). One of the most supportive aspects of working for PEGS is the trust given to me. From managing my own workload, planning my day to fit in with my concentration rhythm and recognising that giving me flexibility empowers me to be the very best I can within my role.

At PEGS there are always chances for open conversations and supportive management who are always willing to listen and support however they can. There is a culture where conversations around neurodiversity or other personal challenges are encouraged - being able to discuss (with no fear of judgement) what I need to thrive in my role, means I never feel like I'm in my role alone.

Personally I find having streamlined processes and organisation essential. PEGS provides processes in various ways - written or visual and the organisational tools provided such as a rota based system (months in advance) really supports me with keeping myself organised and on task to complete various aspects of my role.

The nature of my role as a Practitioner can be heavy and emotionally intense. PEGS prioritise staff wellbeing providing a daily pop-in to come along and just chat, regular supervision, team meetings and “drop me a message if you need anything” vibe. By having this supportive working environment means I can manage my ADHD without fear or judgement. The nature of a practitioner role can be emotionally intense. PEGS prioritises wellbeing and checks in on staff regularly, making sure we feel supported professionally and personally. This culture of care means I can manage my ADHD without fear of judgement or stigma.

Working for PEGS with ADHD has highlighted to me something I have not seen previously - work inclusion. PEGS management is not about ticking boxes or token gestures. It's about understanding, adapting, trusting and uplifting staff so meaningful work can be done for the parents we support.

I’m proud to work for an organisation that sees my strengths, supports my challenges, and actively helps me succeed in a role that truly matters.

January Schedule, The Start of 2026

Tue, 06 Jan 2026 11:41:29 GMT

January Schedule, The Start of 2026

Throughout January, we’re continuing to run back to our usual opening hours, alongside some exciting programme launches, workshops and new opportunities for professionals!

Weekly Practitioner-Led Support Sessions

Our practitioner-led sessions run every week (Monday - Friday) , providing a safe and compassionate space for parental figures to talk and access support at a pace that feels right for them. These sessions are led by our fantastic team of practitioners

Each week, our sessions are at the following times:

Monday - 12pm-1pm
Tuesday - 11am-12pm and 7pm-8pm
Wednesday - 10am-11am
Thursday - 1:30pm - 2:30pm and 8pm-9pm
Friday - 10am-11am

Wellbeing Wednesday Workshops

Our Wellbeing Wednesday Workshop, led by our fantastic Wellbeing Practitioner. These sessions focus on supporting parental figures by reconnecting to wellbeing strategies, exploring wellbeing and emotional wellbeing.

Wellbeing at PEGS isn’t about “fixing” yourself, it's about feeling supported and empowered. Because you matter too.

EPIC Programmes Launching This Month

January also marks the start of two important EPIC programmes:

EPIC 6-Week Cohort:

Starting Thursday 8th January!

Our full EPIC programme supports parents and carers to better understand child to parent abuse, explore safety and to build confidence and resilience over a six week cohort.

EPIC (Half-Day):

Starting Monday 12th January!

This half day programme provides EPIC for those who may not be able to attend the full six week cohort, while still gaining the meaningful insight, tools and support in the same way as our six week cohort.

Professional Information Session

For professionals wanting to learn more about PEGS, our referral pathways, or opportunities to collaborate, we’re hosting a Professional Information Session on Monday 12th January.

This session is a chance to:

Learn more about child to parent abuse
Understand how PEGS supports families
Explore how we can work together to improve safety and outcomes

Bounce Back, Step Forward Programme

Later in the month, we’ll be launching Bounce Back, Step Forward, starting Monday 26th January. This programme focuses on rebuilding confidence, emotional strength and hope - supporting parents to take steps forward at their own pace.

Training for Professionals

Alongside our free support for parental figures, we’ll also be delivering training for professionals in Shropshire and Warwickshire throughout January. This training helps professionals recognise child to parent abuse which supports families with confidence and care.

We currently have some fully funded training available on our eventbrite

Or for individual training please, visit here.

If you have any questions on group bookings, please contact training@pegsupport.com

Looking Ahead...

We also have some exciting new announcements coming very soon, and we can’t wait to share more with you as the year unfolds.

January is about taking things one step at a time. Whether you join a session, take part in our programmes, attend training or simply read along quietly… You are part of the PEGS community and you are always welcome here.

From all of us at PEGS, we look forward to walking alongside you throughout 2026.

A Year of Growth, Learning and Support at PEGS

Fri, 02 Jan 2026 10:51:49 GMT

A Year of Growth, Learning and Support at PEGS

Standing alongside families experiencing Child to Parent Abuse

As we look back on this year, we feel incredibly proud and inspired by all that we’ve achieved together as a team. 2025 has been a year of learning, connection and meaningful impact for families experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), and for the professionals working hard to support them.

At PEGS, everything we do is rooted in compassion, understanding and the belief that no parent should face CPA alone.

Learning and Growing Together

We believe that knowledge is key to providing safe, effective and compassionate support. This year, our team has invested heavily in learning and development to strengthen how we support families.

Our training has included:

Data Protection
Domestic Abuse Awareness
Safeguarding Children & Adults
BEAT – Eating Disorders
Suicide Awareness Training
Understanding Animal Welfare in Violent Homes
Solution Focused Therapy
Working with Neurodiverse Adults
Clare’s Law
Trauma-Informed Practice
Introduction to Sexual Violence & Abuse
Drug & Alcohol Services within Shropshire
Trustee Recruitment and Succession
Healios Lunch and Learn
Vibrant Workshop – Working with Volunteers
Click, Control, Commercial – Domestic Abuse Training
CCR Network Workshop – Embedding Digital Abuse Prevention Tools
Resolving Conflict at Work & Mediation
Exploitation and Modern-Day Slavery – Adult Safeguarding
Working with Volunteers

Our HR team also completed specialist training to ensure that every part of PEGS remains safe, informed and supportive.

Sharing Knowledge with Professionals

Helping professionals recognise and respond to CPA remains as a key step of our work. This year, PEGS has:

Delivered training to 1,885 professionals
Hosted 12 professional information sessions, supporting organisations to better understand CPA and the families impacted
Supported team members to become PAWS Champions, helping to raise awareness and share best practice

Through this work, professionals feel more confident, informed and better equipped to support families who are and may be experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Connecting, Collaborating and Raising Awareness

This year, we’ve continued to ensure CPA remains part of national conversations. We’ve attended parliamentary events, connected with safeguarding leaders, and contributed as active panel members for DARDR.

We’ve also worked hard to bring CPA out of the shadows through media and storytelling. Our work has featured across:

This Morning, ITV, BBC, TalkTV, Sky, BBC Midlands, Express & Star, The Guardian, Shropshire Star, Yahoo, Metro, Digital Spy, Channel 5 News, BBC Shropshire, Chester & District, Prolific North, The Sun, MSN, AOL, Female First, Newcastle Magazine, alongside podcasts, interviews and online platforms.

We’ve also been proud to work with Hollyoaks on their current CPA storyline with Ste and Lucas.

And of course, our Breaking the Silence Conference brought together lived experience, sector-leading voices and powerful conversations focused on learning, hope and change.

We are proud to receive recognition for our work this year, including awards and lottery funding for the next three years, helping us continue supporting families who are impacted by CPA.

Supporting Parents Experiencing Child to Parent Abuse

You are not alone

Parenting can be incredibly rewarding but for some families, it can also feel frightening and isolating. Parents and carers experiencing CPA often describe feelings of fear, shame, confusion and exhaustion, and many feel unsure where to turn.

At PEGS, we want parents to know: you are not alone, and support is available.

A Safe Space for Emotional and Practical Support

Our services are designed to offer both emotional reassurance and practical guidance, delivered with compassion, without judgement, and at a pace that feels right for each individual.

Support includes:

Practitioner-led drop-in sessions, available Monday–Friday, including two evening sessions per week
One-to-one practitioner support, tailored to parents’ experiences (available in certain funded areas)
Single support sessions and workshops, offering focused advice and guidance
A specialist 6-week Child to Parent Abuse programme, supporting parents to understand behaviour and increase safety at home

All support is trauma-informed and centred around understanding and choice.

Support That Works Around You

We know there’s no single “right” way to access support. Parents can take a flexible, pick-and-mix approach, choosing what feels helpful at different times.

Some parents may attend a drop-in session or workshop, while others benefit from one-to-one support. While one-to-one support is currently available in certain funded areas, all other services are open to any parent or carer, wherever they live.

Parents can move between different types of support as their needs change. There is no fixed pathway, no pressure, and no time limit. Support remains available whenever it’s needed.

Workshops and Peer Support

We also provide:

Wellbeing and resilience workshops, supporting parents to prioritise self-care and manage stress.
Practical tools and techniques to help respond safely.
Skills-based learning to strengthen understanding.
A closed, monitored peer support group, offering a confidential space to feel understood and listened to alongside with like minded parental figures.

Our Impact This Year

Behind every number is a parent who took a brave step toward support.

4,026 referrals received
2,466 parents attended practitioner-led drop-in sessions
2,413 parents accessed at least one practitioner support session
597 parents accessed multiple one-to-one sessions

In 2025 alone, we also had 890 new members in our Peer Support group!

Supporting Families Across the UK

Parents accessed PEGS support from across the country, with the highest number of referrals from:

West Midlands (281)
Derbyshire (249)
Essex (199)
Shropshire (186)
Devon (172)
Cheshire (162)
Greater London (157)
Worcestershire (153)
Staffordshire (145)
Gloucestershire (124)

This reflects both growing awareness of CPA and the continued need for specialist support.

You Are Not Failing - You Are Seeking Support

Many parents worry that asking for help means they’ve failed. In reality, reaching out is an act of strength. CPA is complex, and with the right support, parents can rebuild safety, confidence and connection.

Whether someone attends one session or engages in longer-term support, every step matters.

If you are a parent or carer experiencing CPA, or a professional supporting families, you can:

Make a referral as a parental figure (by clicking here)
Make a referral as a professional (by clicking here)

From everyone at PEGS, thank you for walking this journey with us .

Together, we are creating a safer, more supportive world for families impacted by Child to Parent Abuse.

Christmas and child to parent abuse

Tue, 23 Dec 2025 08:23:50 GMT

Christmas Can Feel Different: Keeping Safe When Child to Parent Abuse Is Part of Your Life

Christmas is often talked about as a happy, family-focused time. But for parents living with child to parent abuse (CPA), it can be exhausting, stressful, and sometimes unsafe.

At PEGS, we know that parents often feel overwhelmed by the pressure to make Christmas “perfect” while trying to stay safe. Long days at home, busy households, and fewer support services can all make things harder. If this is your reality, please know you are not alone — and what you’re feeling is understandable.

Why Christmas Can Be Harder When CPA Is Present

The festive period brings a lot of change. Homes are busier, routines are disrupted, and expectations increase. For children, young people, and adult children who use abusive behaviours, this can sometimes mean aggression, threats, intimidation, controlling behaviour, or damage to property.

Parents often tell us they feel like they are constantly walking on eggshells to keep the peace, particularly when siblings, adult children, or extended family are around. Many feel anxious about how to manage the day, worrying about what might trigger conflict and whether they can even get through the day safely. That fear and uncertainty can make the festive period feel exhausting and relentless.

Christmas Doesn’t Have to Look Like Everyone Else’s

One of the hardest parts of Christmas when living with CPA is the comparison. Social media, family conversations, and advertising can create the impression that Christmas should look a certain way.

But when abuse is part of family life, Christmas may need to look different — and that is completely okay.

This might mean:

Keeping the day quieter with fewer expectations
Shorter celebrations instead of full-day events
Cancelling or changing plans if needed
Focusing on safety and managing the day rather than trying to create the “perfect” Christmas

There is no right way to do Christmas. Protecting yourself and your family comes before traditions, appearances, or what others expect.

Finding Space When Everything Feels Intense

Living with CPA often means feeling constantly on alert. Finding moments of space — physical or emotional — can be vital, especially during the holiday period.

Some parents find it helpful to:

Step outside, even briefly, to breathe and reset
Spend time in a separate room when possible
Reach out to a trusted person to message or call
Reduce noise, stimulation, or demands within the home
Give themselves permission to rest, disengage, or pause

Creating space doesn’t mean giving up. It means recognising your limits and protecting your wellbeing so you can get through the day safely.

A Trauma-Informed Reminder

Child to Parent Abuse does not stop because it is Christmas. Being frightened, controlled, threatened, or hurt in your own home by your child is not “just behaviour” and is not caused by poor parenting.

Many parents carry deep shame and self-blame, particularly at this time of year. Trauma-informed support recognises that parents are often doing everything they can to survive difficult situations with limited help and understanding. You deserve compassion — from others and from yourself.

Support Still Matters, Even During the Holidays

CPA can feel isolating, and Christmas can amplify that sense of being alone. Support is still available and important, especially when the days feel hardest.

Reaching out doesn’t mean you have failed. It means you are trying to protect yourself, your children, and your family.

This Christmas, we hold space for families whose lives don’t match the festive picture. If you are struggling, feeling unsafe, or simply trying to get through the day, we see you, we believe you, and you are not alone.

Expert response to VAWG Strategy

Fri, 19 Dec 2025 11:10:27 GMT

We need to focus on mothers experiencing abuse – Expert response to VAWG Strategy

Michelle John is one of the UK’s foremost experts on Child to Parent Abuse, having launched the social enterprise PEGS in 2020 following her own experience of CPA.

Following the release of the Government’s VAWG Strategy today (18th December), Michelle said:

“Halving violence against women and girls in the next decade is, of course, a hugely admirable target and I sincerely hope the actions laid out in today’s strategy have the desired impact and make a tangible difference in the number of people experiencing abuse each year in the UK.

“We welcome the recognition in the strategy of the impact abuse can have on parents and siblings, and hope to see additional actions focused specifically around Child to Parent Abuse introduced when a definition is set down in 2026. The promised definition will only be the tip of the iceberg when it comes to addressing this type of domestic abuse, which researchers believe affects up to one in every ten households.

“Of the thousands of parents PEGS has supported since March 2020, more than 95% have been women – comprising mostly of mothers but also step-mothers, grandmothers, kinship carers, foster carers and other guardians. We know from research by our board member Dr Amanda Holt that one parricide (where a parent is killed by their child) occurs every 19 days in England and Wales; plus the most recent Femicide Census shows a woman is more likely to be killed by her son than a stranger.

This is not a minor issue, it is a serious form of domestic abuse which has very real physical, emotional, social and financial implications for many thousands of women.

“That’s why hope to see a comprehensive plan put together of how we can all work to reduce the devastating impact of CPA. PEGS will continue to elevate the voices of parents impacted by CPA, and hope to continue providing insights to the Government during the development of the definition and further work undertaken.

“We hope the wider actions set out in the strategy go some way towards supporting those affected by CPA alongside other victims and survivors – but it is also clear that targeted work is needed for those who are experiencing physical, emotional, financial, digital and even sexual abuse at the hands of their child.

“We cannot leave mothers without the proper networks that should be in place for all those experiencing abuse or harm, and at PEGS we welcome any steps forward which open up new support options and increase awareness of their situation.”

PEGS Proudly Announces New IT Support from PCrefurb

Thu, 11 Dec 2025 11:14:19 GMT

PEGS Proudly Announces New IT Support from PCrefurb

We’re always working to make sure parents and carers impacted by Child to Parent Abuse can access the support they need safely, quickly and compassionately. Because we’re an online service, having reliable digital tools isn’t just helpful - it’s essential to the way we work.

That’s why we’re delighted to share that we’ve received generous support from PCrefurb , who have provided us with refurbished laptops and IT equipment to enhance the way we deliver our services.

PCrefurb shared:

“We at PCrefurb are very happy to be able to support the valuable service that PEGS provide across Derbyshire, thanks to the donations of IT equipment that we receive to refurbish and pass on. We wish them every success with the project.”

Who PCrefurb are and the Difference They Make...

PCrefurb is a digital inclusion charity working across Derbyshire and Tameside. Their mission is simple but powerful: to help people access the online world, whatever their circumstances.

They do this by:

Refurbishing and distributing IT devices to individuals and community organisations
Building digital confidence through person-centred training
Providing data connectivity for those who might otherwise be offline

Creating opportunities for volunteers, many of whom face complex challenges themselves, to play meaningful roles in refurbishment, logistics, digital training and governance

Their work brings together social impact and environmental sustainability, reducing waste while opening doors for people who need support the most.

To learn more about the incredible work PCrefurb does, you can visit their website: pcrefurb.org.uk

What This Support Means for PEGS

As an organisation delivering all our support digitally from 1:1 sessions to practitioner led sessions and resources - this equipment will make a real difference in supporting us to carry on delivering our free online services.

The refurbished laptops and IT tools will help us:

Work more efficiently behind the scenes
Reach more parental figures who need our support
Continue providing safe, accessible online sessions
Strengthen our capacity as our team grows

We are truly grateful to PCrefurb for recognising the importance of the work we do and for helping ensure we can keep delivering vital support to families navigating Child to Parent Abuse.

We are incredibly fortunate to be supported by so many wonderful organisations and services who believe in the mission of PEGS.

PCrefurb is a example of how community partnerships can create positive change.

Thank you again to their team and to every person and organisation who stands with us.

16 Days of Activism 2025

Tue, 09 Dec 2025 12:05:30 GMT

16 Days of Activism 2025

Every year, from 25th November to 10th December, communities across the world come together for the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence. It’s a powerful global movement designed to raise awareness, challenge stigma, and encourage positive action to prevent all forms of abuse.

At PEGS, these 16 days offer an important opportunity to highlight an issue that is still too often hidden or misunderstood: Child to Parent Abuse.

For many parents and carers, speaking out about their experiences can feel impossible. Shame, fear of judgement, or simply not knowing where to turn can leave families struggling in silence. By taking part in this campaign, we aim to ensure that no parent feels alone, unheard, or unsupported.

What the 16 Days of Activism Represents

The 16 Days of Activism is an international campaign first launched in 1991. It links two significant dates:

25th November - International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women

10th December - Human Rights Day

These dates underline a simple truth: safety, respect and freedom from abuse are fundamental human rights.

Throughout the 16 days, organisations, professionals, and communities unite to:

Raise awareness
Share stories and lived experience
Provide education and support
Advocate for meaningful change

For PEGS, it is an essential time to help raise understanding of Child to Parent Abuse, ensuring families affected by CPA feel seen and supported.

How PEGS Is Taking Part Across the Country

This year, our team has been involved in a wide range of activities designed to improve awareness, encourage conversation, and provide guidance on recognising and responding to Child to Parent Abuse.

National and Local Events

PEGS have been attending events, delivering workshops, and speaking at conferences throughout the 16 days. These sessions focus on improving understanding of CPA and helping professionals feel confident in supporting families.

Awareness Campaigns:

Our social media channels and website have been sharing daily insights, resources, and information about Child to Parent Abuse. We’re committed to breaking down stigma, increasing understanding, and signposting support for families.

Community Conversations:

We have been connecting with parents, carers, and practitioners across the country, ensuring that the experiences of families affected by CPA are recognised and validated.

Introducing: 16 Voices:

One of the most meaningful parts of our campaign this year is our 16 Voices project.
Across the 16 days, we will be sharing messages from lived experience voices, professionals and organisations who have partnered up with PEGS.

These voices aim to empower families, educate professionals, and help reduce the shame and isolation so many parents feel.

Why This Work Matters

Child to Parent Abuse is more common than many realise, yet it remains one of the least spoken-about forms of abuse. Families often worry about being judged or misunderstood, and many simply don’t know where to turn.

The 16 Days of Activism helps remind us that:

Abuse can affect any family

No parent or carer should feel ashamed

Support exists

Awareness leads to change

By raising the profile of Child to Parent Abuse, we can help ensure early intervention, better understanding and more compassionate responses for families who need support.

This month, we have also held a team meeting and asked each of our team members to share what the 16 Days of Activism means to them.

Some of their responses included:

“Ending male violence”
“White Ribbon is about men standing up against violence towards women”
“Everyone deserves to feel safe online”
“If we don’t talk about it, who will?”

It was a powerful reminder of why raising awareness and having these conversations matters for all of us.

As the 16 Days of Activism comes to an end, our team has learned so much, shared so much, and opened up important new conversations around Child to Parent Abuse and gender-based violence.

We’re grateful for the chance to amplify voices, raise awareness, and continue shining a light on experiences that too often remain hidden.

What have you done to help create change this 16 days?

Could You Support PEGS Instead of Sending Cards?

Tue, 02 Dec 2025 12:41:19 GMT

This Christmas, Could You Support PEGS Instead of Sending Cards?

Every year, many of us buy Christmas cards for friends, colleagues or close connections. It’s a lovely tradition, but more and more people are choosing something that has a longer-lasting impact: donating to a cause they care about.

This Christmas, we would be incredibly grateful if you would consider supporting PEGS. You can help us continue providing free support to families experiencing child-to-parent abuse - something that is far more common than most people realise, and one that can leave families feeling isolated and alone.

A Meaningful Alternative to Christmas Cards.

If you’re thinking about skipping the cards this year or simply want to do something that makes a difference, a donation to PEGS is a thoughtful and impactful choice. Every penny helps us to be there for families when they need us most. There are many different ways you can support us and help us continue providing our free support:

What can you do as an individual?

Make a One-Off or Regular Donation via GoodHub

You can support us with a single donation or set up a regular donation, whatever feels right for you.
GoodHub is a fantatsic way to support PEGS, even if it's donating to our future fundraisers and events, it's a great way to support organisations such as PEGS!

Visit our GoodHub by clicking here .

Raise Free Donations While You Shop

If you’re buying Christmas gifts online, joining EasyFundraising is a simple and easy way to support PEGS at no extra cost. Each purchase you make through the platform generates a small donation for us. This includes anything from Amazon, Clothing retailers, Supermarkets and more!

To access our EasyFundraising please click here.

Or maybe you're a professional?

Swap Corporate Christmas Cards for a Donation That Makes a Difference

Many organisations are choosing to replace printed Christmas cards with a donation to a charity and we’d be honoured if you would consider PEGS.

Choosing PEGS not only supports our work, but also sends a strong message to your clients and partners about your company’s values and commitment to helping families who are experiencing CPA.

How Your Business Can Support PEGS

Make a one-off or corporate Christmas donation
Share a digital message with clients explaining your support
Encourage your staff to join EasyFundraising
Consider PEGS as your chosen charity for 2025

Whether you’re an individual or a business, choosing to donate instead of sending Christmas cards helps us reach more families, expand our services, continue raising awareness of child-to-parent abuse.

Thank you for considering PEGS this Christmas.

Neurodivergence: Supporting Staff in the Workplace

Thu, 27 Nov 2025 13:10:10 GMT

Neurodivergence: Supporting Staff in the Workplace

Working for PEGS is incredibly rewarding, but we also recognise that supporting those affected by Child to Parent Abuse can also be emotionally tough, too. And when it comes to those who have either diagnosed or suspected neurodivergences,

there are additional challenges which they may have to overcome in the average workday.

That’s why providing tailored support for all of our team members is a central part of the way we work. We regularly review what’s on offer to help staff who may have one or multiple diagnoses (or be going through the referral process), not only drawing on best practice and great examples from across the social enterprise and wider business world, but also encouraging team members to feed back on what’s working well and what could be introduced to support them further.

Why is this important?

The term neurodivergence covers a whole range of conditions, all of which result from a difference within the brain which affects how a person thinks, learns or behaves.

Between 3% and 4% of the population is estimated to have ADHD (either diagnosed or undiagnosed) according to NICE.

Data released by The Owl Centre shows 80% of adults assessed for ADHD have never received any workplace support or reasonable adjustments.

There are around 700,000 people diagnosed with autism in the UK (British Medical Association), but University College London researchers say the number if undiagnosed adults is substantial – potentially bringing that total to more than 1.2 million just in England.

The British Dyslexia Association estimates between 10% and 15% of the world’s population has dyslexia.

How can employers support staff?

If there’s one thing we have prioritised when it comes to staff support since PEGS launched, it’s been asking the team what works for them. Everyone has different needs and even people with the same diagnosis will be impacted in differing ways.

That’s why talking to the person (if they are comfortable doing so, and have specifically told you as their employer about their diagnosis) is absolutely crucial. We offer flexible working arrangements, so that people can self-manage their time around any specific commitments like meetings and sessions with parents. This means some people choose to work from home more often, while others like to come into the office every day. For some, longer and fewer days works best, while others prefer to work a traditional 9 to 5.

As far as feasible, we’re also never prescriptive about what tasks teams should complete in what order. Sometimes, it might be easier for people – especially those with ADHD, for example – to work on a specific type of task depending on how they are feeling at that time. So, where we can, we will always empower staff to determine their own schedules.

Support and Empower

Regardless of where and how they work, every team member has access to a health cash plan provided by the lovely people at Paycare. This not only helps with the costs of accessing everyday health treatments and screenings, but also enables them to call a confidential support line free of charge – whatever it is they want to talk about. And they also get access to video and phone calls with a doctor, making it much easier to get an appointment at a time and location to suit themselves.

We’d never claim to get it right all of the time, but we will always try our best!

Sometimes it’s a case of trying different ways of working until we land on a solution that is beneficial for the staff member themselves and for PEGS as a whole. But ultimately, not only do we have a moral duty to effectively support the health and wellbeing of our team members, it also makes sense: adapting to practices which best suit them means we get the very best out of our staff, which means the parents and carers we work with receive the very best support too.

November Spotlight: Gaslighting

Tue, 25 Nov 2025 14:30:16 GMT

November Spotlight: Gaslighting

This month, we’re shining a light on gaslighting - a form of emotional and psychological manipulation that can have a deep and lasting impact, particularly within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA).

Gaslighting often creeps in quietly. It can sound like simple denial or dismissal, but over time it chips away at confidence, self-trust, and a parent’s sense of reality. Within CPA, this behaviour can blend into verbal, emotional, and even coercive or controlling actions - making it incredibly difficult to recognise, especially when it develops gradually.

Many parents we speak to describe feeling like they’re “walking on eggshells” - constantly second-guessing themselves, wondering if they’re remembering things wrong, or questioning if they’re the problem.

Here are a few phrases parents often hear:

“That never happened - you’re just imagining things”

“You’re always overreacting, you’re making it sound worse than it was”

“You’re too sensitive, give yourself a break”

“You’re making a big deal out of nothing”

“You’re crazy, I never said that”

Sometimes, it looks like something physical or verbal happening - maybe an object is broken, or a hurtful comment is made - but when the parent brings it up, it’s completely denied. That denial can leave them questioning their own memory of events.

Other times, a child might tell others, siblings, relatives, even professionals - that the parent is “lying” or “unstable.” This can make it even harder for parents to be believed or get the support they need.

Over time, this kind of manipulation can lead to confusion, anxiety, and isolation. Parents might find themselves apologising all the time, struggling to make decisions, or withdrawing from friends and family because they no longer trust their own judgment.

Sadly, false allegations are something we hear about far too often. Around 82% of parents who come to PEGS tell us they’ve experienced this as part of their journey.

Gaslighting is powerful because it’s not just about one argument or one incident - it’s about slowly eroding someone’s sense of self. It leaves parents feeling unseen, unheard, and unsure of what’s real. When this happens within a family, the emotional toll can be overwhelming.

If any of this feels familiar, it might help to pause and check in with yourself. You might be experiencing gaslighting if you often find yourself:

Constantly second-guessing your own thoughts or feelings
Feeling confused, anxious, or low
Struggling to make decisions or trust your instincts
Apologising frequently, even when you’ve done nothing wrong
Pulling away from people you care about
Feeling like you can’t trust your own memories

If this sounds like you, please know - you’re not alone. Many parents have felt the same way, and there is support available. Reaching out for help can be a really brave first step toward rebuilding your confidence and sense of self.

Sir James Knott Trust funding

Fri, 21 Nov 2025 13:44:10 GMT

Trust funding will help those experiencing Child to Parent Abuse

Tyne and Wear parents experiencing abuse from their children are set receive support thanks to a trust set up in memory of a regional philanthropist.

The Sir James Knott Trust, which works to support charities in the area in honour of the shipping line and coal mine owner, has granted £10,000 to social enterprise PEGS. The money will be used to fund a specialist part-time Child to Parent Abuse Practitioner who can deliver free one-to-one support to those affected by CPA.

This often-hidden form of domestic abuse is thought to impact up to one in ten families, meaning many thousands of Tyne and Wear households could be experiencing behaviours including physical, verbal, financial and digital abuse. Alongside providing professional training and raising awareness, PEGS supports any affected parent, including those whose child is aged over 18.

Those considered high-risk after an initial assessment will be offered tailored support, working with the practitioner to create comprehensive safety plans and implement practical tools and techniques to manage behaviours within the home. The practitioner will also be able to advocate for parents at multi-agency meetings where appropriate, and will provide much-needed emotional support too.

Any parent referred to PEGS is also able to access their private Facebook peer group, daily virtual sessions and bespoke workshops.

Founding Director Michelle John said: “We are very grateful to receive this funding from the Sir James Knott Trust, to enable us to provide this specialised one-to-one support for parents most in need. Our referral numbers are increasing year-on-year, and we know there are many parents out there who really need the kind of support our practitioner will now be able to provide to those at the highest level of risk within Tyne and Wear.

“Some parents find it incredibly difficult to find support, leading to increased feelings of isolation – and sometimes even guilt and blame if they do reach out and find themselves not listened to or believed. It’s fundamental that we hear the voices of those experiencing this often hidden form of abuse, and this grant will help us do exactly that.”

“Sir James Knott Trust is pleased to support PEGS to help parents affected by child-to-parent abuse. This is a hidden issue that can leave families feeling isolated and without support. Through this funding we aim to help PEGS reach more families and bring understanding and hope where it is most needed.” - Jo Curry MBE - Jo Curry, MBE, Trust Secretary

Visit www.pegsupport.co.uk or search PEGS Support on social media to find out more about the social enterprise. Or for more information about the Sir James Knott Trust, visit www.knott-trust.co.uk .

Celebrating International Men’s Day 2025

Wed, 19 Nov 2025 10:43:02 GMT

Celebrating International Men’s Day 2025: Supporting Men and Boys Across Our Communities

International Men’s Day (IMD), observed globally on 19 November, provides an annual opportunity to highlight the positive contributions men and boys make to society while raising awareness of the challenges they face. The 2025 theme, “Supporting Men and Boys,” encourages open, inclusive conversations around wellbeing, masculinity, support, and community.

This year’s theme places a strong emphasis on men’s mental and physical health, championing the importance of reducing stigma and ensuring men feel ableto seek help when they need it. IMD also celebrates positive male role models—those who lead with compassion, empathy, and service.

How PEGS Is Celebrating Men This International Men’s Day

PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support) is marking International Men’s Day 2025 by celebrating men from across the UK and beyond who are creating safer, stronger, and more supportive communities. Through its national platform and outreach, PEGS is showcasing individuals from a wide range of sectors - including social care, education, policing, community development, academic research, journalism, and the charity sector.

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS, said:

"International Men’s Day is an opportunity to recognise the incredible contributions of men who are quietly making a real difference in their communities. From volunteering and mentoring to advocating for mental health and wellbeing, these men show that leadership and compassion go hand in hand. At PEGS, we are proud to champion them and to inspire others to support and uplift the men and boys around them."

This year, PEGS has produced a national list featuring both UK-based and international men who exemplify the IMD theme. Among them are representatives from Brightstar Boxing, Family Lives, Prism Training, Halton Local Authority, Mankind Initiative, ITV News, domestic abuse services, academic institutions, and charitable organisations. Their stories show the positive impact that compassionate male leadership can have on families, services, and communities.

Meet the Men We’re Celebrating for International Men’s Day 2025

We are proud to recognise the following individuals for their contributions, compassion, and commitment to supporting others:

Joe Lockley – Brightstar Boxing
Jez Todd – Family Lives
Jordan Alexander – Prism Training
Warren Betts – Halton Local Authority
Ed Carney – Specialist Domestic Abuse Trainer
Richie Fletcher – Cheshire East DASU
Rasul Freelain – When Lambs Become Wolves
Brent Plant – PhD Student, Roehampton University
Andy Smith – Smash Life
Lee Chambers – Male Allies UK
Simon Franc – Founder of Kulpa
Martin Jones – Sandy Bear
Josh Brooks – ITV News Journalist
Adam Fejfer – The Qube
Matt Collins – MC Events
Stephen Burton-Pye – Paycare
Lee Davies – West Mercia Police
Luke O Driscoll & Marco Mollo – VML
Andy Bunston – The VC Gallery
Tony Gilfillan – Manchester City Council
Mark Brookes MBE – Mankind Initiative
Andy Newman – PEGS Board Member
Sean Warrender – PEGS Volunteer

These men come from all walks of life, but each one plays a significant role in supporting men and boys, challenging stigma, and contributing to safer, happier communities.

Why Celebrating Men Matters

International Men’s Day is an opportunity to grow understanding, break down stereotypes, and strengthen the systems of support that benefit men and boys. When we highlight the work of positive male role models, we:

promote healthier attitudes around masculinity
encourage conversations around mental health
inspire others to give back to their communities
normalise seeking support and connection
celebrate the value of compassion, resilience, and service

At PEGS, we believe that by lifting up these stories, we help foster communities where every man feels able to show vulnerability, access support, and thrive.

Standing Together for International Men’s Day 2025

As communities across the UK host workshops, talks, wellbeing events, and conversations centred around men’s mental health, we are reminded of the power of connection. Supporting men and boys isn't just something we do on one day a year - it’s something we commit to as a collective.

This International Men’s Day, we celebrate the men who make a difference. We thank them for their impact, their compassion, and their commitment to helping others. And as always, PEGS remains dedicated to championing those who work tirelessly to make our communities safer, stronger, and more supportive for all.

PEGS featured in SEN Magazine

Fri, 14 Nov 2025 13:19:00 GMT

This month, PEGS had the privilege of being featured in SEN Magazine, with our founder Michelle John raising a critical question:

“Are we always looking in the right place when it comes to identifying who is at risk?”

The article explores a challenge that is often overlooked: while safeguarding in schools rightly focuses on keeping children safe, who is safeguarding their parents and carers?

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) can affect anyone, regardless of background or circumstances. The Government now recognises CPA as a form of domestic abuse when it involves children aged 16 or above - though in many cases, the behaviours start years earlier.

A Holistic Approach to Safeguarding:

Safeguarding must extend beyond the child. Michelle emphasizes that:

“If we’re not safeguarding parents too, then we’ll never be able to help families take positive steps towards accessing support for CPA.”

By recognising that anyone in a family can be at risk, we can work together to:

Provide parents with the support they need
Reduce the impact of CPA on the child displaying these behaviours
Strengthen family resilience
Ultimately, improve outcomes for the wider community

We continue to champion a holistic view of safeguarding, one where parents and carers are seen, heard, and supported.

To read the full feature and Michelle’s insights, head to:

National Stress Awareness Day 2025

Thu, 06 Nov 2025 13:06:32 GMT

The Weight We Carry and the Importance of Looking After Ourselves

Yesterday was National Stress Awareness Day - a reminder for all of us to pause, take a breath, and think about how stress impacts not just our lives, but also others.

For many of the parental figures we support, stress isn’t just an occasional feeling, it’s a constant state of alertness, worry and emotional exhaustion. When you’re experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), every day can feel unpredictable. The moments of calm can be fleeting, the weight of it all can take a toll on both mental and physical wellbeing.

We know from our research over the years that CPA doesn’t stop when a child turns 18. In many cases, the behaviours can continue and even escalate.

Our data shows:

98% of respondents experience daily verbal abuse.
25% are physically assaulted each month.
91% report property damage.
82% have been victims of false allegations.
47% say their child has also abused a partner.

These numbers aren’t just statistics ,these are families that are needing support.

Stress and Survival

When living in constant tension, your body and mind stay in “survival mode”

You may find yourself feeling constantly anxious, hypervigilant or emotionally 'numb'

For many parents we support this ongoing stress affects sleep, concentration, appetite, and overall health. Without mentioning the huge impact on careers and work life, creating potentially a future financial barrier.

feeling stressed doesn’t mean you’re weak. It’s a normal human response to living in a situation that feels unsafe or overwhelming. But for our parents at PEGS, this is something you experience every day.

Small Steps Towards Wellbeing

Taking care of yourself doesn’t have to mean big changes. Sometimes it’s about finding one small moment of calm.

Here are a few gentle ways to start:

Breathe: Slow, deep breaths can help regulate your body’s stress response. This can be a great opportunity to go outside, in your garden, for a walk or even on your sofa with a brew.

Talk: Share how you're feeling with someone you trust, whether that’s a friend, professional or support group. It isn't always easy to do so, but talking may help you understand yourself more, and also enables others to understand and find the right ways to support you.

Rest when you can: Even short breaks help your body reset. For many families PEGS supports, it may feel as though that there isn't much time for rest. You are always walking on 'egg shells' , you are always feeling like you are on 'edge' or in 'fear'. But finding that small moment, whether that's reading your favourite book, cooking that favourite recipe, or simply listening to music can make you feel more relaxed in some cases.

Remind yourself : You are doing your best in a situation that most people couldn’t imagine.

Not all these from above may 'work', or be safe to do. We all work differently and it's important to realise that we all also experience stress differently. But please know that you are not alone, there are amazing individuals/services who are here to support you.

Stress may be a constant presence right now, but you don’t have to carry it alone.

On National Stress Awareness Day, we want to remind you that your wellbeing matters too. Support is available, and even though it might not take the stress away overnight, taking that first step ... reaching out, talking or simply acknowledging it is certainly that first step.

If you’re a professional, remember that behind every statistic is someone trying to survive and protect their family. Sometimes, what helps most is being met with understanding and belief.

Leading Child to Parent Abuse speaker available for events

Thu, 30 Oct 2025 10:52:59 GMT

Leading Child to Parent Abuse speaker available for events

If you’re hosting an event which requires a speaker on Child to Parent Abuse, then there are few people more highly regarded in the UK than our very own Michelle John.

As Founding Director of PEGS, Michelle has amassed a wealth of knowledge over the past five years, putting her in a position where she’s called upon by everyone from Government departments to producers of national television shows to share her expertise.

Michelle has limited availability due to the demands of leading our social enterprise, which sees her overseeing our parental support and professional training alongside consulting with organisations across the UK and abroad on the topic of CPA. But if you’re able to secure her at your event, then your attendees will be able to hear her talk about the latest research, best practice examples and anonymous case studies – alongside how we can better support parents, carers and guardians going forward.

Given her success in launching and growing PEGS, Michelle is also available to speak about founding a social enterprise and running an organisation having done everything from advising the Home Office on Domestic Abuse Act statutory guidance, to helping shape storylines for BBC’s EastEnders and Channel 4’s Hollyoaks.

Some points to note:

Michelle is happy to share that she launched PEGS based on her own lived experience of CPA and the lack of support she uncovered for parents, but does not publicly discuss the details of her own situation.

Speaking topics can be tailored to suit your event, please specify whether you’d like a broad overview of CPA, a speech on a specific topic (such as safeguarding or experiences of those with adult offspring) or relating to a sector such as social care, education, emergency services or healthcare.

PEGS does not directly support children, so any information shared will be specific to the experiences of parental figures – we do however work closely with organisations who specialise in child-led support, who we can signpost you to in addition.

The team is always happy to share pictures and information about events Michelle has attended across our website and social media, so do let us know about any restrictions such as attendees who do not wish to appear in photos. If your event is open to the public, then we’d also be pleased to share details in advance to encourage attendance.

Please take a look at our downloadable speaker sheet for more information about Michelle’s key achievements, awards and previous media appearances. And if you’d like to find out more, enquire about availability for a specific event or request costings, then you can email admin@pegsupport.com .

Want to find out a little more about our previous work? Feel free to view our Speaker resource:

Service Shoutout: Domestic Abuse Awareness Month

Fri, 24 Oct 2025 10:58:10 GMT

Service Shoutout: Domestic Abuse Awareness Month

October is Domestic Abuse Awareness Month, a time to recognise the impact of domestic abuse, raise awareness and remind each of us that no one should ever have to face abuse alone.

This month holds special meaning for us at PEGS. October is also when we mark #CPAawarenessDay - a day dedicated to shining awareness on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). We chose October for this important awareness day because CPA is a form of domestic abuse.

Domestic abuse is complex. It can happen in all kinds of relationships, including those between children and parental figures. Yet, child to parent abuse is often misunderstood, partly due to the different language and terminology that surrounds it. What we know, though, is that CPA is far more common than many realise - research shows that 1 in 10 families experience child to parent abuse.

We are incredibly lucky to work with so many organisations that share our mission of supporting families, raising awareness and providing safe spaces for people impacted by any kind of abuse. This month gives us the opportunity to talk, have these difficult conversations and to celebrate the work and services of others.

We want to share a number of incredible organisations who dedicate their time, energy and compassion to supporting individuals and families impacted by domestic abuse. Whether by research or direct work, we are inspired by the powerful progress we're making.

Hourglass

Hourglass is the UK’s only charity dedicated to ending the abuse of older people. Their helpline, support, and advice services offer a safe place for older victims and their families to reach out and find understanding and help when they need it most.

wearehourglass.org

Dewis Choice

The service focuses on providing client-led informed choice during all stages of the help-seeking and justice-seeking journey, during crisis incidents, safety planning and recovery. We prioritise a co-ordinated community response and our service is embedded into safeguarding structures within the communities we work in within Wales. We provide intensive support for people aged 60 years and over, including those who identify as LGBTQ+, and those living with dementia. We aim to also to support family members and families of choice, where it is safe to do so. When appropriate we will work with harmers or alleged perpetrators.

Dewis Choice has engaged with over 2,000 people aged 60 years and over.

Disseminated over 5,000 copies of their second edition practitioner guidance.

And have trained over 25,000 practitioners in the UK.

dewischoice.org.uk

Age Cymru

Age Cymru provides vital advice and advocacy to older people across Wales, ensuring they have access to safety, dignity, and support. Their work helps challenge isolation and create safer communities for everyone.

agecymru.org.uk

Family Lives

Family Lives offers support to families navigating difficult situations — from relationship challenges and parental conflict to domestic abuse and safeguarding concerns. Their helpline and online resources give parents and carers a compassionate space to talk and find guidance.

familylives.org.uk

Calan DVS

Calan DVS supports people affected by domestic abuse across South Wales, providing refuge, outreach services, and community-based support. They also work closely with children and young people who have been affected by domestic abuse.

calandvs.org.uk

West Mercia Women’s Aid

West Mercia Women’s Aid offers life-saving services for women and children fleeing or recovering from abuse. Their dedicated team provides refuge, outreach, and emotional support, helping families to find safety and rebuild their lives.

westmerciawomensaid.org

WISH Foundation

The WISH Foundation supports individuals who have experienced trauma or domestic abuse, helping them regain confidence, independence, and self-worth. Their work focuses on empowerment, healing, and community connection.

wishcharity.org.uk

Derbyshire Domestic Abuse Service

Derbyshire Domestic Abuse Service provides free and confidential support to anyone affected by domestic abuse. They offer practical advice, emotional support, and safe accommodation across the county.

derbyshiredomesticabuseservice.org.uk

Warrington Domestic Abuse Service

Warrington’s local domestic abuse service provides one-to-one support, refuge spaces, and community outreach to anyone affected by domestic abuse. Their work helps ensure that no one in Warrington has to face abuse alone.

warrington.gov.uk/domestic-abuse

Cheshire East Domestic Abuse Hub

Cheshire East Domestic Abuse Hub offers advice, information, and support to anyone worried about abuse in their home or relationship. Their team helps people access safety planning, housing advice, and emotional support.

cheshireeast.gov.uk/domesticabuse

We Are Survivors

We Are Survivors (formerly Survivors Manchester) supports male survivors of sexual violence and abuse. Their services include therapy, peer support, and advocacy — all designed to help men heal from trauma and move forward with hope.

wearesurvivors.org.uk

Southall Black Sisters

Southall Black Sisters provides specialist support for women from Black and minority ethnic backgrounds who are experiencing domestic or gender-based abuse. Their work champions equality, justice, and empowerment for all women.

southallblacksisters.org.uk

Sikh Women’s Aid

Sikh Women’s Aid works to end gender-based violence within the Sikh and South Asian communities, offering culturally sensitive advocacy, refuge, and education. Their team creates safe spaces for women to speak out and seek help.

sikhwomensaid.org.uk

Shropshire Domestic Abuse Service (SDAS)

SDAS offers a comprehensive range of support services for individuals affected by domestic abuse in Shropshire. Their services include refuge accommodation, outreach support, advocacy, and a dedicated Children and Young People's (CYP) team. They provide assistance to those seeking to escape or recover from domestic abuse, ensuring safety and empowerment for all involved.

shropsdas.org.uk

Axis Counselling – Shropshire

Axis Counselling provides free and confidential therapeutic support to survivors of sexual abuse, including childhood sexual abuse, sexual assault, and exploitation. They offer services to individuals aged 5 and above, ensuring a safe and non-judgmental environment for healing.

axiscounselling.org.uk

Pathway Project – Staffordshire

The Pathway Project is a Staffordshire-based organisation dedicated to supporting adults, young people, and children who are experiencing or affected by domestic abuse. They offer a 24/7 helpline, refuge accommodation, outreach services, and advocacy, aiming to empower individuals to rebuild their lives free from abuse.

pathway-project.co.uk

Galop

Galop is the UK's leading LGBT+ anti-abuse charity, providing support to LGBT+ individuals who have experienced abuse, including domestic violence, hate crime, and sexual violence. They offer a national helpline, advocacy, and specialist services tailored to the unique needs of the LGBT+ community.

galop.org.uk

ManKind Initiative

The ManKind Initiative is a UK-based charity that supports male victims of domestic abuse. They provide a confidential helpline, information resources, and a directory of local services to assist men in accessing the support they need.

Mankind

Trafford Domestic Abuse Service (TDAS)

TDAS is a registered charity offering support to individuals and families in the Trafford area who are experiencing or have experienced domestic abuse. Their services include community outreach, advice, emotional and practical support, and refuge accommodation, aiming to help individuals achieve safety and independence.

tdas

Staffordshire Women's Aid

Staffordshire Women's Aid has been providing specialist services for victims and survivors of domestic and sexual violence since 1976. They offer a 24-hour helpline, refuge accommodation, outreach support, and advocacy, ensuring that individuals have access to the support and resources they need to escape and recover from abuse.

Staffordshire Women's Aid

Domestic abuse can affect anyone, but so can support.

If you or someone you know needs support, please reach out to one of the incredible organisations above or contact us at PEGS. You don’t have to face it alone.

Domestic abuse affects people in different ways and child to parent abuse is an important but often overlooked aspect of this. This month reminds us all of the importance of raising awareness, connecting families with support and advocating for prevention and intervention.

We are proud to collaborate with these organisations throughout our work and we recognise the difference their work makes in communities across the country.

The team at PEGS thank you all for the hard work and commitment you have for creating change.

PEGS’ Michelle John shortlisted for Social Impact award!

Thu, 16 Oct 2025 10:02:32 GMT

PEGS’ Michelle John shortlisted for Social Impact award

Our Founder Michelle John has reached the finals of a prestigious awards programme which celebrates women who empower others.

Michelle is one of six women shortlisted in the Social Impact Leader of the Year category at the Novi Awards 2025, and one of just 84 female leaders across all categories whose ‘influence, vision and impact’ the judges felt were ‘creating meaningful change across industries, communities, and generations’.

This year marks the 15th anniversary of the awards, with the ceremony being held on Friday 21st November in London, alongside a leadership summit.

Organisers have chosen ‘Power with Purpose’ as 2025’s theme, celebrating women who not only excel in business, but also use their success to dismantle barriers for others – exemplifying the fact that true power comes from using influence to uplift and empower.

This ties in perfectly with Michelle’s reason for starting PEGS back in 2020. Having experienced CPA in her own life, she wanted to ‘turn her pain into power to empower others’.

Novi’s Founder says…

After revealing the finalists, Novi Founder and CEO Griselda Togobo said: “Our 2025 shortlist represents the best of what leadership can be – power used with purpose. These women are not just breaking barriers; they are dismantling them, building bridges, and reshaping what inclusive leadership looks like.

“As we mark 15 years of the Novi Awards, it’s powerful to see past winners return as mentors, judges, and even sponsors – a true demonstration of progress and of women paying it forward.”

Michelle says…

“I’m delighted to have been recognised among a list of truly inspiring women whose work quite literally changes lives every day. It might sound cliché, but it’s the absolute truth that none of what PEGS does would be possible without not only my incredible team, but also the thousands of parents who turn to us for support. PEGS is about them, and for them – the reason we work so hard every day, in order to ensure they feel heard, believed and empowered.

“I always wanted to turn my own experience into something positive and empowering for others – so being shortlisted for the Novi Awards in a year when the theme aligns so perfectly with my personal mission is extra special.”

About Novi

Novi’s mission is to elevate women’s voices and amplify their impact. Its global membership spans both private and public sectors, including some of the world’s biggest organisations. As part of the organisation’s commitment to recognising excellence, their annual flagship event, The Novi Awards, celebrates women breaking barriers and shaping a more inclusive future of business.

You can find the full shortlist here , and be sure to follow PEGS on social media for updates about the awards ceremony itself!

Child to Parent Abuse highlighted by ITV’s This Morning

Thu, 09 Oct 2025 10:35:00 GMT

Child to Parent Abuse highlighted by ITV’s This Morning

One of the key aims of PEGS since the very beginning has been to highlight the issue of Child to Parent Abuse among the general public, given it has traditionally been such a hidden topic. By educating people about CPA, we can hopefully inspire more understanding and support – and it also enables those who are experiencing this type of abuse to realise they are not alone.

So, we were really pleased when the producers of ITV daytime programme This Morning contacted us to ask if our Founder Michelle John would like to appear on the show, alongside a parent – who went by the pseudonym Juliet in order to remain anonymous.

Juliet shared with presenters Cat Deeley and Ben Shephard how her daughter had begun displaying verbal and physical aggression towards her soon after starting senior school, including an incident where Juliet’s fingers were broken.

We were really heartened by Cat and Ben’s clear sympathy for Juliet and her situation, and their sensitive interviewing of her – which echoed the thoughtfulness shown by the whole ITV team as they endeavoured to ensure the topic was presented in an appropriate way.

As has been the case whenever we have worked with the media to highlight CPA, there were a small number of negative comments on social media in the hours and days following. Whilst it’s always disheartening to read such responses, we realise more often than not this comes from a place of not understanding the issue – which highlights why media attention is so necessary.

Many people often want to seek answers as to the ‘cause’ of CPA – when in reality, this is never something we could get to the core of during a short television segment. Triggers, risk factors and underlying causes are often complex, and there is rarely one obviously identifiable cause.

But, as we always say, no matter what may be behind the behaviours that a parental figure is experiencing – it’s important that they know PEGS is here to support them. No matter why, what, how, when or when, we are here for every parent who faces CPA in their home. We hear you, we believe you, and we will always advocate for you.

If you didn’t see the segment on the day and would like to watch it back, you can do so by clicking here.

Please be aware the clip contains detailed and potentially triggering information about Juliet’s experiences of physical and verbal abuse.

New guide to tackle tech abuse of older people

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 14:20:51 GMT

Free practitioner guide

A new guide has been launched to help tackle the growing threat of domestic abusers using technology, like smart doorbells and mobiles, against older people.

Developed by Aberystwyth University researchers, Dyfed-Powys Police, and Parental Education Growth Support (PEGS), the resource for staff on the frontline highlights the growing threat of the use of new technology to abuse over 60 year olds.

Recent Dyfed-Powys Police data shows that between May 2024 and April 2025, over 950 domestic abuse-related crimes involved older victims. More than 10% of these cases were linked to technology such as mobile phones, social media and online banking.

Meanwhile, evidence gathered by PEGS shows that 14% of the older parents they supported had experienced digital abuse from children or grandchildren.

The new guide includes advice on practical ways to prevent technology abuse, such as how to prevent stalking via mobile phone tracking, secure access to bank accounts and lock smart devices.

Funded by the National Lottery Community Fund, the new toolkit draws on police data, victim insights, and real-life case studies to show how perpetrators misuse everyday technologies to monitor, control, exploit and intimidate older victims.

One case involves 67-year-old Keith, a terminally ill man, whose adult son spent over £20,000 of Keith’s money without permission using his smartphones and online shopping accounts.

Another case highlights Katherine, who was stalked, harassed and coercively controlled by her partner using a fake Facebook profile, a mobile tracking app and a Ring doorbell camera, alongside hundreds of abusive calls and messages.

Based at Aberystwyth University’s Centre for Age, Gender and Social Justice, the Dewis Choice Initiative supports older victims of domestic abuse. It combines direct service delivery with ground-breaking research and is the first long-term study exploring decision-making in later life.

Rebecca Zerk, Co-lead of the Dewis Choice project at Aberystwyth University said:

“As more services shift online, increasing numbers of older people rely on family members or caregivers to manage digital tasks on their behalf. Without direct control over their online accounts, older adults can be at heightened risk of exploitation by the people closest to them. This dependency can leave older people at increased risk of financial abuse, fraud, identify theft, and coercion.

“Additionally, limited exposure to technology, lower confidence in navigating digital tools, and unfamiliarity with online risks can expose older adults to risks such as scams, fraud, and technology-facilitated abuse.

“Frontline staff and practitioners and the criminal justice system are increasingly aware of the role of technology in facilitating domestic abuse. However, the nature and impact of technology-facilitated abuse on older victims remains underexplored. This guide aims to address this gap and brings together knowledge, insights, and data from our partners. We really hope this guide can help protect older people from this risk of harm.”

Dyfed-Powys Police serves Carmarthenshire, Ceredigion, Pembrokeshire and Powys and is the largest geographical policing area in England and Wales. Covering more than 515,000 people, almost half of the total resident population is aged 45 and over, and 22% are aged over 65.

Allan Rush from Dyfed Powys Police added:

“Technology-enabled abuse poses a growing threat to older people who may be less familiar with digital tools, making them vulnerable to manipulation. From online scams and phishing attacks to remote surveillance and financial exploitation, perpetrators can use smartphones, social media, and smart home devices to control, deceive, or isolate older individuals. The digital divide often leaves older people without the skills or support to recognise or report abuse.

“One challenge for Police and frontline professionals is keeping up to date with this rapidly evolving technology and how its misuse could lead to the abuse of those in need of safeguarding.

“This guide will be a valuable resource for practitioners who may not be tech specialists by equipping them with the knowledge and tools to identify, respond to, and prevent digital forms of abuse.”

Michelle John, Director of PEGS added:

"At PEGS, we see first-hand how technology can be used to extend patterns of abuse, including cases where parents and grandparents are exploited by those closest to them. The rise in technology-facilitated abuse against older people is a growing concern, and this guide provides frontline professionals with the tools and knowledge to respond effectively. By sharing evidence and practical strategies, we can ensure practitioners are better equipped to recognise digital abuse and protect victims from further harm."

The guidance – Supporting Older Victims of Technology-Facilitated Domestic Abuse – is available to professionals via the Dewis Choice website.

Or by downloading the guide below

September Spotlight - Economic Abuse

Fri, 26 Sep 2025 14:53:21 GMT

September Spotlight - Economic Abuse

We understand that abusive behaviours can take many forms and economic abuse is one that often goes unnoticed, especially when it occurs in the context of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). While financial control is commonly associated with economic abuse, our recent survey shows that it can be far more subtle and damaging, affecting independence, health and everyday life.

What Can Economic Abuse Look Like in CPA?

Economic abuse isn’t just about money. It’s about control, restriction and interference with someone’s ability to access essential resources. In CPA, this can include many examples:

Controlling finances : Your child may demand access to bank accounts, dictate spending or restrict money, leaving you unable to manage bills, rent or essential purchases such as food, heating, electricity and bills.
Restricting employment or work opportunities: Some parents report that abusive behaviour from their child interferes with their ability to maintain a job, either through direct disruption, threats, or emotional pressure. This causes many aspects that impact working life. Many of PEGS’ parents have said they often call in sick after an incident, or don’t show up to work at all. This does not include the impact to the parents productivity at work.
Hiding or controlling access to essential items: Medication, mobility aids or even food and water may be withheld or hidden to exert control. Some parents have described situations where their child would hide medication, or even swap it around for others.
Limiting access to household resources: Utilities, transport and other everyday necessities may be sabotaged or restricted, making day to day life a challenge. This can even be mobile phones and electrical devices, which is intended to stop parents from reaching out for support or asking for help.
Manipulating financial dependence: Your child may demand cash for their personal use. For many of our parents this is simply not just a ‘choice’, as saying ‘no’ often comes with consequences or an incident.

Economic abuse in CPA often merges with other forms of abuse, amplifying its impact.

Our latest report reveals that 82% of parents experiencing CPA are subjected to financial control from having money taken or withheld, to being told how every penny can be spent. Alongside this 69% of parents told us their child has stolen from them. Economic abuse is one of the most hidden but devastating parts of Child to Parent Abuse, leaving families feeling powerless with no control.

Recognising Economic Abuse is the First Step

It’s important to recognise that economic abuse doesn’t have to be overt to be harmful. Even seemingly small actions, like your child insisting on controlling daily spending or withholding support for essential items, can create significant stress and long-term barriers for parental figures.

Understanding the signs of economic abuse in CPA helps parents and professionals respond effectively, seek support and protect wellbeing. We are committed to helping families identify, address and prevent all forms of abuse, because everyone deserves to feel safe and independent in their own home.

If you recognise any of these behaviours in your own experience, you are not alone. We are here to talk. We are by your side.

We offer guidance, support and many free resources for parental figures who are affected by CPA, including those facing economic abuse.

For more information and support, you can visit our website feel free to contact us through social media or email: admin@pegsupport.com

Be Part of #CPAawarenessday - Download Our Free Social Media Templates

Thu, 25 Sep 2025 12:14:31 GMT

Be Part of #CPAawarenessday - Download Our Free Social Media Templates

Are you joining us this October for #CPAawarenessday?

Whether you’re attending our Breaking the Silence Conference in person, or supporting from far, we’d love for you to get involved!

This year, we’ve created free, downloadable social media templates to help raise awareness of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). By sharing them, you’ll be adding your voice to the movement and showing families that they are not alone.

Choose your template and get involved:

Not attending the conference?
You can still stand with us. Download and share our CPA Awareness Day template to show your support and help spread the word.

Already secured your ticket?
Download our “I’m Attending” template and let others know you’ll be with us on the day. Tag PEGS in your post and you could even win a free 1-hour webinar, delivered just for you or your team.

Why it matters?

Every share, every post and every conversation makes a difference. Child to Parent Abuse remains under-recognised and under-discussed... but together, we can change that.

By joining in online via your socials, you’ll be helping us raise awareness, reduce stigma, and bring more families into the light of support.

There are only 19 days to go until #CPAawarenessday . Let’s make sure the voices of families are heard.

Download your templates now, share on your channels, and don’t forget to tag us and use our hashtags!

Together, we can keep Breaking the Silence.

#BreakingTheSilence #CPAawarenessday #StandWithPEGS #ChildtoParentAbuse

Service Shout out: Surviving Economic Abuse - SEA

Tue, 23 Sep 2025 10:40:31 GMT

Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA)

We often hear from parents who tell us they feel trapped. Trapped not just by the behaviour of their child, but by the circumstances around them.

For many, one of the biggest barriers to seeking support or making changes is money. Without financial security, options are limited. Choices feel out of reach, and this is exactly why the work of Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA) is so important in helping those who experience economic abuse.

SEA is the only UK charity dedicated to raising awareness of economic abuse and supporting victim-survivors to live free from it. Their vision is a world in which all women and girls can live their lives free from economic abuse and their work touches every corner of society, from supporting individuals one-to-one to influencing government policy.

What is economic abuse?

Economic abuse is a form of control that can be difficult to spot from the outside, but the effects are profound. For some, It might look like:

Being prevented from working or studying
Having wages, benefits, or savings taken away.
Being forced to take out credit, or having debt built up in your name.
Being denied access to food, clothing, transport or other essentials.
Having financial decisions monitored or controlled.

We know that for many parents experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), these patterns also exist... alongside so many others.

Economic Abuse is huge, and many individuals are unable to recognise it.

We regularly speak to parents who tell us their child has taken control of their bank card, pressured them into handing over money, or left them fearful of what might happen if they say “no”

In fact, in our most recent report 82% of PEGS' parents experience Financial control, while a shocking 97% experience coercive and controlling behaviours.

Why SEA’s work matters

Economic abuse doesn’t end when the immediate abusive situation ends. Its impact lingers and is long term, damaged credit ratings, lost jobs or years of financial instability. This makes it harder to rebuild, and harder to heal.

That’s why SEA’s work is so important.

Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA)...

Raise awareness of economic abuse, helping professionals and the public to recognise the signs

Support victim-survivors through practical guidance, resources, and their Financial Support Line (delivered in partnership with Money Advice Plus)

Drive systemic change , working with banks, businesses, and policymakers so that systems support, rather than penalise, those impacted

Campaign for legal reform , ensuring the voices of victim-survivors shape the laws that protect them.

This holistic approach means that someone who has experienced economic abuse isn’t just supported in the moment but they’re also less likely to face the same barriers in the future.

Working together to break cycles of abuse

At PEGS, we believe that no one should have to be left in silence, whether through CPA or other forms of abuse. We also know that breaking free from abuse is rarely as simple as it sounds - especially when financial control is part of the picture. That’s why we’re proud to highlight SEA as part of our Service Shoutout this month.

Together organisations like SEA and PEGS create a network of support, each tackling a different piece of the puzzle. Because when it comes to abuse, the more we raise awareness, the more we empower people to name it, challenge it and seek support.

Find out more

If you or someone you know might be experiencing economic abuse, SEA’s website is full of practical advice, resources and signposting: Surviving Economic Abuse .

As always, if Child to Parent Abuse is something you’re experiencing, PEGS is here to listen and support. You don’t have to go through this alone.

Fully Funded CPA Training for Professionals in Shropshire

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 11:01:26 GMT

Fully Funded CPA Training for Professionals in Shropshire

At PEGS, we know just how important it is for professionals to feel confident and equipped when supporting families who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). That’s why, with huge thanks to Shropshire Council, we’re delighted to be able to provide fully funded training sessions to professionals across the county.

These sessions are designed to provide you with practical tools, deeper insights and confidence to respond effectively to families impacted by CPA. Whether you work in health, education, social care, early help, or the police/criminal justice sector - or another area where families are supported, this is an opportunity to strengthen your practice and make a real difference.

“One of the best trainings I have attended, facilitators so relatable, knowledgeable and made a difficult subject non triggering. Fantastic day of learning....THANK YOU”
-Previous participant

Who can attend?

This training is exclusively for professionals working in Shropshire (outside of Telford & Wrekin). Priority will be given to frontline workers in:

Health
Education
Social care
Early help
Police/criminal justice

When are the sessions?

In-Person (Full Days):

10th November
15th December
10th February
11th March

In-Person (Half Days):

28th January
17th February

Online (Full Days):

28th October
13th January

Online (Half Days):

6th November
2nd December
8th January
3rd March

Why attend?

By joining us, whether in-person or online - you’ll be contributing to breaking the silence around CPA, helping to ensure families across Shropshire are listened to, believed and better supported.

Spaces are limited and filling quickly, so don’t miss your chance to be part of this important training.

If you have any questions about our fully funded training, or would like to find out more, please get in touch with us at admin@pegsupport.com – we’d love to hear from you.

Are you joining us?

Book your space today y clicking here

Big News: Online Tickets Now Available!

Fri, 12 Sep 2025 11:31:40 GMT

Exciting News!

The body content of your post goes here. To edit this text, click on it and delete this default text and start typing your own or paste your own from a different source.

Femicide Census Blog

Tue, 09 Sep 2025 11:50:23 GMT

Women more likely to be killed by their son than a stranger

*Trigger warning: This blog shares information from a report relating to murders and manslaughters, specifically about those killed by their son*

A new report highlights that female murder victims are more likely to be killed by their son than a stranger.

The Femicide Census, which looks at all femicide cases in the UK in 2022, shows that of the 121 women killed by a man during that year there were 12 where their son was subsequently identified as the perpetrator and was charged with murder or

manslaughter.

This is more than the number who were killed by a complete stranger (11). In addition, there were three grandmothers killed by their grandsons during 2022.

The overall picture:

The Femicide Census has recorded information about femicides since 2009, during which time there have been between 112 and 168 cases a year.

Looking globally, the United Nations reports that nearly 89,000 women and girls were killed intentionally across the world in 2022, representing the highest annual number recorded in the past 20 years. This is despite a drop in the overall number of homicides.

Breakdown by police force:

Of the total of 121, the police force which recorded the highest number of femicides was the Metropolitan Police (25), followed by Scotland (9), West Yorkshire (8), and Merseyside (8). However, when the figures are adjusted to take account of the

number of people living in each force area, the forces recording the highest rate of femicides per 100,000 residents were Merseyside, Gloucestershire, Dyfed-Powys and West Yorkshire.

Previously reported abuse:

Including the 12 mothers and 3 grandmothers, a total of 56 victims knew their killer. Of the 56, 17 had previously reported abuse to the police and 13 had disclosed abuse to friends and family.

The most commonly reported types of abuse were emotional and psychological (occurring in 53% of cases), coercive control (41%), physical (27%) and threats (26%).

Ages:

A total of 24 of the women (amounting to 20% of the cases recorded) were aged 66 or older when they were killed, including all three of the women killed by their grandsons and seven of the women killed by their sons.

In terms of those convicted of murder or manslaughter, the majority were aged between 20 and 59 when the crime occurred – although one was under 19 and two were in their 80s.

To read the full report, head to the Femicide Census website where you can also find out more about why this annual data review is undertaken.

As always, the thoughts of our team at PEGS are with those 121 women (whose names are listed at the beginning of the Census) and their loved ones. Each name reflects a person with a life, a family, friends – some of whom had previously reached out for support, some of whom had kept their abuse hidden or had found themselves unexpectedly the victim of a fatal attack. All of whom deserved a chance to live.

September at PEGS

Mon, 01 Sep 2025 10:46:19 GMT

September at PEGS

Weekly Practitioner-Led Sessions
Our practitioner-led sessions run every week at different times, so you can join when it works best for you:

Mondays: 12pm- 1pm
Tuesdays: 11-12pm & 7-8pm
Wednesdays: 10-11am
Thursdays: 1:30pm–2:30pm and 8-9pm
Fridays: 10am–11am

Wellbeing Wednesday Workshop
First Wednesday of the month | 12:30pm–1:00pm
A short, uplifting workshop to focus on you and your wellbeing.

Professional Information Session
First Monday of the month | 10am–11am
For professionals looking to better understand Child to Parent Abuse and how to support families.

Programmes & Events This Month

EPIC Programme : Thursday 18th September – Thursday 23rd October
Free New Child to Parent Abuse Project : 9th September
Bounce Back Step Forward : 22nd September and 29th September (2-part session)
Full-Day Training : 30th September

Showcase Your Work At Breaking The Silence

Thu, 28 Aug 2025 10:59:23 GMT

Showcase Your Work at Breaking the Silence 2025

We believe real change happens when voices and professionals come together. It isn’t just about listening, learning and collaborating, it’s about creating space for organisations to showcase their work, connect with others, and be part of a growing community driving awareness and change around Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) and Safeguarding.

CPA is still one of the least understood forms of domestic abuse and yet it affects atleast 1 in 10 families within the UK. Parental figures often feel silenced, professionals sometimes feel unsupported, and systems can struggle to respond.

Breaking the Silence is about challenging that narrative to create that much needed change.

This event will bring together leading voices in safeguarding, social work, policing, education, health and beyond, alongside parents who are also professionals, carers, and lived experience voices. Together, we’ll explore fresh research, practical strategies, case studies and the reality of supporting families impacted by CPA. By sharing insights across a multi-agency lens, the day will strengthen collective understanding and encourage real, tangible change in practice.

Who will be in the room?
You’ll find over 150 delegates representing frontline services, academics, safeguarding leads, policymakers, practitioners and charities - who are all passionate about strengthening responses to CPA.

This is your chance to connect with those shaping practice at local and national levels.

What exhibitors gain
Alongside access to all the rich learning from the day - including four optional workshops, exclusive research insights, take-away resources and even a revolving podcast, exhibitors will benefit from:

A dedicated space at the conference to share your services, resources and impact
Your organisation featured on our digital platform, alongside access to all other PEGS conferences
Direct connections with frontline professionals and key decision makers
Extended visibility before, during and after the event by being featured in our delegate handbook

Access to all previous PEGS content, including all conferences, resources and research

We know it can sometimes feel daunting to attend a large event on your own. That’s why we’ve introduced a brand new option: when you buy your ticket, you can now add a colleague, peer or partner organisation to join you on the day for just an extra £20 (which is only applicable to those with expo spaces, and this only includes one extra space)

Why exhibit?
Because being visible at Breaking The Silence is more than just getting your organisation out there, it’s about being recognised as an organisation that’s actively part of the movement to break the silence around CPA. Exhibiting places your work directly in front of professionals and decision makers who are shaping safeguarding responses today. It’s a unique opportunity to showcase how your services, resources and expertise can support families and strengthen systems.

This event is more than a conference - it’s about community, collaboration and change. By joining us as an exhibitor, you’ll be helping to build momentum, amplify parental voices and push forward the urgent conversations that need to happen.

Spaces are limited and filling quickly.

If you’d like to secure your exhibitor spot, please contact us today at admin@pegsupport.com

Service Shoutout: Hub of Hope

Fri, 22 Aug 2025 09:22:14 GMT

This Months Service Shoutout: Hub of Hope

We know how important it is to feel like you’re not alone when looking for any kind of support. Reaching out can feel daunting and sometimes the hardest part is knowing where to even start. But if you are already reaching out for support, whether it's for you or someone you know, please know that it can make the biggest of differences.

This month’s Service Shoutout goes to Hub of Hope!

What is Hub of Hope?

Provided by national mental health charity, Chasing the Stigma , the Hub of Hope is the only directory of its kind in the UK that brings local, national, peer, community, charity, private and NHS mental health support services together in one place.

Tens of thousands of services are listed on the Hub of Hope, with numbers growing every day. It is free to use and available on desktop and from the App Store and Play Store . It is also free for organisations to register their details.

Each year +300,000 people find help for themselves and others via the Hub of Hope - you can too.

Why it matters

So often, parental figures we support tell us they didn’t know where to start, or they felt lost in a sea of information or mis-judgment. The Hub of Hope takes away some of that, giving people a clear starting point and connecting them with trusted services quickly.

No matter your age, your situation, or the type of support you’re searching for, there’s something there for everyone, no matter who you are. And with almost a million individuals already signposted to support since 2017, it’s clear just how much of a difference Hub of Hope is making.

At PEGS we regularly turn to Hub of Hope because the resources and information they provide are both inspiring and incredibly practical. Whether you’re simply wanting to learn more about mental health, or you’re looking for somewhere to reach out to, their website has so much to offer.

On top of that, their service directory makes it easy to search and filter through organisations so you can find the support that feels right for you.

How to Access Hub of Hope

Visit their website: hubofhope.co.uk
Or download the app (iOS and Android) to keep support at your fingertips ( you will find this in the app/play store)

Share it with a friend, family member or colleague - you never know who might need it

We’re so grateful to the team behind Hub of Hope for creating such a life-changing tool for so many. It’s a reminder that, even on the hardest days, support is out there alongside hope.

August Spotlight: Verbal Abuse

Tue, 19 Aug 2025 12:03:31 GMT

When Words Hurt – Facing Verbal Abuse from Your Child

There are few things more emotionally painful than hearing cruel, dismissive or demeaning words from your own child. Whether they’re still under your roof or are well into adulthood, being spoken to in a verbally abusive way by the very person you raised with love and care can leave parents feeling confused, heartbroken and alone.

It's not something we often talk about openly. Parents may fear being judged or blamed or they may question whether their experience is even valid. But verbal abuse from a child whether they’re 14 or 40 - is real and it matters. If you’ve found yourself on the receiving end of shouting, insults, blame or emotional manipulation from your child, this space is for you.

You are not alone.

Verbal abuse can take many forms and not all of them are loud or obvious. Some common examples include:

Repeated criticism or personal attacks
Name-calling, sarcasm or mockery
Shouting or aggressive tone
Gaslighting or manipulation (“You’re imagining it” / “You always make it about you”)
Blame-shifting and emotional guilt trips
Intimidating silence or threats

These behaviours, especially when ongoing, can leave emotional bruises that are hard to explain to others or even to ourselves.

For many parents, the verbal abuse doesn’t start all at once. It might begin as eye-rolling, snide remarks or even sudden mood swings. But over time, those moments become more frequent, more intense, more targeted. The home no longer feels like a place of peace. Interactions start to feel unsafe.

“She speaks to me like I’m her enemy. I raised her with love, but now I feel like nothing I do is ever right in her eyes”
-Mum to a 17-year-old daughter

“I dread phone calls from my adult son. He rings only to shout and unload on me. I hang up shaking every single time”
-Dad of a 33-year-old son

“My teenager calls me names I wouldn't repeat in front of anyone. It’s like living with someone who hates me,I feel ashamed saying that”
- Parent of a 15-year-old

“I never thought I’d have to protect myself emotionally from my own child. But here I am trying to keep my boundaries and stay sane”
- Mum to a 28-year-old daughter

These words reflect a growing reality for many families... a reality that often gets hidden behind closed doors.

When verbal abuse comes from a stranger it’s unpleasant. When it comes from your own child , the one you’ve fed, cared for, worried over, and loved unconditionally - it can feel like a betrayal.

Parents often experience a mix of emotions:

Shock and disbelief – “How did it get to this?”
Shame – “Am I the only one dealing with this?”
Guilt – “What did I do wrong?”
Fear or anxiety – Dreading the next conversation or interaction
Loneliness – Feeling unable to share the experience without judgement

You may also feel torn between wanting to keep the connection and needing to protect your emotional wellbeing.

It’s often assumed that once children reach adulthood, their relationship with their parents will naturally shift into one of mutual respect. But this isn’t always the case. Some adult children continue (or begin) to speak to their parents in ways that are controlling, hurtful or emotionally volatile. These interactions may be laced with some kind of resentment, blame for past decisions or expectations of endless emotional or financial support.

In these situations, many parents struggle with a sense of powerlessness. After all, you can’t “ground” a 30-year-old. But your emotional safety still matters and it’s okay to acknowledge when something isn’t right.

You can love your child deeply and still feel the pain of being treated unkindly.

You can want healing and still need space.

You can seek support without shame.

Even in the face of verbal abuse, your worth as a parent does not diminish. You are still deserving of respect, of peace and of a life where you’re not walking on eggshells in your own home or heart.

If your child is speaking to you in ways that hurt. If you feel exhausted, blamed or disrespected, you are not overreacting. If you find yourself dreading their calls or presence, you are not alone.

You can love your child and still take care of yourself.

You are worthy of respect. You are allowed to feel safe. And you are not alone.

South Asian Heritage Month

Fri, 15 Aug 2025 12:40:57 GMT

South Asian Heritage Month

South Asian Heritage Month, observed annually from July 18 to August 17, has the theme "Roots to Routes" for 2025. This theme emphasizes the connection between South Asian heritage and the journeys, both literal and metaphorical, that individuals and communities have taken to arrive at their current circumstances. It encourages reflection on the past, the present, and the future, acknowledging how our origins and experiences shape our identities.

South Asian Heritage Month is a reminder to us all that heritage is not just about the past... It's about how those stories empower us to create safer and stronger futures.

The month encourages us not only to embrace cultures through art, food, music and storytelling - but also to listen to the lived experiences of South Asian families and communities who have carried traditions, hopes and resilience across generations.

At PEGS, we know that culture, heritage and identity can have a huge influence on how families experience and navigate Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA). Support isn’t always one size - fits all, it must be trauma-informed and respectful of each person’s lived experience. Thats why here at PEGS we signpost and work with some of the most incredible grass roots, specialist organisations such as:

- Yuvanis Foundation in Oldham, whose Women’s, Youth, and Men’s Hubs provide community wellbeing services rooted in cultural understanding, bridging gaps with fitness, peer support and belonging.
-The South Asian Heritage Trust , whose “Roots to Routes” celebrations and creative programming empower individuals and communities to share their journeys with pride and resonance.
- The Sharan Project founded in 2008 is a U.K based charity providing support and advice to vulnerable women, particularly of South Asian origin, who have been or are at risk of being disowned due to abuse or persecution.
- Southall Black Sisters highlight and challenge all forms of violence against women and girls, empowering them to gain control over their lives & assert their human rights to justice, equality and freedom.

This month shows just how powerful connection can be, especially when it’s rooted in heritage and shared across generations.

In 2024, Polly Harrar Founder, CEO of The Sharan Project wrote a piece ’The hidden truth of child to parent abuse within South Asian families’ which you can read by visiting here .

If you'd like to share your heritage story response to “Roots to Routes,” or highlight any other organisations who have done any vital work this month, we’d love to listen at: media@pegsupport.com

Adult Child to Parent Domestic Abuse Webinar

Thu, 14 Aug 2025 14:25:34 GMT

Adult Child to Parent Domestic Abuse Webinar

Central North West London NHS Trust are hosting a webinar event on Adult Child to Parent Domestic Abuse on Wednesday 27th August, 12:30–2:30pm.

This event is being held to shine a light on this often-overlooked form of domestic abuse which presents distinct challenges and risks, particularly due to the unique dynamics involved. As research and practice in this area continue to develop, it is crucial that we deepen our understanding and strengthen our practice responses to this form of domestic abuse.

At the event will involve the wonderful Michelle John, founder and director of PEGS who will be presenting on their recent report on adult child to parent domestic abuse and Equality Collabs who were recently commissioned by MOPAC to conduct a review into adult child to parent abuse, along with contributions from CNWL.

This webinar will provide a valuable opportunity to hear from leading voices in the field and explore how we can work together to improve support for families affected by this complex form of domestic abuse.

To join the event, please click the link below, or get in touch ( h.thomas12@nhs.net ) and we’ll be happy to send you the invite directly. We also ask for you to share this invitation across your networks as the event is open to all partner agencies!

Help Shape Support for Families Affected by Serious Youth Violence

Mon, 11 Aug 2025 08:47:43 GMT

Help Shape Support for Families Affected by Serious Youth Violence

Call for Parents and Carers to Take Part in Research

TONIC is working with Catch 22 and St Giles on a new research project for the Department for Education. TONIC are looking to speak with parents and carers of children who were involved in violence aged 18 or under between 2022 and 2025.

This research is completely voluntary and confidential . It’s a safe, judgment-free space where people can share their experiences in their own words. The aim is to better understand what helps or harms families affected by violence, and to make future support services stronger and more effective.

What’s involved?

An informal 1–2-hour conversation at a time that works best for the individual
Online, in-person, or by phone
Participants can bring someone with them for support
No right or wrong answers - TONIC want to listen and learn

The voices of parents and carers are vital. This is a real opportunity to help influence national policy and create better services for young people and families.

Get in touch to learn more: research@tonic.org.uk

Find out more about TONIC: www.tonic.org.uk

Only 7 Days Left to Grab Your Early Bird Tickets!

Fri, 08 Aug 2025 13:33:59 GMT

Only 7 Days Left to Grab Your Early Bird Tickets!

The countdown is officially on, there’s just one week left to secure your Early Bird ticket for Breaking the Silence!

This is more than just a conference. It’s a one day event designed to spark change, share knowledge and give you the tools to make a difference in the lives of families affected by Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA).

Why You Should Be There

CPA affects at least 1 in 10 families, yet it’s still under recognised and often misunderstood. This event is a opportunity to bring it into the spotlight and explore thought provoking discussions, real insight from expert knowledge - all through a safeguarding lens.

-Incredible Line-up of Speakers

Hear from leading safeguarding experts, practitioners, and voices with lived experience. We’ll even be joined by the Domestic Abuse Commissioner for England & Wales!

-Hands-On, Practical Workshops
Choose from four workshops designed to give you strategies you can put into your work immediately:

Facilitating Choice – Safety & Justice Options for Older Victim-Survivors (Dewis Choice) - 7 spaces left!
Working With Those Who Harm (Warren Betts) - 6 spaces left
Spiritual & Ritual Abuse (Jordan Alexander, Prism Training) - 6 spaces left!
PRAM – PEGS Risk Awareness Model (Chloe Egan, PEGS) - 5 spaces left!

-Access to Exclusive Resources
Your ticket doesn’t just cover the day, you’ll also get access to all content from previous PEGS conferences on our exclusive online platform, along with research, tools and insightful takeaways to support your ongoing work.

-Network With the Professionals Who Can Make Change Happen
Meet over 150 professionals from social care, policing, education, healthcare, local government, the third sector and academia. This is a space to connect, collaborate and building partnerships that last.

-Expo Spaces & Sponsors

Explore the work of different organisations who are making a difference , there’s still a limited number of expo spaces available!

It’s CPD Certified!

Don’t wait too long, Early Bird Ends in 7 Days!

Date: Tuesday 14th October 2025
Location: Shrewsbury Football Club
To find out more please visit: www.pegsevents.co.uk

Join us in breaking the silence, amplifying the voices that need to be heard.

To if you want us to keep your early bird ticket aside, please contact us at admin@pegsupport.com

3-year evaluation

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 16:29:29 GMT

National Lottery funding helps thousands of parental figures

It is with true pride that we are able to reveal the impact of the Lottery grant we were awarded three years ago, which has seen PEGS able to support thousands of parents.

Back in 2022, we were supported by the National Lottery Community Fund to start a three-year project which included our provision of one-to-one bespoke support and advocacy; delivery of workshops, programmes and practitioner-led sessions; and facilitation of our closed Facebook peer support group. That funding has now come to an end, but we were able to reveal a few weeks ago

that we had been success in a further bid, meaning a Lottery grant will cover some of our services for the next three years, until 2028.

Alongside this, we have been evaluating the first project, as well as assessing what we can learn from and improve upon as we go forward.

The headline numbers:

 We provided more than 2,100 one-to-one support packages to those at high risk due to Child to Parent Abuse.
 We held more than 1,800 practitioner-led sessions.
 Almost 4,500 parents or carers attended at least one of these sessions during the three years.
 The PEGS team spoke to almost 2,500 professionals on an individual basis.
 We acted as advocates in more than 2,600 meetings.

Parents’ feedback:

 94% of parent or carers receiving one-to-one support reported animprovement in wellbeing, 96% said their confidence had increased, and 74%
were calling the police about incidents of CPA less frequently.
 99% of parental figures said they would recommend our support to others.
 100% said practitioner-led sessions improved their wellbeing.
 99% said our workshops were useful, 99% said they would continue to use
the techniques they’d learned during them, and 100% would recommend
them to others.

Our Founder Michelle says:

“While we are naturally pleased to report such a resounding success in terms of the feedback from parents and carers, and the number of individuals we’ve been able to support as a result of the Lottery grant, for us what matters most is the stories behind

each one of these statistics. “The team may run PEGS, but truly the organisation belongs to a community of incredible people who are facing some of the most unsafe and traumatic times of their lives. It has been a true privilege to be able to listen to, support and empower so many parental figures who have, for a long time, gone unseen and unheard. “We have learned so much from them too, they inspire us every single day and we are so proud of them all.”

You can download the full report below

Resources needed to increase impact of Domestic Homicide Reviews

Tue, 29 Jul 2025 14:06:25 GMT

Resources needed to increase impact of Domestic Homicide Reviews, says Commissioner

*Trigger warning, this blog focuses on a report which talks about homicide, domestic abuse, and suicide. Please only read if you feel safe to do so.*

For almost 15 years, when an individual has sadly lost their life at the hands of a relative or partner, this has been followed by a process called a Domestic Homicide Review (DHR).

Reviews seek to identify whether anything could have been done differently by the professionals involved before the death to prevent it from happening, and whether additional safeguards can be put in place to minimise the risk to others in similar situations.

A DHR occurs every time someone dies either directly because of domestic abuse (which includes a death caused by the person’s child, provided that child was over 16 at the time) or by suicide, where there is evidence that domestic abuse contributed towards the death.

But Domestic Abuse Commissioner Dame Nicole Jacobs has raised a number of serious concerns about how effective DHRs are, releasing a Learning from Loss report with a number of findings she has labelled as ‘stark and concerning’.

The report looks at all DHRs at a whole, whether the case relates to an intimate partner or familial homicide – but, if the changes proposed by the Commissioner are implemented, they will undoubtedly have an impact in tragic cases where an individual is killed by their child.

Thanks to Dr Amanda Holt’s research , we know there are approximately 19 such deaths (referred to as familial homicides, or more specifically parricide) in England and Wales every year.

The report states:

The findings of the report were that families faced an average of a three-year wait for the conclusion of a review. And even once recommendations had been issued, some were never acted upon or had to be ‘abandoned by local agencies because of a lack of resource or guidance’.

Despite calls from campaigners, implementing action plans has remained a local responsibility and – even where recommendations have been shared with the Home Office or other national bodies – it is unclear if and how they have been actioned. This means there is no collective understanding of how action plans have been completed and what impact this has had on preventing future harm.

Better identification of deaths relating to domestic abuse, and the inclusion from 2016 of domestic-related suicides, means there are more DHRs than ever (an increase of 23% between 2020 and 2023) – but there has been little done to change the process or provide more resources to allow effective management of this rise in review numbers.

Additionally, while one of the aims of the review process is to reduce the number of domestic-related deaths, it is challenging to evidence this – especially due to the inability to establish a causal link between review recommendations and a reduction in deaths or harm.

The Commissioner’s pilot:

The pilot detailed within the report aimed to test the best way for DHRs to be overseen nationally by the Commissioner, considering elements such as resourcing, sharing of best practice, supporting escalation of identified issues, and the co-ordination of reviews locally. Two different models were tested by 20 areas over a 12-month period, with data gathered and analysis undertaken around the implementation of recommendations and completion of actions, as well as further information about the reason behind incomplete or abandoned actions.

A number of improvements were identified as being needed across the core areas of multi-agency working, enhancing assessments, managing information, developing practice, training staff, and policy and process. It has now been recommended that a second 12-month pilot take place to further develop a ‘local and national accountability and oversight mechanism’, alongside the development of bespoke AI-enabled technology to collect, analyse and share the vast amounts of data involved in DHRs. Additionally, the report states more resources should be allocated to the Commissioner’s Office so local areas and the Government can be held to account.

At PEGS, we welcome the effort being put into improving the effectiveness of DHRs, to ensure all recommendations which could reduce future risk are put into place, that best practice is shared, and that actions are put in place nationally where needed. We hope to see the Commissioner’s plans become a reality, leading to more joined-up thinking locally and nationally.

Our thoughts are with all of those impacted by domestic-related homicide, we will always remember the very real people behind the statistics and data.

July Spotlight: Emotional Abuse

Mon, 28 Jul 2025 11:50:01 GMT

July Spotlight: Emotional Abuse

When we talk about child-to-parent abuse (CPA) many people immediately think of shouting, threats or physical abuse. One of the most common forms of abuse we see at PEGS is emotional abuse.

Over the past five years we’ve listened to thousands of parents, carers and guardians who have bravely shared how emotional abuse has impacted their mental health, self worth and sense of safety in their own homes.

It can be silent and incredibly isolating - making many parents question if it’s really happening or asking themselves “ is this my fault “.

So what do we mean by emotional abuse?

In the context of CPA, emotional abuse is when words, silence, manipulation or threats to control, inflict fear or cause psychological impact to a parental figure.

This can look like:

Constant criticism or belittling
Blaming parents for everything that goes wrong
Withholding affection or giving the “silent treatment”
Gaslighting or denying behaviours
Threatening to inflict abuse/harm on themselves or others as a form of control
Making a parent feel guilty for anything they do, this could be using tone of voice, body language and the choice of words to help control and manipulate certain situations
Using personal or sensitive information to manipulate

Parents often describe feeling as though they’re walking on eggshells or tip toeing around, even when they are at home.

Parents might fear saying the wrong thing or even avoid conversations altogether, withdrawing from social occasions and anything in general. Many find themselves apologising for things they haven’t done - all in an attempt to feel comfortable and safe.

Emotional abuse can lead to:

Anxiety or depression
Difficulty sleeping or eating
Constant feelings of guilt or shame
Social withdrawal and isolation
Questioning your own parenting, identity or judgement
Feeling like you’re “losing yourself”

Unlike physical abuse, emotional abuse leaves no visible marks, but the impact can be just as lasting.

And just as real.

From one of our recent surveys, we found that:

100% of respondents say their emotional wellbeing has been negatively impacted.

94% feel stressed.

96% feel isolated.

80% have had friends or family cut ties because of their situation.

Emotional abuse is part of each and every form of abuse.

You are not alone, and none of this is your fault.

If you're unsure whether what you’re experiencing is emotional abuse or if you simply need a safe space to talk about it, we’re here.

Also, there are also some fantastic organisations who have great resources and ways to support you if you’re experiencing emotional abuse.

1.Samaritans

Website: www.samaritans.org

Free 24/7 Helpline: 116 123

S amaritans offer a safe, confidential space to talk about anything you’re going through - emotional abuse included. You don’t have to be in crisis to reach out.

2.Respect – Men’s Advice Line

Website: www.mensadviceline.org.uk

Free Helpline (Mon–Fri, 10am–8pm): 0808 801 0327

Respect provides free, confidential support for men experiencing emotional or other forms of domestic abuse, including from partners or family members.

3. Victim Support

Website: www.victimsupport.org.uk

Free 24/7 Supportline: 0808 1689 111

Victim Support offers emotional and practical help for anyone affected by crime or abuse whether or not it’s been reported to the police. They have local teams across the UK and also offer live chat and self-referral.

Service Shoutout: The Institute for Addressing Strangulation

Tue, 22 Jul 2025 10:07:43 GMT

The Institute for Addressing Strangulation

The Institute for Addressing Strangulation (IFAS) was established following the introduction of new legislation in England and Wales in June 2022, marking strangulation as a standalone offence.

At IFAS, our aim is to address strangulation in all contexts through the development of resources, training, and the UK research evidence base. An overview of some of our work conducted to date is provided below.

Strangulation involves the obstruction of the airway and/or blood vessels in the neck which can result in decreased oxygen supply to the brain. An overview of the signs and symptoms which could result from strangulation can be found in our paper for the Faculty of Forensic and Legal Medicine. This paper is particularly relevant when considering strangulation in the contexts of physical and sexual violence.

For those victim/survivors who are subjected to strangulation in these contexts, we have published a victim information leaflet which is currently available in eight different languages. This leaflet contains information on the possible physical and psychological impacts of strangulation, as well as how and where to seek support. At IFAS, we are also aware that there are some people who experience strangulation who would not identify themselves as a “victim” and therefore may not engage with victim- focused resources. For those, we have developed a strangulation and ‘choking’ factsheet. We acknowledge the use of different terms for strangulation, including ‘choking’ which is more commonly used in the context of strangulation during sex. Research we have conducted on the prevalence of strangulation during sex suggests that this behaviour is most commonly used in younger (16-34 year old), compared with older, age groups. This is both with regard to those who are strangled and those who strangle others.

However strangulation presents, there can be implications for practitioners in how they might respond to these cases. We have developed Data Capture Guidance for all organisations to consider how to appropriately record and report on disclosures, reports and cases of strangulation in their services. For clinicians, specifically, we have published guidelines for clinical management of non-fatal strangulation in acute and emergency care services.

When cases are reported to the police – and we know there were 39,360 strangulation and suffocation offences reported across England and Wales in 2023-2024 alone – we understand the importance of a specialised response. In 2024, we developed Guidance for

the Police Management of Strangulation which includes relevant material from international guides, and input from English forces.

At IFAS, we work to address both non-fatal and fatal strangulation. Our Domestic Homicide Review Series showed how non-fatal strangulation was reported in the abuse histories of 19% of domestic homicides, and that there are differences in the demographics and

circumstances of fatal strangulation homicides compared with homicides caused by stabbing. Some of these differences included the gender of victims, with 74% of stabbing victims being female, compared with 95% of strangulation victims. Understanding these

differences is important for us to be able to consider the characteristics of cases involving strangulation, so that we can make recommendations for future response and prevention work.

The lived experiences of victim/survivors of strangulation is central to the work we do at IFAS. The ‘Reclaiming My Voice’ project was designed to demonstrate and celebrate the contribution of those with lived experience throughout the work of IFAS since its inception.

From interviews with survivors, a report was produced exploring themes of shame and isolation, showing how sharing lived experience can help both individual lived experience advocates and other survivors. An animation, designed to be viewed and used by anyone,

was also produced from this project.

At IFAS, we continue to address strangulation across multiple contexts, with the aim of sharing learning and developing the UK evidence base. We encourage the development of professional practice in response to, and in the work to prevent the harms of, strangulation.

Anyone wishing to hear more about the work of IFAS is welcome to sign up to our mailing list, or make contact with the team.

Half-price Student tickets for Child to Parent Abuse Conference

Fri, 18 Jul 2025 10:22:08 GMT

Half-price student tickets for Child to Parent Abuse conference

Students have the chance to hear from leading Child to Parent Abuse experts at a discounted rate.

Half-price student tickets are available for the upcoming Breaking the Silence conference, hosted by social enterprise PEGS at Shrewsbury Football Club in Shropshire.

A limited number are on sale – so places should be booked as soon as possible to secure a seat at the conference, which takes place on Tuesday 14 th October. It is the first in-person event after a series of successful virtual events organised by PEGS, and will be specifically focused on how Child to Parent Abuse links to the issue of safeguarding.

Students looking to enter careers within emergency services, education, health and social care would be find the day particularly relevant. Speakers will include Annelli Peavot, Head of Safeguarding at Canterbury Christ Church University; Billy Cragg-Hughes, Lead for the Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service at Warrington Borough Council; Fiona Wells, Adoption Expert and Founder of PATCH; Gemma Roberts, CEO of Preston Domestic Violence Service; and Mandi Whittle, Lecturer of Criminology at Lancaster University.

PEGS Founder Michelle John said: “We want to encourage the next generation of Child to Parent Abuse experts, meaning that in the future affected parents and carers should have even more support when it comes to reaching out to professionals. So, it’s important to us that the conference is attended not only by those already working within relevant professions, but also the students who will be

doing so in years to come"

“That’s why we have made a limited number of tickets available for just £45 for the entire day – there are also four optional workshops that students can purchase a space at when they buy their ticket for the main event."

“We look forward to welcoming attendees, not only so they can learn from our fantastic experts, but also so they can share their ideas and knowledge with us – we know current learners will have innovative ways of looking at Child to Parent Abuse support and safeguarding, and we’re keen to hear from them!”

Visit: www.pegsevents.co.uk to find out more about the Breaking the Silence conference and to secure a ticket. Keep up to date with all the latest from PEGS by searching and following ‘PEGS Support’ on social media.

We’re Proud to Be a Level 2 Disability Confident Committed Organisation

Fri, 11 Jul 2025 09:58:34 GMT

We’re Proud to Be a Level 2 Disability Confident Committed Organisation

We’re always looking for ways to do more, be better and break down barriers for anyone, including the parents and carers we support, for the professionals we work alongside and for our own team. That’s why we’re incredibly proud to share that PEGS is now officially a Level 2 Disability Confident Committed Organisation.

So, what does that mean and why does it matter?

The Disability Confident scheme is about more than ticking boxes. It’s a commitment to inclusion and accessibility, making sure that everyone, regardless of disability has the opportunity to thrive and feel comfortable.

Becoming a Level 2 Disability Confident employer reinforces our promise to continue learning, improving and removing the barriers that can get in the way of anyone reaching their potential.

Why This Is Important for Professionals

For the professionals and partners we work with, whether in education, social care, policing, health or beyond, this step sends a clear message. We’re an organisation that values equality and fairness. We want to collaborate with others who share these values and who understand.

We’re always championing those on the frontline who are trying to make a difference in the lives of families affected by child-to-parent abuse. We know that creating a more inclusive workforce and sector overall benefits everyone.

Why It Matters for the Parents & Carers We Support

To the parents and carers who we support, being Disability Confident means we’re ensuring our support is accessible to all parental figures, whatever your background, needs or circumstances. We're constantly working on ideas to make our services easier to use and easier to access.

It also means that if you want to get involved with PEGS, as a volunteer, peer supporter or team member, we’re committed to removing any barriers.

What’s Next?

Level 2 is an important milestone but we’re not stopping here. Team PEGS will continue listening, learning and adapting to become the best version of PEGS we can be. That means reviewing ourselves, offering training and making sure accessibility is woven into everything we do.

We’re excited about this next chapter and what it means for the future of PEGS and those we support.

Free Info Sessions: Child to Parent Abuse Project

Thu, 10 Jul 2025 10:33:29 GMT

Free Info Sessions: Our New Child to Parent Abuse Project

Are you a professional working with families in Shropshire, Telford & Wrekin, South Staffordshire, Worcestershire or Derbyshire?

We’re inviting you to join one of our upcoming information sessions to hear more about our brand new project focused on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), thanks to support from The National Lottery Community Fund.

These free 45-minute sessions are designed specifically for professionals in your area who want to understand more about CPA and the support available through PEGS.

During the session, we’ll cover:

Who PEGS are and the work we do

How to refer families into our service

The aims of our new CPA project

How we’re working to create change

What support is available for parents, carers and professionals

Whether you’re in education, social care, health, policing or any role supporting families, this is a chance to find out how we can help you in your work and how you can get involved in tackling the barriers of CPA together.

Choose the date that works best for you:

17th July, 10:00 AM
Click to join

12th August, 2:00 PM
Click to join

9th September, 10:00 AM
Click to join

Please feel free to share these sessions with colleagues or networks who may benefit. We’d love to see you there.

Alcohol Awareness Week – Rethink The Drink

Mon, 07 Jul 2025 09:36:17 GMT

Alcohol Awareness Week – Rethink The Drink (7th-13th July 2025)

What Is Alcohol Awareness Week?

Alcohol Awareness Week is all about helping people think about their drinking. It happens every year and gives us a chance to look at how alcohol affects us and the people around us. The idea is to raise awareness about the issues alcohol can cause and generate a space where alcohol is freely talked about without judgement.

Why We Should Talk About It?

Drinking is a normal part of life for a lot of people. Nights out, birthdays, weekends –it’s just what we do. But that also means it’s easy to ignore how much we’re drinking or how it impacts our bodies. Some people might be struggling with it but don’t want to address it due to the fear of what others might think. That’s why it’s so important to talk about it more openly.

How Much Is Too Much?

The NHS recommends not to drink more than 14 units a week. That’s about six pints of beer or six glasses of wine. But it’s not just about numbers. If you drink most nights, or feel like you need a drink to relax or sleep, that could be a sign there’s a cause for concern. It’s worth thinking about how often you drink and why...

What Alcohol Can Do to You

Drinking too much isn’t just bad for your liver. It can also lead to problems like high blood pressure, weight gain, and even cancer. It can affect your sleep and your mood too. A lot of people drink to deal with stress or low moods, but alcohol can actually make those things worse over time.

How to Make a Change

You don’t need to quit completely to make a difference. You could try having a few alcohol-free days each week, or switch to drinks with less alcohol in them. You might want to try something like dry January or sober October to see how it feels not drinking for a prolonged amount of time. These changes can be beneficial towards better sleep quality, energy, and support your mental health.

Where to Get Help?
If you’re worried about how much you’re drinking, there’s help out there. You can talk to your GP, a friend, or reach out to one of the organisations listed below. You’re not on your own, and getting support is nothing to be ashamed of.

Some places that can help:

● Drinkaware – Advice and tips for cutting back. There is a helpline and
webchat available as well as a mobile app - Mydrinkaware

● Alcohol Change UK – Campaign info and support

● NHS Alcohol Support – Help with finding services

● Change, grow live - Support and advice, webchat available

● Samaritans - 116123 Jo@samaritans.org

● Mind - 030012333393

● Drink coach app - drinkcoach.org.uk

● Insight timer - Mindfulness

● Headspace - Holistic wellbeing

Final Thoughts
Alcohol Awareness Week is a good time to think about how we drink and if it’s doing us any harm. Even if you feel fine, it’s always good to check in with yourself. A few small changes could make a big difference. It’s never too late to make a better choice when it comes to alcohol.

‘Small changes add up to huge results’

Tickets Now Available: Join us This October for Breaking the Silence

Thu, 03 Jul 2025 14:19:30 GMT

Tickets Now Available: Join Us This October for Breaking the Silence

We’re excited to share that tickets are now on sale for our upcoming in-person conference!

Breaking the Silence: A Multi-Agency Approach to Child-to-Parent Abuse and Safeguarding , taking place this October, this powerful event will bring together professionals from across the UK to explore the complexities of Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) through a safeguarding lens.

This is more than just a conference, it's a space for learning, reflection, collaboration and real change.

What to Expect

We know how important it is to come together across sectors to tackle CPA in a meaningful way. That’s why the day is packed with opportunities to engage, share and learn, including:

Insight from leading voices across safeguarding, social care, education and more
Live Q&A panels with frontline practitioners and researchers
Practical, limited-space workshops designed to deepen your understanding
Exclusive access to resources before and after the event

Whether you’re working directly with families, shaping services, building research, or simply feel a responsibility to speak up about CPA, this is a chance to be part of something bigger.

Early Bird Offer – Book by 31st July

If you book your ticket before 31st July, you’ll receive an exclusive 5% discount.
Tickets are limited and we expect them to go quickly, so we’d encourage you to secure your place soon.

Why It Matters

Child-to-Parent Abuse remains one of the least understood and most underreported safeguarding issues in the UK. By coming together, we can break the silence, challenge outdated perceptions, and move towards a more joined-up response across our different communities.

This day is about making space for that work to happen.

We hope you’ll join us!

Book your ticket here:

Service Spotlight: FearFree

Mon, 30 Jun 2025 14:39:02 GMT

Service Spotlight: FearFree

We know that navigating abuse within the home, especially when it involves child-to-parent abuse can feel incredibly isolating. That’s why we’re passionate about sharing one of the organisations who are doing vital and often life changing work across the UK to support individuals and families affected by domestic abuse.

This month, our Service Shoutout goes to the brilliant team at FearFree.

Who are FearFree?

Based in the South West, FearFree is a forward thinking charity offering practical, emotional and trauma-informed support to adults, children and young people experiencing domestic abuse, sexual abuse and stalking. Their approach is grounded in the belief that everyone deserves to live a life free from fear, something that resonates deeply with us here at PEGS.

FearFree’s services cover everything from crisis intervention to longer-term recovery support and they work not only with victims and survivors, but with whole families: including those using harmful behaviours to build safer futures.

What makes FearFree stand out?

One of the things we love about FearFree is their holistic approach. They know that every family situation is different and that no single pathway fits all. Whether someone needs a safe place to stay, support in the courtroom or simply someone to listen without judgment, FearFree meets them where they are.

They’re also champions of early intervention and prevention, something we value highly in our own work. Through community outreach, education and partnership working, they help raise awareness of abuse and reduce the stigma, making it easier for people to speak up and seek help.

Why this matters to PEGS

We work with families experiencing child-to-parent abuse and we know that having the right kind of support delivered with empathy and understanding can be life-changing.

FearFree’s commitment to non-judgmental, inclusive, person centred support aligns so closely with our values and we’re grateful for the work they do in championing safer, more compassionate communities.

You can learn more about FearFree’s work or make a referral via their website: www.fearfree.org.uk

June Spotlight: Financial Abuse

Fri, 27 Jun 2025 10:51:48 GMT

June Spotlight: Financial Abuse

When we talk about child-to-parent abuse (CPA), most people think of shouting, threats and physical assaults. But there’s many forms of abuse that often go unseen.

We have heard over the past five years from thousands of parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing financial abuse from their child and many may not even know they are experiencing this form of abuse. Our recent findings on a report on child to parent abuse revealed that 82% of parental figures are being financially controlled in some way from their child. With also adding the 69% Being stolen from.

What do we mean by financial abuse ?

Financial abuse in CPA, is when a child regardless of their age ,uses money as a tool of control, manipulation, or harm against a parental figure. This can take many forms, including:

Demanding or stealing money from a parent or guardian
Using threats or emotional blackmail to get access to money
Running up bills in a parent’s name, or taking loans without consent
Refusing to contribute financially as an adult child, while using intimidation to stay in the home
Sabotaging a parent’s job or income, making them financially dependent

Parents often describe feeling trapped and caught between the fear of their child’s reaction if they do not comply with their child demands, or they will preempt being asked for money so they will send their child money first to avoid any incident, this is financial coercion and control and is never okay.

Financial abuse carries a unique shame. Unlike physical abuse, there are often no visible signs. Parents may feel embarrassed, blaming themselves for “failing” to control the situation or how they fear they or someone else they love and care about would be hurt in some way if they do not hand over money, access to bank accounts or savings some parents tell us how they do not want to get their child into trouble. This can leave parental figures further isolated and at risk.

Parents have told us how they:

Have had their bank accounts emptied by their child
Are too afraid to confront their child about missing money
Have lost their jobs due to financial manipulation and control
Feel intense guilt for trying to set financial boundaries

Have found themselves in debt due to experiencing financial control from their child

Have had online accounts such as shopping, catalogues, computer games, created in their name and attached to their bank account or credit cards

Have been forced or coerced to buy drugs or alcohol for their child

It can be really difficult to identify financial abuse from a child towards a parent. Some signs that financial abuse could be occurring can include:

Missing personal possessions.

Unexplained lack of money or inability to maintain lifestyle.

Unexplained withdrawal of funds from accounts.

Adding a child to their bank accounts , giving them access to their money including savings

Accounts being created your name without your knowledge or consent

Debt collectors turning up or letters being sent for a debt you have no knowledge of but is in your name

Power of attorney or lasting power of attorney (LPA) being obtained after the person has ceased to have mental capacity.

There are some fantastic and specialist organisations alongside PEGS who can help support you if you are experiencing financial abuse:

1. Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA) / Money Advice Plus Financial Support Line

Specialist helpline for victims of domestic and economic abuse.

Calls are free (0808 196 8845, Mon–Fri 9 am–1 pm & 2–5 pm) theguardian.com+6survivingeconomicabuse.org+6survivingeconomicabuse.org+6 .

2. Money Advice Plus

Offers free, confidential debt and benefits advice, including targeted case support moneytothemasses.com+9survivingeconomicabuse.org+9moneyadviceplus.org.uk+9 .

3. StepChange Debt Charity

Unlimited, free debt advice via phone (0800 138 1111) and online tools england.nhs.uk+8stepchange.org+8moneytothemasses.com+8 .

4. Citizens Advice

Free advice on debt, benefits, housing, employment, and more via phone, webchat, or in‑person at local branches england.nhs.uk+15which.co.uk+15en.wikipedia.org+15 .

Reflections from the Morecrofts Domestic Abuse Conference

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 09:17:17 GMT

Coming Together to Create Change

Last week, the PEGS team had the honour of attending and speaking at the Domestic Abuse Conference hosted by Morecrofts Solicitors—an incredibly insightful and moving day dedicated to raising awareness, sharing expertise and strengthening our collective response to domestic abuse.

With a history dating back over 200 years, Morecrofts Solicitors is one of Liverpool’s oldest and most respected law firms. Known for their commitment to both professional excellence and community impact, Morecrofts has long supported initiatives that protect vulnerable individuals and families, particularly in the field of family law and safeguarding. Their annual domestic abuse conference is a shining example of their dedication to promoting conversation, action, and change in this vital area.

The conference brought together professionals, organisations and frontline practitioners from a range of sectors, all committed to tackling domestic abuse in its many forms. Each speaker offered a different lens into how abuse can affect individuals and families: emotionally, physically, psychologically, financially, and digitally.

From the courtroom to the community organisations and therapeutic professionals, to housing and animal welfare, the day offered a powerful reminder that domestic abuse is a complex issue requiring a joined-up, compassionate approach.

We were truly privileged to be included in the speaker line-up, alongside some of the most dedicated and knowledgeable voices in the sector. Speakers included:

Refuge, sharing vital work supporting those who experience tech abuse
Dogs Trust, highlighting how pets can be used as tools of coercion, and how this impacts survivors
Merseyside Police, offering insight into law enforcement responses and a lived experience overview
Morecrofts Solicitors, exploring the legal landscape surrounding domestic abuse
A Consultant Systemic Psychotherapist, discussing the psychology between gender and expectations
Torus Housing, focusing on housing support and safety
And the powerful voice of lived experience advocate Molly Taylor

At PEGS, we were proud to contribute by raising awareness of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA).

Being able to speak about CPA among such passionate and informed professionals felt like a vital step forward. Throughout the day, one theme stood out clearly: the need for collaboration. Domestic abuse doesn’t sit in one service, one system or one experience—it’s a societal issue that requires us to work together, listen closely and push for change across every level.

We left the conference feeling hopeful, energised and reminded of the power of connection. A heartfelt thank you to the Morecrofts team for creating space for these essential conversations and for bringing people together with a shared purpose.

Together, we can, and will create change.

Volunteer Programme Lead & Training Facilitator: An Exciting New Role!

Tue, 24 Jun 2025 10:10:06 GMT

An Exciting New Chapter for PEGS!

We’re thrilled to share that we’ve been able to open an exciting new role at PEGS: Volunteer Programme Lead & Training Facilitator - thanks to the incredible support of the National Lottery Community Fund.

The role will focus on two key areas: developing a structured and supportive volunteer programme, and delivering CPD-accredited training to both volunteers and external professionals. This means we’ll be able to reach even more families affected by Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), and continue to build a confident and informed network of professionals working across the UK.

We’re so grateful to the National Lottery Community Fund for making this growth possible. This support helps us strengthen our service and continue working towards a future where no parent or carer feels alone in what they’re experiencing.

Please read the below for the brief job description:

Organisation: PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support)
Location: Shrewsbury - primarily office based and occasional traveling

Salary: £13.50 per hour increasing to £14.50 per hour after probation
Hours: 25 hours per week
Contract Type: Fixed-term until July 2028 (Funded by The National Lottery)

About Us

PEGS is a lived-experience-led organisation supporting parents, carers, and professionals impacted by Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). We’re passionate about creating long-term change in how CPA is understood and addressed across the UK.

Everything we do is trauma-informed, person-centred, and grounded in empathy, collaboration, and authenticity.

Why Join PEGS?

Make a meaningful difference through lived-experience-led work
Lead and shape a growing national volunteer programme
Deliver CPD-accredited training that empowers professionals and families
Supportive, values-led team culture
Flexible working, wellbeing benefits, and development opportunities

Role Overview

Are you a confident trainer, strong communicator, and natural leader? Do you have a passion for working with volunteers and driving change through education and engagement?

We’re looking for someone to develop and lead our volunteer programme, and deliver high-quality CPD-accredited training to professionals and volunteers across sectors including education, health, and social care.

You’ll work closely with our Director, Service Manager and practitioners, and help shape how PEGS expands its reach and impact through volunteer involvement and knowledge sharing.

This is an opportunity to develop and shape a volunteer programme

Designing and delivering CPD-accredited training to both volunteers and external professionals across the UK

You’ll work closely with the Director, Service Manager and Practitioners, and play a vital part in shaping how PEGS grows and supports others through training and engagement.

Key Responsibilities

Volunteer Programme

Develop volunteer roles, contracts and a comprehensive volunteer framework
Organise recruitment events and volunteer induction sessions
Create and manage rotas and ongoing communication with volunteers
Provide regular support, supervision and recognition
Maintain records, feedback forms and evaluations
Update and manage the Volunteer Handbook and related documents

Training Delivery

Design and deliver training sessions for professionals and volunteers
Keep content aligned with CPD standards and PEGS’ values
Tailor materials to different audiences and sectors (e.g., social care, education)
Update resources based on feedback and emerging needs
Support and deliver conferences, online workshops and regional events

What you bring:

Experience delivering training, in-person and online, including to large group of people from diverse backgrounds and different learning styles
Experience managing and supporting staff in a structured way
Strong communication and public speaking skills, you captivate the crowds and keep them engaged
Experience creating/updating training materials, which are engaging and adapted to your audience

Bonus if You Also Have:

Understanding of the charity/third sector
Worked with volunteers or volunteered yourself
UK driving licence and access to a vehicle (travel required)
Understanding of trauma-informed practice
Experience with safeguarding and lived experience inclusion

What We Offer

Flexible and hybrid working at least 1 day per week
Mileage allowance, other transports and/or accommodation are covered when required following PEGS’ travel policy
CPD and training opportunities
Supportive team culture
The chance to make a genuine impact in a growing national organisation
Birthday off after 12 months of service
2 Well-being days off per year
Health Cash Plan with Paycare once passed probation

To Apply:

If you are interested in applying, please send your CV to: hr@pegsupport.com

Sponsor an Event That’s Driving Change: Breaking the Silence 2025

Mon, 16 Jun 2025 11:26:44 GMT

Sponsor an Event That’s Driving Real Change: Breaking the Silence 2025

We’re getting ready for our next big conference, Breaking the Silence: A Multi-Agency Approach to Child-to-Parent Abuse and Safeguarding, taking place on Tuesday 14th October 2025 at Shrewsbury Football Club.

This year’s theme is clear: Addressing Child-to-Parent Abuse – Through a safeguarding lens. It’s an issue that needs more national attention. This event is bringing together professionals from across sectors who are on the frontline of making that much needed change.

We’re expecting over 150 attendees including professionals from social work, policing, education, healthcare, local government, the third sector and academia.

If your organisation works in or supports safeguarding, social care, domestic abuse or social justice, we’d love you to consider getting involved as a sponsor.

We have many packages that may be suitable to you and your organisation.

Why Get Involved?

This is a great opportunity to:

Show your support for a vital safeguarding issue
By sponsoring, you’re helping raise awareness of child-to-parent abuse and supporting professionals working with impacted families.
Be seen as a leader in safeguarding and family support
Position your organisation as one that’s actively part of breaking the silence.
Connect with key decision makers and frontline professionals
This is a chance to be in the room with inspiring individuals and professionals who are making real change happen.
Gain long-term brand exposure
Our conference format means your organisation will be visible before, during and long after the event. The online platform stays open until the end of 2025, and we’re also offering an on-demand ticket option post-event, increasing your reach even further than you may think.

All sponsors will be featured on our dedicated online platform ( www.pegsevents.co.uk ), where attendees can access the digital handbook, view content, and learn more about partner organisations.

Your logo and links to your website will be included and seen by all delegates, speakers and professionals involved.

Access to the platform opens when tickets go on sale, giving your organisation extended visibility to our growing audience of professionals.

If you’re interested in sponsoring or want to talk through your own ideas for getting involved, we’d love to hear from you. Just drop us a message at admin@pegsupport.com and we’ll arrange a time to chat.

Let’s break the silence together.

Feel free to view our packages below:

Carers Week: A New Resource Just for You

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 12:30:49 GMT

Carers Week: A New Resource Just for You

This Carers Week 2025 we're taking a moment to recognise and celebrate the incredible dedication of carers across the UK.

Whether you're supporting a loved one through illness or challenging circumstances, your role is invaluable.

To recognise your efforts and provide meaningful support, we’ve created a brand-new Carer Support Guide . This resource is packed with helpful information, including:

The impact of caring

Support and resources available

Mental health and wellbeing

Emotional support

Work, education, and caring

Plus other useful tips and information

We know how important it is for carers to feel supported and this guide is our way of saying, you’re not alone and you are appreciated.

You can download the guide and explore resources, tips and tools to help you manage the challenges of caring while also looking after yourself.

Let’s use this week not only to say thank you, but to ensure every carer feels heard. #carersweek2025

Download our guide below:

Hollyoaks: CPA Storyline

Tue, 10 Jun 2025 12:27:10 GMT

Hollyoaks storyline to address Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Channel 4’s flagship continuing drama Hollyoaks is to highlight a common but under-recognised form of domestic abuse, in a storyline focusing on the changing dynamic of father and son, Ste Hay (Kieron Richardson) and Lucas Hay (Oscar Curtis).

Lived experience organisation PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support) – who have consulted with the programme - offers help to parents being abused by their children, be it verbal, physical, emotional, financial, or other. According to a recent survey taken by the organisation, 25% of parents who are seeking advice are being physically abused by their children each month.

Female parents are more likely to experience this form of abuse however studies show that CPA comes in many forms, and Hollyoaks will be looking at this through the lens of a father and teenage son relationship. In recent episodes, 17-year-old Lucas Hay was diagnosed with a brain tumour and had to undergo lifesaving surgery. Even though there were complications during the procedure, Lucas is set to make a full recovery, with his dad Ste now caring for him at home.

While recovering, Lucas is also trying to rebuild his relationship with first love Dillon, who was recently groomed into an exploitation ring which subsequently led to him developing a drug addiction with a long road to recovery ahead. Dillon is now living with the Hay family.

Hollyoaks is now available to stream from 7am Monday to Wednesday on Channel 4 or watch live on E4 at 7pm.

Ste was unaware that his boyfriend Rex was involved in the exploitation business and recruited Dillon. Lucas holds resentment towards his dad for not realising sooner that Rex was dangerous. In upcoming episodes, viewers will see Lucas physically abuse his dad Ste after

finding out that he warned Dillon to keep his distance in a bid to keep his son safe. When Tony notices the bruising on his employee, Ste downplays the situation and Lucas is quick to apologise. However, Hollyoaks confirms that the storyline is set to continue as Lucas takes his anger out on Ste behind closed doors, with the dad blaming himself.

Lucas has a history of violence, having spent time in young offenders last year for attacking fellow student JJ, and he also physically assaulted his partner Dillon the year prior when he was coming to terms with his sexuality.

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS, said:

“We're proud to support Hollyoaks in bringing awareness to Child to Parent Abuse, taking a vital step towards this important issue being more widely recognised and spoken about. CPA is often hidden or misunderstood, and it's vital that we start more conversations about what families are really experiencing behind closed doors. Being such a popular programme, we know that the Hollyoaks storyline will help parents who are experiencing abusive behaviours to feel more confident in asking for support from those around them.

“We're also confident it will provoke these much-needed conversations among the wider public, and we thank the production team and the actors for their commitment to portraying the storyline in a sensitive and realistic manner. Families experiencing CPA are not looking for blame to be placed upon their children, and this storyline reflects the need for early intervention, support and understanding as well as highlighting the complex emotions and challenges many families face.”

On taking on this issue-based story, Hollyoaks actor Kieron Richardson said:

“This storyline is one that as a parent is conflicting, as you would do anything for your kids. It flips the script on what many people assume abuse looks like and both Oscar and I are working hard to show what happens when the dynamic is reversed.

“We often think of parents disciplining children, but what happens when the dynamic is reversed? It’s uncomfortable, it’s emotional, and it’s real. We’ve worked closely with experts to make sure this is portrayed truthfully, and I hope it encourages the kind of conversations that might help families going through similar situations feel seen and supported.”

Hollyoaks is now available to stream from 7am Monday to

Wednesday on Channel 4 or watch live on E4 at 7pm.

A Little Message: PEGS' Volunteer

Thu, 05 Jun 2025 10:17:51 GMT

Volunteering at PEGS

I started volunteering for pegs roughly two years ago , I decided to volunteer for pegs due to my own personal experiences and had previously accessed pegs as a parent.

Pegs was the only service that was there for me as a parent that I believe truly understood what I was going through .

The pegs team at that time was very small and has now grown into a larger team of practitioners ( which is sad and due to demand ) however the team are all brilliant at what they do within their different roles . Pegs now offers more services to parents and the drop in sessions have increased to daily , it has been lovely to be a part of this journey and positive changes to support parents who access pegs

As I volunteer for the peer support page I have regular contact with the founding director and some other staff members when needed , I have always felt fully supported as a volunteer and any questions or advice I need has been answered / given very quickly.

As a volunteer I have also joined in the practitioner led drop ins , I enjoyed meeting parents some regular and some new , through my own journey I felt was able to offer some advice if needed or just be there as a listening ear this was always welcomed by the practitioner leading the session.

The founding director has always listened to my thoughts , views and ideas she has taken them into consideration as I volunteer i feel that I am listened to and my thoughts are valued.

Becoming a volunteer has helped me grow as a person and helped my confidence grow massively , I’m happy to give back to the service that helped me when I needed it.

I can’t offer hours each day of my time but any time I give is always appreciated and I’m always thanked for.

I love being part of the Pegs’s team and would encourage anyone who feels they could volunteer to do so regardless of the time they have free as even a small amount of time is always appreciated.

Thankyou to the director for letting me be a part of the team.

-PEGS, Peer Support Volunteer

National Lottery funding boost to help parents experiencing abuse

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 11:10:01 GMT

National Lottery funding boost to help parents experiencing abuse

Support for the most vulnerable parents in five regions can continue for the next three years thanks to a National Lottery grant. PEGS can now reveal The National Lottery Community Fund has awarded just over £350,000 to help us provide one-to-one Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) support for high-risk parents and carers in Telford & Wrekin, Shropshire, South Staffordshire, Derbyshire and Worcestershire over the next three years.

It’s the second grant we have received from the Lottery (the first covered 2022 to 2025) and it will also help us to continue our online practitioner-led sessions which run every weekday plus two evenings a week, and are open to any parent in the UK

who has an active referral with us. In addition, we’ll be looking to hire a new Volunteer and Training Co-ordinator to work in local communities, delivering CPA training and helping to grow our volunteer network. We’ll release more details about this role in due course!

PEGS’ founder Michelle John said: “We are delighted to have been successful in our second National Lottery grant application, with The National Lottery Community Fund recognising the positive impact our programmes have for parents who are experiencing CPA.

“Referrals from professionals and from parents, carers and guardians have been steadily rising month on month since we launched five years ago. While it’s heartening to see more people becoming aware of the support on offer from PEGS, it’s naturally upsetting to see that the demand is so high because of the number of families affected by CPA – thought to be anywhere upwards of one in ten across the UK.

“Continued support means we are able to provide one-to-ones for the most vulnerable people in these five regions, alongside our virtual practitioner-led sessions, which are both vital resources for parents experiencing CPA. We’re also looking forward to hiring our new Co-ordinator to extend our volunteer network and undertake targeted work in local communities – this will make a big difference to PEGS going forward and we thank the Lottery for making this possible!”

In the last three years, The National Lottery Community Fund has funded projects in every local authority and last year, awarded over half a billion pounds of game changing grants to nearly 14,000 projects.

May Spotlight: Physical Abuse

Thu, 29 May 2025 10:37:39 GMT

May Spotlight: Physical Abuse

Child-to-parent abuse (CPA) remains one of the least acknowledged forms of domestic abuse, often shrouded in shame, confusion and silence. While emotional and psychological abuse frequently come to the forefront in discussions about CPA, physical abuse is one of the most common forms of abuse when it comes to CPA. This can include hitting, kicking, biting, throwing objects or using weapons. Such behaviours not only cause immediate physical harm but often impact mental health and well being.

Recent data from our 2025 survey reveals the extent of physical abuse parents face in their own homes:

-25% of parents are physically assaulted by their child each month.
This isn't rare, it’s a recurring pattern affecting thousands of families, often behind closed doors.

-56% of parents report experiencing physical abuse overall.
More than half of those impacted by CPA experience physical abuse.

-91% are experiencing damage to their property.
While it does not directly need to be bodily harm, property damage often accompanies or precedes physical abuse.

Unlike other forms of domestic abuse, CPA challenges our expectations of parenting and child behaviour. Parents tell us they feel ashamed, blame and fear judgment. Many of PEGS’ parents worry that reporting their child’s behaviour will lead to criminalisation instead of support, which can be a further barrier for families receiving help.

The impact of physical abuse is not only about the physical injuries, and for some, their injuries require medical attention , our School holidays report revealed that during the 2023 summer holidays, 1 in 5 parents ended up in A & E due to injuries sustained from their child. This report is on our website, which you can download for free here

Physical abuse can lead to:

-Stress and anxiety

-Fear of being alone with their child

-Reluctance to seek help due to fear of not being believed or supported

-Impact on the wider family emotional wellbeing, particularly siblings or partners in the home.

-Employment may be affected due to the parent not being able to attend work or not wanting to go to work due to the questions around injuries / home life

-Reduction in contact with friends and the community resulting in further isolation

Physical abuse in CPA isn’t just a "phase" or a matter of poor parenting. It's a serious issue that demands attention, resources, and compassion. By breaking the silence and pushing for change, we can support families to move from crisis to stability. No parent should have to live in fear of their own child. It’s time to talk about this form of domestic abuse and ensure that those affected are heard, believed, and supported.

We are always here for you, no matter what.

To effectively address CPA, and especially the physical abuse involved, we must:

-Raise awareness that CPA is real and more common than many assume.

-Improve access to services for parents that are empathetic, non-judgmental, and trauma-informed.

-Educate professionals across sectors (social care, education, health) to recognize signs of CPA and respond appropriately.

-Challenge the stigma that prevents open conversation and early intervention

If you would like to find out more about our training packages and how you can help support families and parental figures experiencing CPA ,please click here .

Service Shoutout: Domestic Abuse Education

Tue, 20 May 2025 12:43:36 GMT

The Story Behind Domestic Abuse

Education

About Us: The Story Behind Domestic Abuse Education

Domestic Abuse Education (DAE) was founded by Sharon Livermore MBE after she survived abuse at the hands of her then husband. During that time, her workplace was the only place where she could find some degree of normality and independence. Yet no one recognised the signs. No one asked. After escaping the abuse and seeing her perpetrator sentenced to prison, Sharon realised something devastating: no one at work had been equipped to recognise what she was going through. That gap between what she needed and what her colleagues understood became the foundation for a national movement to change how workplaces approach domestic abuse.

Today, DAE supports businesses across the UK in becoming safer, more informed spaces for employees experiencing abuse. Sharon’s lived experience powers everything we do, and her story inspires real change in boardrooms, staffrooms and across entire organisations.

Why Domestic Abuse Education Exists

Domestic abuse is not just a private matter. It reaches into every part of a victim’s life — including work.

- 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men in the UK will experience domestic abuse.

- 75% of domestic abuse victims are targeted at work.

- 40% of abuse victims report being prevented from attending work.

For many victims, work may be the only place their abuser can’t follow. But that protection is fragile if employers don’t know how to spot the signs or what to do if someone discloses abuse.

DAE exists to fill that gap. Not only by supporting those already experiencing abuse but by helping prevent it in the first place. Our training doesn’t just equip people to respond to victim/survivors; it also helps individuals recognise early red flags. For some, learning about the tactics of coercive control or economic abuse for the first time may be what empowers them to leave before the situation escalates.

The Services We Offer

We work directly with employers, HR leaders, and line managers to help them support their people, both in-person and virtually.

Our services include:

- CPD-accredited training aimed at HR, Wellbeing Leads & Line Managers

- Custom policy development for domestic abuse support

- Lunch & Learn sessions, for all employees

- Workplace risk planning and resource kits

- Guest speaker or panellist at your event

- Access to downloadable templates, guides and helpline signposting

We also offer bespoke educational video content tailored to your team, with tools to help recognise, respond, and refer safely.

Why Our Training Works

What makes DAE different is Sharon’s voice, a real, lived experience that resonates deeply with attendees.

We don’t use case studies. We use truth.

Our approach creates a safe, respectful learning environment where people leave feeling confident, capable, and ready to support colleagues.

Don’t just take our word for it; every CPD session we’ve delivered has been rated five stars. “This was challenging, informative and inspiring. I left feeling empowered to have conversations I would have previously avoided.” — Attendee, DAE CPD Course.

The Impact on UK Workplaces

DAE has trained and supported businesses in finance, recruitment, local government, education, healthcare, tech, entertainment, police forces and more.

We’ve helped businesses:

- Build trust with their teams

- Reduce absenteeism and retention issues

- Protect employee wellbeing

- Create a safer, more inclusive culture

We’ve seen repeatedly that when people feel safe at work, they stay, grow, and thrive, even while facing challenges at home.

What We Believe

We believe that every workplace should have:

- A domestic abuse policy/guidance

- Trained points of contact

- Awareness built into staff training

- A culture that says: we will support you

Because while we can’t always stop domestic abuse from happening, we can change how people are treated when they speak up.

Join Us

We’ve helped organisations big and small take practical steps to support staff affected by domestic abuse. If you’re ready to do the same, we’re here to help you start.

Email Sharon and the team

Visit our website

View our upcoming CPD events

When we educate, we save lives.

PEGS Honoured at Shrewsbury Mayor’s Awards for Community Contribution

Mon, 19 May 2025 13:29:33 GMT

PEGS Honoured at Shrewsbury Mayor’s Awards for Community Contribution

We are absolutely delighted to share that PEGS has been recognised at the 2025 Shrewsbury Mayor’s Awards for our contribution to the local community.

This special event, held annually by Shrewsbury Town Council, honours individuals, organisations, and groups who go above and beyond to make a difference in the lives of others. Our Founding Director, Michelle, attended the awards ceremony on behalf of the PEGS team,

accepting the recognition with heartfelt pride and gratitude. “This award belongs to every member of the PEGS team,” Michelle shared on the night. “Each one of them brings empathy, dedication, and strength to everything we do. I’m so proud to stand alongside

such compassionate individuals who work tirelessly to support families experiencing child-to-parent abuse and coercive control. This recognition from our local community means the world to us.”

Being acknowledged among Shrewsbury’s local heroes is a huge honour. PEGS was founded to ensure that no parent, carer, or guardian feels isolated or silenced by the often-misunderstood dynamic of child-to-parent abuse. Since launching, we’ve grown into a national service—but our roots remain firmly planted in Shrewsbury, where the heart of our work continues to beat.

This award reflects not just what we do, but how we do it—with care, with persistence, and with the belief that change is always possible.

We want to thank Shrewsbury Town Council and the Mayor of Shrewsbury for this recognition. To be nominated and celebrated alongside so many inspiring individuals and organisations reminds us just how powerful community spirit can be. And most of all—thank you to the families who trust us to walk alongside them. You are our reason for showing up, every single day.

For more on the awards and this year’s winners, visit the Shrewsbury Mayor’s Awards 2025 recap .

Free Training for Warwickshire Professionals: Tackling Child to Parent Abuse with PEGS

Fri, 16 May 2025 15:08:27 GMT

Free Training for Warwickshire Professionals: Tackling Child to Parent Abuse with PEGS

Free Training for Warwickshire Professionals: Tackling Child to Parent Abuse with PEGS Professionals across Warwickshire now have the opportunity to access free, specialist training on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), thanks to funding from the Warwickshire Police and Crime

Commissioner Philip Seccombe.

Delivered by PEGS training team, this two-part training is designed to equip professionals with the knowledge and tools to identify and respond to this often-hidden form of abuse.

What Does the Training Cover?

The training is split into two key sessions:

1. Understanding Child to Parent Abuse 20th November, 9.30am – 12.30pm

This session introduces the dynamics, causes, and impacts of CPA, helping professionals recognise the signs and better understand the challenges families face.

2. PEGS Risk Awareness Model (PRAM) Training 16th December, 9.30am – 12.30pm

In this session, PEGS will guide attendees through PRAM – a practical tool developed to support identification and decision-making when dealing with CPA cases.

The second cohort of the training will be delivered on:

4. Understanding Child to Parent Abuse, 15th January, 9.30am – 12.30pm

This session introduces the dynamics, causes, and impacts of CPA, helping professionals recognise the signs and better understand the challenges families face.

PEGS Risk Awareness Model (PRAM) Training, 24th February, 9.30am – 12.30pm

In this session, PEGS will guide attendees through PRAM – a practical tool developed to support identification and decision-making when dealing with CPA cases.

All sessions will be delivered online via Zoom, ensuring easy access from anywhere within the

county.

This training is exclusively available to professionals working in Warwickshire. Thanks to full funding from the Warwickshire PCC, there is no cost to attend. Unfortunately, places are not available to those working outside the county.

Whether you're in education, social work, healthcare, youth services, or another frontline role, this training can help you make a meaningful difference in the lives of families affected by CPA. Places are limited and expected to fill quickly, so early registration is advised.

Michelle Becomes a PAWS Champion: Strengthening Our Understanding of Coercive Control and Companion Animal Abuse

Wed, 14 May 2025 10:31:36 GMT

Michelle Becomes a PAWS Champion: Strengthening Our Understanding of Coercive Control and

Companion Animal Abuse

Here at PEGS, we remain committed to deepening our understanding of coercive control and the many ways it presents in family dynamics. We're proud to share that our founding director, Michelle, has recently completed the PAWS Champions: Recognising & Responding to Companion Animal Abuse as a Tactic of Coercive Control training.

The session was delivered by Maya from SAHSDA – Safeguarding Animal & Human Survivors of

Sexual and Domestic Abuse, an organisation raising awareness of how companion animal abuse can be used as a form of manipulation, intimidation, and control within domestic and familial abuse.

What Is a PAWS Champion?

A PAWS Champion is someone who has been trained to:

-Recognise the signs of companion animal abuse when used as a method of coercion or

emotional control

-Understand the significant bond between people and their pets, and how this bond may be

exploited

-Respond sensitively and safely to concerns involving threats or harm to animals

-Work collaboratively with professionals across safeguarding, education, and animal welfare

sectors.

This training acknowledges that coercive control can take many forms and that companion animals are often caught in the middle.

At PEGS, we are increasingly hearing from parental figures about a concerning and often overlooked dynamic: children and young people using harm or threats to companion animals as a method of control.

Some describe pets being mistreated, used as leverage during conflict, or in heartbreaking

cases seriously harmed or killed.

These are incredibly difficult situations for families to navigate, filled with fear, guilt, and

uncertainty. The emotional impact on both the human and animal members of the family can be

profound.

Michelle’s participation in the PAWS Champions training reinforces PEGS’ trauma-informed approach and gives us greater tools to understand and respond to these complex and distressing behaviours. It also allows us to advocate more effectively for policies and support systems that take the role of companion animals into account.

We are grateful to Maya and SAHSDA for delivering such powerful and necessary training. As a PAWS Champion, Michelle will be sharing this knowledge across our team and community to help ensure that no form of coercion—whether directed at people or pets—goes unnoticed or unsupported.

If you’re a parent or carer experiencing this dynamic in your home, please know that PEGS is here to listen, believe, and support you. You're not alone.

A Message From A Foster Carer

Mon, 12 May 2025 12:25:16 GMT

A Foster Carer To A Foster Carer: This Foster Care Fortnight

Foster caring is an incredibly rewarding but also demanding journey. It requires immense patience, resilience, and the ability to show up for children and families in need, often when they’ve been through very difficult experiences.

Seeing a child thrive and grow because of the support and care you provide can be one of the most fulfilling parts of being a foster carer. There’s a unique satisfaction that comes from making a real difference in a child’s life, especially when they might not have had a stable or supportive environment before.

However Foster care can be emotionally and physically draining. Between managing challenging behaviours, dealing with complicated family dynamics, and meeting the child’s emotional needs, it can feel very overwhelming at times. Taking care of your own mental health is essential.

It's not easy, and there will be tough days, but your persistence and commitment are invaluable. It’s important to remember that progress can be slow and sometimes hard to see, but your efforts are always making a difference, even when it doesn't feel that way.

As a foster carer I know it is normal to feel scared, especially when faced with the unknown, whether that’s the emotional trauma of the children you're caring for or the complexities of the system. But every day you show up, you're helping create a brighter future for those children.

At the end of the day, you are making an amazing difference, and it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do it alone. There are support networks, both formal and informal, that can help you cope with the hard days and celebrate the good ones.

From every foster child, thank you your amazing.

PEGS to Host “Breaking the Silence” Conference on CPA Awareness Day

Thu, 01 May 2025 08:29:04 GMT

PEGS to Host “Breaking the Silence” Conference on CPA Awareness Day

We’re excited to invite you to register your interest for Breaking the Silence: A Multi-Agency Approach to Child to Parent Abuse and Safeguarding , hosted by PEGS in recognition of Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day.

This powerful conference will bring together professionals, experts by experience, and practitioners from across sectors to confront the silence surrounding Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) ; a complex and growing issue that is too often overlooked in policy, practice, and public discourse.

We will be looking into:

Raising awareness of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Share best practices from a multi-agency perspective

Explore safeguarding challenges and solutions

Highlight the voices of those with lived experience

Drive forward meaningful, collaborative change

Whether you work in social care, policing, education, health, youth services, or are connected to working with families who experience CPA in any way, this is a must-attend event for those committed to improving outcomes for families affected by CPA.

Register your interest now to be the first to receive updates, early bird access, and speaker announcements.
You can register your interest here

Let’s come together to break the silence and build safer, more informed responses for families experiencing CPA.

Service Shoutout: Oasis Domestic Abuse Service

Tue, 29 Apr 2025 14:20:42 GMT

Oasis Domestic Abuse Service: Transforming Lives Across Kent

For more than three decades, Oasis Domestic Abuse Service has been a vital lifeline for individuals and families experiencing domestic abuse across East Kent, Medway, and North Kent . As a well-established charity, Oasis is dedicated to delivering specialist support, advocacy, safe accommodation, and preventative education , all aimed at empowering survivors and breaking the cycle of abuse.

Oasis understands that no two situations are the same, and its services reflect a tailored, trauma-informed approach to support each person’s journey to safety and recovery. Key areas of provision include:

Oasis provides practical and emotional support to adults who are experiencing or have experienced domestic abuse. This includes:

Crisis intervention and safety planning
One-to-one casework
Group recovery programmes
Long-term mentoring and advocacy
Housing advice and legal support

These services aim to help adults move from crisis to stability, while developing the confidence and independence needed for long-term wellbeing.

Recognising the profound impact abuse can have on young lives, Oasis offers dedicated programmes for children and teenagers. These include:

Early intervention projects in schools and communities
Therapeutic mentoring and recovery programmes
Healthy relationship education
Family-based support for child survivors

Oasis works proactively to build resilience, support emotional wellbeing, and educate the next generation on consent, respect, and safety.

A cornerstone of Oasis’s work is its safe accommodation services . Refuge spaces are available for women and children escaping dangerous situations, providing:

Secure, confidential housing
On-site and outreach support staff
Help with rehousing, benefits, and resettlement
Children’s workers within refuges for tailored family support

Oasis also supports move-on housing and works with partners to ensure survivors can rebuild their lives in a stable, safe environment.

Oasis hosts One Stop Shop drop-in services , where individuals can access free, confidential advice from multiple agencies — including legal, housing, and domestic abuse professionals — in one place. These are essential hubs for those who may not yet be ready to engage with formal services but need immediate support.

Over the years, Oasis has supported thousands of individuals , advocating for those at risk and leading the way in integrated community-based responses to domestic abuse. The organisation is widely recognised for:

Collaborative working with schools, the police, housing, and healthcare professionals
Delivering early intervention to prevent crisis escalation
Building trauma-informed services rooted in safety, choice, and empowerment
Championing awareness campaigns and training to change cultural attitudes toward abuse

By continually adapting to the needs of the communities it serves, Oasis has become a trusted and essential part of Kent’s safeguarding landscape.

To find out more or to get support, visit the official site:
www.oasisdaservice.org

April Spotlight: Stalking and Harassment in Child-to-Parent Abuse

Mon, 28 Apr 2025 11:08:20 GMT

Understanding Stalking and Harassment in Child-to-Parent Abuse

Parental roles are often associated with nurturing, support, and protection. However, a growing concern that remains under-discussed is child-to-parent abuse (CPA), particularly when it manifests as stalking and harassment. These behaviours can be deeply distressing, leaving parents feeling trapped and unsupported. Understanding the signs, impacts, and potential interventions is crucial for parents navigating this difficult reality.

While child-to-parent abuse often includes physical and emotional abuse, it can also take more insidious forms, such as stalking and harassment. These behaviours can include:

Excessive monitoring: Constantly tracking a parent’s movements, demanding to know their whereabouts, or using technology to surveil them.

Persistent communication: Repeatedly sending messages, making excessive phone calls, or harassing through social media.

Intimidation and threats: Using coercion, blackmail, or threats to instil fear and maintain control.

Invasion of personal space: Entering a parent’s private spaces without permission, interfering with personal items, or disregarding boundaries.

Emotional manipulation: Guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or using psychological tactics to control parental behaviour.

Experiencing stalking or harassment from your own child can be emotionally complex. Parents often struggle with a mix of fear, guilt, and helplessness.

They may feel ashamed to seek help, fearing judgment or misunderstanding from others. The impacts can include:

Mental health strain: Increased stress, anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress symptoms.

Isolation: Withdrawing from social support due to embarrassment or fear of not being believed.

Financial strain: If the harassment extends to financial control or coercion.

Employment difficulties: Struggles with maintaining work due to stress, anxiety, or disruptions caused by the harassment.

Socialisation challenges: Difficulty engaging in social activities or maintaining relationships due to fear, stress, or coercion.

Physical health decline: Sleep disturbances, headaches, and other stress-related symptoms. Parents often struggle with a mix of fear, guilt, and helplessness.

Our recent survey on adult children who are abusing their parents, revealed that 29% of parental figures are being tracked by their child. You can read the report here .

If you or someone you know is experiencing stalking and harassment, support is available from specialist services . You are not alone, and help is available.

National Stalking Helpline – 0808 802 0300 (Provided by the Suzy Lamplugh Trust)

Paladin National Stalking Advocacy Service – www.paladinservice.co.uk

Victim Support – 0808 168 9111 (Free, confidential support for victims of crime)

Refuge Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0808 2000 247 (For those experiencing domestic abuse, including coercive control)

Samaritans – 116 123 (24/7 support for those struggling with emotional distress)

PEGS Founding Director to speak at Liverpool Conference on Domestic Abuse

Fri, 25 Apr 2025 08:30:57 GMT

Michelle to give key note at Domestic Abuse Conference

We’re proud to announce that our founder and director, Michelle John, will be taking to the stage at this year’s Domestic Abuse Conference in Liverpool, offering vital insight into a subject that’s still too often overlooked – child to parent abuse (CPA).

Taking place on Thursday 19th June at the Hilton Hotel, the conference brings together professionals and experts from across the UK to take a 360° view on tackling domestic abuse in all its forms. Organised by Morecrofts Solicitors and supported by Torus Foundation, the event promises a day of thought-provoking discussion, lived experience, and practical solutions.

Michelle will be speaking on behalf of PEGS to highlight the realities of child to parent abuse – a complex and frequently misunderstood form of domestic abuse that affects thousands of families each year. Drawing on her experience working directly with over 5,000 parents and training more than 2,000 professionals (including police forces and frontline workers), Michelle will offer a powerful voice for those living with abuse from their child.

Her talk will explore the barriers parents face when seeking support, the importance of professional understanding and empathy, and how organisations across sectors can work together to create lasting change. She’ll also share examples of how PEGS has influenced national policy and regional practice – including our instrumental role in the creation of the UK’s first regional CPA policy in Mid and West Wales, which has since been used as a blueprint elsewhere.

Michelle will be speaking alongside a host of incredible voices, including Serena Kennedy (Merseyside Police’s first female Chief Constable), Emma Pickering from Refuge, and consultant psychotherapist Dr Ged Smith. Topics covered on the day will range from tech-facilitated abuse and the experiences of survivors, to the often-unspoken effects of domestic abuse on family pets.

We’re incredibly proud that Michelle will be representing PEGS at such a significant event, continuing to raise awareness of CPA and ensuring that more professionals feel confident and capable when supporting families in this situation.

If you’d like to attend the conference or find out more, you can book your place here .

Something for You: Booklet

Thu, 24 Apr 2025 09:31:32 GMT

Something for You Booklet

We’re honoured to share with you something we’ve been quietly creating ,a gentle resource " Something for You Booklet.", made with you in mind.

There is no roadmap for what you may be experiencing, and often finding time or space for yourself can feel impossible. That’s why we created this booklet ,as a small quiet plac e just for you.

Inside, you’ll find:

Gentle words of encouragement
Small suggestions for selfcare
Journaling prompts, if and when you feel ready
Affirmations to remind you that you matter

Interactive and empowering tasks

There’s no right way to use this. You might read one page today, and nothing tomorrow and that’s okay. This is not a to-do list. It’s simply something for you to lean on, revisit, or hold close when you need it most.

You can access it anytime, from anywhere. Quietly. Privately. Safely.

Please take your time with it. Be kind to yourself and know that you matter.

Feel free to download our 'Something For You' Booklet below:

Celebrating 5 Years of PEGS: A Milestone Moment

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 11:34:51 GMT

Celebrating 5 Years of PEGS: A Milestone Moment

On 21st March, we marked a special occasion, PEGS turned five !

Reaching this milestone is something we’re incredibly proud of, and we couldn’t let it pass without celebrating the journey, the impact, and the incredible people who’ve been part of it all.

To mark the occasion, we held a celebration in our office , not just to recognise five years of PEGS, but to reflect on the meaningful work that’s been achieved during that time. There was plenty of coffee, cake, and conversation, but most importantly, we shared heartfelt messages from parents about how PEGS and our team have made a difference in their lives.

March was a busy month for PEGS. We’ve seen a huge increase in awareness, more media coverage, and a rapidly growing demand for our free services and workshops. We’ve now supported over 10,000 referrals , a number that speaks volumes about the need for continued awareness and action around Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). Without forgetting that during April 1st - April 9th we had over an 112% increase, which is over 220 referrals processed in 9 days.

We’re incredibly honoured to have the ongoing support of the amazing organisations and individuals who’ve stood by us from the very beginning. Your partnership, encouragement, and belief in what we do has helped us grow from a small organisation into a nationally recognised voice for parental figures affected by CPA.

Throughout the week, we shared some of the wonderful celebratory messages we received across our social channels, and we can’t thank you enough for your kind words and continued encouragement.

As we look ahead to the future, our mission remains the same: supporting parental figures, raising awareness of CPA, and driving change in regional and national policies. From day one, that’s been our focus and none of it would have been possible without your support, your listening ears, and your shared understanding of why this work matters.

From all of us at PEGS, thank you for being part of our journey.

Here’s to the next five years and beyond!

Stress Awareness Month

Wed, 16 Apr 2025 14:01:28 GMT

Stress Awareness Month

Taking Care of Yourself During Stress Awareness Month

April is Stress Awareness Month, a time to reflect on stress , how it affects us, and, most importantly how we can manage it better. If you’ve experienced child-to-parent abuse (CPA), you know that stress can feel overwhelming and constant. It’s so important to realise that you’re not alone, and there are ways to take care of yourself while navigating these experiences.

Understanding Stress and Child-to-Parent Abuse

Experiencing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) can bring a mix of emotions—frustration, sadness, guilt and fear. It’s important to remind yourself that none of this is your fault. CPA is a complex issue, and Stress Awareness Month is a great opportunity to pause and focus on your wellbeing, and most importantly you. No matter what your situation is, you matter.

Small Ways to Reduce Stress

You don’t need to make massive changes. Sometimes, little things can make a big difference. Here are a few wellbeing techniques to help you manage stress or other emotions:

Breathing exercises – When you’re feeling overwhelmed, take a deep breath in for four seconds, hold for four seconds, and breathe out for four seconds. Repeat a few times. It’s a simple way to calm your nervous system. There are many videos online which can provide support with this.

Mindful moments – Find small pockets of time to check in with yourself. Whether it’s a quiet cup of tea, listening to your favorite song, or just stepping outside for fresh air, these moments can help reset your mind. Remember, because you matter .

Movement – You don’t have to hit the gym, but moving your body in ways you enjoy walking, stretching, dancing in your kitchen,can all help release stress.

Stepping Back – This is important. It’s okay to step back. Stepping back isn't selfish, it's necessary for your wellbeing. Because you matter.

Reaching out – You don’t have to go through this alone. Talking to someone who understands, whether it’s a support group, a therapist, or a trusted friend, can make a world of difference. Only if this is safe to do so.

Finding Support and Being Kind to Yourself

Stress Awareness Month’s theme this year is #LeadWithLove , which is all about showing kindness to yourself and others. That includes giving yourself permission to rest, recognizing your own strength, and letting go of any guilt you may be carrying.

Stress is a natural response to situations and experiences, but it doesn’t have to take over. By taking small steps toward selfcare and reaching out for support when you need it, you can begin to manage stress in a healthier way, or a way that suits you. This Stress Awareness Month, let’s focus on self-compassion, breathing through the moments, and reminding ourselves that we are not alone. Because, you matter

The Stress Management Society provide some fantastic online resources which could come in handy, for more information please visit: https://www.stress.org.uk/stress-awareness-month-2025/

Sky and ITV Coverage on Child to Parent Abuse

Mon, 14 Apr 2025 14:50:33 GMT

ITV and Sky News 03/25

**TRIGGER WARNING, please take care as some of the content below can be upsetting**

Child to parent abuse (CPA) remains one of the most difficult and least spoken about forms of domestic abuse. It’s a form that carries emotional weight, stigma, and for many families - silence. That’s why recent coverage by both ITV and Sky News has been so important.

The stories shared by these platforms are raw and heartbreaking. Both ITV and Sky highlighted the lived experiences of parents anonymously.

It’s encouraging to see national broadcasters giving space to raise awareness on Child to Parent abuse. Coverage like this validates what many parents are experiencing behind closed doors and may help others feel less alone. It gives language to something that’s often shrouded in guilt and shame, and it opens the door to more honest conversations and access to support.

But alongside this progress is sadness. It’s heartbreaking that so many families are living in fear, unsure where to turn, and battling assumptions that prevent them from seeking help or support. These stories aren’t just “news”, they’re the lived experiences of real individuals who need empathy, understanding, and resources.

We hope that the awareness raised by Sky and ITV leads to a time where parents can speak out without fear of judgment, and where support systems become more accessible and compassionate for those experiencing CPA.

Below are the videos and reports by Sky and ITV please take care if you watch the report:

ITV: https://www.itv.com/news/granada/2025-04-07/my-son-only-stopped-attacking-me-when-he-heard-my-husbands-car

Sky: https://news.sky.com/story/parents-of-boy-whose-outbursts-left-them-fearing-for-their-lives-say-adolescence-touched-a-nerve-13341108

Parental figures experiences of adult child to parent abuse

Sat, 12 Apr 2025 09:14:45 GMT

The Silent Suffering: When Parents Are Abused by Their Adult Children

When we think of domestic abuse, we often imagine intimate partners or spouse who are displaying abusive behaviours. But what if the person is your own adult child? It's a reality many are living through silently—and one that PEGS is working tirelessly to bring into the light.

In our latest report, we surveyed 100 parental figures experiencing abuse from adult children, aged 18 and over. The results were heart-breaking and eye-opening.

Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) doesn’t end when a child turns 18. In fact, it can often escalate. Our data shows:

98% of respondents experience daily verbal abuse.
25% are physically assaulted each month.
91% report property damage.
82% have been victims of false allegations.
47% say their child has also abused a partner.

The abuse goes beyond the home. Pets are being hurt or killed, family members intimidated, and parents publicly humiliated. And still, most suffer in silence—because society rarely talks about it.

There is no single profile for a parent experiencing CPA. They are mothers and fathers, married and single, employed and retired. The overwhelming majority in our survey were women (99%), and most were aged 46–55. The abuse spanned years, often beginning in childhood and persisting well into adulthood.

The mental toll on parental figures is alarming with

100% of respondents say their emotional wellbeing has been negatively impacted.
94% feel stressed.
96% feel isolated.
80% have had friends or family cut ties because of their situation.

Even more concerning, many are afraid to reach out for help. 91% considered contacting a professional but changed their mind due to fear of being blamed or having their child prosecuted. Over half said they’d previously been threatened with neglect charges when seeking support prior to their child turning 18. With only 9% of cases being heard at MARACs, it just shows how many parental figures are falling through the gaps.

This report is a sobering reminder of why PEGS exists. We are committed to:

Raising awareness about adult-child-to-parent abuse.
Providing practical and emotional support for parental figures.
Training professionals to recognize and respond effectively.
Influencing policy to formally recognise CPA within domestic abuse frameworks.

The pain shared in this report is real—but so is the strength. Every voice we amplify brings us one step closer to change.

Let’s make sure no parent has to suffer in silence.

Download the full report below

Rising Voices, Growing Need: A 112% Surge in Referrals Highlights the Urgent Demand for CPA Support

Fri, 11 Apr 2025 10:59:49 GMT

Rising Voices, The Growing Need:

At PEGS, we exist to support, uplift and advocate for parental figures navigating the deeply complex

and often isolating experience of child-to-parent abuse (CPA). Every parent who reaches out is met

with compassion, understanding and a belief that their voice deserves to be heard. And now, more

voices than ever are reaching out.

Between the 1st and 9th of April 2025, PEGS saw a 112% increase in referrals compared to the same

period in 2024.

This is not just a number. It represents mothers, fathers, carers and guardians who are asking for

help, many for the first time, some after years of silently coping. It shows growing awareness, yes,

but also a clear and urgent demand for more support, more understanding, and more space to be

heard.

We are proud to be a not-for-profit organisation, meaning every penny and every ounce of energy

goes back into supporting the people who need us. But this dramatic rise in referrals brings with it

very real pressures on our small, dedicated team.

We are navigating increasing demand on our one-to-one services, our wellbeing sessions, and our

drop-ins. We’re fielding more requests for training, advice, advocacy, and crisis support than ever

before. And we’re doing all of this while managing limited resources, limited capacity and a

growing waiting list of parents who are desperately looking for support.

We do this work because we care. Because we know what it’s like. Because we’re a lived experience

organisation , and we’ve been where many of these parents are now. But we can’t do it alone.

The rise in referrals is a sign that more families are recognising CPA for what it is: a real, painful and

often misunderstood form of domestic abuse. But unless we can increase our capacity, there’s a risk

that those who reach out may have to wait longer for the support they urgently need.

That’s why we’re calling on our community, supporters, professionals and partners to stand with

us, so we can grow with the need, not fall behind it.

How You Can Help?

Whether you're an individual, a business, a professional or someone who simply believes in our

mission—there are so many ways to get involved:

Make a donation – Every contribution, big or small, makes a tangible difference to our

ability to offer support.

Fundraise for us – From sponsored walks to community coffee mornings, your creativity can

directly fuel our services.

Partner with us – We welcome corporate partnerships, payroll giving schemes, and charity

of the year nominations.

Raise awareness – Share our posts, talk about CPA, and help us break the silence around

child-to-parent abuse.

Volunteer your skills – From admin to social media, or from well-being to events, your time

can go a long way.

Advocate – If you work in a school, healthcare, social care, policing or community setting,

consider our training or signpost parents to our services.

Together , We Can Meet This Moment

This 112% increase is not just a statistic, t’s a message. Parents are speaking out. They are asking

for help. And now, more than ever, PEGS needs to be there to answer that call.

Let’s make sure no parent feels alone.

Let’s make sure every voice is heard.

Let’s grow the support to match the need.

To donate, get involved, or find out more: www.pegsupport.co.uk

Or connect with us on social media @pegs_support

PATCH – Passionate Adopters Targeting Change

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Fri, 04 Apr 2025 10:47:35 GMT

PATCH – Passionate Adopters Targeting Change –

Was founded because too many families are being failed. Adoption is often framed as a happy

ending, where a child is placed in a safe home and left to thrive. But trauma does not

disappear with adoption. When it is ignored, the wounds deepen.

Why Trauma Cannot Be an Afterthought in Adoption

Our social care system is designed to assess risk and remove children from

harm, but it does not prioritise what happens next. There is no structured plan for

recovery. There is no formal requirement to assess the impact of trauma or ensure

families have the right support to help a child heal. The result?

- Children struggle . Their trauma is dismissed or misunderstood until it

escalates.

- Families collapse . Support is reactive, delayed, or non-existent.

- Blame replaces help . Adopters are scrutinised instead of supported.

-Public money is wasted . Crisis responses cost far more than early

intervention.

This is not a failure of parenting . This is a failure of system design .

Why Would Anyone Step Into This System?

Adopters, foster carers, and kinship carers open their homes with the intention of

giving children stability, care, and the chance to recover. But too often, the reality is

far from what they were led to expect.

Instead of being supported, many adopters find themselves blamed for system

failures:

- Trauma is misunderstood, but parents are judged. When a child’s past trauma

manifests as distress, aggression, or extreme behaviours, adopters are told they are

“not coping” instead of being offered meaningful support.

- Requests for help are treated as risks. When families seek intervention, they

are often met with scrutiny rather than solutions. Adopters asking for help are

assessed, not assisted.

- There is no recovery plan, but families are expected to cope . A child is

placed, and adopters are left to manage complex trauma without structured, long-

term planning.

When trauma is not understood, families struggle alone. When families struggle

alone, placement breakdowns increase. When placements fail, children suffer

more rejection.

It is no surprise that fewer people are stepping forward. Who would willingly enter a

system where they are set up to fail? If adopters, foster carers, and kinship carers

are expected to hold trauma, the system must hold them. Right now, it does not.

The Fundamental Failing: Trauma is Not Prioritised

The system continues to overlook one simple truth: removal is not recovery.

Children who have experienced abuse, neglect, or instability do not simply “heal”

because they are now in a safe home. Trauma does not resolve with time. It does

not disappear when a child has fresh clothes and a warm bed. Without intervention,

trauma remains. It shapes behaviour, identity, relationships, and long-term stability.

Yet, the system does not require:

-A structured trauma assessment for every child entering permanence.

-A mapped recovery plan that follows the child, not just placement changes.

-A consistent trauma-informed approach in education, social care, and mental

health services.

Instead, families are left to navigate this alone—until crisis hits. Then, the response

is blame, not support.

Blame is Not a Support Strategy

Adopters, foster carers, and kinship carers do not fail because they are not

resilient enough . They fail because they are not supported enough.

-Parenting courses are offered in the middle of trauma breakdown —ignoring the

root issue.

-Families are told to “manage” when they have no access to specialist help .

-Adopters are assessed for their parenting, rather than the child’s trauma

history.

This approach is not neutral—it is harmful. It isolates families, pushes children into

further instability, and fails to uphold the right to recovery.

Balancing Humanity with Accountability in Social Work

PATCH believes in compassionate, ethical, and evidence-based social work.

Social care must balance kindness with accountability—one should not cancel out

the other.

✅ Risk must be recognised early and acted upon proportionately.

✅ Support must be embedded into intervention, not an afterthought.

✅ Difficult conversations should lead to meaningful change, not blame.

A system that fails to acknowledge trauma fails the children it is meant to protect.

Being trauma-informed does not mean being passive—it means acting with

knowledge, understanding, and responsibility.

Social Workers Are Not the Problem – The System Is

Most social workers enter the profession with a deep commitment to helping others.

They are trained to intervene in crisis, advocate for vulnerable children, and

support families.

So, what has gone wrong?

The failure is not with individual social workers. It is with a system that is:

-Overloaded with cases

-Constrained by rigid policies

-Suffocated by bureaucracy

-Stripped of the financial resources to implement real interventions

Social workers are not empowered to use professional judgement. They are forced

to tick boxes , meet deadlines , and follow processes that do not serve families or

children.

Meanwhile, Local Authorities celebrate performance targets, while families and

frontline professionals are unheard.

-Social work must evolve .

-Trauma must be acknowledged .

-Systems must stop managing crisis and start preventing it .

What Needs to Change

PATCH is not about blame—it is about solutions. The fundamental failing of this

system is the absence of a structured trauma recovery process . The response

must be clear:

- Trauma assessments must be embedded into permanence planning.

Without assessment, there is no foundation for recovery.

- Trauma-responsive support must be standard . Families cannot be left to

navigate complex trauma alone. This is a clinical issue, not just a parenting

challenge.



- Social care must shift from crisis management to proactive planning.

- The system cannot continue waiting for failure before responding.

- Psychological expertise must be embedded in practice. The current

system operates without the right lens—trauma is misunderstood,

mismanaged, and dismissed.

- Stop treating adopters and carers as disposable . If people step forward to

raise, protect, and support vulnerable children, the system must stand with

them, not against them.

If Trauma is Not Mapped, It Cannot Be Repaired.

-If it is not supported, it will escalate.

-If it escalates, families will collapse.

-If families collapse, children will face more rejection.

-If children are failed, society pays the cost.

This is the failure.

This is what must change.

Where PATCH Stands

PATCH was founded by Fiona Wells—an adopter, adoptee, and social

worker—to challenge a broken system. We are a collective of families,

professionals, and adoptees who refuse to stay silent about the systemic failings

we live with.

-Our experiences must be acknowledged , validated, and seen .

-Harmful practices that push families into crisis must be exposed.

-Psychological thinking must be embedded in policy, not optional.

We are stating what is missing —not for debate, but because the cost of inaction is

too high. Children and families are being set up to fail by a system that does not

recognise what recovery requires.

This is not a difficult fix—it is a necessary one.

March Spotlight: Coercion and Control

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Fri, 28 Mar 2025 11:51:48 GMT

Understanding Coercion and Control in Child-to-Parent Abuse

Child-to-parent abuse is a deeply challenging and often hidden issue, with 85% of our parents’

reporting experiences of coercion and control. This form of abuse can be emotionally,

psychologically, and even physically devastating. Understanding coercive control and recognising its

signs is essential for empowering parents to seek support and reclaim their safety, wellbeing and

confidence.

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour where someone personally connected to you repeatedly

acts in ways that make you feel controlled, dependent, isolated, humiliated, or scared. While often

discussed in the context of domestic abuse between partners, coercive control is increasingly

recognised as a significant factor in child-to-parent abuse.

For parents, this can mean feeling trapped in a cycle of fear, unable to set boundaries or parent

effectively due to ongoing manipulation and intimidation from their child.

Coercive control can manifest in many ways, including:

Isolation: Preventing you from seeing friends and family or discouraging you from seeking

help.

Financial Control: Dictating how much money you have, how you spend it, or even stealing

from you.

Humiliation & Degradation: Insulting, belittling, or shaming you to lower your confidence

and self-worth.

Monitoring & Surveillance: Keeping track of your movements, phone activity, or social

interactions.

Threats & Intimidation: Threatening to harm or kill you, others, or pets to maintain control.

Emotional Blackmail: Threatening to share personal information or making false allegations

unless demands are met.

Destruction of Property: Damaging your belongings or home as a form of punishment or

control.

Gaslighting : Making you doubt your own perception of reality, questioning your memory or

feelings.

Forced Criminal Activity: Coercing you into illegal acts against your will.

Blame-Shifting: Justifying their behaviour by blaming you, e.g ; 'If you did what I wanted, I

wouldn’t have to act this way'

Living with coercive and controlling behaviours can leave parents feeling exhausted, anxious, and

powerless. Many experience guilt and shame, believing they have failed as parents. However, it is

vital to recognise that no parent deserves to live in fear, and seeking support is not a sign of

weakness—it is an act of strength.

Coercion and control in child-to-parent abuse is a difficult reality, but with awareness of the signs

and impact for parental figures, professionals can help parents to regain their strength and

confidence.

If you are experiencing this form of behaviour, remember: this is not your fault, help is available and

if PEGS is right for you, there are various support options we can offer.

Service Shout Out: Flag DV

Wed, 26 Mar 2025 10:37:05 GMT

This Months Service Shout Out goes to Flag DV!

Domestic abuse is an issue that affects families across the UK, regardless of gender, age, race, or background. However, despite its impact, many individuals feel trapped, unsure of how to seek help or where to turn for support.

Flag DV is a charity that has been providing support to individuals of domestic abuse since it started in 2012. Created to fill the gap left by the reduction in legal aid services, the organisation offers free, confidential family law legal advice to those experiencing domestic abuse.

“Our mission is to empower and support those who have experienced domestic abuse by providing them with free, confidential family law legal advice. We strive to raise awareness of their legal rights and options. We endeavour to work in collaboration with other organisations and government agencies to ensure that domestic abuse victims have access to the resources and support they need to make informed choices about escaping abuse and rebuilding their lives.”

What Flag DV Does: Empowering Survivors with Legal Support

The core aim of Flag DV is to provide individuals experiencing domestic abuse with access to free legal advice and support. By offering legal guidance from volunteer solicitors, legal executives, and barristers who specialise in Family Law, the charity helps individuals to navigate the often complex and overwhelming legal system.

Those who have experienced domestic abuse often face many obstacles when considering leaving abuse. Flag DV’s legal team is there to offer clarity, support, and advice on how to safely take action, whether that involves divorce or separation, child custody arrangements, or understanding the intricacies of domestic abuse protection orders.

The charity operates across Berkshire, Buckinghamshire, Oxfordshire, and Hampshire, supporting individuals over the age of 18, regardless of gender, sexual orientation, race, or religion. Importantly, Flag DV ensures that its services are accessible to everyone, offering both telephone and face-to-face legal advice sessions depending on individual needs. What makes Flag DV stand out is that all their legal advice sessions are provided free of charge. Volunteer professionals offer their expertise to ensure survivors understand their rights, their options, and the steps they can take to regain safety and autonomy in their lives.

Family Court Support: Vital Assistance When Navigating the Legal System

One of the most unique and essential services that Flag DV offers is its Family Court Support programme. Currently available in Berkshire, this service provides ongoing, one-to-one assistance to individuals involved in legal proceedings related to domestic abuse.

“Our Family Court Support Worker plays an essential role in guiding individuals through the complexities of the family court system. They provide practical assistance by helping clients understand court procedures, explaining what to expect in the courtroom, facilitating requests for special measures, and clarifying the meaning and application of court documents.”

A Commitment to Making a Difference

Since its founding, Flag DV has been committed to making a tangible difference in the lives of those affected by domestic abuse. The charity’s impact is evident in the countless individuals it has helped over the years, offering a lifeline to those who may have otherwise been unable to navigate the legal complexities of escaping abuse.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, Flag DV is here to help. Their free legal advice, court support, and collaborative approach make them a vital resource for anyone looking to break free from abuse.

For more information or to access support, visit Flag DV

Debt awareness week

Mon, 24 Mar 2025 15:21:54 GMT

Debt Awareness and Child-to-Parent Abuse: Breaking the Cycle

Debt Awareness Week serves as a vital opportunity to highlight financial struggles and encourage individuals to seek support. While debt can affect anyone, parents experiencing child-to-parent abuse often face unique financial challenges, including coercive control over money, forced borrowing, and financial manipulation. Understanding the connection between debt and child-to-parent abuse can empower parents to take steps towards financial and emotional recovery.

Financial abuse is a key element of coercive control and is increasingly seen in cases of child-to-parent abuse. Parents may find themselves pressured into giving money, taking out loans, or covering costs for their child against their will. Over time, this can lead to overwhelming debt, financial instability, and emotional distress.

Common signs of financial abuse in child-to-parent abuse include:

Forced Borrowing: Parents being coerced into taking out loans, credit cards, or payday loans for their child.
Control Over Finances: A child demanding access to bank accounts, benefits, or wages.
Unpaid Debts: Parents accumulating debt due to their child’s spending or lifestyle choices.
Threats and Manipulation: A child using emotional blackmail, threats, or intimidation to obtain money.
Destruction of Property: Breaking valuable belongings to force parents into financial submission.
Fear of Repercussions: Parents feeling unable to refuse financial demands due to the threat of aggression or false accusations.

For many parents, financial abuse leads to not only debt but also significant stress, anxiety, and isolation. The fear of losing financial security, coupled with emotional manipulation, can make it difficult to seek help or set boundaries.

Parents may experience:

A loss of financial independence.
Guilt and shame for struggling with debt.
A sense of helplessness in their own home.
Fear of confronting their child about financial issues.
Difficulty accessing financial assistance due to coercion or lack of control over their own funds.

If you are struggling with debt or experiencing financial abuse, the following UK organisations can provide free and confidential advice:

StepChange Debt Charity ( www.stepchange.org ) – Provides expert debt advice and solutions to help you regain control.
National Debtline ( www.nationaldebtline.org ) – A free and confidential debt advice service.
Citizens Advice ( www.citizensadvice.org.uk ) – Offers financial guidance and support for those dealing with financial and emotional abuse.
MoneyHelper ( www.moneyhelper.org.uk ) – A government-backed service offering free money and debt advice.

Financial abuse within child-to-parent abuse can feel isolating, but support is available. Seeking help for debt and coercive control is a courageous step towards regaining financial and emotional freedom. By raising awareness and breaking the silence, we can help parents rebuild their confidence and stability.

If you are experiencing financial coercion or abuse, reach out to trusted support services such as us here at PEGS or the services above.

Thu, 20 Mar 2025 16:58:41 GMT

Open letter from our Founding Director

Dear reader,

Every year on PEGS' anniversary, I take time to reflect, put fingers to the keyboard, and share the lessons, challenges, and successes of our journey. This year is no different.

Six years ago, my family and I needed help—but we were failed by professionals, organisations, and the system itself. We were unseen, unheard, unsupported. Time and again, I was told, “You’re not the only family,” but when I asked, “Who is supporting these families?” I was met with silence. I knew something had to change. So, I turned my pain into power to empower others, and PEGS was born—starting with nothing more than a Google document, an idea, and no funding.

Never did I expect PEGS to grow so quickly, to become so visible, to be such a rollercoaster of learning, challenges, and change. And while I advocate tirelessly for parents, carers, and guardians, I have always maintained a boundary: I do not publicly discuss my own lived experience. My family’s privacy is paramount, and they alone have the right to share their story, should they choose. No one should have to ‘bleed for the cause’—"No” is a full sentence, and those with lived experience deserve to have their no respected.

Sadly, throughout PEGS’ journey, my experience has been used against me. I have been questioned—“Who are you to run an organisation?”, “ Just because you have lived experience, it does not mean you know what families want or need” —and my team, who are simply incredible, have faced scrutiny over their ability to support families, both publicly and behind closed doors. I have even had parts of my experience shared publicly without my knowledge or consent. Five years on, the negativity still lingers, but I’ve learned an important lesson: not everyone can be trusted. Instead of letting this hold me back, I’ve channelled that energy into the work that truly matters—supporting those who need us.

Five years ago, PEGS was just me, wearing every hat, doing every job. Some roles I excelled at, others—not so much (let’s just say I’m grateful for those handling finance and social media!). Now, PEGS has a passionate team dedicated to supporting those impacted by CPA. We have become trusted partners of NHS Safeguarding for England, created a free employer covenant backed by the Department for Work and Pensions, and continue to strengthen partnerships across sectors.

We have worked alongside organisations, local authorities, and entire regions to implement training, protocols, and policy. A shining example is Mid and West Wales, where, through collaboration with partner agencies and those with lived experience, a regional response to CPA now exists—spanning four local authorities, two health boards, various organisations, services, and police. Our PRAM model is operational here too, thanks to the unwavering support of Nat Handcock, her team, and Dafydd Llewelyn, Police Crime Commissioner for Dyfed Powys.

Looking back, I am immensely proud of how far PEGS has come. We have supported over 8,500 parents, carers, and guardians, receiving around 300 referrals per month, some months this we have received in excess of 500. The biggest challenge remains: capacity versus demand. We have adapted, launched new services, and even reduced our media presence, but the need continues to grow—both across the UK and internationally, proving just how little support is available.

Our advocacy has shaped national policy. We contributed to the Domestic Abuse Act 2021, ensuring CPA was included in statutory guidance. In 2022, we launched Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day (14th October), now recognised internationally. We have held our own events, presented at conferences, campaigned, championed others in the sector, and challenged poor responses when needed.

Despite this progress, we still hear the phrase: “Lessons have been learned.” Yet, we see the same lessons being relearned. Parents, carers, and guardians continue to be blamed, ignored, and silenced. Tragically, some have lost their lives—lives that could have been saved. These individuals live in plain sight within our communities, yet their suffering remains hidden because the person displaying abusive behaviours is their child or grandchild. CPA is where domestic abuse was in the 1960s and 70s—we must work together to drive real change. CPA must be included in policies, forums, and meetings. Parents, carers, and guardians must be placed at the centre of conversations—not because they matter more, but because they matter too.

I remain as determined as ever to bring CPA out of the shadows and amplify the voices of those experiencing it. But these achievements are not mine alone. PEGS would not be where it is without the unwavering dedication of our team and partners. To the PEGS team—you are the driving force behind change. You believe in this mission, and I am beyond proud of you. Thank you for standing with me, for embracing this vision, and for fighting for those who need us. Each of you is an essential part of this puzzle.

To everyone who has supported PEGS along the way—raising awareness, offering guidance, or simply standing with us—please know that I see you, and I appreciate you.

I wish there were no need for PEGS. I wish CPA didn’t exist. But until parents, carers, and guardians no longer need us, until missed opportunities stop happening, and until the same lessons stop being relearned, we will be here—pushing for change, raising awareness, and ensuring no one faces this alone.

Here’s to the next 5 years – I hope you will join us

All my love,

Michelle xxx

Join Our Team at PEGS

Fri, 14 Mar 2025 08:49:27 GMT

PEGS is looking for new team members

At PEGS, we are committed to supporting families affected by Child to Parent Abuse (CPA). As our organisation continues to grow, we are excited to announce new opportunities to join our dedicated team.

We are currently recruiting for the following roles:

2 Child to Parent Abuse Practitioners 15 hours per week

1 Administration and HR Role 20 hours per week

These roles will be required to work from our head office in Shropshire

If you are passionate about making a difference and want to be part of a supportive, forward-thinking team, we would love to hear from you!

Job descriptions and specifications can be downloaded below, closing date is the 31st March at 5pm. We may however, close for applications earlier if we receive a high number of applicants

�� To apply, please send your CV to admin@pegsupport.com .

Join us in our mission to support families and create lasting change.

Celebrating International Women’s Day 2025

Thu, 06 Mar 2025 11:24:34 GMT

Celebrating International Women’s Day 2025: Empowering the Next Generation

International Women’s Day (IWD) is a time to celebrate the achievements of women, raise awareness of gender equality, and inspire the next generation to continue striving for progress. As parents, caregivers, and educators, we play a crucial role in shaping the attitudes and beliefs of young minds. This year, on March 8, 2025, we invite you to take a moment to reflect on the incredible women in your life and to share their stories with your children.

IWD is not just a day to acknowledge historical progress; it’s a reminder of the work still to be done. In a world where gender disparities persist, our role as parents and educators is to teach our children the importance of respect, inclusion, and empowerment. By instilling these values early on, we can help create a future where equality is not just an aspiration but a reality.

This year, let’s make a conscious effort to celebrate the women we know who are doing incredible things. Whether it’s a mother balancing work and family, a teacher shaping young minds, a doctor saving lives, or a community leader making a difference, every woman’s contribution deserves recognition.

At PEGS, we are so privileged to know, work alongside and champion both directly and from afar, some of the most incredible women who are doing equally incredible things for their communities and our society. Every single one of these women are our leaders of today alongside encouraging and supporting our women leaders of the future.

To celebrate those we follow, our connections, their work, and the inspiration they provide, we want to dedicate this blog to them.

Sharon Livermore MBE, Founder of Domestic Abuse Education, Cambridgeshire

https://domesticabuseeducation.co.uk/

Arlene Mensah, Senior Lead Survivor Voice at Standing Together

http://www.standingtogether.org.uk/

Chelsea Smith, Smart recovery leader, Pembrokeshire

https://smartrecovery.org.uk/about-smart-recovery-meetings/

Stacey Runciman, Female Future Society and VODAS, Ipswich

https://www.futurefemalesociety.org/

Ayse Adil, CEO Re-mind services and Family based solutions

https://familybasedsolutions.org.uk/home/about-us/

Sarah Taylor, survivor and advocate.

https://sarahtaylorcollaborationsstampingoutpostseparationabuse.co.uk/

Meena Kumari, Founder of Hope training

https://hopetraining.co.uk/about/

Rebecca Zerk, Dewis choice, Aberystwyth University

https://dewischoice.org.uk/

Kate Fejfer – Director of Shropshire European Organisation, Shropshire

https://www.facebook.com/polishcentreshrewsbury/?locale=en_GB

Dr Sally Olewe-Richards Founder of Women of Wisdom and Courage

https://womenofwisdomandcourage.com/

Lee Tempest Child to Parent Violence and Abuse (CPVA) Lead VisAble, New Zealand

https://www.visable.co.nz/

Lisa James, Director and Manager of Diverse Support, Pembrokeshire

https://www.diversesupportpembrokeshire.co.uk/

Emily Mitchell, CEO at Rise Strong

https://www.risestrong.org.uk/

Heidi Mavir, Advocate, Activist, CEO of EOTAS Matters

https://www.heidimavir.com/

Steph Cross, Project manager, VC Gallery

https://thevcgallery.com/

Julie Lockley, Administration Officer, Brightstar Boxing, Shifnal, Shropshire

https://www.brightstarboxing.co.uk/

Charlotte Budd, survivor and ambassador for EIDA

https://www.eida.org.uk/resources/self-employed-and-surviving-domestic-abuse-charlotte-budd

Anj Handa, Founder of Inspiring Women Changemakers.

https://www.inspiringwomenchangemakers.co.uk/

Amanda Jones, CEO at Shropshire Supports Refugees, Shropshire

https://www.shropshiresupportsrefugees.org/our-team

Lindsay McGlone - Lindsay recognises and acknowledges that all genders, especially those who are marginalised and underrepresented face discrimination. Lindsay advocates for the LGBTQ+ and trans communities.

https://lindsaymcglone.co.uk/

Mia Gilles, Community Connector, PAVS, Pembrokeshire

https://www.pavs.org.uk/

Emma Harris and Andrea Williams, Cranstoun

https://cranstoun.org/

Jenna Blair, Jenna Blair Yoga, Shropshire

https://www.jennablairyoga.co.uk/

Zoe Brinn

https://zoebrinn.co.uk/

Our last mention is for the incredible Danielle Hurst, who sadly tragically passed away last year. Dani has been part of PEGS since our early days and a friend even longer to our Founding Director. Danielle was a survivor, an advocate and someone who always placed the voices of those who needed support at the centre of everything she did. Her passion, tenacity and determination were something we all benefited from. Our world here at PEGS is smaller (and quieter!) without Dani, but it wouldn’t be right to not celebrate her work and who she was as a woman. Our hearts and thoughts remain with Dani’s family, especially her two children.

A message from Michelle, PEGS Founding Director:

“Thank you for being the woman you are, for using your voice to help those in need, for being part of the change women need. Thank you for inspiring me, for including me in your world, for helping me grow and to be a better leader and woman. I am privileged and thankful to know you, to work alongside you, to celebrate your wins, to watch you grow and soar PEGS and I will always be one of your biggest cheerleaders.”

International Women’s Day is a powerful opportunity to inspire our children to be advocates for equality, to celebrate the women in their lives, and to dream of a world where every person—regardless of gender—has the chance to thrive. By taking small but meaningful actions, we can contribute to a future where our children and all future generations grow up in a more equitable world.

This March 8th, let’s not just acknowledge the achievements of women—let’s celebrate them, support them, and ensure that their stories continue to inspire generations to come.

Happy International Women’s Day 2025!

Supporting Parents Through Child-to-Parent Abuse: Understanding PEGS and Its Services

Thu, 06 Mar 2025 08:30:33 GMT

Supporting Parents Through Child-to-Parent Abuse: Understanding PEGS and Its Services

Parenting is often described as one of life’s most rewarding yet challenging journeys. But for some, the journey becomes incredibly complex when faced with child-to-parent abuse (CPA). It is a topic rarely spoken about, yet it is a reality for many families across the UK and further afield. At PEGS, we understand the emotional toll this takes on parents, carers, and guardians. That is why our mission is to offer support, guidance, and advocacy to those affected.

PEGS was founded in 2019 and went operational in March 2020 after recognising a significant gap in services for parents experiencing abusive behaviours from their children. Based in Shropshire, but available nationally through online services, PEGS is committed to providing support that is accessible, compassionate, and tailored to the needs of each family.

Unlike traditional family support services, PEGS focuses solely on the parental figure. We understand that addressing CPA requires a whole-family approach, but we believe in empowering parents to navigate these challenging circumstances with confidence. Our services include practitioner-led group sessions, advocacy, workshops, and peer support, ensuring that no parent has to face this journey alone. All of our services are free to access and parental figures can access support for as long as they need via peer support, daily practitioner led sessions, workshops and programmes.

At PEGS, we offer a structured yet flexible support system designed to meet parents where they are in their journey. Our core services include:

Daily Practitioner-Led Sessions: Held online, these sessions provide a safe, confidential space where parents can share experiences, gain advice, and receive emotional support.
Workshops & Programmes: Designed to build resilience and empower parents, our workshops cover key topics that help parents regain confidence and develop effective coping strategies.
Advocacy & Wellbeing Support: Whether it's providing letters to confirm engagement with our services or attending meetings alongside parents, we advocate on behalf of those experiencing CPA.
Peer Support Community: Our closed and monitored Facebook group offers parents a place to connect with others who understand their experiences, fostering a sense of community and mutual support.
One-to-One Support (Limited Availability): For those in funded areas, individualised support with a dedicated practitioner is available, offering tailored strategies and guidance.

Parental figures can self-refer to PEGS or be referred by a professional. Once a referral is received, our team conducts a triage process that may take up to 10 working days. Parents then receive an initial email outlining the services available and how to access them. If eligible for one-to-one support, they will be placed on a waiting list and contacted when a practitioner is available. In the meantime, they can still access all other group-based services.

Experiencing CPA can evoke a wide range of emotions, from guilt and helplessness to isolation and frustration. Our 2022 survey revealed that:

85% of parents felt isolated or alone
74% felt blamed
95% felt helpless
76% felt scared

These feelings are completely natural, and at PEGS, we strive to provide a non-judgemental space where parents can be heard, supported, and empowered to move forward in a way that feels right for them.

If you are experiencing child-to-parent abuse, please know that support is available. PEGS is here to listen, guide, and empower you through your journey. While our service is not a crisis helpline, we can provide you with the tools and support needed to navigate these challenges.

You can download our free booklet below which explains more about us and our services

Sons who abuse and kill their mothers

Wed, 05 Mar 2025 16:55:53 GMT

This Trigger warning.

This post will link to an article about sons who abuse and ultimately kill their mothers. Please take care if you read this.

A recent report by the Femicide Census has revealed a harrowing statistic: over the past 15 years, more than 170 mothers in the UK have been killed by their sons, accounting for nearly 10% of all women killed by men during this period. We cannot ignore this any longer.

Change is not just necessary—it is overdue.

While domestic abuse is widely acknowledged, CPA continues to be shrouded in stigma and misunderstanding. Many parents suffer in silence, fearful of judgment, ashamed to seek help, or simply unaware that support exists.

The recent Femicide Census report highlighted that mental ill health played a role in 58% of matricides, with factors such as substance abuse, lack of affordable housing, and misogyny also contributing. These findings emphasise the complex interplay of issues that can lead to such tragic outcomes.

Despite these complexities, the systems in place to identify and respond to CPA are failing.

MARAC chairs and attendees acknowledge that existing frameworks do not adequately support parents experiencing abuse from their child. Yet instead of alternative solutions, there is often inaction. Abuse is dismissed because it is committed by a son or daughter, and the responsibility is placed back onto parents—most often mothers—to continue providing support, even when they fear for their lives.

These mothers and parents are all around us—our family members, friends, neighbours, colleagues. They are the people we see every day in our communities, in the shops, at the bus stop. They are also the ones we no longer see—those who have withdrawn, disappeared from social activities, or are too afraid to ask for help.

They could be you.

One of the greatest challenges in tackling CPA is breaking the cycle of silence and stigma. Parents facing abuse from their children often feel isolated, believing that no one will understand or that seeking help might result in judgment or even the removal of their child from the home. It is vital that we create a culture where parents can speak out without fear and access the resources they need without shame.

We must also recognise that CPA is not a niche issue—it is happening in homes across the country, often unnoticed. These parents should not have to suffer alone. It is our collective responsibility to acknowledge their experiences, ensure that they are seen, and provide them with the support they desperately need

We understand that this issue is complex, that it doesn’t fit neatly into existing structures, and that many professionals are doing their best in a broken system. But we cannot keep repeating the same ineffective responses. We acknowledge the problem, we say we need to do better, and yet we continue as we always have. This is not just unhelpful—it is unsafe. Without urgent change to policies, frameworks, and practice, lives will continue to be lost.

Most parents do not want to criminalise their child—no matter their age. We must start identifying child-to-parent abuse earlier, long before it escalates to crisis. It is rarely a problem that begins in adulthood, and that means we have opportunities to intervene sooner. The time for change is now.

For almost five years, PEGS has been raising awareness, developing training, and advocating for a better approach to CPA. But we cannot do this alone. We need all of you—professionals, policymakers, and communities—to stand with us. We know the system is failing you too. Let’s work together to create the change that is so desperately needed.

Today, our hearts are heavy. Please take time to reflect, to check in on those you love and care about. The entire PEGS team stands with the families affected by this tragic loss of life.

You can read the full article by clicking on the link below

Professional information booklet

Tue, 04 Mar 2025 10:02:19 GMT

Supporting Professionals: Free PEGS Information Booklet Available Now

At PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support), we understand the crucial role professionals play in supporting parents experiencing child-to-parent abuse (CPA). To help professionals navigate this complex issue, we’re excited to introduce our free downloadable Professional Information Booklet—a comprehensive resource designed to enhance understanding of PEGS, the referral pathway, and the support we provide.

This resource has been carefully developed based on the most asked questions we receive and to provide professionals with essential information, including:

Understanding PEGS – Who we are, what we do, and why our support is vital.
Referral Pathway & Criteria – A clear guide on how professionals can refer parents or carers to our services and the eligibility criteria.
What Support Looks Like – Insight into the practical and emotional support we offer, including advocacy, workshops, and one-to-one guidance.

Child-to-parent abuse is a growing concern, yet many professionals feel under-equipped to identify and support affected families. By downloading our booklet, you’ll gain valuable knowledge to make informed referrals, ensuring families receive the help they need.

You can access the booklet by clicking the link below, and don’t forget to have a look at the rest of our blog section, there are multiple other free recourses you can download

We’re committed to working alongside professionals to create safer, more supported environments for parents facing CPA.

If you have any questions or would like further training, please don’t hesitate to get in touch.

Together, we can make a difference.

Mon, 03 Mar 2025 12:06:40 GMT

Join the PEGS 50km Challenge: Step Forward to Support Families Facing Child-to-Parent Abuse

At PEGS, our mission is to support parents, carers, and guardians experiencing Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA). This often-overlooked issue affects numerous families, leading to feelings of isolation and helplessness. To continue providing essential services, we invite you to participate in our 50km Walk or Run Challenge during the month of March

Child-to-Parent Abuse occurs when a child exhibits abusive behaviours towards a parental figure. This abuse can be physical, verbal, economic, digital, coercive, or even sexual. It's estimated to occur in at least 3% of UK homes, though the actual figure may be higher. CPA is distinct from typical challenging behaviour, as it instils fear, forces lifestyle changes, and profoundly impacts families.

We encourage individuals and teams to commit to walking or running a total of 50km. You can choose to complete this distance in one go or spread it over multiple sessions, making it accessible to participants of all fitness levels. This challenge not only promotes physical well-being but also fosters community spirit and solidarity with families affected by CPA.

Your involvement directly supports our initiatives:

£15 Raised: Sponsors a parent to have an initial call with one of our team members.
£75 raised, this will sponsor 15 parents to attend our bespoke Bounce Back , Step Forward 2 part workshop
£115 raised, this will sponsor a parent to work on a 1-1 basis with a practitioner for 6 weeks
£215 raised, this will sponsor a cohort of 15 parents to access our EPIC programme - a bespoke 6-week programme
504 raised, this will pay for the team to deliver 7 x weekday daily practitioner led sessions in one month. We have over 100 parents attend these sessions every month currently

How to Get Involved

1. Sign Up: Visit our GoodHub page to register for the challenge. app.goodhub.com

2. Fundraise: Share your participation with friends, family, and colleagues to gather support and donations.

3. Complete the Challenge: Track your progress and share updates to inspire others.

If participating in the challenge isn't feasible, you can still make a significant impact:

Donate: Contribute directly through our GoodHub page.
Spread Awareness: Share information about CPA and our fundraising event on social media and within your networks.

By taking part in the 50km Walk or Run Challenge, you're not just covering distance—you're bridging the gap between isolation and support for many families. Together, we can make a difference and ensure that no parent feels alone in their journey.

For more information, to register, or to donate, please visit our GoodHub page here

Let's step forward together for a cause that truly matters.

Children services acronym guide

Wed, 26 Feb 2025 16:17:29 GMT

Empowering Parents: Our New Acronym Booklet for Navigating Social Care

As parents and carers, we all want the best for our children. However, when working alongside social care professionals, the use of unfamiliar acronyms can sometimes feel overwhelming. Understanding key terminology is crucial in ensuring that you, as a parental figure, feel confident and informed when advocating for your child.

To support you on this journey, we are excited to introduce our Acronym Booklet , designed specifically to empower parents, carers, and guardians. This easy-to-use resource provides clear explanations of the most commonly used acronyms within social care, education, and family support services. Whether you're attending a meeting, reading a report, or simply seeking clarity, our booklet will serve as a helpful guide.

We believe that knowledge is power, and by breaking down professional jargon into accessible language, we hope to foster stronger communication and collaboration between families and social care professionals. Every parental figure deserves to feel confident and informed when making decisions about their child's wellbeing.

Our Acronym Booklet is now available, to download below and we encourage all parents, carers, and guardians to make use of this valuable tool. Together, we can ensure that every family has the support and understanding they need.

February Service Shout Out

Tue, 25 Feb 2025 14:44:55 GMT

This is a subtitle for your new post

Calan DVS is a leading domestic abuse charity in Wales, dedicated to providing safety and inspiring positive change for individuals and families affected by domestic violence and abuse. Established in 2012 through the merger of Neath and Lliw Valley Women’s Aid, Calan DVS has since expanded by incorporating organisations such as Brecknock Women’s Aid, Bridgend Women’s Aid, and Ammanford Women’s Aid.

Calan DVS offers a range of trauma-informed services designed to meet the needs of those experiencing domestic abuse:

Accommodation Services – Safe refuge spaces across South and Mid-Wales offer immediate shelter for individuals fleeing abusive situations.
Community Support – Specialist Domestic Violence Support Workers provide confidential consultations, risk assessments, and personalised safety planning. Support also includes housing advice, financial guidance, relationship counselling, parenting support, and referrals to specialist agencies.
Group Programmes – Tailored programmes for women, men, children, and young people focus on recovery, resilience, and education around healthy relationships. Key initiatives include the Freedom Programme, Recovery Toolkit, and Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) Recovery Toolkit for Children and Young People.
The Lighthouse Project – Funded by the National Lottery, this initiative includes two specialist programmes supporting male victims and families who choose to stay together despite domestic abuse. It promotes safer environments and stronger relationships through a trauma-informed approach.

Beyond direct support, Calan DVS is committed to raising awareness and educating the community on domestic abuse:

Training Services – The organisation offers training for professionals, community groups, and individuals to help them recognise and respond to domestic abuse effectively.
Collaborative Efforts – By working with various agencies, Calan DVS ensures a coordinated response to domestic violence, providing comprehensive support for victims.

Contact Information

If you or someone you know needs support, or if you would like to help Calan DVS in its mission, you can get in touch through the following channels:

Phone Numbers :
Ammanford: 01269 597474
Brecon: 01874 625146
Neath Port Talbot: 01639 633580
Radnor: 01597 824655
Bridgend (Assia Suite): 01656 815919
Email : enquiries@calandvs.org.uk

PEGS launches E-learning

Fri, 21 Feb 2025 07:57:27 GMT

PEGS launches E-learning for professionals

You asked for it, we listened and created it....

We are excited to announce the launch of our latest e-learning resources, designed to support professionals working with families facing child-to-parent abuse (CPA). These carefully developed modules provide crucial insight into this complex issue.

Rapid Learn: Child-to-Parent Abuse (takes up to 45 minutes)
This short yet impactful module provides a concise overview of child-to-parent abuse. It is designed for busy professionals who require a rapid but effective learning experience. The module covers key definitions, prevalence, what CPA can present like and help practitioners to identify and address CPA cases with confidence.
Outcomes:

A basic understanding of Child-to-Parent Abuse
An awareness of the impact on parents and caregivers experiencing this form of abuse
Suitable for any individual wanting to develop their knowledge and awareness of CPA

Introduction to Child-to-Parent Abuse (1–2 hours)
A more in-depth learning experience, this module delves deeper into the nature, causes, and complexities of CPA. This module is particularly beneficial for those who work closely with families and need a robust understanding of CPA in order to provide informed and effective support.
Outcomes:

Increased knowledge and awareness of Child-to-Parent Abuse
Increased understanding of the impact on parents and caregivers experiencing this form of abuse
An awareness of what to do when someone discloses Child-to-Parent Abuse

Our e-learning resources are highly relevant for professionals across various sectors, including:

Early Help teams
Social Care professionals
Health providers
Education professionals
Police forces
Youth workers
Any other professionals supporting families and young people

To purchase the courses, please visit https://courses.pegstraining.co.uk/s/store .

Let’s work together to better understand and address child-to-parent abuse. Together, we can make a difference .

February Spotlight: Harmful Sexual Behaviour

Thu, 20 Feb 2025 11:11:44 GMT

Harmful Sexual Behaviour Towards Parental Figures: Breaking the Silence

Trigger Warning: This article discusses harmful sexualised behaviors, sexual assault, and sexual abuse. Please take care while reading. If you need support, you can reach out to the services listed below.

- Survivors’ Network provides a list of local and national services. Link: https://survivorsnetwork.org.uk/resource/helplines-webchat-services/

- Rape Crisis offers a 24/7 Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Line, available every day of the year. Call free on 0808 500 2222 or visit https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-help/want-to-talk/ .

- SARSAS has a helpline and online chat available at various times, with e-support open 24/7. They aim to respond within one working day . Link: https://www.sarsas.org.uk/

- Samaritans has a helpline available 24/7, every day of the year. Call free on 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Sexual abuse within families is often discussed in terms of adults harming children. However, a deeply distressing yet largely unrecognised issue is child-to-parent harmful sexual behaviour. While this topic is difficult to talk about, it is critical that we break the silence to ensure parents receive the support they need without fear of judgment, blame, or disbelief.

Recent research by us at PEGS has shown that 17% of parents experience inappropriate sexualised behaviours from their child, and 5% have been subjected to sexual assault and/or rape by their child (including both minor and adult aged children). Despite ongoing efforts to raise awareness, this issue remains heavily stigmatised and underreported.

Understanding Child-to-Parent Harmful Sexual Behaviour

The dynamics of child-to-parent sexual abuse are uniquely challenging. Parental figures, who are traditionally in positions of authority and care, often struggle with feelings of guilt, confusion, and shame when faced with these behaviours. They may hesitate to report or seek help for various reasons, including concerns about criminalising their own child.

Their fear of judgment and shame, alongside limited support services, leaves many parents feeling increasingly isolated and alone in their experience, making it harder for parents to find the support they need.

While every situation is unique, harmful sexual behaviours towards a parental figure could include:

- Engaging in explicit conversations or making sexualised comments

- Groping, touching, or attempting inappropriate physical contact

- Exposure or masturbation in front of a parent with the intent to provoke discomfort

- Creating or attempting to create explicit images or recordings of a parent

- Pressuring or coercing a parent into situations of a sexual nature

Please note, the above list is not exhaustive.

To use the words of one brave parent who experienced harmful sexual behaviour: "Telling someone your child hits you is one thing, telling someone your child has sexualised thoughts about you is another"

The Importance of Compassionate Intervention

To address this issue, it is vital to raise awareness. More open discussions are needed to ensure that this form of abuse is recognised and addressed. By breaking the silence, we can:

- Provide parents with access to specialist support

- Promote earlier intervention to reduce the likelihood of behaviours escalating

- Offer education and guidance to help families navigate these challenges

To effectively address child-to-parent sexual abuse, a compassionate and structured approach is required. This includes access to specialist intervention and support. Trained professionals in child sexual behaviour management can provide tailored strategies and therapeutic support to help families manage inappropriate behaviours and navigate the challenges they face.

It’s essential that we acknowledge the issue of child-to-parent sexual abuse and work to break the silence surrounding it. Families facing this challenge should not have to navigate it alone. By raising awareness, improving access to services, and fostering a non-judgmental approach, we can ensure that affected families receive the support, education, and solutions they need to move forward.

If you or someone you know is experiencing inappropriate sexualised behaviours from their child, remember: support is available. You are not alone, and seeking help is the first step toward healing.

For further support, consider reaching out to one of the following services:

- Survivors’ Network provides a list of local and national services. Link: https://survivorsnetwork.org.uk/resource/helplines-webchat-services/

- Rape Crisis offers a 24/7 Rape & Sexual Abuse Support Line, available every day of the year. Call free on 0808 500 2222 or visit https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-help/want-to-talk/ .

- SARSAS has a helpline and online chat available at various times, with e-support open 24/7. They aim to respond within one working day . Link: https://www.sarsas.org.uk/

- Samaritans has a helpline available 24/7, every day of the year. Call free on 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org/

Domestic abuse in later life

Wed, 19 Feb 2025 12:14:32 GMT

Domestic Abuse in Later Life E-learning

At PEGS , we are always eager to champion the work of others who are making a real difference. That’s why we’re excited to share Carrie Bower’s insightful course: The Impact of Domestic Abuse in Later Life: An Introduction .

Carrie has kindly pledged that for every course purchased through our unique link, £10 will be donated to PEGS , helping us continue our vital work supporting families.

The course has been refined based on positive and constructive feedback, with added audio to improve accessibility. It’s an invaluable resource for anyone wanting to deepen their understanding of domestic abuse in later life.

�� Exclusive early access & discount link: Click here

�� Download & share this short animation on social media: Watch here

By supporting this course, you’re not only gaining essential knowledge but also helping us continue advocating for those affected. Let’s raise awareness together!

A h uge thank you to Carrie for her continued support of PEGS

The Power of Child to Parent Abuse Awareness

Tue, 11 Feb 2025 09:00:00 GMT

The Impact of Addressing Child to Parent Abuse in Events and Conferences

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) is an often-overlooked form of domestic abuse that carries significant consequences for families, professionals, and society as a whole. When CPA is included in conferences and events focused on safeguarding, domestic abuse, and family dynamics, it shines a spotlight on this complex issue and fosters greater understanding and action. At PEGS, we’ve seen first-hand the transformative impact that these discussions can have through the talks we deliver at events worldwide.

Including CPA in event agendas helps bring attention to an issue that many professionals are unsure how to address. Parents experiencing abuse often feel isolated, unheard and unsupported. This can mean that professionals can feel they lack the tools to identify, manage, and support these situations effectively.

By dedicating time to CPA, events can:

Raise awareness of the prevalence and challenges of CPA.
Empower professionals with actionable strategies for intervention.
Shift perceptions by emphasising that CPA is a form of domestic abuse requiring serious attention.
Build connections between professionals to enhance collaboration in tackling CPA.

At PEGS, we’ve been privileged to share our expertise at a variety of events and conferences, and the response has been overwhelmingly positive. Michelle John, our founder and director, brings a powerful combination of professional insight and personal experience to every talk, sparking conversations and driving meaningful change.

Empathy and understanding: Attendees frequently share how hearing the lived experiences of families affected by CPA deepens their empathy and motivates them to take action.
Actionable insights: Many professionals have reported that PEGS’ strategies and tools have helped them make immediate improvements in how they handle CPA cases.
Global interest: Events like the International Child to Parent Abuse Conference demonstrated that this is not a localized issue—professionals from around the world are eager to learn and collaborate on solutions.

Our talks have made an impact at a range of events hosted by multi agency professionals and organisations. We have also have had the opportunity to be interviewed on various podcasts and by the media, including:

The International Child to Parent Abuse Conference (October 2024), a virtual event that united global professionals to share best practices.
Safeguarding and domestic abuse conferences, where CPA discussions have encouraged more integrated approaches to family support.
Forensic and criminology panels, where we’ve explored CPA’s links to broader patterns of abuse and criminality.

You can listen to or watch some of Michelle's interviews below:

#AbuseTalk Podcast: Michelle discussed the complexities of CPA and shared insights from her work with PEGS. Link: https://youtu.be/FANH9D71Pgo?feature=shared
InTune Radio Shropshire: Michelle was interviewed about the challenges parents face when dealing with CPA and the support PEGS offers. Link: https://fb.watch/xpNamGpE7y/
" What do Parents Know?" Podcast: Michelle explored the dynamics of CPA, the lack of media coverage on the topic, and strategies for parents seeking help. Link: https://www.buzzsprout.com/1591687/episodes/13193641
Channel 5 news: CPA Report. Link: https://youtu.be/thzFpg5eIus?feature=shared
ITV news: CPA Report. Link: https://www.itv.com/news/2022-03-09/its-like-being-held-hostage-parents-facing-abuse-from-own-children

Every time CPA is included in an event, the ripple effects are tangible—parents and caregivers feel seen, professionals feel equipped, and policies begin to shift. By opening the conversation, you can be part of that change.

If you’re organising an event or conference and would like to include Child to Parent Abuse on the agenda, PEGS is here to help.

Contact us at admin@pegsupport.com to discuss how Michelle John and our team can contribute to your event. Together, we can ensure CPA becomes an essential part of the conversation around domestic abuse and safeguarding.

Podcast: Let's Get Visible with Carrie Bower

Fri, 07 Feb 2025 13:39:24 GMT

Michelle John talks CPA with Carrie Bower on 'Let's Get Visible' Podcast

PEGS' Founder Michelle was delighted to join Carrie Bower on her podcast recently to discuss the incredibly important and often hidden issue of child-to-parent abuse (CPA). As many of you know, raising awareness of CPA is at the heart of everything we do at PEGS, so it was a privilege to have the opportunity to share our insights with Carrie and her audience.

Child-to-parent abuse is an issue that continues to be widely misunderstood, yet it affects more families than people might realise. During the discussion, Michelle and Carrie explored the different ways CPA can present itself, including physical, verbal, financial, and emotional abuse, as well as coercive control. They also spoke about the immense stigma and isolation that parents experiencing CPA often feel, and why it’s so crucial that they know they are not alone.

One of the key points highlighted was that CPA can impact anyone, regardless of background, and there is no ‘typical’ family affected. Both organisations know how difficult it can be to acknowledge that abuse is happening, particularly when it’s coming from your own child – but it’s so important to seek support.

Carrie, who works tirelessly to raise awareness of domestic abuse in later life through her platform, Visible Later Lives, was incredibly open to discussing CPA and how it can intersect with wider domestic abuse issues. It was fantastic to speak with someone who shares our passion for ensuring that no one feels invisible or unheard when facing abuse.

If you missed the podcast, we highly recommend giving it a listen on the link below. The more we talk about CPA, the more we can break down the stigma and make sure parents and carers know there is support available.

Listen to the podcast here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4pB6Q3uD021NAPJohF4CHs?si=-NNFqyZhQDm-QQ4Oh0F3Rw

A huge thank you to Carrie for having Michelle on her podcast – together, we can keep pushing for change.

easyfundraising for PEGS

Wed, 05 Feb 2025 11:52:41 GMT

Unlock the Power of Effortless Fundraising: Support PEGS Without Spending a Penny

At PEGS, we’re proud to be a lifeline for parents and carers, offering essential resources, guidance, advocacy, and support—all completely free of charge. However, making our services accessible at no cost requires funding, and we rely on donations and grants to make it happen.

We are committed to breaking down barriers to access, especially since nearly 25% of parents we supported in 2022 reported experiencing financial abuse by their child. It’s critical for us to ensure help remains available to all who need it, regardless of their financial circumstances.

To make supporting PEGS even easier, we’ve partnered with Easy Fundraising, a platform that transforms your everyday online shopping into free donations for our cause. By simply shopping through Easy Fundraising and selecting PEGS as your chosen charitable organisation, you can help us raise vital funds—without spending an extra penny.

Easy Fundraising connects you to over 7,000 online retailers, including household names like Amazon, eBay, Argos, and Tesco. Whenever you shop through the platform, a percentage of what you spend is donated directly to PEGS. It’s effortless, impactful, and free.

Supporting PEGS through Easy Fundraising is quick and simple:

Sign Up : Go to EasyFundraising.org.uk and create your account.
Select PEGS : Choose Parental Education Growth Support (PEGS) as your cause.
Shop : Use the platform to shop with your favorite retailers.
Raise Funds : A percentage of your purchase is automatically donated to PEGS—at no extra cost to you.

Every small contribution through Easy Fundraising adds up, helping us to:

Reach more families in need.
Create new resources and workshops.
Advocate for systemic changes to support parents and carers better.

By joining Easy Fundraising and choosing PEGS as your cause, you’re empowering families and providing them with the resources they need to rebuild and thrive—all through something as simple as online shopping.

Start your journey with Easy Fundraising and make a difference. Visit EasyFundraising.org.uk , select PEGS as your cause, and shop to support families in need—one purchase at a time.

Together, we can continue to provide hope, support, and empowerment to those who need it most.

Over 90% of PEGS community favour term 'Child to Parent Abuse'

Thu, 30 Jan 2025 09:19:29 GMT

The Importance of an Agreed Definition for Child-to-Parent Abuse

Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) is a form of domestic abuse that affects around 3% of UK families, yet a lack of consistent definition and language creates barriers for those seeking support. At PEGS, we believe that having an agreed definition is essential to ensure shared

language across sectors and professionals, breaking down barriers for those identifying with CPA and reducing confusion.

A clear and unified definition will improve understanding, facilitate better access to support, and ensure that parents and carers are not left without recognition. With the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 statutory guidance already using the term 'child-to-parent abuse', it seems

logical and necessary to continue with the same language across all sectors.

The Home Office conducted a public consultation on defining CPA, which ended in February last year, for various reasons, no official definition has yet been decided. This ongoing lack of clarity continues to create difficulties for families and professionals alike.

It is vital to centre the voices of those directly impacted by CPA when determining the most appropriate terminology. Within PEGS’ closed peer support group, we asked over 2,000 parental figures how they identify with the language used to describe their experiences.

Over 90% stated that CPA was their preferred term, with 4% suggesting CAPVA (Child and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse) and 1% choosing Aggressive and Harmful Behaviours.

This overwhelming preference for CPA highlights the need for a consistent and widely recognised term that aligns with the lived experiences of those affected. Using different language across sectors risks creating unnecessary confusion and barriers to support.

Parents commented;

‘I vote to keep it simple as possible; a long name just means people will get confused.’

‘CPA makes sense to me, CAPVA is a mouthful, harmful behaviours will leave people scratching their heads, what constitutes harmful behaviours?'

‘Aggression towards a parent minimises what is happening to some parents, e.g physical assault is more than aggression‘

‘It is abuse, for me using anything other than this is unhelpful to me as the parent, to my child and to anyone else.’

‘If it was my partner, we would call it abuse, why would we call it anything different because it is my child.’

‘My experience is abusive, I am fearful of my child, I am being abused, anything less than abuse is not showing the true reality of what so many of us are having to deal with daily.’

‘It is my child, I am the parent, I am being abused – this is literally what child to parent abuse is. Why would someone call it anything different?’

So why does a consistent definition matter?

1. Ensures Shared Language – Professionals, policymakers, and support services using the same terminology will improve communication and create a more cohesive response to CPA.

2. Breaks Down Barriers – Parents and carers may struggle to identify with certain terminology, which can prevent them from seeking help. A clear and recognised term helps remove these obstacles.

3. Reduces Confusion – Mixed terminology leads to misunderstandings between agencies, professionals, and families, delaying crucial interventions and support.

4. Aligns with Existing Frameworks – With the Domestic Abuse Act recognising CPA, maintaining this language ensures consistency and reinforces its legitimacy across sectors.

The need for a clear definition of CPA is further highlighted by national initiatives recognising the issue. We have a Domestic Abuse Commissioner dedicated to addressing all forms of domestic abuse, including CPA. Additionally, CPA now has an annual awareness day

(14th October) to drive public and professional awareness and recognition of the issue. The Child-to-Parent Abuse Covenant, backed by the Department for Work and Pensions, also aims to provide greater support for affected parental figures.

Moreover, it is essential to recognise that we no longer use the term 'domestic violence'—instead, we refer to 'domestic abuse' to better reflect the broad range of behaviours that constitute abuse. Ensuring CPA is firmly embedded within this framework is crucial to providing families with the recognition and support they need.

For families experiencing CPA, recognition and appropriate support are vital. Establishing a universally accepted definition ensures that no one is left struggling due to a lack of understanding or inconsistent language.

At PEGS, we remain committed to amplifying the voices of those affected, advocating for a unified approach, and ensuring that CPA is recognised, understood, and responded to effectively. If you are a parent or carer experiencing CPA or a professional looking for

guidance, please reach out to us. Together, we can ensure no family faces this issue alone.

Organisations Across the Globe: VisAble

Thu, 30 Jan 2025 09:15:28 GMT

VisAble

For this blog, we head oversees to New Zealand to shine a light on an incredible organisation, VisAble . To learn more, read the below guest blog below and see the end of this post for a downloadable report:

Kia Ora

Lee Tempest is Child to Parent Violence and Abuse lead with VisAble in Aotearoa New Zealand. The lack of awareness, knowledge and support for CPA here means that parents are often blamed and the violence in their homes minimized. Sadly, whatever country we live in this seems to be the common thread that unites us internationally as we all fiercely advocate for change. VisAble believes that this form of family violence needs to urgently be addressed through policy, research and support.

We are a disabled person-led organisation who work to strengthen national capabilities across agencies and sectors to prevent and respond to violence, abuse, and neglect affecting disabled people and their whānau. Our focus includes tāngata whaikaha Māori and their whānau, tagata sa’ilimalo and āiga-tele, d/Deaf, neurodivergent, and Adults at Risk. Any parent experiencing child to parent violence and abuse can be an Adult at Risk.

VisAble equips organisations and individuals to make their services inclusive and accessible for disabled people impacted by violence. This includes and family/whānau living with child to parent violence. We provide:

Safeguarding Adults Response: Guidance and coordination for multi-agency responses to protect Adults at Risk.
Prevention and Response Support: Tailored advice, programmes, and services to identify and respond to violence, abuse, and neglect.
Cultural and Inclusive Safety: Strategies to ensure culturally safe, family/whānau-centred responses.

2024 was a busy year for VisAble. We published a comprehensive report Child to parent violence and abuse: New Zealand’s invisible family violence which has been shared on many platforms nationally and internationally. Booklets to support parents/caregivers and professionals were also published. A monthly peer support group was established and as our numbers grow we hope to set up further groups for parents/caregivers. We started to build a roundtable community group with professionals and of course the experts - those with lived experience where we work collaboratively together to drive for the much need change to recognise and respond supportively to families/whānau experiencing CPA.

In 2025 we will continue to develop our resources and are excited to be sending out our first CPA survey to parents/caregivers. This will begin to generate prevalence data which can then be used to advocate for changes in policy, practice and funding.

At a Government level -Te Puna Aonui is responsible for implementing Aotearoa New Zealand’s national strategy to eliminate family and sexual violence. One of their chief principal advisors recently visited the UK and Australia to explore how these countries were responding to CPA. PEGs was part of this exploration. We hope that the information from this fact finding mission signals a shift in 2025 in recognising and responding to CPA in our country.

Fostering international collaboration is important, especially when we are building the capability of services up from the ground level. Linking in with others around the globe who ‘get it’ is a huge support. Shout out to PEGS and founder Michelle John who have been inspirational in guiding us, sharing hard-won knowledge and resources and connecting for an online chat. We look forward to strengthening our connection with PEGS and sharing our own resources as we grow, learn and develop.

Ngā mihi nui

https://www.visable.co.nz/

Image on left below: Lee Tempest

Image on right below: A Pohutukawa tree fondly known as Aotearoa New Zealand’s Christmas tree as it flowers in December.

Service Shout Out: stem4

Wed, 29 Jan 2025 09:39:49 GMT

Service Shout Out: stem4

Supporting Youth Mental Health: Exploring stem4's Mission and Resources

Stem4 is a UK-based digital mental health charity dedicated to improving the emotional wellbeing of children and young people. Through a range of innovative, evidence-based tools and initiatives, stem4 aims to provide accessible mental health resources and foster understanding across schools, families, and communities.

Empowering Young People Through Digital Tools

At the core of stem4’s efforts are its five free mental health apps, tailored to address key

areas of mental well-being:

Calm Harm: Supports managing and resisting urges to self-harm.
Clear Fear: Helps young people understand and manage symptoms of anxiety.
Move Mood: Assists with low mood or depression, encouraging positive behavioral changes.
Combined Minds: Designed to empower family and friends to offer effective support.
Worth Warrior: Focuses on improving low self-worth, body image, and eating difficulties.

These apps are backed by clinical expertise and have helped thousands of young people build healthier coping mechanisms.

A Holistic Approach to Mental Health

Beyond digital solutions, stem4 champions mental health education through:

School resources: Offering a whole-school approach to addressing mental health.
Conferences and workshops: Engaging parents, carers, students, and professionals with practical advice and insights.
Youth Mental Health Day: Celebrated annually to spark conversations around young people's mental health and inspire year-round awareness.

Parent Mental Health Day

Recognising the critical role of parents in fostering a supportive environment, stem4 introduced Parent Mental Health Day to spotlight the mental health challenges faced by caregivers. This annual event provides resources, discussions, and tools to help parents manage their own well-being while supporting their children. It highlights the importance of parents' mental health in maintaining a stable and nurturing family dynamic, ensuring both caregivers and children thrive emotionally.

Learn More

Stem4 continues to make a profound impact on youth mental health through innovation, education, and community engagement. To explore their mission further or discover how you can get involved, visit stem4 at https://stem4.org.uk/

PEGS Child to Parent Abuse Employer Covenant

Tue, 28 Jan 2025 10:36:28 GMT

Championing Change: The Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC)

Child-to-Parent Abuse (CPA) is a form of domestic abuse that remains largely hidden, despite its devastating impact on families. CPA occurs when a child – regardless of age – directs abusive, coercive, or controlling behaviours towards someone with parental responsibility. Stigma, lack of awareness, and the emotional complexity of CPA mean many families suffer in silence.

Recognising this urgent need, PEGS created the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) to drive change and encourage organisations to take an active role in addressing CPA. The Covenant isn’t just about policy – it’s about partnership, empowerment, and creating safe,

supportive environments for employees and service users affected by CPA. Launched in 2021, with backing from the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP), the CPAC is a ground-breaking initiative, helping employers across the UK acknowledge CPA as a form of domestic abuse and equips them to support affected staff and volunteers. The idea for CPAC was sparked when 70% of parents supported by PEGS reported that CPA had negatively impacted their work. Many parents had to leave jobs, reduce working hours, or struggled with concentration and emotional wellbeing due to the abuse they were experiencing. Since the launch, reports of CPA’s impact on employment have risen by 4%, making CPAC more vital than ever. Through CPAC, organisations commit to recognising CPA as part of their domestic abuse policies, raising awareness, and equipping their teams to respond empathetically.

Employers signing the Covenant pledge to:

Raise Awareness: Embed CPA into existing discussions, policies, and practices around domestic abuse.
Educate Staff: Upskill employees and volunteers with knowledge and resources about CPA.
Create Safe Spaces: Foster an environment where individuals feel empowered to disclose CPA without fear of stigma or judgment.

To support these efforts, PEGS provides a free CPAC Introductory Training session, helping organisations understand CPA’s nuances and equipping them with tools to respond effectively. CPA affects an estimated 3–10% of families, yet its impact extends beyond the home.

Parents affected by CPA often feel isolated and unsupported, particularly in the workplace. CPAC gives employers the opportunity to be part of the solution by recognising this hidden issue and taking steps to address it.

Michelle John, Director of PEGS, describes CPAC as more than a policy framework – it’s a community commitment:

“When I started PEGS, I didn’t know exactly what it would become, but I knew change had to happen. The Covenant is about creating that change, not just for families, but across society.”

In November 2023, PEGS hosted a CPAC celebration at the Halifax flagship office in London. The event brought together employers, policymakers, and domestic abuse specialists to reflect on CPAC’s impact and inspire further action.

Key highlights included:

Panel Discussions: Representatives from organisations like Cadent Gas and Axis Counselling shared how signing CPAC transformed their approach to supporting employees.
Global Connections: Tabitha from Parent Real Talk in Michigan highlighted the potential to adapt CPAC in the United States, emphasising its universal relevance.
Keynote Speakers: Experts from the DWP, Age UK, Axis , Dyfed Powys Police Crime Commissioner, Safenet and Family Lives showcased the importance of collaboration in addressing CPA.

Feedback from attendees celebrated the event’s impact, with delegates describing it as “insightful,” “inspiring,” and a call to action for organisations nationwide. Becoming a CPAC signatory isn’t just about compliance – it’s about leading the way in creating safer, more supportive workplaces.

As the first initiative of its kind, CPAC gives organisations the tools to:

Proactively address CPA.
Build trust with employees by showing a commitment to wellbeing.
Raise awareness of CPA and its wider societal impact.

By signing CPAC, organisations join a growing community of changemakers dedicated to tackling CPA and supporting families through challenging times. Since its inception, PEGS has supported over 8500 parents and trained over 2,000 professionals to recognise and respond to CPA. The organisation’s efforts – from advocacy and peer support to training and policy development – are driven by lived experience and a deep commitment to empowering families.

What’s Next?

PEGS invites employers across the UK to join the movement by signing the Covenant and becoming part of this vital conversation. Together, we can break the silence surrounding CPA and ensure no family or employee feels unsupported.

To learn more about CPAC or to sign the Covenant, visit www.pegsupport.co.uk/CPAC

Resource for Parental Figures: What is CPA?

Wed, 22 Jan 2025 13:37:23 GMT

What is Child to Parent Abuse? A resource booklet for parents, carers and guardians

Navigating the challenges of Child to Parent Abuse can be incredibly overwhelming for any parent, carer or guardian. To support those who are experiencing CPA, we've created a downloadable resource booklet filled with helpful information, practical advice, and ideas to support your situation.

To access the booklet, click below:

PEGS Movement to Music

Tue, 14 Jan 2025 16:09:56 GMT

The benefits of Movement to Music

At PEGS, the wellbeing of those we support is at the heart of everything that we do. One of our programmes, designed with the help of PEGS parental figures, is the Movement to Music sessions, half an hour of gentle, yet energising dance/movement, led by a lovely member of our team. These sessions are not just about getting active; they’re a holistic approach to boosting mental health and overall wellbeing. Here, we explore why music and dance are so beneficial and how these sessions can make a difference.

The Power of Music and Dance

Music and dance have been integral to human culture for centuries, offering emotional expression,

storytelling and social connection, but did you know that they also come with significant physical

and mental health benefits? Here's how:

Enhances Mental Health : Listening to music and moving to its rhythm triggers the release of endorphins; the 'feel-good' hormones. This can alleviate stress, anxiety and feelings of depression, while fostering a sense of joy and accomplishment.
Boosts Physical Fitness : Any form of dance is a full-body workout that improves cardiovascular health, enhances coordination and builds muscle strength. All of this is achieved in a fun and engaging way, making exercise feel less like a chore and more like a celebration.
Improves Cognitive Function : Learning new dance moves challenges your brain, enhancing memory, focus and problem-solving skills. This mental stimulation can be particularly beneficial for long-term brain health.
Fosters Social Connection : Dancing in a group setting creates a sense of community and belonging, even online! It’s an opportunity to connect with others, share experiences, and build supportive relationships—key elements in combating feelings of isolation and loneliness.
Encourages Self-Expression : Dance allows you to express emotions that might be hard to put into words. This release can be incredibly cathartic and empowering.

What to Expect at a PEGS Movement to Music Session

Each session is designed to be inclusive, fun and uplifting. With PEGS' guidance, participants can expect:

A welcoming and judgment-free environment where everyone, regardless of fitness level, can participate.
Easy for all abilities and fun routines set to a diverse playlist of invigorating music.
Opportunities to laugh, move and connect with others from the PEGS Community.
Techniques that not only improve physical fitness but also promote mental clarity and emotional balance.

Why It Matters

Mental health challenges affect countless individuals, and finding accessible, enjoyable ways to cope is essential. PEGS’ Movement to Music sessions aim to break down barriers, making exercise and self-care approachable and fun. The combination of physical activity, music, and social interaction creates a powerful tool for improving mental health and wellbeing.

How to Join

Joining a Movement to Music session is simple. Keep an eye out on our Peer Support Group page to find out more about upcoming sessions and how to register. Whether you’re looking to destress, meet new people, or simply try something new, these sessions are a perfect place to start.

So, put on your dancing shoes and join us for half an hour of movement, music and joy. Let’s dance our way to better health—mind, body, and soul!

January Spotlight: Digital Abuse

Tue, 14 Jan 2025 11:23:04 GMT

Understanding Digital Abuse in the Context of Child to Parent Abuse

In the age of technology, digital tools have become a central part of our daily lives. However, for some families, these tools are misused as instruments of control and harm. Digital abuse, a form of technology-facilitated abuse, is increasingly being seen in cases of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA), where children or teenagers use technology to intimidate, manipulate, or exert power over their parents or caregivers. While often overlooked, this emerging issue has significant implications for families and requires urgent attention.

In 2022, almost 30% of parental figures who had completed one of PEGS yearly surveys had shared how they were being abused via the use of technology. Behaviours can often include:

Constant Monitoring: Demanding access to a parent’s phone, emails, or social media accounts, or tracking their location via GPS.
Threats via Technology: Sending abusive messages or threatening to share sensitive or embarrassing information online.
Hacking and Control: Gaining unauthorized access to a parent’s accounts, devices, or financial information to manipulate or restrict their actions.
Cyberbullying: Using digital platforms to humiliate, intimidate, or demean parents publicly or privately.
Doxing – Using various ways to search for and publish private or identifying information about a parental figure on the internet.

CPA is already a challenging issue to address, and the addition of digital abuse creates further complexity. Technology provides children with tools to maintain control over their parents even when physical proximity is limited. For many parents, the abuse is compounded by

feelings of shame, isolation, and confusion about how to handle behaviour that defies traditional parent-child roles. The impact of digital abuse on parents can be profound. Constant monitoring or harassment via technology leaves parents feeling trapped and powerless in their own homes. The loss of privacy, coupled with the emotional strain of managing an abusive relationship with their child, can lead to

anxiety, depression, and social withdrawal. For many, the experience is compounded by a lack of understanding or support from others who may dismiss or misunderstand CPA.

Parents and caregivers experiencing digital abuse often face unique challenges in recognising and addressing the

behaviour. Some warning signs include:

A child demanding access to devices or accounts and becoming aggressive if denied.
Excessive messaging or calls, particularly with controlling or abusive language.
Threats to post private information or publicly humiliate the parent online.
Unauthorized purchases or changes to financial or personal accounts made by the child.

Steps to Address Digital Abuse in CPA

If you’re a parent facing digital abuse from your child, there are steps you can take to protect yourself and begin addressing the situation:

Secure Your Digital Presence: Update all passwords, enable two-factor authentication, and consider using apps to monitor and manage access to devices and accounts.
Document the Abuse: Keep a record of abusive messages or activity as evidence, which may be necessary for legal or therapeutic interventions.
Seek Professional Support: Organizations specializing in CPA, like PEGS, can provide guidance, workshops, and one-to-one support to help you navigate these challenges.
Set Boundaries: With professional help, work toward establishing and enforcing digital boundaries within your household.
Understand Legal Protections: Familiarize yourself with local laws regarding cyber harassment and unauthorized access to ensure you know your rights.

Digital abuse in the context of Child to Parent Abuse is a growing issue that needs greater societal awareness and systemic support. By addressing it head-on, we can empower parents and caregivers to take back control and work toward healthier relationships with their children. Organisations like PEGS are leading the way in providing free, accessible support to parental figures facing CPA. Through advocacy, education, and direct intervention, we help families navigate these challenging dynamics while fostering long-term change. Technology should be a tool for connection and empowerment, not a weapon of control. By shining a light on this hidden form of abuse, we can take meaningful steps toward safer and healthier home environments.

PEGS' Growth in 2024

Tue, 07 Jan 2025 13:38:33 GMT

PEGS Experiences Unprecedented Growth: 70% Increase in Referrals in 2024

2024 has been an extraordinary year for PEGS, as we witnessed a remarkable 70% increase in referrals. This growth underscores both the escalating awareness of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) and the crucial role PEGS plays in addressing this hidden issue. With an unwavering commitment to supporting families, the team have provided invaluable assistance to 3,520 parental figures in 2024 through a comprehensive range of services. CPA remains one of the least recognised forms of domestic abuse, yet its impact on families can be profound and far-reaching. CPA often leaves parents feeling isolated, ashamed, and unsure where to turn for help. The significant increase in referrals to PEGS highlights a growing recognition of the problem, as well as a collective effort to break the stigma surrounding it.

PEGS has continued to work tirelessly to address CPA, offering targeted resources and interventions to help parents navigate the complex emotions and challenges associated with abuse from their children. Through their advocacy work, PEGS has also been instrumental in pushing for policy changes and greater societal awareness of CPA, ensuring it is no longer an overlooked issue.

Behind the statistics and numbers are countless stories of resilience, empowerment, and transformation. The parental figures supported by PEGS in the past year have benefited from a holistic approach designed to meet the unique needs of each parental figure. This multi-pronged strategy includes:

One-to-One Support: Tailored and bespoke individual sessions with both practical and empathetic guidance for parents experiencing CPA.
Advocacy: Acting as a voice for parents, PEGS has supported individuals in navigating complex systems, including schools, social services, and the justice system.
Daily Practitioner Sessions: By providing consistent access to skilled practitioners, PEGS ensures that parents have the opportunity to receive ongoing, timely information, guidance and emotional support.
Workshops and Programmes: PEGS workshops and programmes have been particularly impactful, equipping parents with practical strategies to address CPA along with providing tools to help improve parents’ wellbeing and emotional health

Among the many success stories from 2024 is Jane’s* journey. A mother of two, Jane had experienced years of escalating verbal and physical abuse from her teenage son. Feeling trapped and without support, she turned to PEGS. Through one-to-one sessions and attending EPIC, PEGS' empowerment programme, Jane gained the tools to rebuild her confidence and restore a sense of balance in her home. She shared, "PEGS didn’t just help me as a parent; they helped me find myself again". Jane’s story is just one example of how PEGS’ services have transformed lives, giving hope to families who previously felt hopeless.

The significant increase in referrals is a clear indication that more families are seeking help and that the conversation around CPA is finally gaining momentum. PEGS’ work in 2024 has not only provided life-changing support to thousands of families but also laid the groundwork for a more informed and compassionate society.

As we look to 2025, PEGS remains steadfast in our mission to support parents, challenge societal norms around CPA, and advocate for systemic changes. With continued dedication and community support, PEGS is poised to expand our reach even further, ensuring that no parent faces CPA alone.

*Name changed to protect privacy

January Schedule

Thu, 02 Jan 2025 13:44:00 GMT

Schedule for support: January 2025

The PEGS team is wishing everyone a Happy New Year as we head into 2025! We truly hope that the final part of 2024 was as safe and peaceful as possible for you.

January is a busy month for PEGS, with many support offerings for the parents, carers and guardians in our community. You can find our January schedule below which outlines support available throughout the month.

Please note, all of these services are free to attend and are open only to parents, carers and guardians with a current PEGS referral. Do make sure you’re signed up to our WhatsApp channel and that you’ve joined our private peer support group on Facebook, as this is where we post any updates, changes to the schedule, and the links to access each session.

Support over the Festive Period

Thu, 19 Dec 2024 08:55:53 GMT

Support Services available over the Christmas and New Year period

As PEGS is closed over some of the festive period, we want to remind our community that there are many wonderful organisations and support services available that can offer help if needed. Please know you're not alone, and there are resources ready to assist during this time.

Please note, it is worth checking with your local provider if you are unsure whether it is free to make calls to services. Some services are free to call and this information is below.

The PEGS team are wishing you all a peaceful and safe Christmas and New Year.

Support available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year

Samaritans: Call 116 123 for free, email jo@samaritans.org, or visit https://www.samaritans.org

Shout: Text the word 'SHOUT' to 85258 for free, or visit https://giveusashout.org/

The Silver Line (for anyone aged over 55 experiencing isolation or loneliness) : Call 0800 470 8090 for free, or visit https://www.thesilverline.org.uk/

NHS 111: Call 111 for free and select option 2 for mental health support, or visit https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/?_id=111Website

National Domestic Abuse Helpline (for women who have experienced/are experiencing domestic abuse) : Call 0808 2000 247 for free, or visit https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Combat Stress (for veterans experiencing mental health challenges) : Call 0800 1381 619 for free, or visit https://combatstress.org.uk/

Support available at varying times subject to service scheduling

Men’s Advice Line (for men who have experienced/are experiencing domestic abuse) : Call 0808 8010 327 for free from Monday - Friday 10am - 5pm, or visit https://mensadviceline.org.uk/

LGBT Foundation (for anyone identifying as LGBTQ+) : Call 0345 3 30 30 30 from Monday - Friday 9am - 9pm and Saturday - Sunday 10am - 5.30pm, or visit https://lgbt.foundation/

Cruse Bereavement Support: Call 0808 808 1677 for free (opening hours vary), or visit https://www.cruse.org.uk/

The National Association for People Abused in Childhood (for adults who experienced abuse during childhood) : Call 0808 801 0331 for free from Monday - Thursday 10am - 9pm, and Friday 10am - 6pm, or visit https://napac.org.uk/

The Compassionate Friends (for bereaved families after the death of a child) : Call 0345 123 2304 from 10am - 4pm and from 7pm - 10pm every day, or visit https://www.tcf.org.uk/

The Trussell Trust (for anyone in need of urgent food and related support) : Visit https://www.trussell.org.uk/

Tommy’s (for anyone impacted by stillbirth, miscarriage and premature birth) : Visit https://www.tommys.org/

Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (for anyone impacted by bereavement or suicide) : Visit https://uksobs.com/

Stand Alone (for adults who are estranged from their family) : Visit https://www.standalone.org.uk/

Service Shout Out: Signhealth

Wed, 18 Dec 2024 09:30:31 GMT

Service Shout Out: Signhealth

For this service shout out, we shine a light on Signhealth, the Deaf health charity.

Transforming Lives Through Inclusive Healthcare: The Mission of Sign Health

In a world where inclusivity is increasingly recognised as a cornerstone of effective healthcare, Sign Health, the UK's Deaf health charity, stands out as a beacon of hope and innovation. With a mission to improve the health and wellbeing of Deaf people, Sign Health addresses the unique challenges faced by the Deaf community, ensuring that barriers to care are dismantled and that equality in healthcare becomes a reality.

Sign Health envisions a society where Deaf people enjoy the same opportunities for health and wellbeing as anyone else. Their mission is clear: to reduce health inequalities experienced by Deaf people through advocacy, education, and direct service provision.

At its core, Sign Health believes that healthcare should be accessible, inclusive, and equitable—not limited by communication barriers or systemic neglect.

Deaf people in the UK face significant disparities in healthcare, often linked to communication challenges, lack of awareness among healthcare providers, and systemic barriers. Research shows that Deaf individuals are more likely to experience poor mental and physical health outcomes compared to their hearing counterparts. Sign Health steps in to address these gaps through specialized services, raising awareness, and working with healthcare providers to foster systemic change.

Sign Health’s work spans a variety of vital areas:

1. Therapies

SignHealth provides a groundbreaking BSL Therapy Service, offering free, accessible therapy for Deaf individuals struggling with mental health issues. Delivered in British Sign Language, this service ensures that language is never a barrier to getting the help people need.

2. Advocacy

The charity campaigns tirelessly to highlight the health inequalities faced by the Deaf community. By influencing policy and encouraging healthcare providers to adopt inclusive practices, SignHealth advocates for systemic change.

3. Domestic Abuse Support

Through their DeafHope program, Sign Health offers a specialized domestic abuse service for Deaf individuals. This unique initiative provides support and empowerment in a culturally and linguistically appropriate manner.

4. Accessible Health Information

Sign Health creates BSL videos on a wide range of health topics, ensuring that essential information—such as guidance on COVID-19 or mental health resources—is accessible to all.

5. Social Care

Through its support services, Sign Health assists Deaf people in living independently. These services provide personalized care and support tailored to individual needs.

Sign Health is more than just a charity—it is a lifeline for the Deaf community in the UK, offering hope, empowerment, and advocacy in a healthcare system that often overlooks their needs. By championing inclusivity and accessibility, Sign Health is building a future where Deaf people can thrive, unburdened by systemic barriers.

To learn more or get involved, visit their official website: https://signhealth.org.uk/. Together, we can ensure that healthcare truly becomes a universal right, accessible to all.

PEGS Christmas Information 2024

Tue, 17 Dec 2024 10:46:14 GMT

PEGS 2024 Christmas Closure and Service Information

PEGS will be closed from Tuesday 24th December 2024 and will reopen on Monday 30th December until Tuesday 31st December 2024. PEGS will be closed on Wednesday 1st January 2025. PEGS will reopen and operate as usual from Thursday 2nd January 2025.

During periods of closure, the PEGS team will be taking some well deserved time off work and will not be able to be contacted. There are, however, many organisations that can provide support out-of-hours and these can be found on the PEGS website: www.pegsupport.co.uk/useful-contacts

PEGS social media channels may remain active throughout the festive period, though please note that this is likely to have been pre-scheduled by staff prior to closure and therefore does not mean that social media channels are being monitored by staff.

The PEGS team appreciates your understanding and wishes you a safe and comfortable festive period.

Michelle John: Businesswoman of the Year 2024

Fri, 13 Dec 2024 12:40:08 GMT

PEGS Founder, Michelle John, Wins Prestigious Women’s Business Award

We are thrilled to announce that our founding director, Michelle John, has been recognised at the Women’s Business Awards 2024! This global celebration of extraordinary women in business brought together 300 finalists from 92 countries, competing across 21 categories. Streamed live from Cheltenham, UK, the event showcased incredible talent, innovation, and leadership, and we’re proud to see Michelle’s hard work and dedication acknowledged on this prestigious stage.

Michelle’s tireless efforts through PEGS have made a profound impact on the lives of parental figures experiencing abusive behaviours from their children. Her innovative approach and unwavering commitment to this often-overlooked issue earned her the judges’ admiration and one of the evening’s coveted awards.

Reflecting on this achievement, Michelle shared: “It’s an honour to receive this recognition. This award is not just a reflection of my work, but also the incredible support from our team, our partners, and the community who we support, who inspire me every day.” The event’s founder, Angela De Souza, also praised this year’s winners, saying: “There is nothing quite like celebrating the accomplishments of our businesswomen. This year, we received some truly outstanding entries, making the judges' decisions incredibly challenging. While only one woman could win in each category, every entrant is a winner. Each woman stands tall, remains determined to succeed, and carries hope for the future—a true winning attitude. I am immensely proud of all the remarkable individuals in business who continue to strive for excellence and inspire those around them.”

This award is not just a moment of pride for Michelle but also for everyone involved in the work of PEGS. It highlights the importance of addressing the challenges faced by families experiencing child-to-parent abuse and reinforces our mission to bring lasting change to this area.

To all our supporters, partners, and the families we work with—thank you for inspiring us every day and helping us make a difference. This recognition is as much yours as it is ours.

Guest blog: Abuse in Later Life by Carrie Bower

Tue, 03 Dec 2024 15:44:38 GMT

Guest blog: Abuse in Later Life by Carrie Bower

This guest blog is brought to us by Carrie Bower, founder of organisation 'Visible Later Lives' and owner and host of podcast 'Let's Get Visible'. In this blog, Carrie brings her specialist insight and expertise to shine a light on abuse experienced in later life.

To read, please click below:

Service Shout Out: Warrington Borough Council Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service

Tue, 19 Nov 2024 12:21:24 GMT

Service Shout Out: Warrington Borough Council Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service

At PEGS, we love to champion other services who are doing brilliant work in supporting those impacted by CPA. This service shout out features a fantastic guest blog by Billy Cragg-Hughes, Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service Lead at Warrington Borough Council Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service:

"Our CPA service is designed to provide assistance to families faced with the complexities surrounding being harmed by their child of any age. The service works directly with children and young people aged 6 to 17 who exhibit harmful behaviours, offering therapeutic interventions tailored to their needs. Additionally, we engage in comprehensive family work, recognizing that addressing CPA often necessitates understanding and addressing underlying family dynamics and trauma. We also work directly with parents who are being harmed by there child who is 18 years of age and over.

Our primary goal is to provide a supportive environment where both the child and their family members can feel understood and empowered. Through therapeutic interventions and whole-family approaches, we aim to foster healthier relationships and equip parents with the tools they need to navigate and address the challenges they face. It's essential for parents to know that they are not alone in facing these difficulties, and our service strives to provide them with the support and guidance they need.

Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse is indeed a multifaceted issue that can impact families from various backgrounds. Research suggests that it affect up to 10% of families but the truth is this complexed abuse takes place in many more homes but due to the stigma and shame many go decades without seeking support. Facing abuse and harmful behaviour behind closed doors and left dealing with the stigma and shame alone. Highlighting the importance of dedicated support services like ours to address this issue effectively.

If you have any further questions or would like to discuss our services in more detail, please feel free to reach out. We are here to provide assistance and support to families in need."

Blog written by Billy Cragg-Hughes, Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service Lead at Warrington Borough Council Child/Adult Child to Parent Abuse Service

Organisations Across the Globe: Parent Real Talk

Thu, 07 Nov 2024 13:49:23 GMT

Parent Real Talk's Executive Summary 2024

For this blog, we head oversees to the United States of America to shine a light on an incredible organisation, Parent Real Talk.

Tabatha Ross-Brown is President & Chief Executive Officer of Parent Real Talk, a nonprofit organisation which focuses on supporting parents, carers, and guardians who experience abuse from their child. Parent Real Talk aims to promote the resilience and emotional wellbeing or parents and carers, and aims to stregthen family relationships.

Tabatha has now released Parent Real Talk's 2024 Executive Summary which is full of fascinating insights into the lived experiences of parents, carers and guardians across the USA and Canada. To read more from the Executive Summary, click below to download the full report, or head to the Parent Real Talk website at www.parentrealtalk.com.

Service Shout Out: The PDA Space

Wed, 30 Oct 2024 13:09:43 GMT

Service Shout Out: The PDA Space

The PDA Space is an invaluable resource for families, educators, and professionals navigating Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), a profile on the autism spectrum. Created by Nicola Reekie, a therapist and parent of a child with PDA, the platform offers a range of support options, from one-on-one coaching to workshops and webinars, aimed at helping families create more harmonious environments.

The website emphasises a holistic, solution-focused approach, combining practical strategies with emotional support. One of its signature features is the PDA Summit, an annual event bringing together experts to raise awareness and share insights into managing PDA.

Visitors can explore specialised resources that promote understanding of the PDA profile, equipping parents with the tools needed to manage stress and reduce conflicts at home. The PDA Space’s emphasis on compassion, practical advice, and community makes it an essential hub for anyone affected by PDA.

PEGS provides support to parental figures who have children with a PDA profile and it is a privilege to be able to learn from specialist organisations such as the PDA Space.

To find out more about the work of the PDA Space, please head to www.thepdaspace.com

AJ Bell Futures Foundation Donates £1,000 to PEGS After Employee Nomination

Tue, 29 Oct 2024 13:09:00 GMT

AJ Bell Futures Foundation donates to PEGS

At AJ Bell, helping people invest in their future is our core purpose, and so naturally also sits at the heart of the charitable foundation we have established. The AJ Bell Futures Foundation, a UK registered charity, invites their employees to nominate charities and causes that are personally meaningful to them and align with the Foundation’s objective of helping people build better futures. One employee, touched by the incredible support they received from PEGS in navigating child-to-parent abuse (CPA), shared their story and nominated PEGS for a donation.

The nomination was successful, and we are thrilled that PEGS will receive a very kind and generous £1,000 donation. This contribution will help to continue our vital work, providing resources and support to parental figures facing difficult situations.

The Foundation is proud to back causes that make a personal impact on employees and help them bring positive change to their communities. With this donation, we hope to empower PEGS to keep supporting more families in need.

For more information about the AJ Bell Futures Foundation, visit: www.ajbell.co.uk/group/futures-foundation

PEGS Professional Training

Fri, 11 Oct 2024 13:19:38 GMT

Train with PEGS

Why Training with PEGS is Crucial for Addressing Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) is a complex and often misunderstood issue that impacts families across various settings, including homes, schools, and social services. PEGS (Parental Education Growth Support) is at the forefront of supporting professionals to better understand and respond to CPA, providing invaluable training programs that empower individuals and organisations to make a difference.

Here’s six reasons why training with PEGS is a game changer for professionals:

1. Specialised CPA Knowledge

PEGS focuses exclusively on CPA, an area of domestic abuse that is frequently hidden and often goes unreported. Our organisation's deep expertise ensures that participants gain a comprehensive understanding of the prevalence, signs, and impacts of CPA. PEGS’ courses are designed to shed light on both the emotional and psychological dynamics of parent-child relationships, offering insights grounded in research and practice. Professionals come away with a stronger grasp of how CPA manifests in different environments and what support can be provided for those with lived experience.

2. Tailored Tools and Practical Skills

PEGS goes beyond theoretical knowledge by offering practical tools that professionals can immediately implement in their day-to-day work. Whether you're a teacher, social worker, healthcare provider, or law enforcement officer, PEGS provides you with actionable techniques for supporting CPA situations.

For example, our PRAM© (PEGS Risk Awareness Model) training equips professionals with tools to recognise CPA patterns and respond safely and effectively. This training is essential for equipping professionals with the tools necessary to create a safer and more supportive environment for families facing CPA.

3. Customisable and Sector-Specific Training

One of the unique benefits of training with PEGS is the organisation’s commitment to tailoring training programs to the specific needs of different professional sectors. Recognising that each field faces distinct challenges when dealing with CPA, PEGS offers customised training modules that speak directly to your organisation’s unique context.

Whether you work in education, health services, law enforcement, or social care, PEGS provides training designed to help you support CPA cases effectively in your specific role. These tailored sessions address the daily challenges professionals face, and even offer shorter awareness talks if needed, ensuring that no matter your time constraints, you can still access the training necessary to enhance your work with CPA-affected families.

4. Collaborative and Research-Informed Approach

PEGS places a strong emphasis on collaboration, partnering with leading professionals across sectors to create a community of shared learning. Our work with a vast range of agencies ensures that our training reflects the latest developments in research and practice. By learning with PEGS, professionals can benefit from shared knowledge and contribute to the growing body of understanding around CPA.

Training programs are constantly updated with new case studies, research findings, and feedback from professionals in the field. This commitment to staying at the forefront of CPA response allows PEGS to deliver not only the most up-to-date information but also methods that have proven successful across various real-world contexts.

5. Supporting Policy Development

PEGS doesn’t stop at individual training. We also offer employer support for organisations looking to develop or refine their CPA policies through our Child to Parent Abuse Employer Covenant. Whether your team is just beginning to address CPA or has already established procedures, PEGS can assist in creating comprehensive, evidence-based policies that reflect best practices. By working with PEGS, professionals can contribute to long-lasting, institutional change that enhances both awareness and response capabilities within their organisations.

6. Positive Impact on Families

At the core of PEGS' mission is the goal to support those experiencing CPA in a compassionate and effective manner. By investing in professional training, participants are better equipped to offer meaningful support to affected families. Whether it's guiding parents towards support resources or responding to disclosures of difficult incidents, the skills gained from PEGS training make a tangible difference in family outcomes.

Training with PEGS is an investment in both professional development and community wellbeing. With our vast expertise, practical tools, and customisable approaches, PEGS empowers professionals across various sectors to effectively address CPA.

If you're a professional working with families affected by CPA, or if you simply want to expand your knowledge in this crucial area, consider training with PEGS. By training with PEGS, you’ll not only advance your own skills but also play a key role in helping families overcome one of the most challenging forms of domestic abuse.

What do those who have trained with us say?

100% said they would recommend PEGS training to a colleague

100% said materials and resources will improve their practice

100% said their knowledge of CPA has increased

100% said their practice will improve due to the training

Quotes from delegates

“Great delivery of this really insightful session. Informative and thought provoking information”

“Not a single minute was wasted as all the content covered, resources shared and group discussion was either practically useful, emotionally impactful or thought provoking.”

“Brilliant session, wonderfully paced and well considered with lived experiences sensitively explored and integrated into the session”

“The training is conducted with empathy but gets the facts across. Well balanced”

“Great course - relevant, useful and informative”

“Thank you so much, I have taken loads from the session today, the resources will be incredibly helpful too”

“What a session, fantastic trainers, excellent delivery, interaction, resources and so much knowledge a fab day of learning, everyone should access this training - Bravo”

“Hearing the reality was so eye opening, the statistics were shocking and I learned so much, also about things that I would never have considered to be part of child to parent abuse. Thank you so much for the resources, these will be very useful”

To find out more, visit us at www.pegsevents.co.uk or email us at training@pegsupport.com.

Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day

Wed, 09 Oct 2024 16:52:52 GMT

Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day

Raising Awareness for Child to Parent Abuse: October 14th

Launched on October 14th 2022 by social enterprise PEGS, Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) Awareness Day is a day dedicated to drawing attention to a form of domestic abuse that is often overlooked: the abuse of parents by their children. Child to parent abuse is a growing but largely silent issue, affecting families from all walks of life. This day serves as an important reminder that family abuse is not just about intimate partner abuse—it can occur in the parent-child relationship as well.

What is Child to Parent Abuse?

Child to Parent Abuse refers to any kind of physical, verbal, emotional, or financial abuse that a child directs towards their parent or caregiver. While it is more commonly seen during adolescence, CPA can begin at any age. Parental figures report experiencing behaviours such as:

Physical abuse : Hitting, kicking, or other physical actions toward parents.
Verbal abuse : Yelling, threatening, or belittling language.
Emotional abuse : Manipulating, controlling, or using emotional tactics to harm the parent.
Financial abuse : Stealing or controlling access to money and resources.

What makes CPA unique—and difficult to talk about—is that it challenges the traditional view of the parent-child relationship. Parents are often viewed as the ones in control, so when that dynamic is flipped, it can be difficult to recognise, admit, or address. This imbalance makes it easy for child to parent abuse to remain hidden, even as it devastates families.

How Common is Child to Parent Abuse?

Although there is a lack of comprehensive data on CPA, studies suggest it is far more common than many might think. In some countries, it's estimated that around 5-10% of families experience some form of child to parent abuse, though it is likely underreported. Many parents feel isolated, ashamed, or confused about what is happening in their homes, which leads to silence and underreporting.

The secrecy surrounding CPA also contributes to the lack of public understanding. Because many people don’t know this kind of abuse exists—or how to recognize it—parents often don’t seek help. They may blame themselves, feel that they’ve failed in their role as a parent, or fear judgement from others.

The Impact of Child to Parent Abuse

Child to parent abuse has profound and far-reaching effects on families. For parents, the emotional toll can be enormous. Feelings of fear, shame, helplessness, and isolation often accompany the experience. Many parents feel trapped, unable to talk about their situation with others for fear of being blamed or judged. They may also struggle with guilt, feeling they’ve failed as parents or that they deserve the abuse.

This type of abuse also destabilises the family environment. Other children in the household may be affected by the aggression, either as direct targets or witnesses to the conflict. The stress, anxiety, and tension can tear apart the fabric of family life, creating long-term emotional damage for all involved.

Get involved

Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day on October 14th is a crucial moment to acknowledge and address the hidden epidemic of CPA. By raising awareness, offering support, and opening up conversations about this form of domestic abuse, we can break the silence surrounding child to parent abuse and help families rebuild healthy, supportive relationships.

If you are affected by CPA, know that you are not alone—and there is help available. Let’s use this day to foster understanding, reduce stigma, and create safe, loving spaces for all families.

PEGS would love for you to get involved on CPA Awareness day, you can use the #standwithpegs #cpaawarenessday or even download the logo for the day itself. Together we can make change for those who need us.

Kinship Care Week

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Tue, 08 Oct 2024 10:37:16 GMT

Kinship Care Week: 7 to 13 October 2024

Kinship Care refers to a family arrangement where children are raised by relatives or close family friends when their biological parents are unable to care for them. This can occur due to various reasons. Kinship caregivers, often grandparents or aunts and uncles, provide the children with a stable, loving environment while preserving familial bonds and cultural heritage.

Kinship Care Week, celebrated in early October, shines a spotlight on the unique experiences of kinship families, raising awareness about their needs and the importance of offering them proper support. The week emphasises the critical role that kinship caregivers play in providing children with a safe and nurturing environment, often without the same support or recognition that foster or adoptive parents receive.

The Importance of Kinship Care

Kinship care plays a crucial role in maintaining family connections, offering children continuity, and reducing the trauma often associated with being removed from their biological parents. Children in kinship care often experience better outcomes than those placed in non-relative foster care, as they remain in familiar surroundings, maintain their sense of identity, and stay connected with their extended family.

Kinship caregivers typically step in during times of crisis, sometimes with little notice or preparation, and they often face unique challenges. These challenges include navigating complex legal systems, financial strain, and balancing their caregiving responsibilities with work or other family duties. Many kinship carers take on this role without formal training or support, driven by their love and commitment to the child.

Why Kinship Care Week Matters

Kinship Care Week provides an opportunity to raise awareness of these issues and advocate for greater recognition and support for kinship carers. It encourages communities, policymakers, and organisations to acknowledge the essential role these caregivers play and to ensure they have access to the necessary resources. The week also allows kinship families to come together, share their stories, and celebrate the resilience and dedication of those who step in to care for children. It’s a time to promote policy changes that provide kinship families with the financial, legal, and emotional support they need to thrive.

For more information, visit www.kinship.org.uk

A tribute to Dani

Fri, 06 Sep 2024 07:44:52 GMT

We are truly saddened to announce the tragic passing of our fabulous Dani. Dani was truly dedicated to PEGS, having been a part of the organisation since the beginning, and a fantastic friend to our founder Michelle for many years. Dani had listened to, supported and empowered hundreds of people accessing PEGS’ services over the years, as a CPA practitioner and wellbeing lead, and most recently with responsibility for triaging referrals.

Words can’t express how much she will be missed not only by our community of parental figures, but also by the entire PEGS team. Dani’s lively spirit and bright outlook brought so much positivity to all of us, and she was a driving force behind us constantly improving our services. Dani was truly one of the kind, and PEGS and the wider world are poorer places without her.

Our thoughts are with Dani’s children and all those who loved her at this truly devastating time. We are of course encouraging the team to take the time they need to process this sudden loss.

We will make sure her family see the kind words being shared since her passing, and we thank you all for your well wishes and patience at this difficult time for us as a team.

��

Neurodiversity and CPA focus for headline speaker

Thu, 05 Sep 2024 12:55:45 GMT

Our headline speaker for the CPA Conference this October really is an expert when it comes to Child to Parent Abuse. Dr Amanda Holt has been researching themes relating to CPA for nearly 20 years, and even wrote the UK’s very first book on the topic! This was followed by an edited collection which focused on how to support families experiencing CPA.

A Professor of Criminology at the University of Roehampton in London, Dr Holt has been involved with PEGS for a number of years and sits on our Advisory Board, as well as being a member of the Risk of Harm committee for Family Lives.

Dr Holt recently completed a project funded by the Mayor of London which looked specifically at CPA in London where the child was of adolescent age.

Her headline speaker slot at the conference will focus on Child to Parent Abuse in Neurodivergent Contexts.

She will share with audiences the findings of her recently completed project about CPA in relation to neurodivergent children and young people. This took the form of interviews with 15 mothers from across the UK whose child or children have a diagnosis of autism, AH(H)D and/or FASD and are also displaying CPA behaviours.

As part of the research, Dr Holt explored their experiences of CPA and how the context of neurodivergence had shaped these experiences. She will also cover an overview of what parents and carers had shared with her had been helpful in terms of the support they had received.

Everyone attending the conference will also have an opportunity to take part in a Q&A at the end of Dr Holt’s session, where they’ll be able to ask her any questions about her important research.

We cannot wait to hear Dr Holt speak as we know it will provide a fascinating insight into the lives of families who are experiencing CPA and also have neurodivergent children – something professionals attending are sure to find valuable in their working life going forward.

If you’ve not yet purchased your ticket, you can do so by heading to www.pegsevents.co.uk . The conference is a virtual event which takes place on Monday 14 ^th October; please note, there are discounted tickets available for attendees from charities and not-for-profit organisations, and the ticket also includes access to a wealth of information on a specially-created resources platform.

Packed schedule for PEGS parents from September

Fri, 30 Aug 2024 07:46:26 GMT

At PEGS, we are delighted to be increasing the number of regular activities that parents, carers and guardians can access each month.

Our long-running practitioner-led sessions remain a huge source of support for those experiencing CPA, giving them a safe space to share their concerns, challenges, and progress with other parents in a similar situation – as well as our trained staff members.

From September, we’ll be adding two new practitioner-led sessions per week, meaning there will be a total of seven (five during the day in the week, and two on weekday evenings).

Sessions are each an hour long, held on Zoom (with links shared in our private peer support Facebook group and on our parent WhatsApp channel), and run on:

Mondays at 12pm
Tuesdays at 11am (brand new session) and 7pm
Wednesdays at 10am
Thursdays at 1.30pm and 8pm (brand new session)
Fridays at 10am.

We also recognise that are specific groups of parents who would like to chat to others within a session – hence our monthly male-only practitioner-led sessions (last Friday of the month, 12.30pm).

And we’re now adding a specific meeting for parental figures from the adoption and fostering communities as of September (second Wednesday of each month, 12pm).

We’ll also shortly be sharing links to sign up to any of our September Movement to Music sessions (first Wednesday of the month at 7pm, second, third and fourth Friday of the month at 11am – all sessions 45 minutes).

In addition, we’ve got our half-hour Wellbeing Workshops (first Monday of the month, 11am) and our bi-weekly Wellbeing Walks in South Derbyshire (every other Tuesday, 9.30am).

Our Lead CPA Practitioner Sophia said: “We know how valuable parent sessions are for those experiencing CPA and they have remained a core part of our offering since PEGS launched in 2020. We’re pleased to be able to offer additional sessions each week from September onwards, and we look forward to welcoming parental figures to our new monthly practitioner-led sessions for those from the adoption and fostering communities.”

PEGS Wellbeing Practitioner

Fri, 23 Aug 2024 09:54:13 GMT

PEGS Wellbeing Practitioner

With South Derbyshire Healthier Communities Fund choosing PEGS as one of their grantees this

year, means it has enabled us to have a wellbeing practitioner who will for the next 12 months be

providing wellbeing support to parents, carers and guardians who are living in the South Derbyshire

area.

This project will see our wellbeing practitioner delivering wellbeing workshops, supporting with

individual wellbeing support and plans as well as creating self-guided workbooks so that parents can

continue their wellbeing journeys. There will also be weekly wellbeing walks in South Derbyshire

where you can have the opportunity to walk with the team, talk or just be present in nature.

If you would like to access our wellbeing practitioner and you live in the South Derbyshire area, Lorraine

cannot wait to hear from you. Get intouch with admin@pegsupport.com to find out more

Looking after you is saying I matter too, and you do!

You can find out more about the South Derbyshire Healthier communities fund at

http://www.derbyshire.gov.uk/

PEGS celebrates The VC Gallery

Mon, 19 Aug 2024 08:27:04 GMT

At PEGS, we’re proud to work alongside many fantastic organisations who help to support communities and improve society. Each month, we like to highlight the work of one such organisation – and today is the turn of The VC Gallery.

The VC Gallery was founded by Barry John MBE and is located in Pembrokeshire, West Wales. Barry is an artist and former serviceman, who created the gallery to provide a supportive environment for veterans and the wider community.

Our Founding Director Michelle has known and been involved with the VC since they first started more than ten years ago, and has seen first-hand how the VC has been able to reach those in the local community who were often described as ‘hard to reach’ or ‘invisible’ to services but yet were in plain sight.

Having identifying the issues they often experienced settling into civilian life, Barry has been able to provide these individuals with the support, tools and guidance to navigate their new life whilst also educating the local community and services on the barriers they and their families can face. This has provided a way to encourage stronger community connections and cohesion.

The VC Gallery is more than just an art space: it’s a hub for social engagement and support which hosts a variety of exhibitions throughout the year, showcasing the work of both local and international artists. From paintings and sculptures to photography and mixed media, the gallery’s exhibitions are diverse and thought-provoking. Each exhibit is carefully curated to highlight different aspects of the human experience, often reflecting themes of resilience, identity, and transformation.

One of the stand-out aspects of the VC Gallery is its dedicated support for veterans. The gallery offers art therapy sessions and creative workshops tailored specifically for veterans and their families, helping them to express their experiences and emotions through art. This initiative not only aids in mental health recovery but also fosters a sense of camaraderie and purpose among participants. The VC is more than just art, with the organisation having their own ‘Dig for Victory ‘allotment, you will find ex-service personnel and members of the community sowing, picking and making food with the produce they have grown.

The Gallery is deeply embedded in the local community, working closely with schools, local businesses, and other community groups. Educational programmes and workshops are a regular feature, aiming to inspire the next generation of artists and creative thinkers. The gallery also offers volunteer opportunities, allowing community members to contribute their time and skills to support its operations.

The VC Gallery is a testament to the power of art in bringing people together and fostering a sense of community. Its commitment to supporting veterans, engaging the local community, and promoting artistic expression makes it a cultural gem worth exploring. You will leave the VC feeling inspired and uplifted by the incredible stories and artworks that are showcased throughout the numerous hubs that they host.

You can find out more about the gallery at www.thevcgallery.com .

The importance of relaxation

Thu, 15 Aug 2024 07:38:23 GMT

Today (August 15 ^th ) marks International Relaxation Day – so we asked the parents in our peer support group, as well as our staff, to share with us some pictures of them relaxing. We’ve posted a selection of the photos over on our social media pages, so do check them out!

We also wanted to use the opportunity to explore the topic of relaxation here on the blog. That’s because we know parents experiencing CPA are sadly likely to feel stressed, overwhelmed and have little time for themselves, on top of feeling the normal so-called ‘parent guilt’ associated with relaxing or enjoying hobbies once you’ve had children.

And we also know that professionals working with these families – whether it’s our own PEGS staff or the social workers, doctors and nurses, teachers, charity leads or any other professionals whose work relates to CPA – may need to take a moment or two out of their busy schedule too!

What is Relaxation Day?

Relaxation Day was founded in the USA in 1985 and was actually the idea of a nine-year-old boy from Michigan! The premise is taking time out of the day to relax, or even learning a new relaxation technique. It’s gained popularity over the years and, with widespread use of the internet these days, it’s now a globally-recognised awareness day.

Relaxation Techniques

There are many different types of relaxation techniques, with some of the most popular being yoga, meditation and mindfulness. In fact, there are so many it would be impossible to cover all of them here. But what’s clear is that, if you find one which works for you, it can be incredibly useful for your mental health and emotional wellbeing, as well as your physical health too.

Put simply, the ‘stress response’ when hormones are released because you’re experiencing a stressful situation raises your blood pressure and your heart rate. Relaxation techniques do the exact opposite, as well as reducing tension in your muscles, releasing chemicals that reduce pain (which can help for those with chronic pain), and even supporting positive digestion.

If you’re looking for inspiration for new techniques, then the International Relaxation Day website has a wealth of resources.

Other good sources of information are Health Guide , Mind , and the NHS .

Other ways to relax

The good news is you don’t necessarily have to roll out the yoga mat or spend hours each day practising deep breathing – most techniques can be mastered with regular practice of just a few minutes each day.

There are also lots of other activities and hobbies which can be a go-to to help you relax. Here are some of the top ideas our PEGS parents and staff came up with:

Reading
Gardening
Walking the dog
Cuddling the cat
Cross-stitch
Painting
Spending time in nature
Taking a stroll
Watching the sun rise or set

If you’d like to check out the pictures, head to Facebook , Instagram , LinkedIn or X !

Hourglass’ OATH aims to reduce abuse towards older people

Thu, 08 Aug 2024 07:28:11 GMT

Today we wanted to highlight a fantastic campaign being led by the charity Hourglass .

The organisation – which aims to end abuse towards older people – recently launched OATH.

The Older Age Tomorrow’s Hope (OATH) campaign is their bid to make society safer by eradicating this type of abuse before 2050.

Currently more than 2.5million older people experience abuse, harm, neglect or exploitation every year. The charity wants to highlight that the voices of this portion of society are rarely heard, despite them being victims of the same forms of abuse as all other age groups.

Everyone is encouraged to join the OATH campaign. By signing, they agree to:

Create change by supporting calls for services and strategies which focus on creating a safer ageing society.
Ensure parity by supporting investment in specialist services focusing on education, prevention and recovery specifically for older people.
Provide the rationale by promoting research and evidence which underpins decision-making around legislation and policy development.
Influence and build consensus by promoting OATH and sharing key messages.
Become a community champion by highlighting the need for a safer ageing society and inter-generational understanding and support.

Why sign up to OATH? In Hourglass’ words: “Because we need to create a Safer Ageing Society, where we can all grow old safely, without fear of abuse. Safer ageing should no longer be a hope, it should be a promise.”

PEGS has, of course, already signed up and we’d encourage you all – as individuals and organisations – to take the OATH and join the campaign to make society safer for older people.

Speaking when we signed up, our founder Michelle John said: “PEGS is delighted to share the news that we have signed Hourglass’ OATH, voicing both our support and commitment to end the abuse and neglect of older people. PEGS is proud to be standing alongside Hourglass and raising awareness of their campaign to create a safer ageing society.”

If you’d like to find out more about Hourglass, and sign up to the OATH, then head to their website for more information.

And if you’d like to hear from Hourglass CEO Richard Robinson, he’s speaking at our CPA International Conference on October 14th alongside a host of other experts. You can get your ticket for the virtual conference at www.pegsevents.co.uk .

Seven Speakers Revealed for PEGS CPA Conference

Wed, 31 Jul 2024 08:00:00 GMT

We’re counting down the weeks now until our third virtual CPA conference. And if, like us, you’re eagerly awaiting the 14 th October, then you may have been closely following our social media. We’ve been revealing the speakers at the event one by one across our Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and Twitter – and we really do have a schedule packed full of the ‘who’s who’ from across academia, charities, the public sector and many more related fields.

If you’ve missed any of our recent speaker announcements, then don’t worry because this blog is all about the seven spectacular speakers we have already revealed.

So, without delay, let’s hear all about them!

His Honour Judge James Burbidge KC

Judge Burbidge KC has an incredible wealth of knowledge within the legal system, having qualified as a barrister in 1979. Starting off as a law tutor, then an Assistant Recorder and Recorder (part-time judge) for criminal and civil courts, he was appointed Queen’s Counsel in 2003. This saw Judge Burbidge take on the most serious criminal law cases – while he was also head of St Philips’ Chamber which had more than 150 members and 40 staff, as well as being Head of Professional Development for the Midlands Circuit – devising and running advocacy and ethics courses for trainee and newly-qualified barristers. He is now Resident Judge of Worcester and Hereford, continuing to support in the education of others as well as undertaking advocacy and courses in criminal law across the world, including in Albania, Nigeria, Singapore and the Hague.

Rasul Freelain

Rasul is not only a retired Police Sergeant from Chicago, with many years’ experience of dealing with domestic abuse cases, he’s also written a book on the tragic CPA case which saw Sheila von Wiese-Mack lose her life at the hands of daughter Heather Mack. The detective is now a senior consulting at The Protecting Lambs Co, and provides CPA awareness training to professionals too.Rasul got in touch with us while he was writing his book, having found us on social media, and we’re delighted he’s able to join us at the conference.

Kenny Gibson

Kenny is NHS Safeguarding’s Deputy Director and a long-time friend of PEGS!

Kenny’s role sees him oversee safeguarding including all forms of neglect, abuse, exploitation, radicalisation and violence – and he’s the national lead on trauma-informed care.His career began as a laundry assistant at a mental health unit, before he trained as a nurse and later a midwife. Kenny then held various operational, management and strategic posts within community and public health, stepping up as Head of Safeguarding for NHS England prior to his current role. He was also awarded an MBE in January 2022 for his services to healthcare leadership.

Joe Lockley

Joe is another long-time friend of PEGS – he’s the founder of Brightstar, an organisation which empowers young people to thrive and brings different sectors together using boxing as a vehicle for change. Since 2016, Brightstar has expanded from a voluntary-run organisation working with six people to a multi-centre set-up with 28 full-time staff and 30 volunteers supporting over 600 young people from across the West Midlands every week. As well as being awarded the Queen’s Award for Voluntary Service (the highest

award a voluntary group can receive), Joe has been internationally recognised, speaking at the World Expo in Dubai, helping shape sports development work in different countries, and – most recently – being invited to speak at the UNESCO ‘Change the Game’ Conference in Paris.

Richard Robinson

Richard is the Chief Executive at Hourglass, a charity committed to stopping the abuse of older people. He has over two decades of experience in the third sector across education, international development, medical, and arts and culture organisations. He’s also a former journalist and led The Legacy List (Olympic 2012 charity), as well as working on regeneration and culture programmes in East London, leprosy organisations in India, and a music industry charity.

So there’s a real wealth of information that Richard will be able to share with us from across all his experience within the charity and voluntary sector.

Jeremy Todd

Jeremy is the CEO of Family Lives, with a background in counselling, health services and the criminal justice system. He regularly appears on radio and television to speak about family and parenting topics, and is also a key note speaker on issues ranging from family engagement in education to family health and wellbeing. Before joining Family Lives in 2009, Jeremy worked in a number of NHS Trusts and within Holloway Prison, also leading organisations in community development and implementing nationally-accredited training schemes and guidelines for professionals working with young people. We’re delighted to have him speaking at our conference!

Amanda Warburton-Wynn

Amanda is an independent researcher and consultant specialising in domestic abuse and sexual violence of older people, people with disabilities and carers. As well as giving guest lectures at Birmingham City University, Amanda has had several papers published by the Journal of Adult Protection and delivered webinars for Hourglass, Making Research Count, and local government events.

We’re really looking forward to hearing from Amanda at the conference!

Make sure you’re following our social media channels, where we’ll be unveiling more speakers in the coming weeks. And if reading this blog has made you decide you definitely need to be part of the conference, then you can head over to

www.pegsevents.co.uk to secure your ticket today! (There’s even a discount if you’re from a charity or not-for-profit organisation).

Hope to see you there!

Lived Experience Blog Trigger Warning

Wed, 17 Jul 2024 13:58:31 GMT

This blog post outlines a parent's lived experience of CPA and does contain content that may be upsetting.

What do you mean you’re scared of your own child? Don’t be silly, they are your child, if you are feeling scared of them then perhaps you need to work on why you feel scared, its not their actions, its how you are perceiving them, all kids say things they don’t mean, don’t pay any attention to it…… I looked at the professional, had this really just been said to me after I had told someone who should have been helping us, how bad things were and how scared we all were of my beautiful, incredible child.. a child of 14 , but my child, a sibling too .. someone I was and am proud of, a child who I would do anything for, a child who deserved to be supported, encouraged a child who I love unconditionally even though they had tried to kill me and their sibling… yes you did read that right .. and yes I I did ask for help long before it got to this stage. But I was simply ignored, told the situation was not severe enough, that I was not their concern, mind neither were my other children as according to the professionals it was solely my responsibility to not let harm come to anyone. Let me take you back to the beginning, before I knew this was a ‘thing’ that it had a name and before I found support.

Domestic abuse is still seen as only something that happens between partners, married, living together or not. Yet this is not the case at all.

The paragraph above may shock you, but it was our family’s reality. I had reached out continuously to professionals such as early help, the police, doctors, social care for a few years prior to the major incident but was told it was typical behaviours, or we don’t meet criteria, that my child did not want to access support or even consent to a referral, that we are over reacting, you name it, it was said to me over and over again, but all the time I was told this, living at home was not living it was surviving and I’m not entirely sure we managed that fully. Door after door, day after day everything was closed in our faces, what remained was hopelessness, fear and worry, yet not one person saw, heard or believed us and this gave unbelievable power to the one person we were all in fear of.

Before I continue, I need to be very very clear, I adore and love my child, every bit of them , I did then and I do now and I will always have their back and advocate for them. I don’t blame them for what happened but I do blame the system for allowing it to happen. I will not share who I am or who they are, they are my world and protecting them is my priority. They are not a monster, they don’t need to be villainised, they are no longer behaving that way towards us but I still refuse to out them – they matter to me, so does our journey and so does highlighting this but nothing comes before them.

At first when we started to notice things, we put it down to typical behaviours that children can show, we found different ways to communicate, changed boundaries and consequences, picked our battles and reached out for help – you know to the services that say get in touch we won’t judge or shame you, we want to help? yes to them, who did exactly that. We went on this cycle for years, we completely got rid of consequences in the typical sense as that just caused so many incidents and harm to us, plus the house was being destroyed, doors and cupboards broken, windows, verbal abuse, coercion and control, manipulation, gaslighting, threats, physical assaults with and without weapons, you name it, it happened. During this time the behaviour became abusive directly towards me and also a sibling, now I’m not talking the odd swear word , I am talking extreme abusive behaviours that also caused multiple injuries and seen us in A & E on more than one occasion, all of this was reported by me to those who should have helped. I begged, pleaded, cried, you name it we did it, but we were met with you need to do more, they don’t mean it, they wont go through with it… then one day my child tried to poison me, they told me how and they also told someone who had finally come out to see what the fuss was about…. You are probably thinking we would have support at this point, nope what I was met with was ‘your child is upset you wouldn’t drink what they made’ I looked at the professional and said you did just hear what they said and the professional said yes but they have said they feel they are trying to make amends but you wouldn’t drink it. I told the professional to drink it if they were so sure there was no risk ‘no I can’t do that especially as they have said they will poison it’ Laughable in one way seriously concerning in another. Nothing was consumed by anyone, professional left never to be seen again. Things from this point ramped up at great speed, daily incidents of physical harm, intimidation to all in the house, destroying of property, nonattendance to school, me leaving my job, threats of extreme violence if anyone was asleep so this saw me not sleeping as much as possible, spending my days trying to avoid an incident and my nights worrying about tomorrow, hoping we would all be here. We installed cameras as the behaviours became so abusive. Even when the police came, my child would present calm, in control and as though we had made it up against them, time after time, and then when they left further incidents occurred. We met everyone we could think of, challenged professionals’ decisions to not support us, but we were always met with the same, they don’t mean it, it can’t be that bad, you are responsible for keeping everyone safe, we won’t parent for you, that’s your role. it went on and on.

Finally someone decided to come and see us all, well that caused more harm at that point – the professional walked in sat down and then proceeded to tell my child what we had told them, in front of us, my child erupted , the professional however couldn’t wait to leave the house, back to safety in their car. Us? well we were left in the house alone with my child who had reacted to what had been said and a massive incident occurred and went on for hours . Still no help from anyone though as the professional decided it was too unsafe for them to continue to visit but from what they saw we have safety plan in place and are managing.

We couldn’t continue anymore, I made the heartbreaking decision to ask for my child to be accommodated elsewhere as the risk to my other children and myself was so high, we had physical and emotional wounds yet as this was my child and not a partner, nobody appeared to care, nobody appeared to understand the seriousness of this nobody had heard of child to parent abuse and nobody wanted to help. In response to my desperation of this is not what we want but without help I fear they will kill me or their sibling, I was threatened with abandonment prosecution instead…. I couldn’t believe that nobody was taking this seriously not even for the others in the home or even my child who was doing this.

This continued for a further 8 months until one day things escalated again and my child had to be removed from our home. It broke me, it broke them and it broke our family, we will one day recover from this level of trauma, but this should never have got to this point, the system did not just fail but encouraged the abuse to continue. If you re read back part of our life and change my child to my partner – we would have been seen, heard and supported years earlier and perhaps the things which happened would never had done.

Things are so much more settled and happier for us all now, our family works in a way that is safest for us all, we have moved on and I found PEGS. If someone tells you they are scared of their child, please please listen to them and believe them. Child to parent abuse happens, I never knew it was possible until it happened to me, it could happen to you or someone you know. Learn from the failings we had, so that others have a different outcome to ours.

PEGS Service Shout Out - Dewis Choice

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Wed, 17 Jul 2024 13:02:18 GMT

Our next service shout is for an organisation that is doing incredible work in highlighting the abuse of older people whilst also delivering much-needed specialist support. PEGS is privileged to know this fantastic team and we will continue to champion them wherever we go.

Dewis Choice is a groundbreaking initiative in the UK. Founded in 2015, the project operates under the Centre for Age, Gender, and Social Justice at Aberystwyth University, aiming to fill a critical gap in services for older abuse survivors.

With the unique approach of combining direct support services with robust research efforts, they offer tailored assistance to older victims, including men, women, and non-binary individuals, ensuring their needs are met comprehensively. The initiative has supported hundreds of older individuals and their families with long-term intensive care, often described as life-saving by its beneficiaries.

The project's research component is equally significant, conducting studies to understand the experiences of older abuse victims better. These studies have revealed critical insights into the challenges faced by older individuals, such as the re-traumatising effects of social isolation during the COVID-19 pandemic. By documenting these experiences, Dewis Choice is influencing policy and improving service provision on a national scale.

The organisation is expanding its efforts to develop new training, e-resources, and toolkits. These resources aim to enhance the capacity of the voluntary and care sectors to detect and address domestic abuse among older populations effectively. Without resources and upskilling professionals, so many older people will go unseen, unprotected and remain at risk of serious harm.

Dewis Choice is pioneering a path to justice and support for older victims, ensuring they receive the care and recognition they deserve.

For more information on Dewis Choice and their work, visit Dewis Choice . Don’t forget to let them know PEGS sent you!

PEGS Child To Parent Abuse International Conference

Fri, 21 Jun 2024 09:06:34 GMT

PEGS host an International Child to Parent Abuse Virtual Conference: A Crucial Gathering for Change

On October 14th 2024, (on Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day) PEGS will host an International Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) Conference, a virtual event bringing together professionals from around the globe.

This conference is a pivotal platform for engaging sessions with both UK and international experts sharing the latest research, policies, and best practices in addressing CPA. Attendees will benefit from a lineup of distinguished speakers, including academics, front facing practitioners, Judges, and policymakers alongside various organisations such as Family lives, The Sharan Project, Hourglass the NHS and Refuge.

Key topics include current CPA trends, innovative support strategies for parents and guardians, and insights from those directly supporting parents, carers and guardians. This is an unparalleled opportunity for researchers, decision-makers, and campaigners to collaborate and amplify the voices of those affected by CPA.

The conference aims to foster a collaborative environment where stakeholders can share knowledge and strategies to better support those impacted by CPA. This gathering marks a significant step towards global awareness and actionable solutions.

Be part of the change by attending this groundbreaking event. Your participation will contribute to a collective effort to address and mitigate the impacts of Child to Parent Abuse.

For more information and to purchase tickets, which are discounted until the end of June, visit PEGS Events .

Mens Mental Health Week

Thu, 13 Jun 2024 09:08:21 GMT

Men's Mental Health Week, observed every June, is a crucial time to shine a light on the often-overlooked issues surrounding men's mental health. Despite increasing awareness, many men still struggle in silence due to societal expectations and stigma. This week offers an opportunity to break that silence, foster open conversations, and promote mental well-being among men.

Men are frequently conditioned to embody strength, stoicism, and self-reliance. While these traits can be positive, they often discourage men from seeking help when they face mental health challenges. Statistics reveal a stark reality: men are less likely to receive mental health treatment compared to women, yet they are more likely to die by suicide. This paradox highlights the urgent need to address the barriers preventing men from accessing the support they need.

One of the most significant barriers is the stigma surrounding mental health. Many men fear being perceived as weak or vulnerable if they admit to experiencing mental health issues. To combat this, it's essential to create environments—whether at home, work, or in social circles—where men feel safe to express their feelings without judgment.

Open dialogue is a powerful tool in mental health advocacy. Encouraging men to talk about their experiences can help demystify mental health issues and demonstrate that it’s okay to seek help. Whether through support groups, therapy, or casual conversations with friends and family, sharing stories can foster understanding and empathy.

Practical Steps for Men’s Mental Health

Reach Out : If you're struggling, don't hesitate to talk to someone you trust. Professional help is also invaluable—therapists, counsellors, and hotlines are there to support you.

Stay Connected : Maintain strong social connections. Friends, family, and community groups can provide a support network that helps buffer against stress.

Healthy Lifestyle : Regular exercise, a balanced diet, and adequate sleep can significantly impact mental health. Physical well-being is closely linked to mental well-being.

Mindfulness and Relaxation : Techniques such as meditation, yoga, or even simple breathing exercises can reduce stress and improve overall mental health.

Educate Yourself and Others : Understanding mental health can reduce stigma and promote more supportive environments. Share resources and information to spread awareness.

Men's Mental Health Week is more than just an observance—it's a call to action. By addressing the unique challenges men face and promoting open, stigma-free conversations, we can make strides in mental health awareness and support. Let's use this week to break the silence and build a world where all men feel empowered to take care of their mental well-being.

You can download our resource with further details of support organisations

PEGS celebrates Family Rights Group

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Tue, 11 Jun 2024 09:12:34 GMT

This month we are celebrating Family Rights Group (FRG). PEGS often suggests FRG for those we support, especially when questions surrounding certain legislation is asked of us. Having a service and resource such as FRG is invaluable to those experiencing child to parent abuse and who have children services involvement. Often those PEGS supports have financial barriers in accessing legal advice, so with Family Rights Group being able to offer this guidance free of charge ensures that no matter someone’s income, there is a safe space they can access the legal help they require.

Family Rights Group is a vital UK charity dedicated to supporting families involved with children’s services. Their mission is to ensure children are safe within their families and to strengthen the networks around them. They advocate for the rights of parents, grandparents, relatives, and friends, ensuring they receive fair treatment and support.

Key services

FRG offers free, independent, and confidential advice to families. Their services help parents, kinship carers, and other relatives understand their rights and options when dealing with social workers and the courts. The advice line is accessible via phone or email, providing critical guidance in navigating complex child welfare processes.
Family Group Conferences (FGC). FGCs are meetings that bring together family and friends to create a plan for a child's welfare. FRG promotes this approach to ensure that families have a say in the decisions affecting their children’s lives. They also provide training and support for local authorities to implement FGCs effectively.
Kinship and support. FRG champions kinship care, advocating for children who cannot live with their parents to be cared for by relatives or friends. They provide legal and practical advice to kinship carers and campaign for better recognition and support for these caregivers.
Campaigns and Policy work. FRG actively campaigns to influence child welfare policies. They work to ensure that the voices of families are heard in policy-making processes, striving for reforms that benefit children and their families. Their campaigns focus on issues like kinship care, domestic abuse, and legal aid reform.

Family Rights Group plays an indispensable role in supporting families and advocating for children’s welfare in the UK. Their comprehensive services and proactive campaigns ensure that families are informed, supported, and empowered to navigate the child welfare system. Fabulous work from the FRG team !

For more information or to get involved, visit Family Rights Group .

Why PEGS is an online service provider

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Tue, 04 Jun 2024 11:46:43 GMT

PEGS first started their services in March 2020, the day the UK went into lockdown in fact , so our

support has always been provided via online platforms and phone calls. There are various reasons

why we remain online, one of the biggest is that those we support have identified that this is their

preferred method of support. A lot of parents and caregivers are unable to leave their homes to

access support , being online means that they can still receive support from us. It is also one of the

safest way to provide that support to those experiencing child to parent abuse, not only for the

parent or caregiver but for the PEGS practitioner team too. Our Founding Director has said she is

unwilling to place any of the team at any risk of harm and often the most riskiest time for parents is

when a professional has attended the home, it important that this is also taken into account to

ensure the safety of those living in a home where child to parent abuse is occurring.

With the PEGS head office in Shropshire and team members in Derbyshire and Manchester it would

be incredibly difficult to provide face to face support to parents who live out of these areas, but we

still find those in those areas wanting us to provide telephone or virtual video calls for support. By

being online means that parents have more flexibility in accessing us, they choose the time that

works for them and we always ensure that the person accessing support is in a safe and confidential

space.

Being a online based service has not impacted our ability to reach those who need us, we have

supported in excess of 5000 parents, carers and guardians since we started , neither has it stopped

us delivering training , providing consultancy or creating a national covenant for employers.

With the demand for our service increasing by the day and with a limited practitioner team we had

to find a way to provide support, we initially started with a weekly practitioner led session, this

session quickly grew and we now run a session every weekday so that parents and caregivers have

various opportunities to speak to someone. If we provided face to face these sessions would not be

as accessible or as successful.

As with everything there are pros and cons, for us, the positives far outweigh the negatives and with

parents specifically expressing this is their preferred way to access us, we will continue with this

framework of support.

To find out how to access support or to attend our daily practitioner led sessions, you can complete

a referral form or contact the team at hello@pegsupport.com

PEGS celebrates Brightstar Boxing

Tue, 21 May 2024 09:10:13 GMT

At PEGS one of our most favourite things to do is to champion other organisations who are doing incredible work and to celebrate their achievements. After all, the only way we will have a happier safer community is if our communities work together.

Brightstar boxing is one of the organisations that PEGS is proud to be championing, based in Shifnal, Shropshire, with hubs in Wolverhampton, Hereford, Walsall, Shrewsbury, Birmingham and Stoke and led by Founding Director Joe Lockley, this amazing team are leading the way across the West Midlands and further afield in changing the way young people see, think about and believe in themselves.

Brightstar is more than a boxing club, it is a place that encourages acceptance, inclusion, empowerment, connections and creates a sense of belonging for all those who need them through their three-pronged approach of community, boxing and education.

Last Friday Founding Director Michelle and Corporate trainer Emma attended Brightstar’s 2024 celebration evening, where they caught up with the Brightstar family, had the opportunity to watch Flexus Dance Collective perform a dance show highlighting the issues that young people can face and how Brightstar helped them to overcome difficulties and encouraged them to thrive. PEGS Director said how ‘The dance was powerful and brought home how dance is so much more than movement, telling stories and experiences in a way that had everyone captivated’.

The event was attended by various organisations, supporters of Brightstar and of course some of the young people who attend, with two very heartfelt talks from two of the young members on how the support they have received has ‘changed their lives’. The whole room was touched by the honesty, rawness and passion from these lads who now also help others on their journeys too.

The event provided an opportunity to hear from a social worker, a teacher and a parent, all of whom gave their personal experience of the club and the impact this had on them, those they support and the wider community

Joe spoke about the community connection and the need to support each other; he shared his experiences with those who have supported him and the wider Brightstar team and Joe invited The High Sheriff of Shropshire to present awards to those who have supported him.

The evening was not over, not only had everyone been entertained from the start by Tony Soul who has an incredible voice, who had such energy and got the crowd singing and bopping along, we also were also privileged to witness another Brightstar star, Ethan who showed talents when he took over on the decks.

Brightstar has such a special place in PEGS teams hearts, we have seen first hand the unbelieve care, support and empowerment they provide to young people (and others!) The world is certainly a kinder place because of them and they bring so much hope to our present and future generations, we are privileged to be able to refer into Brightstar, but to quote a young person from the event ‘The question isn’t what Brightstar has done for me, but what can Brightstar do for you?’

You can find out more about Brightstar at https://www.brightstarboxing.co.uk/

Grandparents can be abused too

Fri, 03 May 2024 09:51:31 GMT

'Oh, we love having the grandchildren, especially because we can give them back!'

How many times have you heard that?

But have you heard 'We dread our grandchild coming to visit, we never feel safe until they've gone home'?

Child to Parent Abuse is increasingly a topic of research but there is currently no formal definition and, if the consultation carried out by the Home Office in 2023 results in one, it's likely that grandparents won't get a mention in the main title.

Of course, the age of grandparents can vary hugely but for those in the older age groups abuse from a child can be hard to understand and even harder to speak about. Whilst in many cases abusive behaviours are not linked to a health or mental health issue, some of the diagnoses involved in some cases of child to parent abuse weren't known until fairly recent times – ADHD was first recognised when mentioned in a National Institution of Clinical Excellence (NICE) report in 2000! Children who we now categorise as being victims of abuse and trauma were often just seen as 'naughty' back in the day and their behaviour needed to be dealt with by punishment. It's essential that we now recognise when children are asking for help – even if that is demonstrated by negative behaviours – but the impact of these behaviours on the whole family needs to be considered.

Information Now say that In the past two generations, the number of children being cared for by their grandparents has increased substantially from 33% to 82% - almost two-thirds of all grandparents regularly look after their grandchildren. The UK Government add that 41% of mothers are working full time so it's clear that grandparents are spending more time with their grandchildren than ever before. There are myriad reasons for this including the changing demographics of an ageing population where many grandparents are now more physically active so spending time with grandparents can be more fulfilling than in the past (anyone else remember sitting in silence listening to the adults talk and drink team and hoping it would be time to go home soon?)

But for all those positives, abuse of older people is a negative that's featuring more and more in research and in the news. Whilst several studies on both domestic abuse and elder abuse victimisation have reported that adult sons or grandsons, and a smaller proportion of adult daughters or granddaughters, are perpetrators in around half of all abuse against older adults (see Bows et al . 2022), there is little research into abuse by grandchildren who are aged under 18. One reason for this is likely to be the reluctance, by family members, professionals and society as a whole, to label children as 'perpetrators' or 'abusers

Parents experiencing abuse from children have told PEGS that the abuse most commonly starts before the age of six and often continues post the child turning 18. It is probable that some children who display abusive behaviours towards parents will also abuse their grandparents but it's possible that some children abuse grandparents only. What is pretty much definite is that grandparents will feel the same emotions as parents if a child is abusing them – shame, guilt, worry about consequences of speaking out and concerned about causing problems within the family, especially if they appear to be the only targets of the abuse. It's also common to look for a reason for the abuse, something that has happened to the child perhaps or something that the grandparent has/hasn't done and to try to rationalise the abuse.

As well as more research, there needs to be more recognition from organisations working with older people – statutory and voluntary – that Child to Parent Abuse can and does include children abusing grandparents and those grandparents need support. Abuse from a child is often no less dangerous than abuse from an adult so it shouldn't be laughed off or seen as grandparents not having enough 'control' over their grandchildren. More awareness of the issue, more open discussions and acknowledgement of the impact of this type of abuse will hopefully lead to appropriate support for grandparents who come forward to ask for help, and more of them doing so.

Amanda Warburton-Wynn is an independent researcher and consultant specialising in support for domestic abuse and sexual violence survivors with disabilities and older people. You can find out more about Amanda and her work on her website www.awdaconsultancy.com

Promotions and a New Director for PEGS

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Fri, 12 Apr 2024 08:06:44 GMT

Promotions and a new director for PEGS

PEGS is absolutely thrilled to share the wonderful news of promotions and a new Director who joins the PEGS team.

Chloe steps into her post today as admin manager and will be leading the admin team with all thing’s referral, workshops and PEGS enquiry related. Chloe will also be joining Michelle our Founding Director and Sophia our Lead practitioner, at events online and in person – so do introduce yourselves if you see her about.

Chloe has been with PEGS for almost a year and has previously spent her time responding to referrals and requests for support from parents and professionals. Chloe has excelled in her role and we are delighted to see her move into a managerial position.

Sophia celebrated her first year with PEGS earlier this month and has been in her new role as lead practitioner since the start of the year. Sophia is leading the practitioner team, supporting them with delivering our various services, workshops and programmes. Sophia also supports the team with their emotional wellbeing and still manages her own case load. You will find Sophia out and about at events, conferences and talks on behalf of PEGS and she would love to meet you, so do say hello if you see her.

Finally, Emma Thomas joins the Director team. Emma is not new to PEGS; she has been actively involved as our finance manager since 2021 and having Emma join us as a director has been a natural progression and one, we are excited about.

Emma brings with her a wealth of experience working within finance in multiple sectors and sizes of organisation. She believes in a straightforward approach to finance, ensuring that all stakeholders are clear on the financial position of their organisation.

Congratulations to Chloe, Sophia and Emma.

PEGS Turns 4

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Fri, 22 Mar 2024 09:54:31 GMT

PEGS turns 4

4 Years on

As I sit down this morning to reflect on the past four years of PEGS, the highs, lows, learnings and successes plus everything in between. One thing is clear, child to parent abuse (CPA) is becoming more known, there are more support services out there now than when I once need that help and change is finally starting to happen. However, there is still so much more to do, both locally, regionally, nationally and internationally.

When I first started PEGS, I honestly had no idea what it would look like, I was just determined to make change for those experiencing child to parent abuse. I don’t talk about my experiences publicly as PEGS was not and is not about me or my journey, but those experiences have helped to reach those who are or have been in similar situations to where I once was. For me, it was one of the most

heartbreaking, worrying and unsafe times and add in to that professional blame, no support and having your voice silenced, it really was an isolating time and I have incredible support around me personally but that still did not take away the aloneness I felt.

It was after a situation where I found myself yet again having to actively encourage professionals to listen, that I thought, if I with my background and knowledge (my previous roles were in the domestic abuse and family law sectors) could not be heard, find appropriate and effective support, well what about Joe Bloggs on the street who may not have the same knowledge or even feel confident enough to advocate for themselves and their family to professionals and services, what hope did these families have.

That evening in July 2019, I decided that things needed to change, change can start with anyone of us at any one time, so why not me and why not then. One thing I did learn very quicky during my experiences was that if a child says no to a referral or they do not want to work with that service or professional then more often than not, those services were withdrawn, leaving parents even further isolated and at risk. I researched services across the UK and found not one service specifically on child to parent abuse and no service that could provide support solely for parents on CPA. This was a huge gap in services and so many missed opportunities to help families, so I created a google document and asked for parents, carers and guardians for their views, for what they wanted, I focused just on them, not their child, because for me this was an element that was just simply missing. (This is not saying those who display abusive behaviours do not need support just that PEGS is not that service for providing that help). The response to that initial survey was overwhelming, and

I am so grateful to those who took part in that anonymous document as they are the reason PEGS is run the way it is. A lot of their responses mirrored my experiences, which was incredibly sad but if all of us were having similar responses or no response to our situations then the solution or part of it, for me, was to create something to help bridge that. Seems logical right, yet for years nobody had considered it, PEGS continually asks those we support on feedback on our services, what services or support they feel they need, what that looks like – firmly placing them at the centre and giving them a voice, they have been voiceless for far too long.

I also wanted to make PEGS a free service, finances should never be a barrier for accessing support and for me, charging victims of abuse is just not okay, even if someone is in a position on paper to pay for services, this does not mean that they can, what about those who are being financially abused and controlled? Where did this potentially leave them? or with the cost of living added into things, would charging see parents having to make a decision between eating, heating and having support to help them keep safe? PEGS services will always remain free to those who need us, of course as a community interest company, this meant that PEGS would need to apply for grants, encourage donations and an income via other means, so with that in mind, consultancy, key note speaking, training and a risk awareness model was developed.

Alongside the parental support I also asked professionals, organisations and services what did they need, after all if professionals were not upskilled, frameworks, protocols or policies introduced then we were only working with part of a circle and barriers would remain. It is vital that we support professionals in all of this work too. I took to talking to anyone and everyone who would listen, from government level down, I met with some fantastic people who remain connected and who are a huge support for me and PEGS today.

During the past four years we have met so many incredible individuals who are also championing our work, we have become trusted partners of NHS Safeguarding for England (shout out to the brilliant Kenny Gibson and his team), created a free employer covenant that is backed by the Dept for Work and Pensions (massive thanks to Tony, Ahmed and the National Partner team for all their help on the CPAC)

PEGS has successfully supported the implementation of training, protocols and policy across organisations, local areas and whole regions, one region for us who is paving the way as a leading example on responding to child to parent abuse is Mid and West Wales. Through the work we have done with partner agencies and those with lived experience, this whole region of 4 local authorities, 2 health boards, various organisations, services and a police force have a protocol in responding to child to parent abuse, our PRAM model is also operational as part of the response. Without the support and commitment from Nat Handcock and her team and Dafydd Llewelyn, The Police Crime Commissioner for Dyfed Powys this would never have been achieved.

PEGS has now grown to a team of 11 plus our external services who support us with our website and finances, they too are part of us and we are so lucky to have these people on the wider PEGS team (huge thanks to Leon and the ISEV team, Zomma bookkeeping, Clair and all at TCALLP) and of course our incredible board members who provide myself and the PEGS team with advice, guidance, support, expertise and who are also our critical friends when needed, we truly are so privileged to know and work alongside them.

I never thought those 4 years ago that PEGS would be where we are, looking back over these short but powerful years, brings so much joy, growth gratitude, learning and also at times sadness. PEGS has now supported in excess of 5000 parents, carers and guardians and have on average 300 referrals a month, one of our biggest challenges is capacity v demand. We have pivoted, introduced new services, reduced media presence, but this level of request for support only keeps growing we have referrals from across the UK and internationally now too, just showing how little support is available.

We were asked to consult on the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 on CPA and all our input made It into the statutory guidance. We then launched a child to parent abuse awareness day on October 14 th 2022 and this day has now been adopted in other countries helping them to highlight this form of abuse. We have presented at various meetings and conferences across the UK and internationally. We have held our own events too encouraging anyone and everyone to get involved. We have campaigned, championed others in our sector and appropriately challenged poor or lack of responses where needed.

Whilst CPA is so much further along than even four years ago, we are still hearing the lines ‘lessons have been learned’ yet the same “lesson” is still being re learned, so are these lessons truly being learned? Parents, carers and guardians are still being blamed, ignored and silenced and for some, sadly they have lost their lives, lives that could have been saved, lives that matter, lives of people who are living in plain sight of our communities but go hidden because the person who is abusing them is their child (or grandchild). CPA is from my view probably where domestic abuse was in the 60s/70s. We need to work together to be making changes, to be including child to parent abuse in forums, meetings, polices, we need to be placing parents, carers and guardians at the centre as well, this is not saying that they matter more but that they matter too – and they do.

I was and remain determined to bring child to parent abuse out of the shadows to highlight those who are experiencing CPA, and whilst I recognise my achievements in doing this, these are not mine alone – without the support, championing and help along the way from others I know PEGS would not be where we are – To our team, you are part of the change needed, you are doing the do and I am so so proud of you, thank you for believing in me , my vision and for pushing for change for those who need us. You make PEGS what it is, you are all part of our jigsaw, equally important and equally fantastic! Our parents, carers and guardians are in safer and better places because of the work you do.

For those who have been part of our journey in some way and have continued to support and raise PEGS work at every opportunity – there are far too many to mention, but just know I see you and I appreciate all that you have done for me personally and professionally

Personally, I wish there was no need for PEGS, that CPA did not occur, but that is simply not the reality. So as long as parents, carers and guardians need us, missed opportunities keep happening and the same lessons keep being re-learned, we will be here, pushing for change, lending our voices to those who need a voice, for those who are not allowed a voice and for those are sadly no longer

here to have a voice.

To anyone who is reading this, if it resonates with you, just know you are not alone, we see you. You do matter and PEGS and I have always got you.

All my love,

Michelle xxx

International Women's Day 2024

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Fri, 08 Mar 2024 11:02:48 GMT

International Women's Day 2024

The theme for this year’s international women’s day is inspire and inclusion. At PEGS we are so privileged to know and work alongside some incredible women who are doing equally incredible things. To celebrate our connections, their work and who inspire us, we wanted to dedicate this blog to them. A message from PEGS Found Director “Thank you for being the woman you are, for using your voice to help those in need, for being part of the change women need. Thank you for inspiring me, for including me in your world, for helping me grow and to be a better leader and women. I am privileged and thankful to know you, to work alongside you and I will always be one of your biggest cheerleaders “

Carrie Bower – Domestic Abuse lead at Age UK https://www.ageuk.org.uk/discover/2023/december/what-we-know-now-about-older-victims-of-domestic-abuse/ and Know your place https://carrievftraining.co.uk/

Prashansha Sharma - https://www.theheartbreakhealer.co.uk/

Dipti Solanki https://diptisolanki.com/grief-coaching/

Viran Wiltshire - Specialist Crime Review Officer – Metropolitan Police

Tabitha Ross Brown -CEO Parent Real Talk https://www.parentrealtalk.com/copy-of-who-we-are

Medina Johnson – Chief Executive IrisI https://irisi.org/

Lucy Wade - https://ydom.co.uk/ and https://ydom.co.uk/podcasts/

Gemma Roberts – Safenet https://safenet.org.uk/ and Director at the FlyAnyway Foundation https://www.iamthequeenbee.co.uk/flyanyway

Natalie Handcock – Mid and West Wales VAWGSV Regional Advisor https://cysur.wales/

Michelle Whelan – Chief Executive Calan DVS https://www.calandvs.org.uk/en/

Polly Harrar – Sharan Project https://sharan.org.uk/about-us/ EDAC https://edacuk.org/

Amanda Warburton -Wynn - https://awdaconsultancy.com/

Dr Beverly Gilbert – Senior Lecturer domestic/ sexual violence and criminology https://www.worcester.ac.uk/about/profiles/beverley-gilbert

Elize Freeman and the team at Dewis Choice https://dewischoice.org.uk/about-us/research-team/

Rebecca Leche CEO of TOU - https://thinkingofu.app/

Emma Pickering – Head of technology – facilitated abuse and Economic empowerment at Refuge https://refuge.org.uk/

Our fabulous PEGS team could not be missed off this – Directors Elaine Higgins and Emma Thomas, and the team doing the do - Ellie, Sophia, Emma, Sharon, Chloe B, Chole E, Tasha, Dani

Our Advisory Board – Dr Amanda Holt, Thien – Trang Nguyen Phan, Caroline Caesar - Caston, Vickie Crompton, Shani Wright, Lucy Giles. Becky Weaver, Julie Mackay

Please do check out these amazing women who are doing amazing things, let them know PEGS sent you!

Report on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) and the impact to those with sight and hearing loss.

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Tue, 05 Mar 2024 10:35:18 GMT

PEGS has released a report on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) and the impact to those with sight and hearing loss.

The anonymous survey was funded by the Vision Foundation with the aim to gain an understanding in how many parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, have vision or hearing impairments and who are unable to access support services.

There has been a rise in awareness of child to parent abuse over recent years, however there is still a long way to go, these surveys and reports help to shine a light on something that is still often overlooked or not accepted as a form of abuse. The PEGS team have supported in excess of 5000 parents, carers and guardians since March 2020 and are seeing around 300 requests for support each month.

The report, which you can download below, shows the types of abuse being experienced in households where CPA is occurring, its impact on parents, siblings and the wider community, the dynamics of households and the level of professional support people feel they are receiving.

PEGS Report

This survey revealed that 1 parent in every 23 has sight loss and 1 in every 28 has hearing loss. There needs to be more work done to provide awareness, support and increase understanding of the challenges these parents face when trying to access help.

For the third year running it was idenfited that women were more likely to experience abusive behaviours from their child with almost 100% of parents who completed the survey idenfited as female.

With 80% of parents being between 36 – 55 years in age and the dynamics of the household saw over ¾ were genetic parents.

We saw a 5 % increase in parents experiencing abuse from their child sharing how they first noticed the abusive behaviours starting when the child was aged 5 years old and over half of the children displaying abusive behaviours are male. CPA can occur regardless of the child’s age, both minor aged and adult aged offspring have been identified as showing abusive behaviours.

In order to understand the reality of experiencing abusive behaviours from a child and the challenges parents face, we asked parents to share the forms of abuse they are subjected to. 5% of parents had been experiencing child to parent abuse for over a decade.

CPA can be in many forms, such as physical, emotional. Coercive and controlling, economic and financial, digital, harassment and stalking, and even sexual abuse too

Almost a quarter of all parents are being physically harmed daily, an increase from 2023 and over ¾ are experiencing threatening, intimidation and controlling behaviours towards them.

The impact to families and also communities was explored with over 75% of parents saying their child shows abusive behaviours outside of the home. 50% of Siblings are being physically harmed a and 4% of parents had shared how the family pet had been killed by their child. This is a 3% increase from 2023.

Sadly 64% of parents have had contacted stopped by family or friends due to the behaviour of their child, further increasing the risk and isolation of families, 94% of parents reported feeling isolated or alone and for 97% of parents, they have had to completely change their routines or lifestyles

Parents have been asking for help from various professionals and sectors, with an overwhelming 93% of parents saying they would approach education settings when they started to see behaviour beyond that of what would be seen as ‘typical’. With CAMHS and the G.P being approached by over ¾ of parents. It was also highlighted that 80% of parents had thought about asking for support from a professional but changed their minds – 50% thought professionals wouldn’t understand and 50% didn’t want their child to have a criminal record. 45% of parents said that when they had asked for support previously, that professionals had not been helpful.

The report shows that there is so much more services, communities and societies need to be doing to support those impacted by child to parent abuse. Without awareness, training and specialist support families will continue to be unseen and unheard and ultimately someone will lose their life

PEGS released a report into Child to Parent Abuse and school holidays in the latter part of 2023, you can read that report here: https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/pegs-releases-report-into-child-to-parent-abuse-and-the-impact-during-the-school-holidays

PEGS - CPA Heroes 2023

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Fri, 16 Feb 2024 10:15:04 GMT

CPA Hero winners announced

PEGS is delighted to be able to share the winners of our 2023 CPA Hero award.

Police officers, family support worker, MARAC co-ordinator, social workers and friends and family of parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing child to parent abuse were all nominated for an award.

CPA Heroes was first launched in 2022 with the aim to celebrate and recognise those individuals who are going above and beyond to provide support and a difference to those impacted by child to parent abuse (CPA). Child to parent abuse is believed to affect upwards of 3% of the UK population but remains a much-hidden form of abuse.

This year the PEGS team introduced an international award to include those who are supporting parents, carers and guardians or who are raising awareness of child to parent abuse outside of the UK.

Nominations were revealed a the end of 2023 with the winners being announced early 2024, the winners for the UK were, a friend of a parent experiencing child to parent abuse and Helen Canning, a family support worker from Vale Family First in Vale of Glamorgan. For the international award Tabatha Ross Brown, CEO of Parent Real Talk won the award.

Founding Director Michelle John said “It was such a tough decision for the judging team, seeing the nominations come through and hearing about the difference those people made for parents, carers and guardians during some of the most difficult and heartbreak situations is the reason why CPA Hero exists. It is important we shine a light on child to parent abuse but it is equally important we shine a light on those who are making an impact to those experiencing CPA, who are raising awareness and who are pushing for change.

A huge congratulations to all nominees and winners”.

The parent who nominated the family support worker said that

“Helen never gave up with me, continued to see me weekly providing much needed advice, support and just someone to listen to me on a weekly basis. I had many a dark week and seeing Helen always helped me to see the light at the end of the tunnel. She is a fantastic support worker and a credit to her team. She really is a wonderful human and she deserves an award to recognise this.”

Tabatha’s nomination read

“Tabatha is simply incredible, she has single handedly created an organisation for parents, campaigned to have CPA recognised by her state, stood up and spoke out for those who do not have a voice and she continues to push for change so that parents in America are seen, heard and supported. Tabatha’s drive, enthusiasm and passion for helping those experiencing this form of abuse is inspiring, her work is more than just work, it is changing the lives of parents in Michigan and further afield. Tabatha is part of the solution those impacted by CPA need”. Tabatha said she was honoured, excited and grateful to have won the award

You can find out more about the organisations mentioned at

https://www.valeofglamorgan.gov.uk/en/living/social_care/children_and_young_people/families_first/Families-First.aspx

https://www.parentrealtalk.com/copy-of-who-we-are

PEGS' 2023 Recap

Wed, 24 Jan 2024 13:58:25 GMT

PEGS' 2023 Recap

As we move into 2024, let’s reflect on 2023; it's with both pride and gratitude that we look back on a year filled with achievements, growth and meaningful connections at PEGS. From awards and promotions to impactful radio appearances and expanded training initiatives, our journey over the past 12 months has been nothing short of impactful.

One of the highlights of the year has been the heartening feedback from numerous parents who have shared their experience with PEGS on their CPA (Child to Parent Abuse) journey. We are honoured to have made a positive impact on these parents, guardians & carers, reaffirming our commitment to providing essential resources and support for those experiencing CPA.

Our founding director Michelle John, took centre stage multiple times in 2023 on both the radio and at seminars this year, passionately raising awareness about Child to Parent Abuse and reassuring parents that they are not alone. Through these broadcasts, we've strived to break the silence surrounding this issue and foster a sense of community among those facing similar challenges.

The Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) was launched in 2021, with the backing of the Department for Work and Pensions, due to 70% of parents at that time telling us how their work had been impacted because of the abuse from their child. Celebrating 2 years of CPAC, we wanted to highlight employers who have or were about to sign up to the covenant and to encourage further employer commitment whilst raising awareness to child to parent abuse. This was a very successful event and a true highlight for last year.

The year 2 023 brought not just recognition but also growth, both externally and internally. PEGS and our dedicated staff received nominations and won awards, a testament to the unwavering dedication and excellence exhibited throughout the year. This growth has allowed us to extend our reach and assist even more parents, with new members joining the PEGS family and two well-deserved internal promotions—congratulations, Ellie & Sophia!

In response to the increasing demand for knowledge and support, we introduced more workshops, providing valuable information and training to parents and professionals. Our goal is to equip our community with the tools they need to recognise Child to Parent Abuse and spread awareness.

As we set our sights on 2024, the horizon looks promising for PEGS; we have new workshops coming, further expanding our offerings to further knowledge and understanding as well as the introduction of our online yoga sessions, promoting not only mental well-being but also offering a unique way for our community to connect. Starting in February, our new Walk & Talk sessions will provide an opportunity for PEGS Parents to engage in meaningful conversations with our practitioners while enjoying the benefits of physical activity and a safe space.

Our commitment to furthering support practices for parents and professionals remains unwavering. As we venture into the new year, we aspire to build on the successes of 2023, fostering growth and extending our reach to help even more individuals. With gratitude for the past and enthusiasm for the future, here's to a transformative 2024 at PEGS.

Interested in reading some of the articles PEGS featured in last year? You can find them here:

Shropshire enterprise finds a quarter of parents abused by own child say it started before age six

PEGS team attend Chamber of Commerce HR Forum

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Wed, 03 Jan 2024 10:19:18 GMT

PEGS team attend Chamber of Commerce HR Forum

At the end of last year, Founding Director Michelle and practitioner Sophia travelled to Bromsgrove to attend the HR Forum facilitated by Herefordshire and Worcestershire Chamber of Commerce sponsored by Hewett Recruitment | BCorp™.

Michelle gave an insightful talk on Child to Parent Abuse ( CPA ) and the impact on employment. Michelle shared the details of PEGS child to parent abuse covenant (CPAC), a Department for Work and Pensions backed employer’s convent that PEGS launched in October 2021 and how the covenant could help employers, HR professionals and those with a managerial role to support colleagues who are experiencing child to parent abuse. There were some thought-provoking questions around the prevalence of CPA and the visibility of CPA in society which Michelle had the opportunity to reply too.

Michelle and Sophia also heard a talk from Darryll Thomas, Partner at mfg Solicitors LLP on Subject Access requests and there was a opportunity to participate in a retention activity headed by Dawn Hardman, HR Director at the Chamber of Commerce.

PEGS has been part of the Chamber since 2021 and they have provided support, guidance, training and events which we are thankful to be part of. You can find out more about the Chamber here https://hwchamber.co.uk/

We would like to thank the Chamber of Commerce for asking us along and extend our thanks to the whole team who were part of this event. PEGS looks forward to attending more events during 2024.

You can find out more about PEGS employer covenant by clicking on this link https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/CPAC

Changing the story locally

Tue, 12 Dec 2023 13:56:01 GMT

Changing the story locally.

On Friday 8th December PEGS hosted a virtual White Ribbon event for professionals alongside other organisations who provide Domestic Abuse services in Shropshire. The event set out to highlight the current service provision in Shropshire, providing a deeper insight into how and where to refer victims of domestic abuse for specialist support.

As the Founding Director of PEGS, Michelle John opened the event and spoke about the importance of working together collaboratively to change the story locally, before providing an overview of our current services in Shropshire and new offerings for 2024.

Kate Anniston and Helen Richardson from West Mercia Women's Aid also discussed the importance of partnership working locally and regionally. They explained their IDVA (Independent Domestic Abuse Advocate) services including their provisions for 13-19-year-olds, the prevention work they are carrying out, and their Inclusion IDVA who is working in various communities to help overcome the barriers some victims face in accessing support.

Andrea Williams joined us from Cranstoun and shared information on how they are working alongside perpetrators to improve the lives of victims and discussed their Men and Masculinities Programme. Again, the importance of having a collaborative and multi-agency approach to tackling domestic abuse was referred to.

Nicola Wilkinson from Shropshire Domestic Abuse Service (SDAS), shared how they are making it easier for people in rural areas to get the support they need and spoke about their single point of entry drop-in service. They gave an update on their safe accommodation and refuges that now include a space dedicated to accommodating women who are experiencing multiple disadvantages and explained about their children and young peoples service and peer support.

Wendy Bulman from Shropshire Council spoke not only of the statutory responsibilities of the local authority but also of the moral reasons to do more than that across Shropshire as part of making a difference to all victims, whilst also holding perpetrators to account. She referred to their recent Safer Streets Campaign and also stressed the importance of everyone working together to continue to change the story locally.

It was fantastic to be able to bring multiple services together in a shared online space, not only to provide professionals with an overview of service provision and referral pathways but to also harness the passion and determination that exists in the region to create lasting change for victims of domestic abuse.

You can access the recording of the virtual event here

Highlights from PEGS Conference

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Mon, 11 Dec 2023 09:30:03 GMT

Last month some of the team headed to Central London to host our Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) conference. The event saw delegates attend from across the UK, with key note speeches, a panel discussion, and even virtual input from an organisation in America too. It’s fair to say the team excelled themselves and delivered an interactive, informative and engaging event on Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) and the impact on employment.

The Child to Parent Abuse Covenant was launched in October 2021 due to our then survey, revealing that 70% of those PEGS supported had to significantly reduce or leave employment altogether due to the behaviours they were experiencing from their child. PEGS approached the Department for Work and pensions (DWP ) to highlight the barriers employees and employers were facing when experiencing Child to Parent Abuse. With Tony’s and Ahmed’s, National Partnership team support and encouragement, the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant was created and became the 4th DWP backed employer covenant available free of charge to any UK employer. You can find out more about the launch of the covenant and how to sign up here https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/pegs-launches-national-employer-covenant

PEGS would like to extend our thanks to Rax, Local events manager at Halifax Flagship branch in New Oxford Street, London, who allowed us to use their incredible venue for the conference. The onsite social enterprise Change please, supplied all the beverages for us, which was a brilliant opportunity for PEGS to be able to support another social enterprise. You can find out more about the venue and the wonderful work of Change please, here https://changeplease.org/

To find out more about the event itself, you can download the highlight report here :

16 Days of Activism - Day 11 - Family Lives

Tue, 05 Dec 2023 11:55:01 GMT

Family Lives was formed over 45 years ago by volunteers, with the aim of ensuring that all parents had somewhere to turn before they reached crisis point by providing a dedicated organisation to support parents.

We know that the right support at the right time makes all the difference. Family Lives provides targeted early intervention and crisis support to families who are struggling. We support families with a wide range of issues including children’s early development, challenging relationships and behaviour, and emotional and mental wellbeing.

We are a volunteer-led organisation with around 200 volunteers across our different services. We simply could not do what we do without them, alongside our dedicated team of staff. Many of our volunteers began their relationship with us as service users but have stayed to support others on their journey. This is a testament to the support they themselves received. We have many different volunteering opportunities available based both at home and in local communities.

Our crisis support, provided through our helpline, chat and email services, has always been at the heart of what we do. We also have long-standing programmes in the areas we work in across England, providing support to thousands of families through our befriending, outreach and home-visiting services.

Since our beginnings, Family Lives has supported families from the very first days of becoming a parent through to the teenage years and beyond. We are proud to offer support across the age range so that families can turn to us whenever they need us.

Over the last few years, we have seen an escalation in calls from family members relating to concerns about the levels of violence that children and young people are using against them. This has resulted in our call-handlers raising concerns about the significant risk to parents/carers and other family members, as well as to the children themselves. To explore this issue in more detail, we undertook a data review to examine the ways in which child aggression and violence manifests itself in the family home, and to identify some of the

underlying contexts that callers shared with us in our report Feeling Under Siege. You can read this report on our website.

We are committed to supporting families experiencing child to parent aggression and violence, and are proud to be working with amazing organisations such as PEGS to raise awareness of the increase of child to parent aggression and violence, and the support available.

16 Days of Activism - Day 10 - Cranstoun

Mon, 04 Dec 2023 12:52:27 GMT

A safe space and support for people who want to make changes to their abusive behaviours towards partners or family members, Shropshire Men and Masculinities Programme

What is the Men & Masculinities programme?

The Men & Masculinities programme is for those who are aware that their relationships have become distressing and damaged by their behaviour.

The programme will create a safe and supportive space to help explore what it means to be a man, a partner and a father. We will address the impact of conflict, anger and anxiety on relationships and help try to rebuild the lost trust.

The programme also offers a linked (ex-)partner support service upon referral.

What does the programme cover?

The programme focuses on behaviour, how we act, how this reinforces how we think and feel, and most importantly, how to act differently. It is also designed to support any other treatment you may be involved with.

The programme is a rolling programme that lasts up to 24 weeks across three core modules:

• Coercion

• Control

• Consequences

We look at how pressure builds inside of you, how to deal with conflict safely and how your experiences of masculinity have shaped the lens through which you see your relationships.

We will also try to help you come to terms with the worst of your experiences, how to break the link between the past and the present, and how to stop repeating the traumas at the heart of your behaviour.

We will explore what it means to be a respectful and supportive parent, whatever your relationship with your child or children may be. We will also explore how to rebuild trust in your life.

We will look at any issues around intimacy, closeness, sex and sexuality, including how to love generously, or how to let go.

Coming into treatment can be the first positive step towards making life better for you and the people you love.

Please get in touch with us if :

• You want to have stability?

• You want to feel confident?

• You want to put the past behind you?

• You want to make yourself proud?

• You know you can be a good dad?

• You know you can be a good partner?

• You want to be more self-reliant?

• You want to keep your promises?

Give Cranstoun a call on 01952 454 759 or email tw@cranstoun.org.uk , and take the first step to making it happen.

16 Days of Activism - Day 9 - IRISi

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 13:25:37 GMT

Improving healthcare responses to Domestic Abuse: IRISi's mission against Gender-Based Violence

Navigating 16 essential insights from our work: delving into IRISi's impact through IRIS and ADViSE Programmes in a special feature for PEGS' 16 Days campaign.

1) How has IRISi been improving the healthcare response to Gender-Based Violence?

IRISi , established in 2017, is a social enterprise dedicated to enhancing healthcare responses to gender-based violence (GBV). Collaborating with partners, we develop evidence-based interventions, and provide expert advice and consultancy in the field of Domestic Abuse (DA) tailored for different healthcare settings.

2) Understanding the scale: what is the impact of domestic abuse on health?

Domestic abuse affects 26% of women in their lifetime, escalating to 41% for those attending general practice (CSEW, 2016; Richardson et al., 2002). With devastating health impacts, the annual cost of domestic abuse to health is £1.7bn (Walby, 2009). We aim to address this by supporting the local commissioning, implementation and sustainability of our programmes, which are tailored according to the specific needs of each healthcare setting.

3) What is the IRIS Programme?

IRIS , our flagship intervention, operates in primary care and is a specialist training, support and referral programme for General Practices. Positively evaluated in a randomised controlled trial, it significantly improves the healthcare response to DA.

4) How does IRISi provide local support to expand the IRIS Programme?

We actively support the local commissioning and growth of the IRIS programme , providing bid development, training for trainers, ongoing support and national analysis. This collaborative is crucial not only in bringing this initiative to more areas, but also in developing innovative, evidence-based health interventions for those affected by GBV.

5) How does IRIS work?

IRIS is a collaboration between primary care and third-sector domestic abuse specialist services. The initiative focuses on providing ongoing training, education and consultancy for clinical and administrative staff. Core areas include care pathways for practitioners and an enhanced referral pathway to a named specialist in a local DA service for patients.

6) What is the role of the Advocate Educator (AE)?

Every general practice joining the IRIS programme is supported by a named Advocate Educator, who provides crucial support to both the practice and patients identified during consultations. This ensures a personalised and effective response to DA.

7) What type of support do survivors receive?

The IRIS programme is designed and based on a survivor-centred model. This framework ensures that every patient identified and referred to our programmes receives support through a comprehensive approach by the AE, making sure that they have assistance tailored to their individual needs.

8) What does IRIS bring to General Practices?

General practices benefit from in-house, specialist DA training, ongoing support, health promotion materials, and enhanced safeguarding responses. The programme streamlines the referral pathway for patients and reducing response time. All those who complete the IRIS training gain CPD points.

9) Does IRIS increase referrals from General Practices?

Our ongoing evidence indicates that the IRIS programme increases referrals from general practice for patients affected by DA. Sustained funding for IRIS programmes is crucial for maintaining these positive outcomes.

10) What are the outcomes of the IRIS Programme for funders and commissioners?

The IRIS programme is nationally recognised and evidence-based, providing a cost-effective intervention for Integrated Care Boards (ICBs) and other commissioning bodies. Its positive impact includes improving the safety, quality of life and well-being of survivors, who reportedly see their GP and other general practice clinicians less frequently after being identified and supported through the programme.

11) Is it worth investing in the IRIS Programme?

The first areas implemented IRIS in 2010. From that point onwards, many other studies have been conducted to show the amplitude of this intervention, which is now running across the UK in more than 50 localities. Produced in 2022, “ The social value of improving the primary care response to domestic violence and abuse: A mixed methods Social Return on Investment analysis of the IRIS programme ” is one of those studies and it concludes:

For each pound invested in the IRIS Programme, a monetary return of £16.79 is expected.
For each pound invested in the IRIS Programme, a social return of £10.71 was obtained.

12) Has IRIS been nationally endorsed?

In 2021, the UK implemented the Domestic Abuse Act to enshrine a a comprehensive response to DA in legislation. The accompanying Domestic Abuse Statutory Guidance, issued by the Home Office in July 2022, targeted both statutory and non-statutory bodies, and recommended : “Implementing the IRIS (Identification and Referral to Improve Safety) Programme. IRIS is an evidence-based intervention to improve the general practice response to domestic abuse through training, support to practice teams and having a DA specialist embedded in practices. It is nationally recognised as best practice and has informed NICE guidance.”

13) What is the ADVISE Programme?

The ADViSE programme extends the success of IRIS to sexual health clinics, supporting clinicians to identify and respond to patients affected by Domestic & Sexual Violence and Abuse (D&SVA). This evidence-based programme also ensures a simple referral pathway to a named specialist in a local frontline service.

14) How does ADViSE identify and support a wider range of patients?

Aligned with the demographic typically served by sexual health clinics, ADViSE also facilitates the identification of a more extensive and diverse range of patient groups, providing visibility and support for individuals from minority groups.

15) How does ADViSE work?

ADViSE supports staff in recognising and responding to patients affected by D&SVA, offering direct referrals to specialist services. As with IRIS, the programme also strengthens local networks, increases safety and boosts staff confidence in responding to D&SVA.

16) Why sexual health clinics?

Women affected by Domestic Abuse are three times more likely to face gynaecological and sexual health problems. ADViSE, which was piloted successfully in Bristol and East London, addresses this gap by training sexual health practitioners to identify, respond and refer effectively.

To find out more about our work, please visit www.irisi.org .

16 Days of Activism - Day 8 - AGE UK

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 13:09:51 GMT

At the beginning of last year’s 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, the ONS published the first data on victims of domestic abuse of all ages, having removed the upper age limit of 74 years. Sadly, this data showed that 1 in 30 people aged 60 to 74 and approximately 1 in 50 people aged 75+ have been subjected to domestic abuse in the previous year. We know with limited data this is likely to be an underrepresentation of the actual scale of the problem.

At Age UK, year on year, we are hearing from increasing numbers of older people telling us they are being subjected to domestic abuse.

Like younger people, for older people this may be physical, sexual, emotional, or economic, or a combination of all. Those who harm, will use a range of behaviours to exert power and control. But there are also some important age-related differences that specifically affect victim-survivors as they age.

For example, older people are just as likely to be abused by an adult child or grandchild as they are a spouse or partner. Many older people subjected to abuse have a health condition or disability, which may mean they rely on the person harming them, for care and support.

Older people may face several barriers to seeking and accessing support. This can be due to a range of factors, including a lack of awareness among health and social care professionals. Tools used by professionals to assess risk of domestic abuse are often aimed at younger women and intimate partner abuse, and don’t consider the specific risk factors affecting older people and adult-child to parent abuse.

Older people with disabilities, or those from LGBTQ+ and ethnic minority backgrounds, may face further barriers due to a lack of appropriate services, community barriers, discrimination, or a reliance on carers. And the cost of living crisis may leave older people more isolated and make it more difficult to leave where they share a home, with the person harming them.

Older mothers specifically may have internalised victim blaming language, feeling a sense of shame, wishing to protect their family members.

Age UK signposts to a range of specialist domestic abuse services including PEGS on their dedicated Age UK Domestic Abuse Page

Age UK has also joined Employers Initiative on Domestic Abuse (EIDA), a network of employers committed to supporting their employees who are or have been subjected to domestic abuse. At Age UK we have created a culture where employees are able to access domestic abuse awareness training, specialist information, and use their work equipment to empower them to find support safely. If our employees have increased awareness for themselves and each other, this will enable them to recognise the signs and support the older people Age UK is here for.

Our safeguarding team’s domestic abuse lead speaks at conferences and events, amplifying the voices of older victim-survivors of domestic abuse, ensuring that child to parent abuse is included in the conversation.

This work educates professionals who work with older people to recognise the subtle signs that an older person may be subjected to domestic abuse, and empowers them to confidently reach in and ask appropriate, sensitive questions.

Carrie Bower - Domestic Abuse Lead

16 Days of Activism - Day 7 - Sharon Livermore

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 12:53:55 GMT

Domestic Abuse Education was founded by Sharon Livermore, domestic abuse survivor. Since almost

losing her life in November 2015 Sharon has dedicated her career to raising awareness of domestic

abuse. Her work includes but is not limited to, setting up two businesses, co-creating “Sharon’s

Policy”, a domestic abuse policy, and guidance notes, available to download free of charge to

businesses nationwide; and most recently setting up a CPD training course which enables employees

to gain a CPD accreditation but most importantly provides employees with in-depth education on

domestic abuse and how the workplace can support. Did you know 75% of employees who

experience DA are targeted at the workplace by their abusive partner? The 16 Days of Activism and

White Ribbon Campaigns service as powerful tools for raising awareness about the prevalence and

consequence of gender-based violence. By participating in and promoting these initiatives, we can

educate employees, network, and partners about these critical issues which ultimately create a

greater understanding of the need for change. Through raising awareness and committing to better

understanding domestic abuse we can collectively lower shocking statistics, including the one above,

change lives and change the associated stigma and taboo that comes with domestic abuse. Domestic

Abuse Education seeks to help businesses understand that domestic abuse is very much a workplace

issue, once you understand this, the phrase “knowledge is power” really comes to life; once you’re

educated you won’t forget what you’re told, your perception of domestic abuse will be forever

altered, and you will feel empowered to support current, past, or future victims in your workplace.

The depth of support you provide is ultimately down to you, for men, the White Ribbon Promise is a

great start. For everyone, irrespective of gender, a Domestic Abuse Policy you understand and the

confidence to signpost are two simple yet life-changing actions every business can manage.

Domestic Abuse Education has a sister company, Kameo Recruitment , the men in the Kameo

Recruitment team took the White Ribbon promise earlier this year, you can read more about that

here. In short, the White Ribbon Promise is a public pledge to never commit, excuse or remain silent

about violence against women. Once the promise has been taken it signifies a personal commitment

to actively stand against gender-based violence and support survivors; this simple commitment can

alter lives, shape conversations amongst men around gender-based violence and help break the

cycle of abuse.

Forward Ladies Awards - November 2023

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 11:18:24 GMT

PEGS Attended the Forward Ladies Awards on the 24th November 2023.

It was a huge privilege for PEGS to attend the 2023 Forward Ladies Leadership Summit & Awards , which celebrated so many fantastic women across the UK and beyond. This was the 13th annual summit and awards hosted by Forward Ladies and the theme of 2023 was Breaking Barriers. Forward Ladies celebrates the crucial impacts of female leadership, innovation and entrepreneurship, and honours the achievements of women who are breaking barriers with their work and leadership across both the public and private sectors.

Ellie (PEGS Service Manager) and Sophia (PEGS CPA Practitioner) attended this inspiring event following Ellie being shortlisted as a finalist in the category of 'Rising Star of the Year' for strong, female leaders who are in the early stages of their leadership careers. The day was one filled with highly motivating panel discussions, brilliant talks from some amazing women in their respective fields, and much networking with other attendees who shared the Forward Ladies ethos. PEGS is always so appreciative to attend events like this one, where strong women are honoured and celebrated for the work they do and the leadership they demonstrate.

A note from Sophia on the event: 'I was so honoured to attend this event with our brilliant PEGS Service Manager, Ellie. Ellie is an excellent leader at PEGS and is a strong woman who should absolutely be recognised by organisations like Forward Ladies. I would like to thank the wonderful individuals in attendance at this event with whom we had some really insightful conversations.'

16 Days of Activism - Day 6 - Parent Real Talk

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 09:30:20 GMT

Parent Real Talk, PRT, Inc. host a roundtable discussion on child to parent violence and abuse

CPVA 2023 – Recognizing Child to Parent Violence and Abuse Awareness Day, Parent Real Talk hosted a roundtable discussion to raise awareness to cpva and explore ways in which all family members living with this issue can be properly supported by any system that service children and families.

Panel members consisted of law enforcement, forensic psychologist, victim specialist, and community mental health all sharing their perspective of how families experiencing abuse by a child can benefit from interagency collaboration through systems of care.

Since its inception in 2022, Parent Real Talk has made significant steps in raising awareness to cpva by receiving a resolution and proclamation from two of the largest counties in the state of Michigan.

Tabatha Ross-Brown, President & CEO of Parent Real Talk shared “We will continue to use our platform to bring awareness to this troubling issue. No one should be abused, ever, not by an intimate partner, a parent, and certainly not by a child.

You can follow Parent Real Talk on their Facebook Page

16 Days of Activism - Day 4 - Carrie Bower

Tue, 28 Nov 2023 10:08:18 GMT

Carrie Bower -

Carrie is a freelance Victim Focus trainer and founder of a blog knowyourplace.uk which aims to raise the visibility of women in mid and later life, who are affected by trauma and domestic abuse. Being harmed and abused by your child (and adult child) for decades is traumatic. Victim blaming all of kinds is entrenched in our society, and particularly for mothers of sons who are frequently shamed into believing they are inadequate parents, lacking in skills or boundaries. These myths and stereotypes are often inaccurate and harmful.

Here is an extract from Carrie’s blog Boys will be Boys :

Rick is an only child, as a child, he was very sporty, often the captain of various sports teams, he was often getting into fights at school & known as a troublemaker. He was encouraged by his father to fight like a man. During his parents’ separation, Rick developed a reputation of being a ‘bit of a lad’, with a string of girlfriends who Diane frequently had to console after he had broken their heart, when they’d discovered his infidelity. His father would fist bomb him, declaring his pride.

Rick is manipulative, & he has an aggressive side, which Diane only see’s when she refuses to help him with a debt. So, she’s learnt it’s easiest & safest to just give him what he needs & go without. His father does the same, so he drifts between the two of them, knowing as their only child he can persuade or if necessary, force their hand.

Rick is currently living with Diane, whilst he awaits trial for non-fatal strangulation & coercive controlling behaviour of his former partner. Living with Diane is part of his release conditions. Rick has a long record of being arrested for sexual assaults of colleagues & previous partners, but he has never been charged, cases are dropped with no further action. Leaving Rick feeling he is invincible. Diane has only recently discovered this, during contact with the police. A secret Rick had kept from her for years.

Diane is persuaded by Rick of his innocence, that he is targeted by women, who are attracted to his tall, muscular build, but make ‘false’ accusations when he is unfaithful. Diane believes the narrative that they are doing it as an act of revenge. She believes he is weak when it comes to ‘irresistible’ women who tempt him to stray, just like his father was. He convinces his ‘Mamma Bear’ (his nickname for her) that he is a lover not a fighter & would never ever harm a woman.

Diane has doubts but pushes them away. Deep inside, she wants to believe her son’s innocence, after all if he is guilty, she would blame herself. She is his mother, she raised him & he is her responsibility. She feels ashamed & often asks herself where she went wrong.

16 Days of Activism

Sat, 25 Nov 2023 12:30:00 GMT

Today marks the start of 16 Days of Activism and we'd like to share with you how PEGS is getting involved.

Every year from 25th November - International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women , through to 10th December - International Human Rights Day , an international campaign of 16 days of activism against Gender-Based Violence takes place.

One of our 4 main aims at PEGS is raising awareness of Child to Parent Abuse. Whilst CPA continues to be under-reported we do know that like other forms of domestic abuse, it is gendered. In our 2022 parent survey, almost every single respondent was a woman and 61% of the children displaying abusive behaviours identified as male.

Across the 16 Days of Activism, we wanted to shine a light on 16 services and organisations that are campaigning to end violence against women and girls. We will be sharing content across all our social media and in the blog section of our website, to help amplify some of the fantastic work that is being done in the VAWG sector. There’ll be a different service or organisation featured each day.

Do please get involved by liking, sharing, and commenting.

Find our social media here:

Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | LinkedIn

PEGS releases report into Child to Parent Abuse and the impact during the school holidays.

Wed, 25 Oct 2023 14:17:34 GMT

PEGS has released a report into the impact of Child to Parent Abuse during school holidays.

The report details the experiences of parents and caregivers with school-aged children who are displaying abusive behaviours, capturing how this affects both school attendance and family life.

Child to Parent Abuse can take many forms including physical, verbal, economic, emotional, digital, coercion and control and even sexual. Experts believe that between 3 and 10% of parents will experience this form of Domestic Abuse.

Since they started providing services in 2020, PEGS have heard how some parents experience an increase in incidents of abusive behaviours during school holidays, whereas for others the behaviours decreased or even stopped altogether. PEGS wanted to explore this in more detail to gain a better understanding of what families were seeing and what support was needed during these times.

Key findings from the report show that during the six-week summer holidays;

100% of the parents were being verbally abused by their child.
Half the parents reported an increase in the frequency and severity of behaviours.
Almost 80% were experiencing abusive behaviour on a daily basis
Almost a quarter of parents had to see their G.P due to physical abuse from their child, and 1 in 5 parents required medical attention from A and E departments.

Other findings revealed the impact on others in the home, with 72% of parents saying their other children are being directly or indirectly impacted by the abusive behaviours their sibling is displaying.

100% of parents stated that someone other than PEGS is aware of their situation, yet 43% said that other than PEGS support no other service has offered or provided any help.

Out of the 79% of schools that are aware of parents being abused by their child, 14% of parents have had warning letters of intended action of fines for their child not attending education. Further adding to parents' feelings of blame, isolation, fear and worry.

Parents were also asked what services they felt support would be most beneficial from, with 61% naming social care. 48% said Domestic Abuse organisations or other relevant charities, and a quarter of parents stated that support from their G.P. would be helpful.

You can read and download the report here.

PEGS will continue to raise awareness, provide support to those who need us, and deliver training to professionals.

PEGS announces conference for their Child to Parent Abuse Covenant

Wed, 25 Oct 2023 11:17:06 GMT

PEGS announces conference for their Child to Parent Abuse Covenant

PEGS is delighted to announce that they are hosting a conference on their Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) in November.

CPAC is a free resource for any UK employer and was launched in October 2021 with the support of the Department for Work and Pensions. The main aim of the covenant is to help employers effectively support staff and volunteers who are experiencing abusive behaviours from their children.

The term Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) covers a range of abusive behaviours displayed by a child of any age (including adult offspring), towards their parent, carer, or guardian. Often other family members such as siblings are impacted too, and experts believe between 3% and 10% of UK households could be affected.

CPA includes physical, financial, verbal, emotional, digital, and even sexual abuse – and often has a profound impact not only on family life but also on the parent’s relationships, physical health, mental well-being, and employment.

In 2021, 70% of parents told PEGS how their employment has been impacted resulting in a reduction in work hours or parents having to leave employment altogether. This figure increased to 74% in 2022. You can find out more about the impact of CPA on parents, carers, and guardians linked here.

PEGS has had a successful first 2 years of the CPAC in encouraging employers from various sectors to sign up to the covenant, from national charities through to statutory services - with Telford and Wrekin Council being the only Local authority in the UK to have signed up, and smaller independent businesses who have shown their commitment to the Covenant and their staff.

Our Founding Director Michelle John explained the main aim was to ensure employers included CPA in their policies and practices around domestic abuse, as well as bringing the often-hidden issue to the attention of more organisations across the UK.

“With so many parents telling us how their work was being affected due to their child’s behaviour, we wanted to change this for them and decided to create a scheme to help employers to help their employees and volunteers. Having the support from the DWP to create the covenant has been incredible."

The conference will highlight the need for employers to become more informed of Child to Parent Abuse, the impact that it has on employees and volunteers, as well as hearing from those who have signed the CPAC already.

There will be keynote talks from PEGS' Founding Director, a panel of employers, a fireside chat with another covenant, and lived experiences. With attendance from local, regional, and national employers across a multitude of sectors, this is set to be a powerful and enlightening event.

The conference is being held on Tuesday 21st November, from 1pm - 4pm at the National Halifax Flagship Office - 118,132 New Oxford St, London. Whilst the event is free to attend, spaces are limited. If you would like to find out more about the event you can get in touch with PEGS at admin@pegsupport.com or you can register your interest to attend by completing this form below.

PEGS attend the launch of Telford & Wrekin's Domestic Abuse Service

Wed, 11 Oct 2023 10:53:05 GMT

PEGS were delighted to be represented at the launch of Telford & Wrekin's Domestic Abuse Service

PEGS were delighted that one of our practitioners, Sophia, was able to attend the Telford & Wrekin Domestic Abuse Launch on the 5th October. It was a fantastic opportunity to network with other professionals across the sector.

A word from Sophia on the event:

"I was very privileged to attend the launch of Telford & Wrekin's Domestic Abuse Service last week. Throughout the morning, we heard from various different professionals and organisations within the domestic abuse sector which began with an insightful message from Nicole Jacobs, Domestic Abuse Commissioner. The event provided a fantastic opportunity to network with other agencies, both those that work locally and on a national level, and I was able to connect with many different professionals during the session to share the important work we do at PEGS. In making such connections, the professionals at the event and I had valuable discussions around supporting families and access to appropriate support services. I am thankful to the main providers of Telford & Wrekin's Domestic Abuse Service, Cranstoun and West Mercia Women's Aid, for their powerful input to this event."

PEGS Service Manager Nominated for Forward Ladies Rising Star of the Year Award

fundraising@pegsupport.com (Sam Brown) — Mon, 09 Oct 2023 10:33:39 GMT

PEGS were thrilled to find out that Ellie, our service manager, has been shortlisted for the Rising Star of the Year award for the Forward Ladies Leadership Summit & Awards 2023!

Forward Ladies are a fantastic organisation, a team of women who close the gender gap within business. They celebrate the achievements and accomplishments of women at their yearly awards ceremony.

Being nominated for an award by Forward Ladies is very difficult, with them celebrating only the most successful and influential women in their field.

They recognise exceptional female talent, and for Ellie to have been shortlisted for such an esteemed award shows just how great her contribution to PEGS has been during the time she has been with us.

Due to unforeseen circumstances earlier in the year, Ellie had to manage our team whilst Michelle (our founding director) was away. We are really pleased that these efforts have not only been recognised and appreciated by the team here at PEGS, but also organisations such as Forward Ladies.

While we take great pride in the service we offer to parents and professionals, PEGS also internally celebrates and values its staff and it truly is excellent that our service manager has been nominated for an award like this. We are looking forward to the awards ceremony and wish Ellie, and all the other nominees the best of luck!

PEGS create post for a new well-being practitioner

fundraising@pegsupport.com (Sam Brown) — Mon, 02 Oct 2023 09:27:19 GMT

Thanks to funding from The National Lottery, PEGS are delighted to announce the opening of a new role for a well-being practitioner

Thanks to funding from The National Lottery, PEGS are delighted to announce that we have created a new post for a well-being practitioner!

This role is of huge importance to us as a service. We are fully aware of the impact CPA can have on the well-being of parents. CPA causes 97% of parents to change their routine and lifestyles, often meaning they are forced to stop doing the activities that focus on their self-care and contribute to enhanced feelings of well-being.

Since our inception, parents have consistently informed us that the abusive behaviours they are experiencing from their child are having a negative effect on their well-being. A recent survey showed that over ¾ of parents experiencing CPA feel isolated and helpless. By creating a role for a well-being practitioner, we will be able to provide support to parents and help them make time for self-care, which is imperative during a very difficult period in their life.

There is a high demand for the service we provide. Due to there being such a large number of parents needing our support, the addition of a well-being practitioner will help the team to carry on providing support to parents experiencing CPA.

Nearly half of parents reported feeling unheard in a recent survey. The support they receive from the well-being practitioner will help them to understand that they are heard, and that there will always be someone advocating for them. Once they know they are not alone, their experience will only become easier.

This is a role that will be orientated around helping our parents, through virtual one-to-one and group support, as well as in person walk & talk sessions in Shropshire and Derbyshire where parents can open up in a safe space with others who are going through similar experiences. Walk & talk sessions will promote positive mental health through exercise, community cohesion and the use of green spaces.

For the parents who aren’t able to commute to the locations where the walk & talk sessions will take place; the well-being practitioner will host monthly online sessions based around meditation and mindfulness. So, wherever parents are, they can benefit from self-care sessions, whether in person or online.

PEGS has supported over 3,500 parents so far. Complementing our current practitioner team, our new well-being practitioner will be able to make a real difference and help us to increase this number even more.

We are massively grateful for this funding and wanted to thank The National Lottery for their generosity and for the belief that they have shown in PEGS.

Technology Facilitated Domestic Abuse

fundraising@pegsupport.com (Sam Brown) — Wed, 27 Sep 2023 09:52:10 GMT

PEGS attend Technology Facilitated Domestic Abuse training with Refuge

With the rise, development and advancement of technology in recent times, there has been an increase in technology facilitated domestic abuse. Due to this being an ever-growing issue, the team at PEGS enrolled on a highly informative online training session with Refuge , a domestic violence charity that supports women and children. Refuge is the only UK charity that has a specialist team dedicated to supporting women and children experiencing technology facilitated abuse.

This was a fantastic opportunity for us, and has massively increased our awareness and knowledge on this specific area of domestic abuse.

Whilst the session we attended was focused on domestic partner abuse, we also found it useful as a child to parent abuse organisation.

Najad led the session and made it engaging and helpful for all of us. We are an organisation who have knowledge and expertise in the domestic abuse sector, but even for us the session did educate us on topics we previously knew little about.

PEGS staff who took part in the course have said it has already helped them when speaking to parents and that they have been able to offer better support to parents who are suffering digital abuse as a result of the training. As a team who are advocating for parents experiencing Child to Parent domestic abuse, we are always keen to learn as much as possible to provide the best possible service to our parents.

“I was fortunate enough to attend the 'Digital Abuse Awareness Training' with Refuge .

It was both informative and eye opening!

It was packed with information about the types of digital abuse there are, and how this can impact an individual's freedom, safety and wellbeing.

The information I gained from this course will directly help me to better support the parents who use our service.

It has also prompted me to review my own online security!

Many thanks.”

Cathy Hughes

Child to Parent Abuse Practitioner

For anyone who wants to learn more about this topic, and the methods that can be put in place to help prevent this type of abuse occurring, we would highly recommend the Refuge training programme. We thank them for their time in putting the session on.

Please find attached some links to Refuge ’s website and social media accounts:

https://refuge.org.uk/?gad=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwuZGnBhD1ARIsACxbAVg4PMZ0n29ZrxmmVZ-raT7KaOUtbAW7CdGz-vQ4Orc7bWBprRWbRAwaAkXeEALw_wcB

www.refugetechsafety.org

https://twitter.com/RefugeCharity

https://www.facebook.com/RefugeCharity/?locale=en_GB

https://www.instagram.com/refugecharity/?hl=en

PEGS launches free CPA Awareness Day resource pack

fundraising@pegsupport.com (Sam Brown) — Thu, 21 Sep 2023 13:10:12 GMT

PEGS launches free CPA Awareness Day resource pack.

Last year, PEGS launched the first ever CPA Awareness Day. It is safe to say we were overwhelmed at the interaction and involvement that the event saw, with many people getting involved in different ways. Strong connections were made, and are still present now. Media coverage was also prevalent which was important for raising as much as awareness as possible about CPA. The event successfully managed to encourage discussions, create more knowledge on CPA and, most importantly, helped to show parents experiencing CPA that they are not alone and that there is support for them out there.

You can find out about what happened last year: https://www.pegsupport.co.uk/pegs-launches-successful-cpa-awareness-day

CPA Awareness Day 2023 is just around the corner! It will take place on October 14th. Attached to this page you will be able to find a resource pack which will provide extensive details about what this year’s event will entail and how you all can get involved!

PEGS wanted to create and share resources with you so that you can join in on the day itself.

Feel free to share this blog with your other connections so they too can access the resources. In addition to this, we would love to know what you are doing for CPA Awareness Day. Please let us know on social media and don’t forget to use the hashtags:

#CPAAwarenessDay

#ChildtoParentAbuse

#PEGSCPA

#CPA

The Awareness Day will make a big difference to those who need help and support. You can access the pack using the link below:

Meet the Team: Sophia

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Mon, 18 Sep 2023 13:09:27 GMT

In the latest edition of 'Meet the Team', we spoke to Sophia about her role within PEGS

Sophia has been with us since April, and is part of our fantastic practitioner team.

This is an insight into Sophia’s role within PEGS:

“No two days are ever the same at PEGS! However, I would say that a typical day for me involves firstly checking in with colleagues and looking over what I have planned for that day - always with a brew! Generally, my days are spent supporting parents on a one-to-one basis, hosting drop-in sessions, and running workshops. I love building relationships with those I am privileged to speak with in my role, and I am incredibly grateful that parents, guardians and carers share with us. My days can also include things like attending events and meetings to tell others about the work we do at PEGS, and hopefully reach those that may need us or that may know someone who needs us.”

PEGS Office Opening Day

fundraising@pegsupport.com (Sam Brown) — Thu, 14 Sep 2023 08:07:27 GMT

Celebrating PEGS new office opening with professionals across the Domestic Abuse sector

The 11 ^th of September marked the opening day for our new Shrewsbury office. Professionals across different areas of the domestic abuse sector attended, as well as members of staff from both our Shrewsbury and Derbyshire offices.

The event was a great success and hugely beneficial for us in regards to creating new networks, and strengthening our pre-existing ones with long-term friends of PEGS.

We were privileged to have the High Sheriff of Shropshire, Mandy Thorn, officially open our office at the beginning of the event. Mandy spoke highly of PEGS and what Michelle and the team have achieved, which everyone was greatly appreciative of.

After that, there was an opportunity for people to get to know each other, with members of the PEGS team speaking to professionals about our specific roles, and getting an interesting insight into what they do within their organisations.

Comments from those in attendance show just how much support PEGS has across the sector:

“It was a pleasure to attend PEGS new office opening, celebrating the teams’ achievements in raising awareness about CPA, influencing policy, and supporting over 3000 parents & guardians. The event brought together professionals both locally and nationally and gave us all an opportunity to connect and understand more about each other’s roles. Working with PEGS has ensured I include Child to Parent Abuse (including adult children) in training, policies & resources for those affected.”

Carrie Bower Founder of knowyourplace.uk & Third Sector Domestic Abuse Lead

“It was wonderful to be able to help celebrate Michelle and her incredible team with their new office opening. As a Service Manager for a DA refuge and spearheading another CIC to support people to set up their own business after fleeing DA I know that the work that the PEGS team are doing is absolutely vital.” (Gemma Roberts - Service Manager, Safenet Domestic Abuse Services and Fly Anyway Foundation)

"It was an absolute joy to attend the Opening of PEGS new office in Shrewsbury. As well as some wonderful networking opportunities with like-minded and equally passionate professionals, I never grow tired of how Michelle, Ellie and the rest of the team have gone about tackling this still sometimes taboo subject matter. The knowledge base of the team is outstanding, the tenacity and empathy of dealing with people in difficult situations second to none. The amazing thing was to hear someone speak to me about the support PEGS had given them after seeing the post on LinkedIn ( in a completely unrelated meeting in another part of the Midlands). The need is great, however the solutions are greater and evermore accessible , In Michelle's own words ( and I love this quote) From the Pain comes the Power!!" In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." Michelle and her team at PEGS are certainly doing that."

Clive Thomas, Partnership Co-ordinator, Serco

Along with Carrie, Gemma and Clive, we also had representatives of Manchester City Council, Cranstoun, ISEV, Shropshire Community Foundation, DWP and Zomma.

A word from Michelle about the event:

“It was fantastic to see support for PEGS from local, regional and national organisations. This is testament to the whole team and their dedication to supporting those impacted by CPA. I would like to extend my thanks to everyone who made the event such a success.”

We want to express our sincere gratitude to everyone who attended the event, with people taking the time out of their day to travel from different parts of the country. We hope everyone found it as useful and beneficial as we did and hope to see you all again soon!

PEGS wins Global Recognition Award.

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Tue, 05 Sep 2023 13:26:53 GMT

PEGS team wins Global Recognition Award.

It was celebration for the whole team last week as PEGS was awarded a 2023 global recognition award. We are so privileged to have such fantastic colleagues who have so many incredible skills, knowledge and expertise that makes PEGS the service that we are. Without our team, we could not deliver all that we do, they are crucial to PEGS and crucial to those experiencing child to parent abuse.

The judging panel for the awards commented that “Several facets of PEGS' operations make them an outstanding candidate for a 2023 Global Recognition Award. The company provides comprehensive parent support, equips organizations and professionals with crucial knowledge and training on handling CPA, improves policy systems pertinent to CPA, and works tirelessly towards raising public awareness. The global impact of their work is evident in their establishment as an authoritative voice on CPA, not just in the UK, but across different regional and national platforms”.

Our founding Director Michelle John said “I founded PEGS not fully knowing what it would be, I just knew that change had to happen. That parents had a safe space to go to be heard, supported and empowered. I can’t put into words how fantastic it is to see the organisation grow as it has and to have the team be awarded recognition at this level is testament to their dedication to those experiencing CPA. I am incredibly proud of our team; they all have a place in making change for those who need us. Without their commitment, support and belief in our work PEGS wouldn't be where we are today. “

Guest Blog: Working Families - 'Caring in a crisis: Options for taking the leave you need.'

admin@pegsupport.com (PEGS Admin) — Wed, 30 Aug 2023 13:57:46 GMT

Caring in a crisis: Options for taking the leave you need.

Family life can be incredibly tough. When faced with a crisis, there may be times you need to take time off unexpectedly. Sometimes, family circumstances mean you just need to spend more time away from work. If your role currently doesn’t allow any flexibility to manage these situations, don’t panic, there are other options available to you. It’s always a good idea to be aware of your employment rights before the time comes when you may need to exercise them.

Emergency time off for dependants

From the first day as an employee, you have the right to take unpaid time off work to manage certain situations affecting your dependants. Sometimes this is called ‘Time off for Dependants’ or ‘Emergency Family Leave’ and it is aimed at dealing with emergencies.

The time you take should be deemed necessary and reasonable. But it’s always worth checking your employment contract or leave policy, as employers may give more generous emergency family leave than the statutory minimum.

Our advice would be to approach your employer to explain your situation to determine the most appropriate type of leave available. They may be able to offer you a paid alternative, or an alternative that allows you more time off.

You can read more about the details of this type of leave here: https://workingfamilies.org.uk/articles/time-off-for-dependants-leave/

Parental Leave

Parents of children under 18 can take unpaid parental leave if they have been with their employer at least a year. Parents can take up to a total of 18 weeks altogether for each of their children before the child is 18, and it is limited to four weeks a year. Although you can be expected to give 21 days’ notice, it’s always worth discussing with your employer whether you can take this at short notice if needed.

Employers can require parents taking parental leave for non-disabled children to take it in blocks of a week. Parents taking parental leave for a disabled child (who is entitled to Disability Living Allowance or Personal Independence Payment) can take it in blocks of a day.

Your employer cannot refuse you leave or penalise you for taking parental leave, but there are circumstances in which employers can postpone parental leave.

Flexible Working Request

Having a flexible working arrangement can help you cope with the ebbs and flows of family life, as well as manage work in a crisis.

Although hybrid and remote working are the most common, there are countless ways to work flexibly, the beauty of which is there is always a type of flexible working that will fit your role. Reduced or compressed hours, changing start and finish times, term-time or annualised hours, flexitime, job share – the list goes on. There’s no one way to work flexibly, instead it’s best achieved with a solution that is tailored to both your needs, and the needs of your employer.

You have the right to request flexible working if you have been in your role for 26 weeks, and from next year when new legislation comes into effect, you will be able to request flex from day one, and make multiple requests a year.

We have wealth of resources here on how to negotiate and make a flexible working request, as well as what to do if a request is turned down. If granted, a flexible working request is permanent, so make clear if you only need temporary support. https://workingfamilies.org.uk/articles/flexible-

CPA or Challenging Behaviour?

Wed, 23 Aug 2023 13:34:06 GMT

CPA or Challenging Behaviour? The differences and similarities

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) is a form of domestic abuse that unfortunately isn’t always given the attention it needs. Forms of abuse such as intimate partner abuse and parent to child abuse tend to be focused on far more seriously than CPA. This then leads to misconceptions and a general lack of understanding regarding what CPA is. It is important to note that knowledge of this particular type of abuse is in its infancy. This makes it difficult for many people to pinpoint the difference between CPA and the typical challenging behaviours that most children are expected to display at some point in time. It is also important to note that there are various issues that a child could be going through that add further complexity when it comes to being a parent.

CPA comes in an array of different forms; verbal, physical, emotional, financial, coercion & control, digital and sexual. When offering support to parents and caregivers, we look at a variety of factors, such as the frequency and intensity of incidents.

97% of the parents we support tell us that they have had to change their routine and lifestyles to reduce the risk of abusive behaviour occurring. Parents feel like they are walking on eggshells around their child, living in constant fear of an incident of abuse occurring. CPA leads to parents feeling isolated from loved ones.

Of the working parents we support, 74% have been forced to either leave work or reduce their hours. Parents can be subjected to daily or weekly physical attacks, intimidation and verbal abuse. This often leads to multiple calls for help to both the police and professionals who work within the family sector.

We understand that a child’s challenging behaviour can be very difficult and often unpleasant for a parent to deal with. However, it is pivotal that we don’t confuse CPA with challenging behaviour that is often common in children and adolescents.

If you are a parent or caregiver who is struggling as a result of your child’s challenging behaviour, there are a variety of services out there who can provide you with the necessary support. We do all that we can to help parents, but only ones who are strictly experiencing abuse from their child, not challenging behaviour.

Below is a diagram with some examples of abusive behaviour, challenging behaviour and behaviour that could be abusive OR challenging depending on the particular circumstance. It is important to note that this diagram isn’t exhaustive, this is a very light touch overview of the difference between what we consider challenging and abusive. We hope that this has provided you with an overview of the key differences between the two types of behaviour, and encourage you to get in touch with us if there is any further information you require.

PEGS enters 2nd year of Lottery funding

michellej@pegsupport.com (Michelle John) — Fri, 11 Aug 2023 11:34:41 GMT

PEGS enters its second year of Lottery funding, a message from our founder, Michelle.

As PEGS starts its second funded year of providing support to parents, carers and guardians, we wanted to share the highs, the difficulties and everything in between from year one.

This project has seen so much growth and learning and we as an organisation are so grateful and thankful to the Lottery for investing and believing in us and our vision. At the time we were a relatively new organisation with limited experience of the funding and grant world as well as delivering our front-line services, so to receive such a large fund, despite being early on in our journey was exciting and certainly greatly needed, as well as being daunting if not slightly scary.

This project has enabled us to open a new office in Bretby Business Park, Derbyshire and employ more staff (including apprentices) all of whom are local to the area, meaning we have helped local employment grow too. We have a service manager, a referral team and a practitioner team along with social media support who complement the existing team in Shrewsbury.

We have had to pivot at times especially when demand was incredibly high, being able to adapt in this way has really helped us to learn and respond when needed. Our incredible team who are doing the do, often share their thoughts and suggestions which means they too are actively involved with the running of PEGS and our services and being the voice of those who need us.

These past 12 months have seen us increase our suite of services and access to our practitioner team, it has enabled us to deliver multiple workshops, programmes and bespoke support which includes advocacy. We have been able to introduce a virtual drop in provision for professionals so that we can offer support and guidance to them too.

Our reach has excelled and we have been so lucky to connect with others outside of the UK and we are especially proud of our connections with Tabitha at Parent Real Talk and supporting her with her journey in America which has seen the initial steps of CPA being recognised in the state of Michigan. You can read more about this at the bottom of the page.

We have built some amazing friendships along the way and the support these individuals, organisations and the media show us is simply incredible – we are so thankful to the friends of PEGS who help us to continue our work whilst also raising the awareness of Child to Parent Abuse.

Right at the heart of all that we do are the parents, carers and guardians. We continue to ask them what they need or want from PEGS, ensuring that they have a voice in the support they access. PEGS will not be right for everyone and that’s okay, what matters is those who need support are able to access it in a way that works for them and their families without them having to meet criteria or have added pressure of trying to find funds to pay for help.

I set PEGS up not knowing what it would be, I just knew there had to be change, change can start with anyone of us at any time, scary – yes, unknown – yes but the passion I have to create change is what drives this forward. What we feed will grow, fear or faith? We get to choose and I choose FAITH. Having people who believe in me, my vision and want to come on the journey with us as a team has been nothing short of phenomenal. My 3 year ago self, during her time of need, thanks everyone for taking a chance, for standing alongside her and for believing in her.

To the National lottery, especially Amanda who has held our hand over these past 12 months, thank you just doesn’t seem enough – ‘ Funding is more than just money, it is directly changing lives ‘.

Celebrations in London, the SE100 awards.

Thu, 20 Jul 2023 11:37:09 GMT

PEGS attend the NatWest & Pioneers Post SE100 awards.

For the 3rd year running PEGS made the top 100 social enterprises, celebrated by Natwest and Pioneers Post last Monday evening. PEGS Founder Michelle, along with staff members Sophia and Dylan, attended the awards ceremony held in central London.

This year PEGS and Michelle were nominated for the ‘Trailblazing Newcomer’ award. This award recognises social enterprise startups, with a clear mission that can demonstrate positive growth and impact, as well as great promise for the future. The whole PEGS team were delighted to have been nominated and it was such a privilege to be named alongside so many incredible social enterprises.

The SE100 awards were created by Pioneers Post more than a decade ago with the aim to support the development and growth of social enterprises and mission driven businesses. The night was no different, as the event showcased a fabulous array of social enterprise businesses across seven categories of awards. From incredible work with young people, music, wellbeing, families, the environment and social change. The future definitely looks bright for the top 100 social enterprises.

Commencing the evening was a short introduction from Andrew Harrison, the chair of NatWest Social & Community Capital. He acknowledged the social enterprises “creativity and resilience in tackling society’s biggest challenges”. Hosting the evening was Tim West, founder of Pioneers Post, he shared his thoughts on how despite the challenging recent times of Covid and the tight finances, “the overall attitude expressed was far from gloomy”.

The awards offered a great chance for networking and making connections. PEGS were pleased to learn about and meet some incredible organisations with exciting visions and prospects for the future. Making lasting connections is important in the mission of social change and as always, it was great to meet up with some of PEGS friends in person too.

PEGS staff member Sophia said “It was such a privilege to attend the NatWest SE100 awards. We had some great conversations with other enterprises and professionals and it was very inspiring to see all of the wonderful work being done in the community. The event also provided a great opportunity for us to tell others about the valuable work we are privileged to do at PEGS.”

PEGS would like to share a special mention and congratulations for ‘Spoke World’, who won the ‘Trailblazing Newcomer’ award. An exciting organisation that incorporates mental health tools, into music and lyrics, please do go and check them out below.

You can find out more about the event on the Pioneers Post website, also featured below.

Celebrating the Covenant Consortium anniversary

Sat, 24 Jun 2023 10:52:58 GMT

As founders of a Covenant designed to help employers support staff experiencing an often-hidden form of abuse, we were invited to help celebrate the anniversary of the Social Mobility Pledge Consortium.

This brings together a range of Government-back Covenants designed to assist organisations when it comes to hiring or putting provisions in place for employees or volunteers experiencing specific situations.

Service Manager Ellie Beaumont and Corporate Trainer Emma Roscoe from PEGS took part in the event at Tottenham Hotspur Football Club on Tuesday (20 ^th June), where Mims Davies, Parliamentary Under Secretary of State at the DWP, addressed attendees.

We launched the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) in conjunction with the Department for Work and Pensions approximately 18 months ago, becoming the fourth such agreement in existence.

It’s designed to ensure any employees who are experiencing abusive behaviours from their offspring feel more confident to speak up at work, knowing they will be supported as much as possible to continue their career.

It was launched after a PEGS survey found around 70% of parents had reduced their hours or left work altogether as a direct result of their situation at home. Given upwards of 3% of UK households are estimated to be affected by Child to Parent Abuse, this represents a significant impact on the economy, as well as for the individual people and organisations involved.

Other members of the Consortium include the Armed Forces, Care Leavers, Employers Domestic Abuse, and Ambitious about Autism Covenants – now joined by the Employer Covenant for the Empowerment of Girls and Women, which was officially unveiled at the anniversary event.

Emma said the day was fantastic and saw lots of networking and conversations taking place, adding: “What was so refreshing was that regardless of which Covenant people were involved with, which organisation or service they were representing, or whether they were there as an employer wanting to find out more about the Covenants – everybody was coming from a place of wanting to be part of creating lasting and impactful change for people’s lives.

“Having all the covenants together was really powerful - hearing about their progress so far and plans for the future.

“It was brilliant to have the opportunity to represent PEGS on stage, talking to Tony Hyland MBE from the DWP about CPAC, and sharing our Covenant with everyone in the room.”

Click here to find out more about signing up for free – it takes less than two minutes and entitles organisations to attend an exclusive online webinar and a range of resources and ongoing support.

Safeguarding Conference features CPA workshop

Sat, 17 Jun 2023 22:04:11 GMT

Our Founding Director has been asked to lead a workshop at an upcoming Safeguarding Conference.

Michelle John will be taking part in The East Riding Voluntary Action Services’ (ERVAS) Safeguarding Conference on Thursday 6 ^th July near Hull. The event will be attended by VCSE groups and organisations within the East Riding and surrounding areas.

She will be leading a workshop at 2.15pm and will be on hand through the day to talk to attendees about Child to Parent Abuse – which impacts at least 3% of UK households.

ERVAS is a charity which supports a network of voluntary organisations across the area to help strengthen delivery and build resilience within communities. Other workshops taking place at their conference – which is free to attend – are focused around topics including abuse of older adults, cyber crime and fraud prevention, and modern day slavery.

Michelle said: “Thank you to the organising team for inviting us to attend the day and for the opportunity to speak to those coming along about this important, but often hidden, form of domestic abuse.

“We know ERVAS has a fantastic network of voluntary groups and charities across East Riding, so it’s great to be able to support them to become more aware of Child to Parent Abuse and how it may impact the people their organisations represent and assist.

“Part of our work at PEGS is focused on supporting all organisations to become more aware of CPA and, where appropriate, to have policies and practices in place for not only their service users but also their own staff and volunteers.”

To book your free ticket for the ERVAS Conference, click here .

Elder Abuse resource released to mark awareness day

Wed, 14 Jun 2023 23:23:55 GMT

Today (June 15th) marks World Elder Abuse Awareness Day , a day to raise awareness and put in place actions to reduce the impact of abuse directed towards older people across the world.

Given the number of older people sadly impacted by Child to Parent Abuse, PEGS has put together a resource highlighting some of the ways in which additional challenges faced by this section of society may open them up to specific types of CPA behaviours. The resource also summarises some key areas of research, and links to further reports, organisations and studies which may be of use to those wanting to find out more.

To download the resource, simply click the button below.

PEGS attend the Victim Services Celebration Event

Fri, 19 May 2023 12:43:18 GMT

PEGS attend the Derbyshire Victim Services Celebration Event

Yesterday, PEGS were pleased to be in attendance of the Derbyshire Victim Services Celebration Event. Hosted by the Police and Crime Commissioner, Angelique Foster.

The event was a great opportunity for organisations such as ourselves. To recognise and celebrate the invaluable work that has been taking place in providing victim service support all throughout Derbyshire.

We saw a fabulous array of supplier showcases, which gave us insight into how some of the fabulous organisations work, and the support they offer. The day also allowed us to gain an understanding of the Police and Crime Commissioner's upcoming Police and Crime plan. In which PEGS is very impressed with the continuous hard work Angelique Foster is doing and has planned, in order to keep our communities safe.

As always events like these are a great opportunity to network and make connections with other victim service providers, to benefit those in the future who may need it. And of course, to catch up with old friends and long term collaborators of PEGS.

PEGS were extremely humbled and honoured to have been presented with the 'Certificate of Recognition and Appreciation' awarded by Police & Crime Commissioner Angelique Foster.

"In recognition of your exceptional performance and outstanding achievements in providing victim support services in Derbyshire. Your hard work, dedication, and perserverance have been instrumental in our success."

PEGS staff member Malisha said - "The day was lovely, it was great to meet with other victim support organisations, to hear about how they have been putting in tireless effort and work to provide an amazing service across Derbyshire. As a resident myself, it is also great to see the plans Angelique has, and I'm incredibly hopeful for the future of Derbyshire."

A free way to donate to PEGS

Wed, 17 May 2023 10:11:18 GMT

PEGS has signed up to a trusted scheme - used by over 7,000 online retailers - which enables donations to be made by our supporters, without them spending a single extra penny.

EasyFundraising simply requires users to sign up, choose the organisation they'd like to support, and then go via the EasyFunding website (rather than the business' direct website) to make their online purchases.

So if you're looking to buy something from ASOS, Argos, John Lewis, M&S or a host of other websites, then why not sign up to the scheme?

When you're ready to make any online order, you'll then just go to www.easyfundraising.org.uk, select the brand you want to buy from, spend exactly the same as you would on the product on their direct website - and then a donation will be made to PEGS on your behalf.

The size of the donation varies from business to business, but generally it's between 1% and 3% of the cost of your order...so it really can make a big difference to a small organisation like PEGS if people sign up and remember to use the scheme when buying online.

There's no catch, it's free to sign up, and free to use for you, so please do consider it - especially if you're someone who regularly buys online.

Thank you in advance for your support.

CPA recognised by commissioners in Michigan, USA

Fri, 05 May 2023 21:07:36 GMT

The largest county in Michigan has voted to recognise Child to Parent Abuse as a public concern.

Commissioners from Wayne County – which has more residents than any other county in the state – passed a resolution which states that the effects of CPA can create ‘an unsafe and unhealthy living environment’.

The resolution highlights that support services ‘specifically for parents or caregivers abuse by children are essentially non-existent’ with none of the same resources that are provided for those affected by other types of domestic abuse.

The latter point was raised by the organisation Parent Real Talk, PRT, Inc (Let’s Get Real with Parent Talk on social media), run by Tabatha Brown, who we’ve been delighted to connect with to share what PEGS is doing in the UK and hear what’s taking place in the USA.

Tabatha says: “I have read and re-read the resolution countless times and I still can’t believe it. The first time I read it, I felt excitement and fear – excitement because I know the validation and recognition alone is huge for families, and fear knowing this is only the beginning.

“I know recognising this is happening and providing the support needed to help these families are completely different.

“I firstly wanted to share it with PEGS and Michelle as I know this would not have been possible without all of your support.

“Besides contacting legislators, I am focusing heavily on raising awareness, sharing information with as many organisations as possible, and working on developing training.”

PEGS founder Michelle said she was thrilled to see progress being made over in the US.

“CPA happens across the world, so it’s fantastic to see organisations like Tabatha’s making strides to ensure parents in their countries are better supported.

“By working collaboratively and networking across the globe, we can learn from each other and make sure that CPA becomes better understood everywhere.”

Visit Parent Real Talk to find out more about the work being undertaken by Tabatha.

Why do we call it CPA?

Mon, 24 Apr 2023 11:36:01 GMT

There’s a long-running debate among those who work within the domestic abuse sector, and specifically those dealing with Child to Parent Abuse, about what we should actually call it.

There are all sorts of variations and – over time – some key organisations have actually changed the name and acronym by which they refer to this type of abuse.

At PEGS, we’ve used CPA since we launched our services in 2020 and we intend to continue doing so. We felt it might be helpful to explain exactly why.

We use the term child rather than adolescent, child and adolescent, or any other variation – because we’re describing the relationship between the person displaying the behaviours and the person on the receiving end of the behaviours.

It gives an incorrect perception if we use adolescent, in our opinion, because so many families are experiencing this behaviour from children well under the age of 13. In fact, over a quarter of the parents who PEGS surveyed at the end of 2022 said they were experiencing CPA before their child was 6.

And, at the other end of the scale, abuse does not necessarily stop once the person turns 18 or 21. Sadly, we see adults continuing to display these behaviours towards their parent(s). But once you become a parent, that person is your ‘child’ forever, so regardless of whether the ‘child’ is 5 or 50, we believe this term covers all persons displaying CPA.

We use the word parent to cover anyone who has a caring role or responsibility – so this includes carers, guardians, grandparents or other family members who have taken on the primary caring role (kinship carers), foster or adoptive parents, step-parents etc. PEGS’ services are available to anyone who has a parental role.

And finally we use abuse rather than violence (or violence and abuse). This is because: all violence is abusive, but not all abuse is violent. CPA can include behaviours such as coercion and control, taking out credit cards in the parent’s name and running up debts, or spreading lies about them online. None of these are violent acts, but they can form part of the abuse the person is experiencing.

Child to Parent Abuse is – we believe – an inclusive term which covers all abusive relationships between a person and someone they have/had a parent role towards.

If you’re impacted by CPA, do reach out to our team – click here to find out what services PEGS offers to parents. Or if you’d like more information, simply go to our Understanding CPA page.

Highlighting the impact of CPA on siblings

Tue, 11 Apr 2023 14:36:12 GMT

This week marks the annual Siblings Day - recognised in various places across the world as a time to highlight positive relationships between brothers and sisters.

But for some, the sibling relationship can be much trickier to navigate. There’s a whole host of reasons why this could be the case – but one of these is when Child to Parent Abuse is occurring in the house.

Just as with other forms of domestic abuse, witnessing CPA can have an impact on the other children in the home, whatever the link between them and the child displaying the behaviours.

Sadly, we also often see these behaviours being targeted towards other children as well as the parental figures in the home – we know this through what parents tell the PEGS team, but also through the responses to our annual parent surveys.

Results from our latest survey show:

52% of respondents said at least two children aged under 18 lived in their home – of these 4% had four and 2% had five under 18s living with them.

CPA can occur with offspring of any age – there were two adult children (over 18) living in the homes of 5% of our respondents, and three or more adult children living with 2% of respondents.

Where there were siblings (or those with a sibling-type relationship) living in the home, only 9% said the child displaying the abusive behaviours did not also target them.

In the cases where other children in the home were targeted, the behaviours were reported as follows:
Hitting or kicking (43% of respondents said siblings had experienced this in their home)
Strangling or suffocating (13%)
Verbal abuse (56%)
Sexual abuse (1%)
Threatening (46%)
Intimidation (47%)

At PEGS, we focus our support services around the parents, carers and guardians experiencing CPA. There are organisations out there, however, whose specialism lies with supporting children and young people through issues such as abuse – we’ve listed a few below who you may wish to reach out to if this applies to you and your family:

Childline | 0800 1111

Children’s Society | Advice about a range of issues

The Mix | For under 25s | 0808 808 4994

NHS Urgent Mental Health Helpline | England Only

NSPCC | 0808 800 5000 | help@NSPCC.org.uk

Papyrus | For under 35s dealing with suicidal thoughts | 0800 068 4141

Samaritans | 116 123

Shout | 24/7 text support for young people in crisis | Text SHOUT to 85258

Victim Support | Helping victims of crime | 0808 1689 111

Parent workshops funded by RSA

Wed, 05 Apr 2023 08:00:02 GMT

New funding will help PEGS deliver workshops for parents experiencing CPA.

A grant from the RSA (Royal Society for the Encouragement of Arts, Manufactures and Commerce) will be used to support our programme of parent-focused sessions, which aim to promote empowerment, wellbeing and resilience.

Workshops have been a core part of PEGS’ offering since launching services three years ago and are delivered at no cost to attendees, as part of our commitment to reducing the barriers which can be faced when seeking support.

Lianna Etkind, The RSA’s Fellowship Areas and Engagement Manager (Central), said: “We were impressed with the work of PEGS and the difference they make in connecting parents and supporting resilience.”

And our Founding Director Michelle John explained: “Parents tell us how isolated and alone they feel, which then impacts on their emotional and mental wellbeing.

“By being able to run specific workshops that look at teaching them tools and techniques which equip them to become more resilient, this then helps them to feel more empowered going forward.

“This is about putting parents and their needs at the centre of what we do, and giving them practical tools that they can use in their daily life, as well as them knowing there is a safe space at PEGS for them to discuss their experiences and share the impact CPA may be having upon them.”

The RSA aims to provide ‘platforms, opportunities and networks for all those who share our vision to connect, engage, share ideas and expertise’ and has been driving social impact for more than 260 years.

Their work was first brought to PEGS’ attention by The Fore , who supported us with funding early on in our journey.

To access PEGS services, parents must fill in a self-referral form or have a referral made for them by a professional .

Meet the team: Michelle

Tue, 04 Apr 2023 14:00:21 GMT

Many of you will have heard Michelle talk, met her at events or seen her quoted - but today we thought we'd give you more of an insight into the founder of PEGS as we continue our Meet the Team blog series.

Name: Michelle

Job title: Founding Director

How long have you worked for PEGS? Since it launched!

Which office are you based at? Mainly at Shrewsbury but I regularly visit the Derbyshire office and also spend plenty of time travelling round the UK attending events and leading training.

What’s your favourite thing about working for PEGS? It’s a privilege that people trust us and we’ve been able to highlight their experiences and make changes for them. When I started PEGS, I didn’t know what it was going to be really, I just knew that change had to happen. It’s been a real privilege to work with the parents and the organisations that we’ve linked in with too.

What does a typical day involve? Supporting staff, talking through safeguarding concerns or high-risk situations, meetings with various organisations, networking, creation and development of training, sometimes talking on the radio or to a journalist to help raise awareness, visiting businesses and partner organisations, liaising with the agencies who work with us to support IT, PR, fundraising etc. My days are very varied!

How do you think (or hope) your colleagues would describe you? I hope they’d say I was supportive, encouraging, that I try my best to help them achieve their full potential, empathetic, and that I truly care about their wellbeing.

When you were younger, what job did you want to do as grown up? An airline hostess!

A little bit about you: I live with my family and pets including my two guinea pigs. Aside from the guinea pigs, my favourite animals are alpacas. I really enjoy getting outdoors and growing veg in my allotment.

Which book, film and album would you take to a desert island with you? Any book by James Patterson, The Labrinyth and the album would really depend on what mood I was in but perhaps Slipknot, Stone Sour or 3 Doors Down.

Covenant founders join forces

Mon, 27 Mar 2023 07:45:00 GMT

Covenant founders join forces to encourage employers to support women and parents experiencing abuse

The creators of two UK Government-backed Covenants are set to work together to strengthen employers' responses to abuse.

Michelle John, founder of PEGS and creator of the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC), and Polly Harrar, founder of the Sharan Project and lead delivery partner of the Employers Domestic Abuse Covenant (EDAC), have joined forces to ensure more workplaces have policies and practices in place to effectively support those who are currently experiencing (or have previously experienced) Intimate Partner or Child to Parent Abuse.

Employers who sign the CPAC are committing to assisting employees and volunteers who are experiencing CPA – which impacts upwards of 3% of UK households - by implementing and developing effective policies and practices around this issue.

EDAC members are encouraged to sign up to five pledges, which includes identifying sustainable work-based opportunities for women affected by abuse to enter or re-enter the workplace.

Both organisations have signed up to the other’s Covenants, and Michelle and Polly are looking at ways they can continue to promote and raise awareness for EDAC and CPAC, which were both launched in conjunction with the Department for Work and Pensions.

Michelle said: “EDAC and CPAC are about removing the employment barriers which can be in place for people experiencing different types of domestic abuse. The workforce is losing out on a great deal of talent due to the effects of abuse; yet with the right support, those people could remain (or become) employed, to the benefit of them as individuals, their employer, and the wider community.

“We’re proud to support EDAC and the work of Polly and the Sharan Project, and we hope by working together we can encourage even more employers to think about the impact of abuse and how they can make it possible for those affected to have a fulfilling career.”

Polly added: “Partnership working is key to better understanding the impact that all forms of abuse can have on victims/survivors and now, more than ever, the role employers can play in addressing these issues can make huge a difference. We are delighted with this collaboration with CPAC and look forward to working together.”

PEGS, which founded the CPAC, is a social enterprise which supports parents experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, trains frontline professionals, influences national and regional policy, and raises awareness for this often-hidden issue.

EDAC – which has been included as a recommended in the Domestic Abuse Act - is delivered by The Sharan Project, an award-winning charity that works to empower, educate and inspire women who want to learn about the support and choices that are available to them, and provide them with the tools to lead life on their own terms.

EDAC and CPAC are third and fourth Covenants in the UK respectively, following on from the Armed Forces and Care Leavers Covenants.

Tony Hyland, DWP Senior National Account Manager, has supported the development of both Covenants and sees both as being vital in offering concrete support to appropriate victims of abuse.

“Both Polly and Michelle are inspirational leaders and both the EDAC and the CPAC offer vital support to some of our most vulnerable customers so we at DWP will continue to support in any way we can."

Visit www.edacuk.org to find out more about EDAC, and www.pegsupport.co.uk/CPAC for

Celebration and reflection as PEGS turns 3

Sun, 26 Mar 2023 12:09:12 GMT

It was a time for celebration and reflection as PEGS hosted a birthday party to mark our 3rd anniversary.

Thank you to everyone who supported us by attending, buying raffle tickets, and sending the following lovely messages on the evening!

Third Birthday Reflections

Wed, 22 Mar 2023 20:53:28 GMT

Reflections on three years of PEGS, from our founder Michelle John:

Today I have sat and reflected on PEGS turning 3 and I wanted to share these thoughts and reflections with you.

When I started PEGS, I honestly had no idea what was about to happen, I knew there were parents and caregivers who needed to be heard, supported and empowered but even I underestimated the number of those who were experiencing abusive behaviours from their child, who needed someone to believe them and believe in them.

One thing I was determined about was that those we supported would always be at the centre of what we did and how we did it. I didn’t want PEGS to be a service where we decided what these parents and caregivers needed, I wanted to create a service that they said they wanted and needed.

Three years on, we still ask for their thoughts, views and inputs, including reaching professionals – more about this later. We are incredibly privileged to do the work we do and we continually thank those who work with us for trusting us and allowing us to be part of their journey – these are the true warriors, the change makers, we just help to amplify their voices.

We are often asked about why we don’t work with the child or the whole family, that's not the direction I chose to take - but we completely believe that those who are behaving this way need support too. That’s why we work so closely with services who do that equally incredible and important work.

Parents and caregivers tell us they like PEGS being focused on them, their needs, their safety, their voice, there are so many services that focus on supporting children and young people but how many services do you know that are solely focused on you as a parent or

caregiver?

I also didn’t want to charge people to use our service, it doesn’t sit well with me charging anyone who is experiencing abuse, some of those we support are being financially abused or CPA has had an impact on their income in some way. For me, I feel charging for support creates more barriers and frankly there are enough of those as it is. PEGS will always remain free to those who are using our services.

This journey has had many highs, many learnings, and many many opportunities for growth. We’ve expanded the team, opened another office and have had provided support through various ways to over 3,000 parents or caregivers. We’ve helped to influence legislation changes, local, regional and national policies, frameworks and protocols. We created a risk assessment model as the models for domestic abuse do not fit if you are being abused by your child; that assessment has been rolled out across whole regions, police

forces and others who work with those experiencing CPA.

We’ve created a Government backed employer covenant - the 4th in the UK. We have become trusted partners of NHS Safeguarding for

England. We created a national awareness day - October 14th. We’ve created training and delivered to over 1,500 professionals. We gathered some of the largest sets of data around CPA through our annual surveys.

We’ve had funders believe in us, and give grants so we can continue and expand our work. We have made links with local, regional and national media and have been able to raise awareness both nationally and internationally. We have been nominated for and won numerous awards . We have held online conferences and in person events. We have worked with and continue to work with some of

the leading academics in this field. We have formed partnerships and at every opportunity we continue to highlight CPA and what the reality is like for so many, and sadly for some this has seen parents and caregivers being killed by their child.

Those death could have been avoided , they were asking for help - sometimes for years, they were speaking out but their voice

was silenced simply because they were a parent.

In a ideal world, PEGS wouldn’t exist, there would be no need for us, but this is not a ideal world and as long as those parents and caregivers need us, as long as the same lessons keep being learned (and truly learned), we will be here.

To every single one of you reading this who is currently experiencing, or has in the past experienced, abuse from your child, just know you are incredible, you are worthy, you are deserving, you do matter, and PEGS has got you.

All our love ��

3 Years of PEGS

Mon, 20 Mar 2023 13:52:59 GMT

This week marks three years since the first PEGS services were launched.

While it's sad that so many people have needed our support over those three years, we're also hugely humbled and proud that we have been able to help parents, train professionals and raise awareness. We wanted to reflect on some of the milestones, achievements, and key moments during our journey so far - so here's a round-up of the first 3 years of PEGS:

Meet the team: Malisha

Thu, 09 Mar 2023 20:36:52 GMT

We're continuing our series of blogs introducing each of the PEGS team today!

Name: Malisha

Job title: Admin Support

How long have you worked for PEGS? 3 Months

Which office are you based at? Derbyshire

What’s your favourite thing about working for PEGS? Being able to help and understand others.

What does a typical day involve? Triaging the incoming referrals

How do you think (or hope) your colleagues would describe you? Bubbly

When you were younger, what job did you want to do as grown up? PE Teacher

A little bit about you: I live with my 2 boys both under 3, we enjoy being outdoors and exploring.

Which book, film and album would you take to a desert island with you? Rich Dad Poor Dad, Tyler Perry Film-Madea, 90s R&B Album.

Parents name proactive PC and fantastic friend as their CPA Heroes

Fri, 17 Feb 2023 15:51:36 GMT

A supportive police officer and a caring friend have been named CPA Heroes for going above and beyond to support parents in need.

We asked for nominations for the awards – which could be a professional the family had come into contact with or a friend, neighbour or colleague.

The only criteria was that the person had to have made a difference to someone who was experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, which impacts upwards of 3% of UK households but remains a fairly hidden form of domestic abuse.

The winners can now be revealed as PC Megan Smith from North Yorkshire Police Force and Kerry Smith from Darlington.

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS, said: “The idea behind the awards was to acknowledge the amazing people out there who are going above and beyond to support parents impacted by CPA. This could either be within a personal capacity as a neighbour, friend or family member, or as a professional who’d come into contact with that parent in the course of their work.

“The nominations were truly heart-warming and inspiring, and showed just how much of a difference having a ‘CPA Hero’ in their life can make to parents going through such an extremely difficult time.

“We are so thrilled to announce Megan and Kerry as our very first CPA Heroes. They’re extremely worthy winners, as their nominations show, and we hope they are incredibly proud of the difference they have made in the lives of those who nominated them.”

The parent who nominated PC Smith said: “Megan has been extremely supportive: after many months of fighting for support for my son, numerous meetings with professionals and extensive waiting lists, I was feeling completely let down. My mental health was affected and I could not see any light at the end of the tunnel.

“One night, the police were called due to one of my son’s violent meltdowns. Megan and her colleague attended, they took the time to speak to me, my son and also my daughter. There are then, Megan gave me her word she would try her utmost to get more support in place for me and my family.

“The proactive, supportive and empathetic approach she has shown is absolutely incredible and beyond words. Multi-agency meetings have taken place with urgency and I feel our worries as a family are finally being taken seriously with no judgement. PC Megan Smith is truly a CPA Hero!”

Assistant Chief Constable Mike Walker of North Yorkshire Police added: “We are delighted that Megan’s work has been recognised by PEGS.

“The awards provide an opportunity to shine a light on a side of police work that goes on behind the scenes, but is rarely seen in the public domain.

“Megan has demonstrated compassion, empathy and understanding of a difficult and sensitive situation and ensured the family got the positive help they needed. She is a credit to North Yorkshire Police.”

And the parent who nominated Kerry Smith said she had ‘been there throughout the whole time that our family has been surviving CPA’ including late-night phone calls, helping them to move house, and helping tidy up after property had been damaged in the home by her friend’s son.

“She’s never judged, always supported, and I don’t know what I’d have done without her. She was amazing, calm and strong when I wasn’t. I will never ever be able to thank her for the things she’s knowingly and unknowingly done for us.

“She’s truly inspirational, kind and selfless. No judgement has been made and I know she’ll be there to support us as we rebuild some kind of life.”

Huge congratulations to both winners!

Raffle to raise funds for parents in need

Thu, 16 Feb 2023 13:05:09 GMT

To celebrate PEGS’ third birthday, we’ve reached out to a host of businesses who’ve kindly donated prizes to help us raise funds.

All money collected from the raffle will be used to provide services for parents and caregivers who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse. We are committed to ensuring this support remains free for all parents, regardless of their financial situation, forever – and that’s why donations are so important to us.

How can you enter the raffle?

To enter the raffle, simply click here . Donate £2 for every raffle ticket you’d like to purchase, and ensure you give us your name and contact number so we can let you know if you’re a winner (and get your prize to you).

The raffle will be drawn during our birthday event on the evening of 23 ^rd March.

And what could you win?

The prizes include:

A spa day for two at Bannatyne Spa Shrewsbury

A month’s membership at Bright Star Boxing Academy (Shifnal)

One round of golf and one round of foot-golf at The Castle Golf and Leisure (Stafford)

A goody-bag and book from JoJo Smith at Creativ Sas

Hamper from Elite Hampers

Workshop place and copy of Your Child is Not Broken by Heidi Mavir

A play pass from The Ice Cream Farm

A thirty-second advert for your business on InTune Radio

Two tickets for a one-hour open jump at Jump In Shrewsbury

A self-care hamper from The Kintsugi Collective

A one-to-one workshop and book from Prash Sharma aka The Heartbreak Healer

A football shirt signed by the players from Shrewsbury Town FC

£25 gift voucher for Timberjacks Axe Throwing (Shrewsbury)

£20 gift voucher for Wetherspoon

Artwork to honour a treasured pet from Where Angels Tread

Please purchase your tickets before 5pm on Wednesday 22 ^nd March to ensure you’re entered into the draw!

Guest Blog: The Heartbreak Healer

Tue, 14 Feb 2023 11:42:43 GMT

Here at PEGS, we know celebrations can be a particular struggle for families who aren't living in a picture-perfect idealised world. Valentine's may be tricky for you - surrounded by hearts, chocolates and flowers, when the reality behind closed doors is a struggle.

So we're really pleased that friend of PEGS, Prash Sharma AKA The Heartbreak Healer, has written this fantastic blog to mark Valentine's Day. Prash has made it her life's mission to rebrand 'happy ever after' and ensure everyone understands a happy relationship begins and ends with a happy self.

Prash's focus is on those who are single this February 14th, but all of her points around self care can be applied to parents who are experiencing CPA too, so please do read on and then go and show Prash some love via her social media, which is linked at the end!

The Dark Side of Valentine's Day: Beyond the Commercialized Façade of Love

Just like every other celebration, Valentine's Day has also become highly commercialised, with companies pushing expensive gifts, romantic vacations, and fancy meals.

Everything is about profit these days – no matter the cost!

The pressure to show love and affection through consumerism has taken away from the true essence of the day, which is about celebrating and appreciating the relationships that matter the most – the love we have for us and for others!

Valentine's Day is often portrayed as a day for couples because our society puts a strong emphasis on 'being in a relationship'. This is the same society that looks down on single parents and judges every broken relationship with contempt.

Now can you imagine the stress and the pressure that this day puts on someone single – someone who is already feeling fragile?

Is it any wonder that every step you take, as a single woman, a single parent, or recently single, you feel like the biggest failure in this world? With all these messages about 'true love and celebrating love' bombarding you from every single direction – they don’t even give you a chance.

You see, if you are single and happy being who you are… if you accept yourself just the way you are, a lot of companies will go bankrupt, and they cannot let that happen.

There is too much at stake!

So how about we take back our power (it’s about time, don’t you think?) and we celebrate us this Valentine Day and beyond?

Let’s focus on self-care and self-love!

Aren’t they all singing from the hymn sheet that says, 'you cannot pour from an empty cup?'

It's time to break free from the pressure to be in a relationship on Valentine's Day (and every other holiday) and to celebrate the love that exists in all forms, including the love we have for ourselves.

Here are some ways to practice self-love and self-care:

· Treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Talk to yourself in a positive, encouraging way, and be gentle with yourself when things don't go as planned.

· Indulge in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether it's reading a book, taking a bath, or trying a new hobby, do something that you truly enjoy and that helps you to recharge.

· Spend time with people who uplift and support you. Surround yourself with friends and loved ones who make you feel good about yourself and avoid those who bring you down.

· Practice gratitude and positive self-talk. Focus on the things in your life that you are thankful for and remind yourself of your strengths and accomplishments.

· Take care of your physical health. Exercise regularly, eat well, and get enough sleep. By taking care of your body, you'll be better equipped to handle life's challenges and to feel good about yourself.

· Volunteer or give back: every day is a great opportunity to show love to others by volunteering or giving back to your community. This can be a rewarding way to shift your focus away from yourself and feel good by helping others.

· Focus on self-love: Take some time to reflect on your own self-worth and all the things that make you special. Write down affirmations and read them every day to boost your self-confidence and self-esteem.

Remember, self-care is personal, and what works for one person may not work for another.

The key is to find activities that you enjoy and that make you feel good. Whether it's trying something new or sticking with a tried-and-true self-care routine, make sure to prioritize self-care and invest time in yourself.

Valentine's Day is just one day of the year, and it doesn't define your worth or happiness – what defines and determines who you are is the love you show yourself.

From my heart to yours… Happy Self-Love Day!

With infinite love and gratitude,

Prash xoxo

The Heartbreak Healer

You can connect with Prash here:

Website | Instagram | Facebook | LinkedIn | TikTok

Meet the PEGS team: Georgia

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 01 Feb 2023 15:25:05 GMT

There's an incredible team behind all that goes on at PEGS, so we thought we'd introduce you to them via a series of blogs.

Name: Georgia

Job title: CPA Practitioner

How long have you worked for PEGS? 3 months

Which office are you based at? Shrewsbury

What’s your favourite thing about working for PEGS? Knowing that by me speaking to these parents/carers, I have helped someone/made someone smile when life isn't so good for them right now.

What does a typical day involve? Speaking with parents/carers on the phone or by video. Admin/documenting all of the information I have taken from that call or contacting new parents/carers. Running drop in sessions on our scheduled days and catching up/checking in with colleagues.

How do you think (or hope) your colleagues would describe you? Oh dear...helpful and there if needed.

When you were younger, what job did you want to do as grown up? Police Officer

A little bit about you: I live with my mum and dad. Outside of work, I enjoy spending time with them, my sister and my boyfriend. I also enjoy going to the gym, long walks and seeing my friends.

Which book, film and album would you take to a desert island with you? Oooh, this is hard, I don't really read but I would take The Greatest Showman film. Again, I listen to all sorts of music so hard to answer that too.

Our parent survey: the background and hoped outcomes

Wed, 25 Jan 2023 10:35:18 GMT

This week, PEGS released its second annual parent survey . The responses are submitted anonymously online by parents who are experiencing CPA and, to the best of our knowledge, are the largest surveys of their kind undertaken to date in the UK. Each survey was completed by roughly 200 parents or caregivers – meaning while the experiences described by the respondents won’t be reflective of every single person’s experience of CPA, they do give us a good insight into the types of behaviour happening, professional support sought and the impact upon households.

What’s the purpose of the survey?

Knowledge is crucial if we’re able to build up an effective network of support systems for parents, carers and guardians . Alongside the vital research being undertaken by academics in the UK and beyond, PEGS has supported a large number of parents over the last three years and so we’re able to reach out to those people in order to gather information about their experiences.

The surveys add to the existing range of research and statistics, and help us develop a more accurate picture of Child to Parent Abuse and its impacts. As well as being able to present the report to frontline professionals and decision-makers, we also carefully analyse the responses to ensure the services PEGS offers are in-line with what parents are telling us they need.

What do we ask and why?

The survey broadly seeks to ascertain information about the household demographics, the types of behaviours being experienced and who they are displayed towards (for example, siblings and pets as well as parental figures), and about the child themselves.

We ask how old the child was when the parent felt their behaviours escalated beyond ‘typical’ challenging or boundary-pushing into CPA.

This helps us evidence the need for support for all parents no matter the age of their child, and also shows us how long before some families seek support. To bolster our knowledge about this, we also ask parents to tell us how much time elapsed before they reached out to a professional.

And that’s because in an ideal world parents would feel able to seek outside assistance as soon as they felt they needed to, and any professional they approached – a teacher, GP, social worker etc – would be equipped with the knowledge and ability to respond appropriately and effectively, so that support was put in place for that parent.

We enquire about the impact upon the parent, from a social, health, and career perspective, and we also ask which professionals they’ve been in contact with and how supported they felt. It’s important for us to understand who families are likely to approach, so that we can concentrate on upskilling those people. Responses about how supported they felt help us to understand what parents are asking for, and how to bridge the gap between what’s on offer currently and what the ideal situation would be for those families seeking assistance.

What do we hope will happen?

We hope the survey will prove insightful for professionals, help inform decision making going forward, evidence the need for joined-up support and effective CPA policies, and help raise more awareness of CPA.

Because waiting months or years to seek help only to find inadequacies or a lack of understanding within the system isn’t okay. Being blamed for behaviours you are experiencing isn’t okay. And the more of us who are aware of the reality for many thousands of parents in the UK today, the more we can do to call for better support.

Parent survey reveals extent and impact of CPA

Mon, 23 Jan 2023 09:25:03 GMT

PEGS has revealed the results of its second parent survey, undertaken in the latter part of 2022.

The report, which you can download below, shows the types of abuse being experienced in households where CPA is occurring, its impact on parents, and the level of professional support people feel they are receiving.

We have also released the following in relation to our findings:

A quarter of parents experiencing abuse from their own child say the violent, harmful or coercive behaviours began before the age of six.

Despite a commonly-held misconception that teenagers are responsible for the majority of Child to Parent Abuse cases, this is the second year in a row that a survey undertaken by social enterprise PEGS revealed many parents experiencing physical, verbal or other forms of abuse when their child was five or younger.

There has been an increase in awareness around this form of domestic abuse in recent years – with the PEGS team working with more than 3,000 parents across the UK and training hundreds of frontline professionals.

As part of their efforts to educate decision-makers and shine a light on Child to Parent Abuse, the team asked parents to share an insight into the behaviours they’re experiencing, the impact of these behaviours, and what type of professional support they’ve requested.

The Winter 2022 survey (the second of its kind run by PEGS) showed a worrying two thirds of parents have had to call the police to de-escalate at least one incident (a rise from 57% in the previous year’s survey), and a quarter have called police at least five times because of fears over their safety.

Child to Parent Abuse can take many forms including physical, verbal, economic, digital, and coercion. Traditionally, this type of domestic abuse was thought to be most prevalent among teenagers – but research and anecdotal evidence now shows abuse is more likely to start earlier on in life, and there are also a proportion of adult offspring (18+) abusing their parents.

Other findings from the anonymous survey included:

· More than half of parents report being physically attacked at least once a week.

· 74% of working parents have had to reduce their hours or leave work altogether because of the abuse they are experiencing at home.

· 30% changed their mind about contacting a professional in case their other children were taken away.

· Sexualised behaviours (including using explicit language) are being experienced by 17% of respondents.

· 13% of children have tried to strangle or suffocate another child living in the home.

· Almost half of respondents struggled with abuse for at least three years before seeking outside help.

· 68% didn’t feel they received the help they needed when they contacted a professional.

What is a social enterprise?

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 10 Jan 2023 09:25:06 GMT

PEGS is very proud to be one of 100,000 social enterprises in the UK.

Despite their prevalence, it’s a type of business model which some people haven’t necessarily heard of before. They became more prominent (and a distinct type of business, some would say) in the 1970s, although they have been around in more informal terms for many hundreds of years.

In fact, it’s believed the very first social entrepreneur was a 14th century African ruler called Mansa Musa who used the funds he got through trading to fund community projects like building schools and libraries.

Social enterprises are unlike traditional businesses because their profits are invested back into the organisation. So, when it comes to PEGS, any income from our professional and training consultancy work goes towards our operating costs (paying staff, office costs etc) and then the remaining money goes to fund our parent services. This is why we don’t charge parents for access to drop-ins, workshops, one to ones or any other support that we offer them.

And the reason they’re called ‘social’ enterprises? Because their mission is to improve society or to impact change, which is exactly the reason why PEGS is one – we’re all about purpose, not profit!

It’s important to clarify that we are not a charity – again, it can be confusing because people see us championing a good cause and putting our income to good use to deliver services, and think it sounds like a charity!

But we are not registered with the Charity Commission, and are not bound by Charity Law. While these organisations tend to bring in money via fundraising, social enterprises also tend to sell products or services. Being a social enterprise tends to give a little more flexibility in that sense – which is why we are able to offer paid-for training and consultancy, alongside applying for specific grants, and still having the option of direct donations from our supporters.

PEGS appears on Locally Made podcast

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 07 Jan 2023 16:22:24 GMT

This week, PEGS founder Michelle John featured on the Locally Made podcast - listen in here!

PEGS commits to supporting older workforce

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 22 Dec 2022 14:01:11 GMT

PEGS has committed to an age-friendly approach to employment by signing up to a national pledge.

The Age-friendly Employer Pledge has been launched by the Centre for Ageing Better in a bid to ensure those in their 50s and 60s don’t face barriers when it comes to getting back into or continuing their career.

The Centre for Ageing Better is a charitable foundation funded by the National Lottery Community Fund which focuses on ensuring the reality of ageing is better for everyone – looking at everything from challenging ageism to ensuring the UK’s homes are suitable for the growing older population.

As part of this, they’ve conducted research into the job market, finding that – despite there being a real skill and labour shortage right now – older workers are still being overlooked and many feel they face prejudice.

In fact, more than a third of 50 to 70 year olds (36%) feel at a disadvantage applying for jobs due to their age – even though they make up a third of England’s entire workforce (nearly 9 million workers are 50 or over).

Being part of the nationwide programme means we will be actively looking at ways to improve the recruitment, retention and development of staff aged 50 or over. This means ensuring job adverts are worded to be inclusive of everyone regardless of their age, our diversity and inclusion policies take age into account, and that we recognise older workers may be disadvantaged when it comes to searching for a job if they have to detail every job they’ve had since leaving school.

The Centre for Ageing Better also encourages employers to recognise just how beneficial having older workers within their team can be – not only has research shown this can improve productivity, but there are also benefits surrounding intergenerational sharing of skills and knowledge.

You can find out more about the pledge here .

The financial impacts of CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 09 Dec 2022 10:33:29 GMT

When we think of abuse, it’s perhaps the physical and emotional impacts which spring to mind initially. But there are often a whole range of effects – and it’s important, especially during the current cost of living crisis, to be aware of the many ways in which Child to Parent Abuse can have a negative impact on people’s financial situations.

Firstly, there may be direct financially or economically abusive behaviours being displayed. These could include:

Stealing items from the parent or the household. Our 2021 PEGS parent survey saw 39% of parents report their child had stolen from them, and 24% felt they were experiencing financial abuse.
Coercing the parent into handing over money, or purchasing items for them. 88% have experienced threats and 77% intimidation (about anything, not just money).
Fraudulently taking out credit cards or other accounts in their parent’s name.

Then there’s the cost associated with:

Replacing damaged items or property.
Potentially having to seek legal support if the situation escalates.
Even having to move house. 7% have been threatened with eviction or needed to move because of CPA.
Having to reduce hours or quit work altogether. Of PEGS parents who were previously employed, 48% had to reduce their hours, and 22% left their job totally .

If you’re experiencing increased money worries as a result of Child to Parent Abuse, or direct financial/economic abuse from your child, then there are a range of organisations out there who can support you:

Citizens Advice

Money Advice Plus

Money Helper

National Centre for Domestic Violence financial abuse toolkit

National Domestic Abuse Helpline

0808 2000 247 (24-hour)

Surviving Economic Abuse

0808 196 8845 (Monday-Friday 9am to 1pm and 2pm to 5pm, free)

UK Finance

And many banks now have specialist teams who can provide support to those affected by financial abuse. Here are some of the larger banks – if yours isn’t on the list then do check directly with them to see how they may be able to support you.

Barclays

Fill in the form to let their team know when they can contact you.

Halifax

0800 0854 475 (Monday – Friday 8am to 6pm)

HSBC

03457 404 404

Lloyds

0800 0665 703 (Monday – Friday 8am to 6pm)

Nationwide

0800 917 23 93 (Monday – Friday 9am to 5pm, Saturday 9am to 1pm)

Natwest

03457 888 444 (8am to 8pm)

Royal Bank of Scotland

03457 24 24 24 (8am to 8pm)

Santander

0800 011 3414

Global gold prize for PEGS founder

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 15 Nov 2022 12:00:59 GMT

A campaigner supporting thousands of parents impacted by abuse has won an international award.

Michelle John, founder of the social enterprise PEGS, was the only person in the world to be awarded gold in the Woman of the Year – Government or Non Profit category at the Stevie Awards for Women in Business 2022.

The results were announced in Las Vegas over the weekend – each winner is categorised as a gold, silver or bronze recipient based on the amount of points awarded by a panel of esteemed judges.

Michelle attracted their attention for the work she’s been undertaking to raise awareness of Child to Parent Abuse, as well as supporting impacted parents and caregivers, training professionals, and helping develop regional and national policies.

Having registered the social enterprise, which has offices in Shropshire and Derbyshire but operates across the UK, in November 2019, Michelle launched its first services the following March. The team has now helped more than 3,000 parents as well as working with statutory, voluntary and private organisations to help upskill, share knowledge and raise the profile of this little-known form of abuse.

One judge pointed out: “It’s important to remember that all of this has been achieved since launching services in March 2020, against the backdrop of a global pandemic, reduced grants and funding available for the third sector, and a generally difficult time with the economy and business world.”

Others highlighted that PEGS was an ‘excellent initiative’, named Michelle as a ‘big influencer’, called her work ‘outstanding’ and her accomplishments ‘extraordinary’. While another of the judges said the founder embodied the saying ‘be the change you want to see’.

Michelle said she was thrilled to receive the award, the first international accolade picked up by the social enterprise, adding that she wanted to thank her team, partner agencies and everyone who had supported PEGS over the last three years.

“Winning this award sees Child to Parent Abuse being highlighted on the global stage, and I’m thrilled that this potentially means more professionals being aware of CPA and conscious of how they can support families experiencing it. It also hopefully means fewer parents feel alone and isolated, because they know there are organisations out there set up to support them, and they know CPA is finally getting the recognition the issue needs.”

More must be done to support kinship carers

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 20 Oct 2022 13:03:07 GMT

The vital role of kinship carers has been in the spotlight this week.

MP Munira Wilson led a debate in the House of Commons about the need for additional support for individuals such as grandparents or aunts and uncles who step up to look after a child if their biological parents are unable to.

Ms Wilson said, given the Government was set to respond to the independent review of children’s social care in the next two months, it was a ‘pivotal moment to recognise and unlock the role that family and friends can play in raising children who would otherwise be brought up in care.’

The financial pressures faced by those become kinship carers was highlighted, such as the average of £5,000 for legal costs alone (which around 40% of families do not receive any help with).

It’s estimated to cost £72,500 per year for a local authority to look after a child in care, compared to the £37,000 it would cost to provide a weekly allowance and a social worker for a kinship carer – essentially representing a saving of more than £35,000.

“Despite the fact that we hear all of those statistics, which show better outcomes for children looked after by people who know them, kinship care is the Cinderella service of our social care system. It is less well understood than foster care, despite there being double the number of children in kinship care than there are in foster care. Kinship carers also receive only a fraction of the support received

by foster carers or adoptive parents.

“That is why I introduced my Kinship Care Bill in July, which calls for kinship carers to be provided with three types of support, to put them on a par with the support that foster carers and adoptive carers receive. It proposes that kinship carers are provided with a weekly allowance, at the same level as the allowance for foster carers; it would give kinship carers the right to paid leave when a child starts living with them; and it would provide extra educational support for children in kinship care, by giving them pupil premium funding, and priority for their first choice of school, as which looked-after receive.”

MP Andrew Gwynne, himself a kinship carer alongside his wife for their grandson, called for ‘better access to information, support networks and support services’.

He added: “Make no mistake: empowering kinship care has benefits far beyond improving the lives of children and those who care for them. The charity Kinship estimates that for every reduction of 1,000 in the number of children looked after in local authority care, up to £40 million is saved. Put simply, the moral benefits of supporting kinship care are matched by the economic case for supporting kinship care.”

MP Kelly Tolhurt, the Minister of State for Schools and Childhood, agreed kinship carers played a vital role, adding: “It is clear that more needs to be done to build a system in which every child’s right to a family is safeguarded. We must give all children an opportunity to grow up in a loving kinship home when that is in their best interests and when they cannot be safely looked after by their parents.

“I recognise the strain that kinship families are under, and will continue to work collaboratively with local areas to ensure that children, young people and families have access to the support they need to respond to the cost of living pressures.”

To view a transcription of the debate, click here .

PEGS launches successful CPA Awareness Day

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 15 Oct 2022 15:20:50 GMT

The first ever Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day saw thousands across the UK finding out more about this often-hidden form of abuse.

Launched by social enterprise PEGS, the day on Friday 14 ^th October aimed to improve knowledge about CPA while also sharing information with parents, carers and guardians about where they could go to get support.

PEGS hosted their own event to mark the day at Shrewsbury College in Shropshire, with professionals from across the Midlands and beyond attending, alongside long-time supporters of PEGS.

And the PEGS team also encouraged the use of the hashtag #CPAAwarenessDay across social media, with hundreds of posts reaching many thousands of Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and Twitter users.

Founding Director Michelle John said: “We’re absolutely thrilled about how the Awareness Day went, and it’s definitely something we will be hosting annually from now on.

“It was fantastic to see the in-person support for the event, and the online support from across the UK. A huge thank you to those who took part, and to Shrewsbury Colleges Group – in particular, Michelle Dawes – for hosting us.”

The event also saw PEGS launch CPA Heroes – which enables parents to nominate someone who has gone above and beyond to assist them. This can either be a professional such as a GP, social worker, police officer or teacher, or a friend, family member, neighbour or colleague.

Visit this blog to find out more about nominating.

To catch up on all the action on social media, you can find PEGS on Facebook , Twitter , Instagram and LinkedIn .

Nominate your CPA Hero

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 15 Oct 2022 11:38:52 GMT

Those going above and beyond to support parents experiencing Child to Parent Abuse are set to be recognised.

During the first ever CPA Awareness Day on Friday (14 ^th October), PEGS Founding Director Michelle John announced the launch of our ‘CPA Heroes’.

She said: “We’re working hard to improve professional responses to CPA as well as public knowledge, and as part of that we wanted to highlight the incredible kindness, support and care being offered all around the UK.

“It could be that a family has come into contact with a professional who’s done everything they can to be there for them – a GP, social worker, police officer or teacher for example.

“But equally your CPA Hero could be a fantastic friend, family member, neighbour or colleague.

“CPA Heroes is not only about giving our heartfelt thanks to those people, but also to demonstrate that there are fantastic individuals out there who go above and beyond in either a personal or professional capacity.

“We’re really looking forward to seeing the nominations that come in, and we’ll also be getting together as a team to discuss who we’d like to put forward – so winners will either be a CPA Hero as voted for by PEGS parents or by PEGS professionals.

“We’re hoping to get a fantastic response and, if so, will look to make this an annual event to ensure we continue to give thanks to the wonderful people out there making a difference to families experiencing Child to Parent Abuse.”

Nominations are now until 5pm on Wednesday 30 ^th November – entries should be emailed to admin@pegsupport.com and should include the name, organisation (if applicable) and address (if known) of the nominee, plus the reason you’re nominating them. Please also indicate if you’re happy for the CPA Hero to be notified of your name (we won’t make this information public).

Please note, PEGS staff cannot be included in the CPA Heroes nominations.

PEGS opens second office

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 26 Sep 2022 09:54:48 GMT

Our new Derbyshire office was officially opened on Friday 23rd September. Thank you to everyone who attended!

PEGS invited professionals to join them at the launch of their Derbyshire office which was made possible thanks to a grant from the National Lottery Community Fund.

As well as providing a second base for staff to work from, the office will also enable PEGS to deepen its links with organisations within the county.

The social enterprise helps parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse by providing a range of services including virtual drop-ins, bespoke workshops and programmes, a peer support group, one to ones and advocacy.

In addition, PEGS runs specialised training for frontline professionals such as social care teams, police forces and schools, provides consultancy services to develop regional and national policies, and raises awareness of this type of abuse – which isn’t well known despite being estimated to impact upwards of 3% of UK households.

Founding Director Michelle John said: “I’d like to say a huge thank you to those who attended on Friday – there was a fantastic atmosphere in the office as everyone made new connections, took the time to extend their knowledge about CPA, and reflected on our PEGS journey so far.

“I founded PEGS with the aim of parents having somewhere and someone to turn to when they were going through Child to Parent Abuse – as sadly, there seemed to be a real lack of support. So, I simply can’t put into words how fantastic it is to see the organisation grow as it has. It’s of course incredibly sad that so many people are living through this type of abuse, but I’m so proud that the PEGS team is able to be there for them in their time of need.”

Michelle shares her stance on lived experience boundaries

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 22 Sep 2022 16:39:22 GMT

Sharing your lived experience was the topic of a webinar our founder Michelle John was asked to speak at today (Thursday).

Organised by Pioneers Post and attended by representatives from social enterprises across the UK and beyond, the event highlighted how choosing whether to disclose our lived experience – and how much detail to share – was personal to every single one of us.

First to speak was the incredible Leigh Carey, CEO and founder of The Hummingbird Project in Northern Ireland.

Leigh and her team work with people to give them the skills and expertise to stay well, as well as identifying stressors early and either managing their own mental wellbeing or asking for help.

She said disclosing her own experience of mental ill health enabled her to be her ‘authentic self’ within meetings but said it was important to consider the benefits – both to yourself and to those you’re talking to – of sharing specific details.

Considering how relevant your personal experiences were and how safe you feel sharing them was important, Leigh said. She also highlighted how a mix of experience was needed around every table – whether the person had lived, learned or practice experience.

Michelle then talked about deciding on boundaries (in terms of what information you shared or did not share) and making those clear from the offset. But, she highlighted, choosing not to disclose personal information wouldn’t necessarily impact the attention a social enterprise received from the media. Indeed, PEGS had been lucky to work alongside journalists from the likes of Channel 5 and ITV News who had been incredibly sensitive and respectful in how they covered a story about Child to Parent Abuse.

She added: “Those experiences do not define who you are. You define who you are. Perhaps people will question and ask ‘who are you to’ but the question is ‘who are you not to!’ You’re not doing it for people who don’t believe you, or don’t believe in you. You’re doing it for the ones who desperately need you.

“You don’t need to justify why you don’t share details. No is a complete sentence.”

Visit https://www.pioneerspost.com/ to see the latest news from the social enterprise magazine!

Research highlights abuse by adult offspring

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 20 Sep 2022 08:32:57 GMT

We’re proud to have a range of experts on our board, including Thien Trang Nguyen Phan who has an incredible wealth of knowledge about Child to Parent Abuse.

As part of her doctoral studies, Thien Trang completed a thesis on parents who were being abused by their adult (over 18) children – which is now available to read online .

Please note, the content of the thesis could be triggering so please only read it if you feel able to – it includes many extracts of interviews with mothers detailing their abuse.

Explaining the focus of her research, Thien Trang said over 12 years of professional experience, she had been ‘increasingly troubled by the lack of research, knowledge base, and practice guidance and tools relating to abuse of parents by their adult children’.

This type of abuse had been included in the more general definition of domestic abuse until 2021, and she highlights the fact that most tools (such as DASH and MARAC) are geared towards intimate partner abuse – alongside specialist services being ‘better equipped’ at supporting younger victims.

The research sets out to answer three core questions:

How do mothers articulate their experience of abuse by their adult children?

What factors influence mothers’ help-seeking and access to support?

What does effective support look like for mothers experiencing abuse from their adult children?

It’s worth noting that it wasn’t originally intended to be gender specific, but the 11 parents who came forward to bravely share their experiences with Thien Trang were all mothers, which is why the questions are geared towards female parents.

After sharing some of the abusive behaviours the mothers had detailed in their interviews with her, she goes on to say:

“Beyond the physical and emotional exhaustion, the constant walking on eggshells, and the costs to their health…mothers’ narratives revealed a consuming struggle for meaning in a world turned upside down. This struggle for meaning was deeply embedded in mothers’ experiences of the mother-child relationship.

“Indeed, for mothers, the abuse was not just an attack against them as persons, but fundamentally an attack against this relationship. Because of its unique nature, mothers articulated their experiences of the abuse in a visceral, almost physical way, as an attack against the connectedness and intimacy of the maternal bond. They were subsequently left with a sense of shock and repulsion as they saw their children turn against them and against their maternal bodies.

“Consequently, mothers experienced a triple stigma: the ‘double stigma’ of parenting a problematic child and of being a victim of domestic abuse…was further complicated by their ‘spoiled identities’ as mothers.”

As a result of her research, Thien Trang makes a number of recommendations for change at the end of her thesis. These include that the term ‘child to parent abuse’ should encompass adult offspring too, that professionals should be specifically trained in this type of abuse, that professionals recognise the mother-child relationship when dealing with this type of abuse, and that support should be flexible and take into account the nature of this relationship.

To read the full thesis, simply click here .

Domestic abuse award nomination from Clear Path UK

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 14 Sep 2022 09:25:04 GMT

Our founder Michelle is delighted to have been shortlisted for a domestic abuse award , alongside a host of amazing campaigners and advocates.

Michelle is in the running for the Clear Path UK Change Maker Award, alongside Sharon Livermore of Sharon’s Policy ; Kerry, Sara and Lucy of Moving Forward Lincoln ; Pat Craven of the Freedom Programme ; and Dani Wallace of the Fly Anyway Foundation (anyone who attended the PEGS CPA Conference earlier this year will remember Dani as the fantastic event host!).

Other categories include Innovative Excellence, Cycle Breaker, Diamond Heart and Outstanding Advocate – the latter of which MP Jess Phillips has been nominated for (Jess kindly contributed to our very first virtual event, Progressing PEGS, back in October 2021).

The winners will be announced at the Clear Path UK Conference on 7 ^th October at PwC headquarters in Watford – a day which is set to include a host of amazing speakers, a celebrity host, and live entertainment.

Clear Path UK Coalition is a community interest company that provides resources to professionals and organisations dealing with domestic abuse, as well as offering free access to support services for those who’ve experienced abuse.

Michelle said: “I’m absolutely thrilled to have been shortlisted for the Clear Path UK Change Maker Award. The finalists are a group of fantastic individuals who work tirelessly to improve services and outcomes for those who have experienced domestic abuse.

“As the founder of an organisation which focuses on a type of domestic abuse which has traditionally remained hidden, it’s always incredible to receive an award nomination – as this raises awareness of Child to Parent Abuse among a whole new group of people.

“I’d encourage everyone to take a look at the campaigns of the finalists, because they are doing such incredible work and influencing real change in the world, bettering life for a group of people who desperately need access to improved services, more support, and advocates on their side.”

PEGS reaches second level of disability careers scheme

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 02 Sep 2022 08:39:44 GMT

A few months ago, we announced we’d signed up to the Government’s Disability Confident scheme.

Now, we’re delighted to share that we have reached Level 2, meaning we can proudly call ourselves a Disability Confident Employer.

The scheme aims to support organisations to attract, recruit, retain and develop the careers of disabled people in the workplace.

It enables employers like PEGS to increase our understanding of different disabilities and how opportunities may be restricted for those who have these conditions – plus of course, supporting us to remove barriers which might be preventing people who are disabled or have long-term health conditions from accessing employment.

In order to reach Disability Confident Employer status, we had to undertake a self-assessment, and focus on a number of actions around attracting the right people to the organisation – and then retaining and developing them.

We’ll now be looking to work towards the third and final level of the scheme: Disability Confident Leader.

Our Founding Director Michelle John said: “Having a disability or long-term condition shouldn’t stop a person from accessing the career they want and achieving their goals.

“We always aim to be inclusive in everything we do here at PEGS, but have embraced the opportunity to become involved in the Department for Work and Pensions’ Disability Confident Scheme in order to have that additional guidance around how we can proactively support disabled people in the workplace.

“We’d encourage all employers to think about join the scheme, as together we can make a real difference in getting rid of the barriers to employment.”

For more information about becoming Disability Confident, simply click here .

PEGS named in the SmallBiz100

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 27 Aug 2022 08:42:09 GMT

We are delighted to have been included in this year’s SmallBiz100 .

PEGS is one of the names on the list of inspiring organisations from across the UK, released as part of a wider campaign to encourage people to support businesses in their local community.

Campaign founders will be highlighting the 100 chosen firms in the run-up to Small Business Saturday (3 ^rd December).

PEGS aims to reduce the impact of Child to Parent Abuse by supporting parents, carers and guardians; training frontline professionals; influencing regional and national policy; and raising awareness.

The social enterprise became operational in spring 2020, and has its headquarters in Shrewsbury – with a second office opening this autumn in Derbyshire.

Michelle John, Founding Director of PEGS, said she fully supported the ‘shop local’ message and had tried to incorporate this into the running of the social enterprise where possible.

“We try to partner with other small businesses local to us, choosing Shropshire-based companies for our PR and website for example. When we’re hosting events, our first port of call is always to explore which local businesses might be able to supply the products and services we need.

“We’re thrilled to be included in the SmallBiz100 among some wonderful small businesses from across the UK – we’re not necessarily the first organisation people would think of when they hear the word ‘business’ but we operate in much6 the same way as an independent store on the high street. The differences are that we’re offering services rather than products, and we apply for grants to cover the costs of running these services, while also generating income from the professional training we run.”

Michelle Ovens CBE, Director of Small Business Saturday UK, added: “It’s fantastic to celebrate small firms just like PEGS as part of our 10-year anniversary of the campaign.

“Over the past decade, we have been able to spotlight dynamic businesses from across the nation, who remind us of the incredible tenacity and determination of small firms in this country.”

Commissioner publishes initial findings from Domestic Abuse survey

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 17 Aug 2022 08:09:10 GMT

The Domestic Abuse Commissioner , Nicole Jacobs, has this week published the early findings from a survey which aimed to map out the services available across England and Wales.

More than 500 organisations and 4,000 individuals responded to a request for information – culminating in the findings which will be followed up by a full report in the autumn.

The report can be read here , and some of the key findings are as follows:

Two thirds of those who accessed specialist domestic abuse services felt safer as a result.
Almost three quarters felt more in control of their lives after seeking specialist support.
Community-based support was sought after, to include advocacy, counselling, therapeutic support, helpline advice and mental health care.
Fewer than half of those experiencing domestic abuse were able to access the support they wanted.

The Commissioner has called for a ‘significant funding injection’ which focuses on ‘the greatest gaps in provision, by type of organisation, intervention, and regionally’ and ‘by and for services’.

And the report also states: “The Victims Bill represents too good an opportunity to pass up. It is critical that we come together to understand the problem we are faced with and develop robust, evidence-based solutions to truly transform the response to domestic abuse and end the postcode lottery.

“We hope that by publishing this information as early as possible, we are supporting those who might support and scrutinise the Bill to make it as ambitious as it can be. The 2.3 million people who experience domestic abuse every year deserve nothing less.”

Dyfed Powys parents to benefit from PCC funding

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 04 Aug 2022 09:54:45 GMT

PEGS is set to provide more support for those experiencing Child to Parent Abuse in Dyfed Powys.

The Police and Crime Commissioner for the area, which includes Carmarthenshire, Ceredigion, Pembrokeshire and Powys, has secured £271,000 of extra funding from the Ministry of Justice to share among support services for domestic abuse and sexual violence.

Dafydd Llywelyn has pledged to split the funding between ourselves and a number of other organisations ( AAFDA , Calan DVS , Carmarthen Domestic Abuse Services Ltd , Pembrokeshire People First , Dewis Choice , Goleudy , and Bawso ), as well as awarding additional money secured for a Children’s Independent Sexual Violence Advisor to New Pathways .

Announcing the news, the PCC said Dyfed Powys Police had identified a ‘significant amount of resourcing’ was needed to address the safeguarding demand, particularly around domestic abuse.

“As a result, it is a responsibility of mine to ensure there are appropriate services available to meet the needs of all victims, and that we prioritise investment in services for victims of serious sexual offences.

“I am pleased to have been able to secure this additional funding from the Ministry of Justice, that will increase and strengthen the support services available.”

The portion of the funding received by PEGS will be used to provide one to one support, virtual drop-in sessions and our bespoke programmes and workshops for parents, carers and guardians within the region who are affected by CPA.

Welcoming the announcement, our Founding Director Michelle John said: “Thank you to the PCC Dafydd Llywelyn and his team for recognising how crucial it is to support those experiencing domestic abuse and sexual violence, and for recognising the significant portion of people for whom Child to Parent Abuse is a daily reality.

“This issue has a huge impact on individuals, families and communities, and we’re pleased to work alongside the PCC to provide the desperately-needed support that parents are seeking.”

Join in CPA Awareness Day!

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 22 Jul 2022 13:20:06 GMT

This autumn will mark the very first Child to Parent Abuse Awareness Day. On Friday 14th October, we’d love you to join us in a nationwide push to raise awareness of CPA and to campaign for more support for the families this issue impacts.

How can you help?

Any action big or small will help us to make CPA Awareness Day a success – simply pick one (or more) of the following, and support PEGS in making a difference to parents whose lives are profoundly affected by CPA.

Host an event – a drop-in session, a coffee morning, the event can take any format you like. All we ask is that you let us know about it by emailing admin@pegsupport.com with the subject line 'CPA Awareness Day': if it’s a closed event then please just let us know the name of your organisation and what you’ll be doing. If it’s a public event, then we can share the time and location on our website to encourage more people to attend. Plus, we’ll send you a virtual pack of Awareness Day resources.

Share on social media – we’ll be using the hashtag #CPAAwarenessDay across social media, so do get involved and either create your own post or share some of ours.

And if you'd like a Facebook profile picture frame created for you to mark the day, please simply message us on our Facebook page and our Social Media Manager will be happy to help!

Have a conversation – there are many people out there who either haven’t heard of CPA, or know little about it. By having a conversation with a friend, family member or colleague, you’ve helped raise awareness. Simple, but effective.

Contact a professional – why not write to your local council leader to ask if their social care team has had CPA training yet? Or send a letter to your MP highlighting why CPA should be on their agenda going forward?

Thank you in advance for your support – and we look forward to you joining us to highlight CPA Awareness Day on 14th October!

PEGS supports DWP domestic abuse Covenant event

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 22 Jul 2022 13:06:36 GMT

PEGS was delighted to be asked to attend an EDAC event with the Department for Work and Pensions.

EDAC is the Employers Domestic Abuse Covenant – aiming to ensure those who have experienced domestic abuse are supported to enter or re-enter the workplace.

It’s spearheaded by the fantastic Polly Harrar – founder of the Sharan Project .

And it’s one of the main inspirations for our own Covenant (CPAC), which we launched in conjunction with the DWP last year. Our lead contacts Tony Hyland and Ahmed Bhayat have been heavily involved with EDAC which means they’ve been able to offer us expert advice and insight throughout the process of launching and rolling out our own Covenant.

Also in attendance to support the event were Julie Marson MP, the newly-appointed Parliamentary Under Secretary of State at the DWP, and Barbara Bradley, the Director General for Work and Health Services.

During the event, we heard from a panel of employers who have become more informed about domestic abuse thanks to EDAC, have been able to help employees experiencing abuse and have been able to provide more opportunities for women in the workplace.

Panellists included Anastasia Womack from Capgemini, Laura Roche from SCS Railways, Rachel Parker from Thames Valley Water, Dr Barbara van de Eecken from Babington, and Julian Sanz from EQUANS.

Our Founder Michelle said: “We were thrilled to be asked to support the event, which raised the profile of EDAC and the work the DWP does with employers around domestic abuse.

“There was an incredibly powerful talk from Nina Aouilk who spoke about her experiences of honour-based violence, domestic abuse, homelessness and employment. Her story is very moving and gave us all something to think about afterwards.

“It was fantastic to meet the employers, EDAC and DWP teams at the event – and a big thank you again, particularly to Tony, for our invite!”

If you’re an employer who hasn’t yet found out about our Covenant – the CPAC – do click here for all the information.

Welcoming the new Domestic Abuse Act guidance document

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 13 Jul 2022 09:26:47 GMT

A leading campaigner has spoken of her delight at the inclusion of Child to Parent Abuse within a newly-published document relating to the Domestic Abuse Act.

Shortly after launching PEGS, Michelle John was asked to support the Home Office as they prepared the statutory guidance which is linked to the 2021 Act and highlights best practice to organisations such as police forces, local authorities, schools and domestic abuse services.

This guidance was published on Friday (8 ^th July) – marking the first time that Child to Parent Abuse has been included in a Home Office document of this kind.

Michelle explains: “CPA has remained largely under-reported and under-recorded, meaning there’s a real lack of knowledge and understanding compared to intimate partner domestic abuse. That’s why it was so important to have CPA included in this document, which highlight best practice to organisations across England and Wales.

“Myself and the PEGS team are particularly thrilled to see the inclusion of a recommendation around the development of advocacy roles to support parents, carers and guardians – for example, during social care meetings. This is something that we have been offering for the last couple of years, so having this role officially recognised and encouraged as part of these documents is great news.

“This is a real step forward for the many thousands of parents experiencing Child to Parent Abuse – which is estimated to affect at least 3% of UK households.”

The document states CPA can involve children of all ages, including adult children. While there is no specific legal definition of CPA, it is ‘generally accepted to involve some of the patterns of behaviour that can be found in other relationship contexts’.

These can include humiliation, belittling language, violence and threats, jealous and controlling behaviours, damage to property, stealing and heightened sexualised behaviours.

It continues: “Like other forms of abuse, child-to-parent abuse is characterised by shame and stigma which could mean parents are less likely to report the abuse to the police. Parents may fear being blamed, disbelieved, or conversely having their child taken away from them or criminalised leaving them reluctant to seek help.

“Recorded incidents likely represent only a small number of real cases as families facing crisis point make the difficult decision to disclose their abuse. Victims of this type of abuse should also receive appropriate domestic abuse response and support.”

The document recommends professionals ‘recognise the dynamics, impact and risk’ when responding to CPA – including commissioning specialised local CPA services or embedding trained staff as part of a multi-agency referral system. It adds that the Home Office intends to publish updated CPA guidance later this year.

Click here to read the full document.

UnLtd funding to help PEGS deliver social change

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 09 Jul 2022 12:01:26 GMT

An organisation which supports social ventures has awarded a £15,000 grant to PEGS.

UnLtd focuses on assisting organisations to deliver social change within communities – working alongside partners from both the public and private sectors to help harness the potential of social entrepreneurs and working towards solving society’s biggest challenges.

They’ve been running since 2002 and in the intervening two decades have handed out more than 20,000 awards of support and funding.

The money will be used to help us develop the training we provide to professionals working with families impacted by CPA, to deepen their knowledge around the topic and to enable them to respond efficiently, effectively and empathetically when a disclosure is made, as well as more easily identifying where CPA may be an issue within a household.

In order to secure the grant, PEGS was asked to describe the scale of the impact CPA has upon society – we highlighted the physical and mental health impact upon individuals and families, the number of people forced to leave their job or reduce their hours as a result of the behaviours they are experiencing, and the impact upon siblings, pets and other members of the household.

We also shared the impact on frontline professionals – including GPS, schools, the criminal justice system, social care teams, and police forces.

“Much like intimate partner domestic abuse was years ago, CPA is largely hidden and will continue to have a huge impact unless more is done to fund research, support services and professional training.”

We're looking for extra staff!

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 07 Jul 2022 14:22:54 GMT

Thanks to the generosity of the National Lottery , we are able to expand our team and have a total of four roles available for professionals to apply for.

All roles are three-year fixed term contracts and all successful candidates will need to uphold our ethos and values – focusing on helping to support parents experiencing CPA.

There are two CPA Practitioner roles available – one part-time , and one full-time .

This role focuses on working directly with parents, whether that’s triaging new referrals, undertaking risk assessments, formulating safety plans, facilitating group sessions, or delivering programmes and workshops.

We’re looking for professionals who have relevant experience and are able to remain calm under pressure, communicate well, and self-motivate, as well as being highly organised.

The full-time role hours are 9am to 5pm on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays, 9am to 3.30pm on Wednesdays and 1.5 hours one evening per week.

The part-time role hours are 9am to 2.30pm and 7pm to 8pm on Tuesdays, 9am to 2.30pm on Wednesdays and Thursdays.

In addition, we’re looking for two part-time administrators who will support virtual workshops and programmes by answering queries throughout the sessions and sharing further information, manage company correspondence, process referrals, complete admin for workshops and programmes, and book and create itineraries for business trips, staff meetings and company events.

The hours for one role are 9am to 3.30pm on Mondays, 9am to 4pm on Tuesdays, and 9am to 5pm on Wednesdays.

The hours for the second role are 9am to 5pm on Wednesdays, 9am to 4pm on Thursdays, and 9am to 3.30pm on Fridays.

Please note all roles are for a three-year fixed term, and hours may be adjusted (with suitable notice) dependent on organisational needs.

More information about all of the roles, and a link to apply, can be found on Indeed . Alternatively, please email samantham@pegsupport.com to request an application form before the deadline of 22 ^nd July (We politely request no CVs are sent).

Two businesswomen awards finals for Michelle

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 07 Jul 2022 11:57:33 GMT

Our Founding Director has been named among top businesswomen in the finals of two prestigious awards.

Michelle John, who launched PEGS after her own experience of Child to Parent Abuse, is among seven women shortlisted in the Charity Champion category at the Best Businesswomen Awards .

They were founded in 2015 by entrepreneur Debbie Gilbert and cover all regions and industries – with money raised each year for the previous Charity Champion’s organisation.

Announcing the finalists, Debbie Gilbert said: “This is the 8th year of these prestigious awards, and despite the difficult circumstances business owners have faced, these businesswomen have shone through the dark times.

“Our judging panel, all business experts, were blown away by the quality of the entrants. All our finalists are all shining examples of being successful entrepreneurs who have proved their success to our judges.”

The winners will be revealed on the evening of 30 ^th September at the Gala Awards Final in Wembley.

Later in the year, Michelle will find out if she’s won a National Business Women’s Award .

She’s been shortlisted alongside seven others in the Business Hero category, having received enough votes from the public to reach the finals.

This category was the only one decided by vote – and was open to any business owner who’d gone above and beyond in the face of adversity.

The winners will be announced on 18 ^th November, again in Wembley.

It comes just a week after Michelle was shortlisted in the Midlands Entrepreneur for Good category at the Great British Entrepreneur Awards.

She said: “I am absolutely overwhelmed to have received so much good news! Reaching finals and taking part in awards ceremonies has a really important purpose for myself and PEGS, as it gets the issue of Child to Parent Abuse out there on the national stage, bringing awareness to the issue and showing that it can – and should – be talked about anywhere and everywhere.

“I’d like to thank those who supported me in the National Business Women’s Awards vote, and those who have supported the PEGS journey – not least my team and the board members. Everyone who’s cheered for me and for PEGS has enabled us to support parents, giving them a safe space in which they are listened to, believed, and empowered.”

To find out more about the awards, visit www.bestbusinesswomenawards.com or www.eventsandpr.co.uk/national-business-womens-awards .

Child to Parent Abuse campaigner reaches awards final

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 30 Jun 2022 16:44:28 GMT

A campaigner working to reduce the impact of Child to Parent Abuse has impressed the judges of the Great British Entrepreneur Awards.

Michelle John, our Founding Director, has been named among the Midlands finalists in the Entrepreneur for Good category.

The winners will be announced at a ceremony in London on Monday 21 ^st November. It’s the tenth anniversary of the awards, which this year had more than 5,300 entrants.

Michelle said: “I’m delighted to have reached the regional finals, and honoured to be named among some of the very best entrepreneurs the UK has to offer.

“While it’s a personal highlight to be named as a finalist, it also means that many more people will hear about Child to Parent Abuse through the awards – which is fantastic in itself. While at least 3% of UK households are estimated to be impacted by CPA, it still remains a largely-hidden form of domestic abuse, which is why we work so hard at PEGS to highlight the issue.”

PEGS has four main aims: supporting parents, carers and guardians experiencing CPA, no matter the age of their child (including adult offspring); training frontline professionals including police forces, social care teams, and school staff; raising awareness through traditional, digital and social media, events and speeches; and influencing regional and national policy.

In its first two years of operation, PEGS helped more than 2,000 parents via peer support, bespoke workshops, empowerment programmes, advocacy and one-to-ones. All parental support is provided for free regardless of the financial circumstances of the family.

Founder of the Great British Entrepreneur Awards, Francesca James, said the quality of this year’s entrants exemplified the strength of entrepreneurship across the UK: “The quality of applications is consistently excellent year on year, but we have been especially blown away by the innovation, drive and determination demonstrated this year. Shortlisting from so many inspiring contenders has been more challenging than ever, with many deserving cases put forward and an ever-growing business community thriving across the country.”

Visit greatbritishentrepreneurawards.com for more information about the awards.

National Lottery grant to support parents abused by their children

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 16 Jun 2022 17:53:07 GMT

Extra support for parents being abused by their children has been secured thanks to more than £300,000 from The National Lottery Community Fund, the largest funder of community activity in the UK.

We are delighted to announce we've been awarded the money over the next three years in order to expand our services.

In its first two years of operation, PEGS supported more than 2,000 parents – and we now have in excess of 100 referrals a month from all over the UK. Parents, carers and guardians can refer themselves, or can be signposted by a professional.

The services on offer include virtual drop-ins, a peer support group, empowerment programmes, tailored workshops, one-to-ones and advocacy.

Michelle John, our Founding Director, said we were thrilled the National Lottery funding panel had recognised the need for CPA services – especially given at least 3% of UK households were thought to be impacted by abuse, which could be physical, financial, emotional, or even sexual.

Child of any age, including adult offspring, can display the behaviours – and sadly, at the very extreme end of the abuse, an incident of parricide (where a parent is killed by their child) happens once every 19 days in England and Wales.

Michelle added: “It’s vital for us to ensure parents feel listened to, believed and empowered – and the National Lottery funding will enable us to reach even more parents who currently may have no one to turn to. It can be extremely isolating to experience CPA, especially given it’s traditionally been fairly unknown and the support has always been limited.

“We aim to increase awareness around the topic, among the general public and among frontline services working alongside families, as well as working with national and regional bodies to help them implement and develop their policies, practices and frameworks.

“This will all be made much easier over the next three years thanks to the grant from The National Lottery Community Fund. Initially, we will be looking to open a new hub and take on additional staff in order to support an increase in services such as calls, drop-ins, advocacy, workshops and programmes.”

Sharing parents’ CPA stories

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 11 Jun 2022 15:43:28 GMT

At PEGS, we work closely with the media and have contributed to stories on national news channels, within newspaper, magazines and various online platforms. Where media organisations want to include details of a family’s experience within their story, we have parents who have incredibly bravely stepped forward and shared their experiences.

We always insist that parents’ stories are kept completely anonymous, meaning their names and other identifying details are not used, their image is blurred or otherwise distorted, and usually their voices are either changed or their words are spoken by an actor.

It must be said that we have found the media extremely responsive and willing to do all of this to ensure the anonymity of the interviewees.

Once they agree to these conditions, then we will ask parents for an interview, to be filmed, or even to send across a written account of their experiences. It’s made clear that parents can change their mind at any point after agreeing to share their story.

It’s important parents feel safe and that not only they, but also their child, are protected throughout the process and aren’t identifiable from the story.

Michelle’s experience

When it comes to the lived experience of Founding Director Michelle John, she has always been open about the fact PEGS was set up as a result of the CPA she lived through.

But Michelle does not disclose the details of her experience, not only because she feels this is the right thing to do for all of her family, but also because she feels it’s important that other experiences of CPA aren't compared to her story.

If parents are experiencing different behaviours then this may discourage them from approaching PEGS for support and that’s something we’d never want – because CPA has a very real impact on all parents/carers/guardians living through it (and even after the behaviours have stopped), no matter what the specifics of their experience are.

So, we will continue to share anonymous case studies (only where parents are completely happy to do so) and the details of Michelle’s story will continue to remain private.

Children’s social care report calls for ‘dramatic reset’

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 24 May 2022 09:25:39 GMT

A ‘dramatic whole system reset’ has been recommended as part of a review into children’s social care in the UK.

The independent report compiled by Josh McAlister, founder of the Frontline charity, has now been submitted to Government for their consideration. The report is critical of the current system, stating it is ‘increasingly skewed to crisis intervention with outcomes for children that continue to be unacceptably poor’.

Instead, it states, the system should provide ‘intensive help’ to families in crisis, act ‘decisively in response to abuse’ and put ‘lifelong loving relationships at the heart of the care system’.

A £2billion investment over the next five years (with a ring-fenced annual grant after that) is recommended in order to introduce a Family Help system (to replace targeted early help and child in need work). This service would comprise of teams including family support workers, domestic abuse workers and mental health practitioners as well as social workers. One of the benefits, according to the review team, would be to reduce the number of referrals to different services.

Other recommendations include:

· The introduction of Expert Child Protection Practitioners to oversee decisions where there’s potential for significant harm to the child.

· Better representation for parents going through the child protection process.

· Bringing wider family members and friends into the decision making before a child is placed in care.

· A statutory financial allowance, legal aid and kinship leave for special guardians and kinship carers with a Child Arrangement Order.

· Regional Care Cooperatives to oversee fostering, residential and secure care arrangements in their area.

· Launching a recruitment programme for foster carers.

· Remove barriers which reduce the time social workers can spend with families.

You can read the executive summary of the report here – and the review website contains more information and the full report, as well as background information used to compile the recommendations.

PEGS becomes Disability Confident

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 23 May 2022 16:22:11 GMT

PEGS has signed up to a Disability Confident scheme, aimed at attracting, recruiting, retaining and developing disabled people in the workplace.

Led by the Department for Work and Pensions, the scheme has three levels and we are currently at Level 1 (Disability Confident Committed) and working towards our Level 2.

Some of the key goals are enabling employers like ourselves to increase our understanding of disability; removing barriers which might be preventing people who are disabled or have long-term health conditions from accessing employment; and playing our part in ensuring disabled people have opportunities to fulfil their potential and realise their aspirations.

We’d encourage other employers to sign up, to enable them to access free information, support and guidance as well as online forums, and events including webinars and conferences which are only open to members of the scheme.

Our founding director Michelle John said: “Accessing work shouldn’t be harder for some people than others – at PEGS what matters to us when we are recruiting is whether the candidate has the expertise, sensitivity and knowledge to support parents who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse.

“However, we want to ensure we’re not unintentionally making it more difficult for those with disabilities and long-term health conditions to access our roles – and that as we continue to grow, all of our recruitment practices are in line with the most up to date recommendations.

“We also feel the information we learn along the way on our Disability Confident journey will be beneficial to the parents and professionals we work with, a proportion of which have a disability.

“We look forward to reaching Level 2 soon!”

Click the link to find out more about becoming Disability Confident.

Media guidance: reporting on CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 07 May 2022 13:23:38 GMT

Reporting on emotive topics such as Child to Parent Abuse can be tricky - but at PEGS we believe this shouldn't put media organisations off doing so. Since launching the organisation, we've worked alongside many regional and national television programmes, radio stations, newspapers, magazines, blogs and podcasts - as we believe this is a key way to raise awareness of CPA among parents, professionals and the general population.

Especially for media outlets who may not have covered CPA before, we know there can be many different questions and considerations before the piece goes live - and that's why we've produced a short guide for any media outlets looking to cover CPA in a respectful, sensitive and responsible manner.

You can download the general guidance by clicking the button below.

Please note, we are more than happy to liaise directly with the media about stories on CPA, any specific questions, or to assist in finding parents willing to share their story anonymously. You can also request interviews, filming time, or quotes from our Founding Director Michelle John.

All media queries should be directed to Harriet at Zen | harriet@zen-communications.co.uk | 07788 379389 .

Public vote will decide who wins business award

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 29 Apr 2022 17:30:49 GMT

Our founder is in the running for a prestigious award after supporting more than 2,000 parents experiencing abuse in the last two years.

Michelle John has been nominated for a National Business Women’s Award in the Business Hero category.

And now she needs support to secure a victory at the ceremony later this year. The public vote is open until June, with just one vote available per person.

Michelle began her career in the family law and domestic abuse sectors, setting up PEGS after realising there was little or no support available for parents, carers and guardians who experience Child to Parent Abuse.

Michelle first began offering parental services in the form of virtual drop-ins, a closed peer support group, a bespoke empowerment programme, workshops, one-to-ones and advocacy in spring 2020 and has helped more than 2,000 parents in the intervening two years.

Alongside that, she’s also created an identification tool for professionals to use and a range of training courses, undertaken by police forces, social care teams, health authorities and many others.

Her DWP-backed Employer Covenant enables workplaces to create policies and practices to support their staff and service users. Michelle has also consulted with the Home Office on the CPA section of the Domestic Abuse Bill documents (the first time this type of abuse has been included in a DA Bill) and helped create the first regional CPA-specific policy in Mid and West Wales.

She’s been asked to speak at events for NHS Safeguarding Leads, Westminster Domestic Abuse Forum, Herefordshire & Worcestershire Chamber of Commerce, British Association of Social Workers and many more - and she’s been named among the WISE 100 Women in Social Enterprise twice (this year reaching the finals in the Rising Star category).

Tony Hyland MBE, Senior National Account Manager at the Department for Work and Pensions, said: “It’s been a tremendous pleasure working with Michelle and PEGS – she’s a force for good and not only talks the talk, but walks the walk!

“Her proactivity in formulating the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant (CPAC) and make it such a success is testament to her passion for this hugely-overlooked agenda, and she is single-handedly bringing the issue to the surface, and providing support to those in need of it.

“From a Government perspective, we value her involvement and look forward to continuing to support her and CPAC on their journey.”

Simply click here to cast your vote.

CPA to be highlighted at Survivors' Voices Conference

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 29 Apr 2022 07:19:50 GMT

PEGS will be helping to shine a light on an often-hidden form of domestic abuse during an Ipswich-based event.

The Survivors’ Voices Conference aims to highlight different types of abuse, with one of the speakers being our founder Michelle John.

Michelle said: “Thank you to the team at Vodas Training for asking me to be a part of the Survivors’ Voices Conference. It’s important when we think of those impacted by domestic abuse that we consider all forms of abuse – including CPA.

“As individuals, and as a society, we need to be mindful that abuse can impact anyone at any time – by keeping that in mind, it enables us to identify those impacted by CPA and other lesser-known forms of abuse, and to more effectively support them.

“At PEGS, we listen to, believe and empower our parents, and this should apply to anyone impact by abuse.”

Also speaking at the event is Emma Roscoe , founder of the The Kintsugi Collective, who works with women who’ve experienced intimate partner abuse to help them feel empowered to live life on their own terms again. Emma has also leads Bounce Back, Step Forward workshops for PEGS parents, focused around resilience.

The event runs from 10am to 4pm on Friday 13 ^th May at The Hold in Ipswich, with tickets costing £75 (to include lunch). Email events@vodastraining.co.uk for more information or to book your place.

CPA deaths account for one in every eight domestic homicide victims

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 26 Apr 2022 22:40:40 GMT

Trigger warning This blog contains details about Domestic Homicide Reviews and details of parental deaths caused by their children. Please only read the blog, and the report it references, if you feel emotional able to do so.

Analysis of Domestic Homicide Reviews shows one in every eight victims were killed by their child or grandchild.

Of the 124 cases (involving 127 deaths) looked at as part of a recently-released Home Office report, 16 were identified as being caused by the son, daughter, or grandchild of the person who died.

Ten deaths were caused by the son of the victim, four by the daughter, and two by a grandchild.

Domestic Homicide Reviews (DHRs) take place after the death of an adult resulting from violence, abuse or neglect by a relative, a partner/former partner, or someone living in the same household. The cases analysed by the Home Office all relate to DHRs from 2019, with most of the incidents having sadly occurred in 2017 and 2018.

Where ‘aggravating factors’ were involved, it was noted that coercive control was a factor in two thirds of cases, with physical stalking in 18% and digital stalking in 8% of cases.

More than 70% of those responsible for the deaths had a vulnerability such using illicit drugs, problematic alcohol use, or mental ill health.

They were known to the police prior to the death in over half of cases and to children’s social services in one in eight cases, with a smaller percentage being known to health, probation, or housing services.

14 of the victims died by suicide which was felt by professionals to be as a direct result of the abuse they were experiencing.

Of the cases where the person responsible has been tried in court and sentenced, 62 were found guilty of murder and 25 of manslaughter, while a verdict of diminished responsibility was given in 9 cases, a different charge applied in a further 9 cases, and the person ruled unfit to plead in 4 cases.

Those given a prison sentence for murder were serving between 11 and 40 years (average 21 years) while those found guilty of manslaughter were given between 3 and 21 years in prison (average 11 years).

As part of the analysis, the Home Office has issued guidance to professionals around reviewing existing practice, keeping good quality information - and shared with other agencies where appropriate - and ensuring frontline practitioners undergo further training.

You can read the full report here.

High Sheriff of Warwickshire Award for PEGS

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 26 Apr 2022 22:28:55 GMT

Our Founder Michelle has been honoured with a special High Sheriff Award in recognition of the work PEGS does to support parents , carers, and professionals .

The outgoing High Sheriff of Warwickshire, Min Willoughby de Broke, presented Michelle with the award as part of her final duties in office, and said:

“The High Sheriff Awards are designed to recognise and honour organisations, groups, and individuals who have demonstrated a commitment to their communities, who do incredible things, and who make a genuine difference to the lives of others.

“I had the privilege during my shrieval year of being introduced to Michelle and, having learned about the work she and her team do to support those in need, I acknowledged very quickly how deserving of recognition she was. Her organisation is remarkable, and I know that the work they’re doing not only in Warwickshire but across the entire country, is changing the lives of so many people.”

PEGS was also gifted a donation from the High Sheriff Endowment Fund via the Heart of England Community Foundation.

Michelle said: “Myself and the whole PEGS team are so proud to have been presented with this award and are honoured to have the work we do within our communities recognised in this way. The donation also kindly given to us by the High Sheriff will help us continue to support families in very real need, and we’re hugely grateful.”

PEGS board member helps London Mayor highlight CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 20 Apr 2022 13:00:41 GMT

The London Mayor has released new research on Child to Parent Abuse, which has been co-authored by Dr Amanda Holt , who we’re proud to have sitting on the PEGS advisory board.

She worked alongside Ecorys and Professor Iain Brennan from the University of Hull on the report – which was published by London’s Violence Reduce Unit headed by Mayor Sadiq Khan.

It shows at least 40% of London-based parents and carers who experienced violence between 2011 and 2020 did not report it to the police.

Feelings of shame, and fear of criminalisation or the child being removed from the home were highlighted, as too were the concerns of frontline professionals who warned they felt CPA was likely to continue to increase going forward.

This is partly due to the ‘inconsistent and patchwork provision of support available for families and a lack of understanding about how to access it’.

Parents who were interviewed as part of the research said they only contacted police when they had no other choice and were afraid for their physical safety, and always after multiple incidents of violence.

The VRU is now looking to implement recommendations to help facilitate a joined-up approach, including advocating for statutory guidance for professionals and training of CPA champions within social care and safeguarding teams.

Speaking as the report was announced, Dr Holt said:

“This report is the first of its kind to offer a really comprehensive analysis of child/adolescent violence towards parents across a particular region – in this case London.

“It highlights the extent of its under-reporting, the reasons why parents and carers don't come forward, and why a multi-faced and collaborative approach is necessary for any kind of effective intervention. I look forward to seeing the next steps for developing appropriate responses to combat this particularly hidden form of family violence.”

To find out more, and to read the full report, click here .

PEGS shortlisted for Small Award

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 18 Apr 2022 10:22:16 GMT

We’re thrilled to announce that we’ve been shortlisted in the Mission Possible category of the 2022 Small Awards .

Run by Small Business Britain , the annual awards were launched in 2017 with the specific aim of showcasing and celebrating the ‘smallest and greatest organisations’ in the UK. The Mission Possible category recognises those businesses who are driven by a purpose and who are passionate about, and committed to, making a difference within their communities.

In the last couple of years, we’ve supported so many individuals, families and professionals dealing with CPA, have worked tirelessly to raise awareness of this often-hidden form of domestic abuse, and have helped give a voice to those in desperate need. And we’re proud to be continuing to make a real difference.

The Small Awards will be judged by a panel of enterprise experts, with winners of all categories to be announced at a special ceremony in London on Thursday 19th May.

Charity and NFP tickets launched for Conference

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 04 Apr 2022 17:12:32 GMT

Special tickets for charities and not-for-profits are now available for our virtual conference focused on Child to Parent Abuse.

The discounted tickets for the CPA Conference on Thursday 28 ^th April are available to any charity, social enterprise, CIC or other non-profit-making organisation.

Running from 9am to 4pm and organised by PEGS, one of the leading UK organisations providing support for parents and professional training, the Conference features speakers from the Domestic Abuse Commissioner’s office, local authorities, the DWP, Adoption UK, Safe Lives and many others.

There are also two panels and Q&A sessions with leading researchers, and key policy makers – with a wealth of resources available on the day and for eight weeks after the date of the Conference.

PEGS Founding Director Michelle John said: “Being a social enterprise ourselves, we wanted to minimise the barriers not-for-profits face when attending events by offering discounted tickets.

“The event is open to anyone who wants to find out more about current policy, knowledge and best practice around CPA – and to be part of the solution as we work collectively to better support at least 3% of UK families who are currently experiencing this type of abuse.

“Join us on the 28 ^th April to help bring CPA out of the shadows.”

To find out more and to purchase your tickets, simply visit www.pegsevents.co.uk .

Bee Inspired as PEGS Director takes to the stage

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 08 Mar 2022 20:01:51 GMT

A familiar face is set to take to the stage at this year’s Bee Inspired.

The event, hosted by Dani Wallace – presenter, author and business mentor, takes place across two days (31 ^st March and 1 ^st April) with the audience attending virtually and in-person in Manchester.

The schedule is packed full of life education, business motivation and spiritual inspiration tips, with speeches on everything from identity and relationships to branding and leadership to connecting to your inner magic.

Among this year’s line-up is PEGS Founding Director Michelle John - her talk (taking place on Thursday 31 ^st March) will focus on the blame, shame and guilt which surrounds CPA and what the audience can do individually and collectively to help support parents rather than blame them for the abuse they are experiencing.

Since PEGS became operational less than two years ago, Michelle has been called on by the Home Office to consult on policies, spoken at a Westminster Domestic Abuse Forum, hosted an online event attended by professionals from across the UK, supported more than 2,000 parents, launched a DWP-backed Employer Covenant, and given talks to social workers, safeguarding leads, health professionals, colleges, and many others.

She says: “I’m delighted to be speaking at Bee Inspired this year, having been a huge fan of the event in previous years. Raising awareness about Child to Parent Abuse means fewer families have to live in silence, in fear of the repercussions of speaking out and the potential for them to be blamed for their child’s actions.

“We know CPA impacts at least 3% of UK households – but we also know it’s under-reported and not talked about nearly enough as it should be. I’m utterly passionate about changing that and improving people’s experiences of seeking support, and I’m delighted to be able to share that message with the audience. A huge thank you to Dani and her team for their ongoing support.”

Attendees can book a ticket to be in the room on either or both days, or an online ticket for both days. £25 of the cost of any ticket booked using THIS LINK will be donated back to PEGS by the Bee Inspired organisers.

Chamber members find out about impact of parent abuse

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 07 Mar 2022 16:13:37 GMT

Herefordshire & Worcestershire Chamber members had the chance to find out about how Child to Parent Abuse could be impacting their employees.

Our Founding Director Michelle John joined a recent online HR Forum to discuss the work we’d been doing to support parents, carers and guardians impacted by CPA.

This includes launching an Employer Covenant in partnership with the Department for Work and Pensions, in response to PEGS research which showed 70% of parents had either been forced to reduce their hours or quit work altogether as a result of the abuse they were experiencing at home

The Covenant is free for all organisations to sign, and acts as a pledge that they will explore how to implement policies and practices which support any of their staff (and service users, if applicable) who are experiencing abuse.

Anyone signing up gets access to a free webinar hosted by the PEGS team, HR resources, information about CPA, and ongoing support.

Michelle said: “I’d like to thank the Chamber for the opportunity to share an overview of CPA and how it can impact the work lives of parents, carers and guardians. I’d also like to thank the employers who attended the session and took the time to find out about CPA.

“We are keen to work with any employer – whether public, private or voluntary sector – as the more awareness we can raise and the more support we can provide, the more we give parents a voice and hope for the future.”

Spark Social highlights Shropshire successes

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 03 Mar 2022 10:42:10 GMT

Our Founding Director Michelle John was delighted to be asked to join the line-up at the recent Spark Social event.

Hosted by Shropshire Council and the Marches Growth Hub , the online event served to highlight the wealth of not-for-profit organisations there are within the county, and the fantastic work they’re undertaking.

Michelle was interviewed by Shropshire Business magazine editor Carl Jones, sharing how the PEGS journey began and some of the key milestones in the journey so far.

She spoke about the support she’d received since day one from the Growth Hub – and said she hoped the event would inspire others who had viable ideas to go ahead and launch their own social enterprise.

“Don’t ever be afraid of having a no, because it just means there is another opportunity out there which may be better for you.”

Michelle said sometimes social enterprises were overlooked but they could bring an enormous amount to the table, and there was huge value in linking arms and working collectively to make the community the best it could be.

“My main priority remains the same to this day, and that is to offer support to those who are living in constant fear, walking on eggshells and feeling they’re the ones at fault…My biggest objective will always be providing support for those parents.”

If you’d like to re-watch the event, you can find all the interviews including Michelle’s here.

The CPA Conference goes virtual - get your early bird code now!

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 01 Mar 2022 19:17:22 GMT

The CPA Conference is now virtual - and early bird codes are up for grabs!

You may have heard about the Child to Parent Abuse Conference being hosted by PEGS.

With life still not fully back to normal and people still understandably cautious about large face-to-face events, we took the decision to move the event online, to enable everyone to attend safely and without worry.

The Conference will still be taking place at the same time, same date, and with the same fantastic line-up of speakers - and there are now early bird codes available until 18th March which will entitle you to almost 25% off the cost of a ticket.

Thursday 28th April | 9am to 4pm | Virtual Conference

The Child to Parent Abuse Conference will bring together researchers, policy-makers, decision-takers, frontline professionals and campaigners.

We'll share current knowledge, best practice and case studies, and focus on how we can collaboratively work to better support parents, carers and guardians impacted by Child to Parent Abuse.

Pre-register now to receive your early bird code.

Pre-registering before the 18th March ensures you receive an email as soon as booking goes live, so you won’t miss out on getting a ticket.

AND it means you’ll get a conference delegate bag.

AND, best of all, it entitles you to a fantastic discount of almost 25% on your ticket.

Simply click here and enter your details to get a code (via email) to use when you book your ticket, which will lower the cost from £65+VAT down to £50+VAT.

An entire £15 as a thank you from PEGS, just for letting us know you’re intending to attend.

Why attend?

A fantastic speaker line-up including representatives from:

The Department for Work and Pensions, Adoption UK, SafeLives, Youth Justice Board, Royal College of General Practitioners.

Domestic abuse partnership leaders, top academics and criminologists, practitioners, policy makers and more.

Networking with speakers, attendees, Q&A, interactive sessions and much more throughout the day.

Change is coming down the line - the voices of parents experiencing CPA will be heard.
Will you be part of that change? Will you help amplify those voices? Are you joining us to lead the way into the future?

Let's work together. Join PEGS, our speakers, sponsors, supporters and Conference attendees and shine a line on Child to Parent Abuse.

Pre-register now to receive your early bird code.

Michelle named as Star of the Future finalist

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 01 Mar 2022 13:59:45 GMT

We’re absolutely thrilled to announce that our Founding Director has reached the finals of the WISE100.

Last week, Michelle John was named as one of the UK’s top 100 women in social enterprise and impact investment. Then today, she was revealed as one of the nine finalists in the Star of the Future category .

The category is for any CEO or leader who’s already showing star qualities and is three or fewer years into leading a social enterprise.

It’s the job of guest judge June O’Sullivan from LEYF to pick the winner, with the announcement being made at a ceremony in London on Friday 18 ^th March.

We’re so proud of Michelle, and the difference she’s making to the lives of parents impacted by CPA, through her tireless hard work, determination and resilience.

We’d also like to highlight the fantastic work of the other Star of the Future finalists: Bayo Adelaja from Do it Now Now ; Catherine Manning of Social Value UK ; Charlotte Newman from Carefree Space ; Claire Buckle of Ability Consultancy ; Emma Lange of Impact Hub King’s Cross ; Gabriela Matouskova from Hope for the Community CIC ; Kariba Amachree of Pragmatic Healthcare ; and Laura North from We Speak .

Lancashire research reveals extent of police call-outs for CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sun, 20 Feb 2022 12:19:43 GMT

Research released by the University of Central Lancashire this week has revealed a tenth of domestic abuse cases the police were called out to were incidents involving Child to Parent Abuse.

The university worked alongside Lancashire Police and Lancashire Violence Reduction Network on the project, funded by the Home Office.

The full report can be read here – but we’ve also gone through and summarised some of the main findings below.

*Do be aware the report features details of serious CPA incidents and parricides, so please only read its contents if you feel emotionally comfortable to do so.*

There were 66,973 domestic abuse incidents in Lancashire in the date range studied as part of the project (27 ^th November 2018 to 28 ^th February 2021) – of which 7,171 were incidents where a parental figure was the victim. (It’s important to note due to the legal definition of domestic abuse being behaviours displayed by a person aged 16 or over, the research only covers CPA incidents where the child is 16 or over).

In 69% of cases, the person being reported was the son of the victim – in 19% of cases it was the daughter, and the rest of the cases were grandchildren or other relatives.

44% of incidents involved violence towards a person, 34% were domestic abuse incidents which the police were called to, but which were classified as non-criminal offences, 12% involved arson or criminal damage and 0.7% were sexual offences.

There was an increase of 37% during Christmas and 41% over New Year.

The oldest person reported for CPA was 74 , and the average age was just under 27 (again, worth noting all incidents recorded were where the person being abusive or violent was 16 or over).

27% had previously been investigated for domestic abuse – with a small proportion having been investigated up to 21 times during the timeframe of the study.

And 24% had been classified as the victim in a previous domestic abuse investigation, some up to 18 times.

The average age of the victim was 54 , and the oldest victim was 98 .

In the majority of cases, the victim did not support or withdrew their support for further police action – in a small number of cases, there was difficulty getting enough evidence to take the case forward.

There were charges or summons issues in around 8% of the cases which had been classified as a crime.

PEGS welcomes this research, and the awareness being raised of CPA as a result – it’s important to recognise the numbers of parents needing to call police because of abuse they are experiencing from their children, and what can be done collectively to reduce the impact of CPA. Research like this report is essential in furthering our understanding and evidencing the need for better support.

Grant to help us support Birmingham women

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 18 Feb 2022 14:10:31 GMT

We have been awarded a grant of £3,700 to help marginalised women in Birmingham - from the Stronger Communities Commonwealth Games Legacy Fund – which is being overseen by Birmingham Voluntary Service Council and Birmingham City Council .

We'll be using the funding to support parents, carers and guardians from the area who are experiencing abusive or violent behaviour from their child (of any age, including adult offspring).

Michelle John, PEGS' founding director, said: “We want to champion these individuals to become more empowered to speak out, and

to share their journeys with others in the community, which in turn can help their peers.

“We want to give them an opportunity to feel supported, heard and encouraged by their community, and to feel safe and included regardless of their experiences.

“Giving the voiceless a voice is incredibly powerful, and this can be achieved by working with them to understand their barriers and decrease the exclusion they may be feeling in their community.”

The aim of the fund is to deliver activities that support women who are struggling to integrate and be fully engaged in their local communities; that address barriers to participation for women who are digitally excluded; and that provide them with a platform to strengthen their English-speaking skills in a safe setting.

PEGS will use the grant to deliver virtual drop-in sessions and peer support opportunities for those within the identified marginalised groups who are experiencing CPA, which is thought to impact in excess of 3% of UK households.

Channel 5 News: Mother shares harrowing account of attack

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 24 Jan 2022 19:04:04 GMT

This report contains details of assault and parents being killed by their children. Please only watch the video if you feel emotionally able to.

Tonight Channel 5 News shared a new Child to Parent Abuse report, focused around the very worst violence shown by children towards parents/carers/guardians.

A mother bravely shared the story of her son's harrowing attack on her, alongside PEGS board member Dr Amanda Holt sharing her expertise on the need for more support for families, to ensure these severe attacks - and parricides (where a parent is killed by their child) - are reduced.

Once again, our thanks to the Channel 5 news team, including chief correspondent Tessa Chapman , for their commitment to sensitively and diligently covering Child to Parent Abuse - the awareness they are raising really could be life-saving.

You can find out more about Dr Holt's study into parricide (the first large-scale research undertaken in England and Wales) here .

We've also shared the initial Channel 5 report into Child to Parent Abuse and the way incidents are recorded by police (aired in November 2021) here .

If you're a professional who'd like to find out more about CPA, our latest training details can be obtained from training@pegsupport.com , or why not book a place at our national CPA Conference , taking place on 28th April 2022.

Employers can also get involved in the campaign to raise awareness and better support parents, by signing the free Child to Parent Abuse Covenant , backed by the DWP.

If you're a parent experiencing abuse or violence from your child, please seek support - we hear you, we believe you, you are not alone. In an emergency situation, always call 999 - any non-emergency incident requiring a police response can be reported on 101.

What is CPA?

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 22 Jan 2022 16:50:43 GMT

There is no standard legal definition of Child to Parent Abuse – in fact, there are still discussions happening about what to call CPA, never mind how to define this type of domestic abuse.

This can lead to problems and even confusion when it comes to explaining exactly what constitutes CPA, and how it differs from expected childhood behaviour.

Our Founding Director Michelle John explains:

“With CPA, we are talking about extreme behaviours that leave parents and siblings feeling fearful, worried, and scared. Parents often avoid saying or doing certain things so an incident doesn’t occur or escalate.

“We hear how parents are changing the way they want to parent and are choosing the least reactive option available to them, to keep them and others safe; how they are no longer going out in their community or how they are too worried about having family and friends around; how the impact on their employment has been to the point of losing their job which brings further worry about living and housing expenses.

“CPA is not typical behaviours, it is not just the pushing of boundaries, and it is not that parents need to have firmer boundaries and/or consequences. The parents we support tell us daily how they fear for their lives (and the lives of their other children) - yet they are ignored or told they are exaggerating, and told they can’t possibly be scared of their child.

“People do not normally question fears, but when parents are fearful of their child, this seems to be routinely questioned as if their experience and feeling must somehow be wrong? Sometimes their experiences are also questioned because the behaviours are not shown outside of the homes – but again, if someone disclosed that they were being abused by their partner at home, we wouldn’t normally question this?

“Just because you may be fortunate enough to not have experienced these behaviours from your child, does not mean it is not another’s reality. Yes, it may be difficult to understand and it certainly is complex but this should not be a barrier for believing those who have found incredible strength to tell you what is happening for them.

“Parents come to us because they feel they have nowhere else to go, that every door is closed or they are told they are at fault. Violent, controlling and abusive behaviours have a real impact on a family’s daily life – and for some there is sadly a risk to the lives of those living in the home.

“The parents we support tell us how they spend each day trying to survive without incident and then spending the night hoping everyone wakes tomorrow.

“CPA affects individuals, families and communities, what those affected by this need is to be believed, heard and supported.”

Incidents are frequent (normally multiple times a month, but more often than not weekly or even daily) and sadly escalate over time – just as with other types of domestic abuse.

Every family and every situation is unique – but we often see:

- Risk or threat to health or life of those living in the household.

- Abusive or violent behaviour may only be shown at home.

- Continued disruption, with a huge impact on work, finances, socialising and day to day life.

- Incidents happen frequently (often daily or multiple times a week) and escalate over time.

- Physical, emotional, financial and even sexual abuse can be displayed.

- Parents change their behaviours to try and minimise the risk of an incident escalating, and often feel fearful.

Click here if you're a parent, here if you're a professional, or here if you're an employer and you'd like to find out more.

Support organisations for children

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 19 Jan 2022 11:40:43 GMT

PEGS is a social enterprise set up to support parents, carers and guardians who are impacted by Child to Parent Abuse . We know from lived experience that there is a real gap in provision when it comes to supporting the adults whose lives are impacted by this type of abuse – and that’s why our aim when it comes to delivering services, and training professionals, is to focus on those experiencing these abusive or violent behaviours.

We have been asked: ‘But what about the children?’

We absolutely recognise the need for specialist input when it comes to exploring why a child may be displaying this type of behaviour, and working with them to resolve any underlying issues as well as developing coping techniques and new communication methods.

But firstly, there are wonderful services out there already providing this type of input (many of whom we work alongside so that they support the child while we concentrate on the parent). And secondly, our area of expertise is the parent, so we want to channel all of our experience and knowledge into them.

If you’re looking for a support service for your child, then we’ve put together a list of just some of the wonderful organisations out there working hard to support young people. It’s also worth asking your social care team, child’s school, or other services you’re already engaged with as they may be aware of some additional services local to you.

Barnardo’s | Supporting vulnerable children, including those who have experienced abuse, and preparing young people for adulthood.

Childline | A free confidential phone line and email service for children under 19, to talk about any issue which is troubling them | Call 0800 1111.

Hope Again | Peer-led support for young people experiencing bereavement.

The Mix | Information and support on a range of issues for those aged up to 25 | Text THEMIX to 85258 in a crisis.

NSPCC | A phone line for adults to discuss any concerns they have about a child (under 18s should call Childline) | Call 0808 800 5000.

OKRehab | Guidance and support on substance misuse and co-occurring mental health problems | 0800 326 5559.

Papyrus | Focused on the prevention of suicide among young people aged under 35 | Call the Hopeline on 0800 068 4141.

Runaway Helpline | For those who are thinking of leaving home, or who already have | Text 116 000.

Talk to Frank | Honest information about drugs | Text 82111.

Winston’s Wish | Charity which supports children after the death of a parent or sibling | Call 08088 020 021 for information about how they can help.

Young Minds | Supporting children and young people with their mental health.

In an emergency, always call 999. Or if there’s a non-emergency situation which requires police input, call 101.

PEGS at Christmas & Crisis Support

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 16 Dec 2021 14:21:58 GMT

Ahead of the festive break, we wanted to share our opening hours with you, as well as some crisis numbers for services open during Christmas.

Over Christmas, PEGS will be closed as normal over the weekends, evenings, and Bank Holidays. This means the office will be open – and emails to admin@pegsupport.com will be answered – up to the 24 ^th and then on the 29 ^th – 31 ^st inclusive. We usually see an increase in referrals over holiday periods, so please allow extra time for your email to be answered.

Our weekly Wednesday drop-ins will continue as usual – with the link being posted on our Facebook page just beforehand.

And there will be a team member monitoring the closed peer support group on Wednesday 29 ^th , Thursday 30 ^th and Friday 31 ^st December.

We know that Christmas can be an extremely difficult time for families experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, so do reach out to a crisis support or emergency service if needed over the festive period.

Here are some contact details which may be of use:

CALM | Call 0800 58 58 58 | Webchat | Open 5pm to midnight every evening

Papyrus | Call 0800 068 4141 | Email pat@papyrus-uk.org | Confidential suicide prevention advice, 9am to midnight every day, for those aged under 35 or those concerned a young person is at risk of suicide

Samaritans | Call 116 123 | Email jo@samaritans.org | Available 24/7

SANE | Call 07984 967708 and leave your name, number and a short message and a member of the team will call back as soon as they can | Open every day

Shout | Text 85258 | Free 24/7 service for anyone struggling with any problem

The Silverline | Call 0800 470 8090 | Helpline for older people open 24/7

Mind’s Info line (0300 123 3393) is closed from 6pm on December 24 ^th until 9am on January 4 ^th but their ‘helping yourself in a crisis’ guidance and other website information could be helpful in the meantime.

*Please call 999 immediately if you or someone else is in danger. Alternatively, call 101 in a non-emergency situation where you need to report an incident to the police*

What is restorative practice?

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 16 Dec 2021 14:14:21 GMT

We recently spoke to Restorative Gloucestershire, a fantastic project working with individuals, families and communities to bring them together and work towards resolutions.

The work they do is known as Restorative Practice - part of which is Restorative Justice (focused on situations where a criminal act has occurred). Restorative Practice has a much wider remit and can be used in situations where there's been a conflict, ongoing problem, or breakdown of communication. Do download the above PDF which will give you much more information.

EPIC v a parenting course: what’s the difference?

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 07 Dec 2021 14:47:14 GMT

A huge frustration we hear from many of our parents is that when they bravely reach out for support having found themselves experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, they are promptly told to go on a parenting course.

FACT: 53% of parents who have changed their mind about contacting a professional for support did so because they felt the professional would think their child’s behaviour was their fault.

As well as worsening the guilt, upset and blame they are already likely to be feeling, this approach is sometimes the only solution they are offered by the agencies they contact.

This reinforces the misconception that CPA is down to parenting…rather than the reality that it can be influenced by a complex range of factors which differ from family to family.

FACT: 88% of parents with multiple children only have one who displays abusive behaviours.

It’s this complexity which means that a ‘one size fits all’ approach simply doesn’t work. Often, a range of options will need to be tried before the parent sees the circumstances changing in their home for the better.

And that’s why when Michelle John launched PEGS, she set out to provide a broad scope of choices for parents – including drop ins, peer support, workshops, advocacy and PEGS’ bespoke EPIC programme.

EPIC stands for Empowering Parents in Crisis and it’s about doing exactly that.

FACT: Three quarters feel blamed for their child’s behaviour.

PEGS won’t tell you what you should be doing differently, or tell you to try something you’ve already tried or know won’t work in your household.

Instead, the sessions focus on communication, on practical steps like putting together a safety plan or recording an incident log, and on building up the confidence that may have been eroded through the parent’s experience of CPA.

FACT: Almost four in ten don’t feel confident about their parenting on a daily basis.

It’s all about that crucial word of empowerment – because so many parents feel blamed, and the lack of widespread knowledge of this type of domestic abuse doesn’t help.

Currently, we have funding to run EPIC programmes in the West Mercia and Derbyshire areas – anyone living in those regions can contact us at admin@pegsupport.com for more information about the programme. Please note funding streams do change over time, so this is subject to change in the future. We provide updates across our social media regularly about where and when programmes are running. We also have a number of specialist workshops running which are accessible for parents anywhere.

All of our statistics are from the PEGS 2021 Parental Survey .

16 Days of Action

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 25 Nov 2021 10:42:58 GMT

Today marks the start of 16 Days of Action, and we'd like to share with you how PEGS is getting involved.

November 25 ^th each year is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women, the beginning of 16 Days of Action .

The End Violence Against Women campaign runs until December 10 ^th , which is International Human Rights Day .

PEGS was set up with four primary aims: three of which focus on influencing policy, support for parents , and training for professionals . The fourth is raising awareness of Child to Parent Abuse.

CPA is under-reported but experts believe at least 3% of households are impacted.

Abuse can be physical, emotional, financial or sexual – with incidents usually worsening over time.

5% of parents experiencing CPA have no one to talk to about their situation.

Almost three quarters of parents feel their health is suffering as a result of the abuse.

One in five parents are physically attacked on a daily basis, and seven in ten are verbally abused every day. [Stats from the PEGS parental survey 2021]

During the 16 Days of Action, we wanted to continue raising awareness – not only about CPA which is a largely hidden form of abuse, but also by sharing with you some of the ways you can get involved, and help make a difference when it comes to stopping abuse and violence in all its forms.

So, we’ll be sharing 16 Ways in 16 Days over on our social media channels – whether that’s ways to access help for yourself or someone else, ways to support someone experiencing CPA, or ways to respond when someone shares what they’re going through.

There’ll be one Way per Day – all will be relevant to CPA but most will also be helpful for other forms of domestic abuse, too.

Do get involved by liking, sharing, and commenting! We’ll be using the hashtag #16WaysIn16Days as well as the campaign hashtags.

Find our social media here:

Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | LinkedIn

Safeguarding Adults Week

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sat, 13 Nov 2021 11:24:49 GMT

15th to 17th November is Safeguarding Adults Week 2021

It's all about highlighting safeguarding issues and raising awareness of best practice, enabling organisations and individuals to gain confidence when it comes to recognise signs and reporting safeguarding concerns.

The week is brought together by the Ann Craft Trust - a leading authority in safeguarding adults and young people at risk; this year their theme is 'creating safer cultures'.

That means:

Minimising the chance of harm happening
Ensuring the correct policies and procedures are in place
Recognising and responding to safeguarding issues effectively and appropriately

There's lots of information on their website about what's going on during the week and how you can get involved. And you can also use the #SafeguardingAdultsWeek on social media.

Naturally, at PEGS we are in total support of raising awareness around safeguarding - especially as lots of our parents might not fall into traditional 'at risk' categories but they are in fact at risk because of the abuse they are receiving from their child.

We're also keen for organisations to learn as much as possible, which is why we've created our CPA training courses - and why we launched our Child to Parent Abuse Covenant, backed by the DWP, which asks employers to think about their policies and practices when it comes to staff and service users who are experiencing CPA.

Channel 5 investigate CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 09 Nov 2021 17:26:42 GMT

Last night, Channel 5 aired a special report into Child to Parent Abuse...

As well as sharing some of the figures from the PEGS 2021 Parental Survey , the report features the research commissioned by the Domestic Abuse Commissioner , and information about the number of incidents reported to the police.

You may also recognise a familiar face, as our Founding Director Michelle was interviewed as part of the piece.

We'd like to say a huge thank you to reporter Tessa, and producers Katie and Christina, for their hard work, sensitivity and dedication to putting this report together. It's done such a lot to raise the profile of CPA, and the impact on parents.

CPA parent survey findings revealed

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 09 Nov 2021 11:16:04 GMT

Helpless. Frustrated. Isolated.

Those are the three most common emotions reported by parents experiencing a little-known form of domestic abuse as part of a survey released this month (November).

And it’s little wonder, as two thirds feel they weren’t supported well by the professionals they approached for support.

Some of the findings were exclusively revealed by Channel 5 News on Monday 8th November, and now we are releasing the full survey.

More than 220 parents, carers and guardians responded to questions revealing the physical, financial, emotional and even sexual abuse they were experiencing; some of the impacts of the abuse; where they’d sought professional support; and the age of the child displaying the behaviours.

The results showed:

· 80% of parents were being hit, kicked or strangled by their child

· 17% had experienced sexualised behaviour from their child

· Of those being verbally abused, this happens on a daily basis for 70% of parents

· 29% of children were also targeting pets or animals, and the majority of those with siblings were targeting them too – mainly through verbal abuse, hitting/kicking, threatening and intimidation

· 95% said they felt helpless, 90% felt frustrated, and 84% isolated

· Well over half had called the police at least once due to their child’s behaviour, and a third of those had called at least five times.

· A quarter of children were aged five or below when the behaviours began, and almost one in ten began displaying abusive or violent behaviours before their teenage years (12 or under).

· 22% of working parents had to leave their job altogether, and an additional 48% had reduced their hours as a direct result of CPA.

· Almost nine in ten parents only have one child who displays abusive behaviours.

Our Founding Director Michelle John said: “Child to Parent Abuse has been largely under-funded and under-researched over the years. Thankfully we are starting to uncover the extent to the issue through the researchers, professionals and campaigners dedicated to highlighting CPA; and we need to continue to do all we can to ensure that the issue is recognised and understood at a regional, national and international level.

“By releasing the data from this survey, we hope to support the furthering of knowledge which is so desperately needed to ensure that the prevalence and impact of CPA becomes more widely known.

“Reading the responses of the parents is hugely impactful – and while the trends and themes shown by the data is useful, we mustn’t forget that behind these statistics are heartbroken parents doing all they can to keep themselves and their families safe, still loving their child but desperately wishing that they weren’t dealing with these abusive and violent behaviours.”

Domestic Abuse Commissioner calls for CPA funding, research and resources

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 08 Nov 2021 18:51:52 GMT

The Domestic Abuse Commissioner has today released a Rapid Literature Review into Child to Parent Abuse...

The report was prepared for the Domestic Abuse Commissioner 's office by Dr Victoria Baker and Helen Bonnick . They looked at a range of questions including what exactly constitutes Child to Parent Abuse , what are the causes/contexts, how does it link to other forms of abuse, what's the impact, what are the current approaches, and are there gaps in our current knowledge and research.

One of the issues highlighted was the range of terminology and definitions used when describing CPA (indeed, at PEGS we refer to it as Child to Parent Abuse as we feel this encapsulates all behaviours from children of any age including youngsters, teens and adult offspring - in the review they refer to CAPVA or Child and Adolescent to Parent Violence and Abuse).

The authors identify wide-ranging impacts on the parents/carers/guardians, on others in the family, and on the child themselves - including physical, emotional, space and movement restrictions, financial and legal consequences.

And they highlight there's no one explanation which can identify why CPA occurs - instead there are a complex set of factors including, but in no way limited to, mental ill health, substance abuse, and having previously witnessed domestic abuse. There are some demographic factors which may put certain families at higher risk - but again these are in no way definite. Including parenting in these factors can (and has) been highlighted as victim blaming.

The report acknowledges that CPA doesn't end at the age of 18 - and that, until recently, the issue was largely unrecognised in social policy.

And of course, there are a number of recommendations made, including:

A Home-Office-led consultation to agree a national definition and terminology
Including data in yearly Office for National Statistics surveys
Longitudinal research looking at the long-term effects
Research to also reflect young people's experiences and perspectives
A dedicated national policy
Additional funding and training for local authorities and agencies to help them implement the policy
A national helpline and digital resource for parents

Do read the full report or the executive summary for more information.

Abuse Talk podcast features PEGS guest

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 04 Nov 2021 09:27:43 GMT

Our Founding Director Michelle John was delighted to be asked to take part in the Abuse Talk podcast this week. As well as the weekly podcast (which goes live at 7.30pm on a Wednesday), there’s an online forum and an hour of questions and chat on Twitter (8pm-9pm on Wednesdays) using the dedicated hashtag #AbuseTalk .

It was all set up by Jennifer Gilmour, aimed at supporting those impacted by abuse and enabling others to find out more about specific experiences and types of abuse.

Michelle had the chance to talk about where those experiencing Child to Parent Abuse could turn to for help; how PEGS was set up; the age range of those displaying abusive behaviours to their parent, carer or guardian; and much more.

We were delighted to see the comments in the Twitter chat afterwards – with discussions centring around parental emotions, avenues of support , and what behaviours a child may display as part of CPA.

If you missed the launch of the podcast, you can listen below – and do check out Jennifer's Twitter page @AbuseTalk and the website to find out more.

First large-scale study of parental killing in England and Wales

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 21 Oct 2021 18:58:45 GMT

Trigger warning The following blog contains information about research conducted into hundreds of incidents where a parent was killed by their child, including detail of the method used. Please only read the blog, and the research itself, if you feel emotionally able to do so.

Dr Amanda Holt is one of the key academics in the UK when it comes to Child to Parent Abuse (and she also sits on the board of PEGS to help advise us on how we support parents and train professionals).

Her role within the University of Roehampton’s criminology department has seen her recently research and publish England and Wales’ first national analysis of parricide.

Parricide is when a parent (including adoptive or step-parent) is killed by their child, either through a single incident or a culmination of abuse/neglect.

Using the Home Office Homicide Index , Dr Holt was able to identify 693 incidents between 1977 and 2012 – equating to around 19 each year. In 23 of those incidents, both parents were killed while the rest claimed the life of one parent.

That’s at least one parent killed every 19 days in England and Wales.

What do we know about the suspects? Around 90% were male | They ranged in age from 11 to 69 | Around 9% were juveniles (under 18).

What do we know about the victims? 51% of those killed were fathers and 49% were mothers | They ranged in age from 25 to 101 | 84% were white, 8% black and 7% Asian.

The most common methods were using a blunt or sharp instrument (60%), strangulation (16%), kicking or hitting (10%), and shooting (7%).

And the most common outcome for the suspect was being found guilty of manslaughter (54%), with 26% being found guilty of murder, 16% being found guilty or other/unknown charges, and 4% being found not guilty by reason of insanity.

Our Founding Director Michelle John said: “Child to Parent Abuse is an uncomfortable topic for many of us to talk about, even more so when we are reflecting on the killing of a parent. It’s so far removed from the reality of most people’s lives, but sadly it is all too real for the loved ones of more than 700 people killed by their children in the 35 years this study covers, and those who have lost their lives since.

“While an isolated incident resulting in the death of a parent might be harder to stop, where the deaths are the result of ongoing abuse or neglect, that represents a tragically missed opportunity by authorities to intervene.

“This research represents a hugely valuable resource for professionals to be able to use as they increase their knowledge and refine their policies and practices around situations where a parent is in danger.”

Click here to read the full report.

New report looks into impact of fraud

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 20 Oct 2021 17:34:54 GMT

A new study by the Victims’ Commissioner has revealed that approximately 4.6 million people are affected by fraud every year - with 700,000 experiencing profound suffering as a result; yet presently only 15% of victims report being defrauded either to the police or Action Fraud .

We know CPA behaviours can often include financial abuse – either through theft, coercing parents into making purchases, or taking out credit cards and other items in the parent’s name. The latter of course is fraud, and anecdotally we know that many parents affected by CPA would fall under that 85% who don’t report the incident.

That’s why we were concerned to read the report’s findings, which include:

• Fraud cases have surged by 24% during the Covid pandemic.

• Fraud has grown hugely in recent years and now accounts for 39% of all crime.

• Estimates from the Crime Survey for England and Wales (CSEW) showed there were 4.6 million fraud offences in the year ending March 2021, compared to 3 million incidents of theft and 1.6 million incidents of violent crime.

These crimes may not be officially recorded for a variety of reasons, including fear, embarrassment and intimidation, all of which are often factors when CPA is occurring – as well as parents understandably not wanting report their children to authorities for such a serious offence.

The study concluded that too many victims still receive poor service from the police and are denied justice, and that both investigation and prevention of fraud services remain under-resourced.

Currently 2% of police resources are allocated to fraud, and fewer than 8,000 prosecutions were recorded in 2019. In July 2021, the Government published its ‘ Beating Crime ’ plan and promised to replace Action Fraud with an improved national fraud and cybercrime reporting system. This may facilitate the ways to report fraud, yet the emotional impact is just as important.

The Victims’ Commissioner, Dame Vera Baird QC, said: “We know that the police response to fraud, though getting better, is still not good enough. But it’s not just the investigative response to fraud that needs attention. We need to know how well the overwhelming majority of fraud victims – who will not get a criminal justice outcome – are being supported. Most experience little to no victim are.”

Diana Fawcett, Chief Executive of the independent charity Victim Support , added: “We welcome this timely and detailed report from the Victims’ Commissioner. The publication of the Government’s fraud strategy can’t come soon enough – it needs to be bold, ambitious and backed up by significant resourcing.”

You can read the full report here .

PEGS launches national employer Covenant

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 19 Oct 2021 07:19:29 GMT

Michelle and the PEGS team are delighted to announce the launch of the Child to Parent Abuse Covenant, backed by the DWP.

Employer support for parents being abused by their children is set to be stepped up thanks to the launch of a national covenant.

PEGS has partnered with the Department for Work and Pensions to create the CPA Covenant, in a bid to ensure organisations are able to effectively support both staff and service users.

“We wanted to ensure managers and HR teams were supported to learn more about CPA, discover how it could be impacting their service users and own staff, and implement effective policies and practices which are going to truly support those affected by this issue,” she added.

The term Child to Parent Abuse covers a range of abusive and violent behaviours displayed by a child of any age (including adult offspring) towards their parent, carer or guardian. Often other family members such as siblings are impacted too, and experts believe between 3% and 10% of UK households could be affected.

CPA includes physical, financial, verbal and even sexual abuse – and often has a profound impact not only upon family life, but also the parent’s relationships, physical health, mental health and employment.

Among PEGS parents, in excess of 40% have been forced to reduce their hours or leave work altogether as a direct result of the abuse.

Michelle added: “Staff members may not feel comfortable disclosing to their employer that they are being abused by their child, especially if there’s no support structure in place. In many cases, their manager may not have even heard of CPA, and it’s even less likely that they have existing CPA-focused policies and practices.

“We’ve been training organisations such as local authorities, police forces and charities for the past 18 months so we know it’s something that managers are willing to learn more about once they realise the significance. After most sessions I lead, at least one of the professionals being trained discloses that they have been impacted by CPA, which is why it’s important that organisations look to support their own staff as well as service users.

“There are so many ways organisations can assist – such as implementing different working patterns or enabling their employees to access support services during their working day; but most of all, parents experiencing CPA simply want to be listened to and believed. A supportive atmosphere where they feel comfortable to disclose their situation makes all the difference.”

Organisations signing up to the Covenant will be able to access a free exclusive one-hour webinar with Michelle, which will cover the basics of CPA and ideas of how they can begin to implement CPA policies and practices – as well as a wealth of information and resources to help them do so.

Tony Hyland, Senior National Account Manager for the DWP, said: “The DWP is delighted to support in the promotion of the CPAC which, building on our work in establishing the Care Leaver Covenant (CLC) and the Employers Domestic Abuse Covenant (EDAC), will not only provide affect parents with practical assistance – but will also engage our National Employers and Partners in highlighting this issue and signing up to the Covenant itself, thereby working with PEGS on an ongoing basis.”

To sign up to the CPAC, simply click here .

Virtual event sees support build for CPA awareness

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 18 Oct 2021 09:25:59 GMT

The first-ever event hosted by PEGS saw almost 200 professionals come together online.

Our organisation is a not-for-profit which launched 18 months ago with the aims of supporting parents experiencing Child to Parent Abuse, training front-line professionals, raising awareness, and influencing national policy.

Founding Director Michelle John and her team invited funders, professionals and partner organisations to join Progressing PEGS, a half-day event celebrating the journey so far and looking ahead at what more could be achieved in the future.

The morning attracted 194 attendees from health bodies, police forces, charities and voluntary organisations, the civil service and many other sectors.

A mix of live speakers and recorded videos saw Domestic Abuse Commissioner Nicole Jacobs, Jess Philips - Shadow Minister for Domestic Violence and Safeguarding, John Campion – West Mercia Police and Crime Commissioner, Natalie Hancock – Mid and West Wales Regional VAWGDASV Adviser, and Ahmed Bhayat from the Department for Work and Pensions addressing attendees.

Representatives from partner organisations also spoke including those from The Isla Foundation, Community Foundation for Staffordshire, The Kintsugi Collective, isev, and Bright Star Boxing.

Michelle said: “We were thrilled to have so many participants for our first ever virtual Progressing PEGS event – but what was even more fantastic was just how engaged the attendees were. We’ve already had some amazing feedback during the event and on social media, and we’ve identified multiple organisations who we can begin to partner with, as well as strengthening the existing bonds we had with many of the groups who attended.

“The more support we have, the more parents we can support – and that’s why I set up PEGS, to ensure those impacted by Child to Parent Abuse have somewhere they can turn to, where they will be listened to, believed, and empowered.”

Child to Parent Abuse is thought to impact somewhere between 3% and 10% of UK households, with behaviours including physical, financial and verbal abuse – often resulting in parents, carers and guardians needing help from social services, the police, their GP or the child’s school.

PEGS offers free support to all parents affected by CPA (including those who have adult offspring), via advocacy, one-to-one support, confidence and coping technique programmes, and a peer support group.

You can follow PEGS' progress across social media - posts specifically about the event have been shared online using the hashtag #ProgressingPEGS.

Motivational speaker helps boost parents' confidence

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 11 Oct 2021 09:22:51 GMT

A motivational speaker has helped inspire the confidence of parents impacted by Child to Parent Abuse .

Individuals supported by PEGS were invited to attend an exclusive webinar led by Dani Wallace .

Dani, herself a survivor of domestic abuse, is considered one of the UK’s leading motivational speakers and now spends her days coaching would-be business owners on how best to launch their venture.

She reached out to numerous groups, including PEGS, to offer a session with her – something which PEGS’ Founding Director Michelle John eagerly agreed to.

Michelle said: “Having seen Dani in action before, I knew the positivity, realism and courage she brings to a session would be so beneficial for our parents , many of whom are living in situations where they are being abused physically, verbally, or financially as often as daily.

“As predicted, Dani’s session provided so many useful take-aways for the group, with advice I know they will all find useful going forward. It was extremely light-hearted and focused on confidence building, which is something many of our parents struggle with.”

Afterwards, attendees were unanimous in their positive feedback – calling Dani, ‘motivational’, ‘inspirational’ and ‘real, funny and genuine’.

Dani said: “It was a real honour to deliver a session for PEGS. It is so important to recognise all who experience domestic abuse. It truly is a genderless and generationless crime, made even more difficult when it is experienced at the hands of someone that you are supposed to protect yourself.

“Reminding these parents that they are worthy of self-love was truly a blessing.”

To find out more about Dani, simply visit www.iamthequeenbee.co.uk .

Not long until Progressing PEGS event

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 06 Oct 2021 10:32:05 GMT

It’s now only eight days to go until our inaugural Progressing PEGS event, and the team is excitedly getting final preparations underway.

This virtual half-day event will take place on Thursday 14th October between 9am-1pm and has been created to be a true celebration of all that we’ve achieved as a team since launching just under 18 months ago.

PEGS was set up by our Founder Michelle John to support parents and carers impacted by Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) as well as to train professionals working with those affected to identify and respond to this devastating form of domestic abuse. Since then, we’re

hugely proud to have supported many hundreds of families who have previously been ignored, disbelieved, and abandoned.

Our Progressing PEGS event will shine a light on all of those amazing individuals and organisations who have helped and championed us throughout this extraordinary journey, and we’ll share an insight into why there is such a vital need for the support we provide.

We have some amazing guest speakers who have very kindly agreed to be a part of this event, including Nicole Jacobs (Domestic Abuse Commissioner for England and Wales), John Campion (West Mercia Police and Crime Commissioner), and Leanne Macpherson (The Community Foundation for Staffordshire).

To register for this free event, simply click here !

New report profiles victims and suspects in family killings during Covid

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 07 Sep 2021 12:25:15 GMT

Trigger warning: this blog looks in-depth at a report covering adult family homicide cases, including profiles of victims and suspects, and risk factors. Please don’t read this blog if you feel you may be distressed by its contents

Deaths resulting from domestic abuse of all kinds have been tracked for a year during the pandemic as part of a special report .

The study was led by the National Police Chiefs’ Council and the College of Policing in association with the Vulnerability Knowledge and Practice Programme , and includes those who died as a direct result of domestic abuse or by suicide as a consequence of the abuse.

One of the categories of death which the report considers in detail is adult family homicide – which accounted for 18% of all of the cases which were looked at by the experts (intimate partner homicides accounted for 49%, suspected victim suicide 18%, child death 12% and other 3%).

There are a number of differences highlighted between the profiles of both victims and suspects in adult family homicides (which includes where the victim is the parent, grandparent, sibling or other relation of the suspect) which will hopefully support police and other organisations responsible for prevention, intervention, and prosecution where necessary.

These differences include:

Half of victims of adult family homicide were male, compared to only 15% of intimate partner homicide victims.
Victims are likely to be older when killed by a family member – 43% were aged over 65 (that age category accounted for only 18% of all cases).
Where the ethnicity of the victim was known, 24% overall were from Black, Asian and Minority Ethnic Groups compared to 30% of adult family homicide victims.
Suspects were likely to be younger in adult family homicide cases – 60% were aged 16 to 34.
At the time the cases were reviewed for the report, 63% of suspects had been charged (the overall charge rate was 43%).

The experts concluded the likely profile of a suspect in these types of cases was an adult male killing a parent, grandparent or sibling.

There are, of course, many risk factors when it comes to domestic abuse deaths – and there are many complications when considering what makes a person likely to commit this type of crime.

However, the five most prevalent risk factors across all the cases researched for the report were:

1. The suspect had been previously been abusive (44% of all cases) – this was more likely in an adult family homicide where many were known to police for family abuse and/or intimate partner abuse.

2. The suspect had a mental health condition (36% of all cases) – again this was more prevalent for adult family homicide where many suspects were known to mental health services or had previously been an inpatient at a mental health facility.

3. They had previously displayed controlling or coercive behaviour to the victim (28% of all cases).

4. Suspect was known to misuse alcohol (23% of all cases).

5. Suspect was known to misuse drugs (20% of all cases) - again this was more common for adult family homicide cases.

While the report suggests current tools such as DASH and DARA which are used to identify risks do not need to be replaced, it does highlight the need for a review to see if they are fit for purpose when it comes to adult family abuse.

Click here to see the full report.

Top 5 Learnings from PEGS Professional Training

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 19 Aug 2021 10:06:53 GMT

As many of you may know, our team regularly hosts a series of dedicated training courses for those working across the social care and education arenas, as well as police forces and other key organisations, to help them support families experiencing the devastating impact of CPA.

The aim of these sessions is to provide professionals and their wider organisations with further information on Child to Parent Abuse , to support them to recognise when CPA may be taking place, what this means for the families involved, and how they can best respond.

Our latest blog comes from a professional who recently attended one of our virtual sessions, and who shares an insight into her key learnings and takeaways…

“Coming with a degree of prior knowledge, I attended this session with the intention of wanting to increase my awareness of CPA and to broaden my understanding of how professionals working with families in any capacity can provide support to those experiencing the pain, anguish, and trauma of it.

“The three-hour intensive session covered a breadth of topics including the reasons why CPA occurs, associated risk factors, and the many barriers parents face when seeking help. As well as providing information and initiating discussion and debate, the course also highlighted real-life case studies from parents who had suffered (and continue to suffer) at the hands of their children.

“My five top takeaways from the PEGS session would be:

• The number of families seeking support due to CPA is growing exponentially, with 1,445 parents having accessed PEGS’ services since April 2021 and 22,000 calls to Parentline over a 2-year period. It’s truly shocking to know that so many families are suffering, but hugely positive that the support is out there for them (and that awareness of this is increasing UK-wide)

• Child to Parent Abuse can impact parents, carers and families in so many ways including their emotional wellbeing, mental health, physical health, employment prospects, financial security, family dynamics, and friendships. It can literally be all-encompassing

• The barriers that families experiencing CPA face are widespread – from feelings of guilt, fear of others’ reactions, and isolation, through to unconditional love for their child, not wanting the breakdown of their family, and mistrust of external agencies

• The role of PEGS as an organisation is very much to complement the work of external agencies (including social care, police, and health care) and not compete – with the team dedicated to working alongside all other professionals to ensure (as a priority) the safety and welfare of parent, child, and wider family circle

• The most important words that a professional can say to a parent that comes seeking support from CPA is ‘I believe you’.

Enlightening, informative, and at times desperately heart-breaking, this session was hugely valuable in enhancing my knowledge of CPA and it’s true impact, and I’d absolutely recommend anyone that works with families in a professional capacity to find out more.”

If you’re a professional and would like more information about the range of training PEGS offers to organisations across the UK, please email hello@pegsupport.com .

Research looks into abuse of grandparent kinship carers

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 11 Aug 2021 14:19:18 GMT

There are many different people stepping into the role of parent or guardian, and a proportion of these are grandparents who are looking after a grandchild within a kinship role (where a family member or friend is providing care). That’s the focus of a brilliant piece of research by Dr Amanda Holt and Dr Jenny Birchall, from the University of Roehampton, who interviewed kinship-carer grandparents who were sadly experiencing abuse or violence from their grandchildren.

• More than half of all kinship carers in the UK are grandparents

• The researchers spoke to 24 grandmothers and 3 grandfathers – aged between 40 and 73

• The children they were looking after were aged between 5 and 20

• They also spoke to professionals in family support services, social care, the police, education etc

The grandparents were experiencing a range of behaviour including physical, verbal and financial abuse – including being punched, kicked, bitten, headbutted, having items thrown at them, and treasured possessions destroyed.

Triggers for specific episodes could include going to new places, having contact with their parents, having access to technology restricted and the demands of the school day. But:

“The grandparents unanimously agreed that the violent and abusive behaviour they were facing ultimately stemmed from trauma and loss.”

This refers to the experiences the children had been through which had seen them end up in kinship care with their grandparents. Those interviewed felt sometimes the behaviour was the only way the children could communicate how they felt, and they targeted the person they felt the safest with – the grandparent who was offering unconditional love.

This abuse was understandably having a huge impact on the grandparents, affecting their:

• Relationship with the grandchild’s parent and other family members

• Marriage

• Finances

• Physical and mental health

There were varying experiences with professionals – contact with police was generally regarded as positive, contact with schools/colleges mixed, and there were challenges reported with getting support from children’s social care.

There are a number of recommendations made by Dr Holt and Dr Birchall, which we hope to see implemented by the services involved in supporting kinship carers. These include trauma-informed therapeutic work, tailored support for grandparents, thorough risk of harm assessments before kinship care is agreed, and continued support once the agreement is in place.

Speaking to PEGS, Dr Amanda Holt said: "This research highlights the specific challenges faced by grandparent kinship carers as they not only navigate the challenges of caring full-time for their grandchild - which includes challenges of managing contact with their grandchild's parent or parents - but also navigating the challenge of aggressive and/or abusive behaviour from their grandchild.

“Grandparent kinship carers are very much unsung heroes, and it is a travesty that this form of violence often goes unacknowledged, with insufficient support available for grandparent kinship carers in this position."

You can read the full research here .

Government consultation launches featuring hidden form of domestic abuse

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 09 Aug 2021 10:48:11 GMT

A leading campaigner has hailed the inclusion of Child to Parent Abuse in Government guidance as a ‘huge step forward’ for the often-hidden issue.

Researchers estimate between 3% and 10% of UK homes are impacted by CPA but the consultation on 3rd August sees this type of abuse specifically highlighted as part of domestic abuse legal documents for the first time.

The draft statutory guidance, which is out for consultation until 14th September, is one of the documents which will help organisations such as social care, education, criminal justice and other stakeholders implement the Domestic Abuse Act which was passed earlier this year.

Michelle John, our PEGS' Founding Director, was asked by the Home Office to contribute her expertise to the CPA section of the guidance – and says the inclusion of the definition and examples of the type of behaviour being experienced will help parents who are seeking support.

She added: “Many of our parents have struggled to access support for themselves, and having CPA included within this guidance will hopefully represent a huge step forward when it comes to services recognising this type of abuse and responding appropriately to parents who have asked for help.

“It’s only by bringing this issue out of the shadows and ensuring every professional is aware of CPA, and knows how to assist parents, carers and guardians who are experiencing abusive and violent behaviours, that we alleviate the huge burden of guilt, isolation, anxiety and shame many of our parents tell us they feel.”

Click here to read the draft guidance and have your say.

Derbyshire police commissioner funds EPIC programme

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 05 Aug 2021 20:13:30 GMT

We are thrilled to have been supported by the Derbyshire Police and Crime Commissioner .

PEGS has received £17,666 from the Commissioner to support domestic abuse services in Derby and Derbyshire.

This will help us in our work to assist parents, carers and guardians experiencing abusive or violent behaviour from their child (of any age from pre-school to adulthood and beyond).

Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) is thought to impact up to one in ten families, with behaviours including physical, emotional and financial abuse as well as coercion and control, damage to property and abuse towards siblings and pets too.

We will use the grant to run four of our tailor-made nine-week Empowering Parents in Crisis (EPIC) programmes, designed to reduce feelings of isolation, guilty and blame which the majority of their parents report experiencing.

EPIC includes information about safety and risk, trauma responses, reacting and responding, behaviour and communication, working with professionals, and the importance of self-care.

Our Founding Director Michelle John said: “A huge thank you to the Commissioner and her team for the grant – CPA is often a hidden form of domestic abuse so for the Police and Crime Commissioner to recognise it alongside intimate partner abuse is significant.

“PEGS supports hundreds of parents impacted by CPA by providing advocacy, one-to-one sessions, counselling and a closed online peer support group.

“We also train professionals such as police forces and social care teams so they can recognise the potential signs of CPA, and feel confident they know how to respond if they either suspect CPA or it’s confirmed by the parent.

“Alongside this, we are working with a number of national and regional authorities to introduce or revise their policies specifically around Child to Parent Abuse.”

Police Commissioner Angelique Foster said: “Domestic abuse in whatever form is unacceptable. I think it is everyone’s responsibility to help tackle it, to shine a spotlight on the problems and to report concerns.

“Unfortunately, this type of behaviour is under-reported. It is important that those affected seek support so that they can get the appropriate help. That’s why I’m pleased to provide funding for this project which I hope will help more people overcome the devastation caused by abuse in their own home.”

Loss expert shares insights

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 02 Aug 2021 07:41:26 GMT

In the extremely tough times that we’ve all been living in over the last 18 months, so many of us have experienced loss. Whether that’s a bereavement, financial loss, or severely reduced social contact – or a mix of all three.

We caught up with Dipti Solanki – a qualified homeopath, grief coach and life coach – as we know many of our PEGS parents are feeling the impact of these losses. Here’s what she had to say:

Can you tell us a little bit about what you do?

“I’m a grief and emotional recovery coach, so I help people to look at the type of loss they are suffering from, begin understanding the impact, and start taking very practical steps to help them heal. We tend to think of loss as bereavement but the term covers all sorts of loss.

“Often, we don’t have the information we need to deal with a loss, which can reduce our ability to heal. When healing doesn’t happen, it can lead to so many physical and emotional symptoms including anxiety and depression.

“We are often told to ‘be strong’ and essentially act as if something hasn’t happened. But loss has such a big impact, and it’s important to talk about what’s happened. I have a very structured, well-defined process to go through with the adults and children I work with, so it’s not overwhelming for them and they know the next steps within the process.”

How can we support children who’ve experienced a loss?

“Talking to children is very important, and so too is showing them the emotions that you’re feeling. Most children will say they’ve got a tummy ache if they feel anxious, because they don’t know how to articulate their feelings. As adults, we need to help them understand what an emotion is and let them know it’s okay to be sad and be in touch with their emotions. If we don’t talk about it, that’s the point at which things can escalate.”

What have you seen happening during the pandemic?

“We have all experienced collective losses: our freedom of movement, being able to see each other socially, loss of income, divorces and separations, and loss of communication. For some of us, there’s been a loss of hope. And of course, there has been so much bereavement; not being able to be with loved ones, not having the chance to say goodbye, and having a very different grieving process has been extremely hard. We have had to grieve in very artificial ways and in isolation from each other.”

What’s the biggest misconception about loss?

“The biggest lie we are told is that time heals. Grief is a very physical thing, and grief and shock can sit in the system for decades.

“We also feel we have to keep things ‘normal’ in the home when a loss or something like a separation has taken place. We just keep going and often don’t acknowledge our true feelings – but that emotional honesty with everyone in the household including children is so powerful, as is discussing how everyone feels.”

What advice would you give people about managing their emotions now restrictions have been lifted?

“Everyone has different pressures and different feelings – which can end up in a pressure cooker situation where people are feeling unsafe. In all of this, we need to manage our emotions and juggle expressing our feelings and keeping ourselves safe.

“We all need compassion and understanding because everyone feels differently about the restrictions being lifted.”

Thank you to Dipti for her valuable insight into loss. If you’d like to find out more about her work, simply visit https://diptisolanki.com/ .

Freemasons donate to support parents

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sun, 25 Jul 2021 08:25:04 GMT

We are thrilled to announce we have benefitted from the generosity of Shropshire’s Freemasons.

The Provincial Grand Lodge of Shropshire – which comprises more than 1,200 members across 36 local lodges - donated £500 to PEGS, with a further £300 gifted by the Sabrina Lodge in Shrewsbury as part of its centenary celebrations.

Allen Cadman explained that the county’s Freemasons gave on average £35,000 a year to different organisations, raised by their members as part of their commitment to their own lodge and The United Grand Lodge of England.

Michelle John, PEGS Founding Director, added: “On behalf of all of the parents, carers and guardians experiencing Child to Parent Abuse who will benefit from this donation, we would like to say a huge thank you to the Freemasons for their generosity.

“It’s fantastic to see people within Shropshire so willing to help others, and donate to organisations such as PEGS.”

Visit www.shropshiremasons.org.uk for more information about Shropshire Freemasonry.

CPA talk for university's Masters students

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 20 Jul 2021 11:07:53 GMT

Worcester students specialising in domestic abuse had the chance to hear from a leading expert as part of their course.

Michelle John - our PEGS founder - was asked to give a talk to University of Worcester students studying for a Masters in Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence .

Michelle set up PEGS after realising her own lived experience was being replicated in homes across the UK and beyond – with researchers estimating between 3% and 10% of families are impacted.

Child to Parent Abuse can take many different forms, from physical violence such as kicking, headbutting and damaging property, to financial, emotional or sexual abuse. PEGS has worked with more than 500 parents, carers and guardians who are affected, as well as training professionals such as police forces and social care teams, and influencing policy written by regional and national agencies including the Home Office.

Michelle said: “I was delighted to be ask to talk to the students, especially given the rise in CPA in recent years meaning as they continue their careers focusing on domestic abuse, they are likely to come into contact with impacted families.

“It’s really important for domestic abuse specialists to have a working understanding of CPA, and that means training existing professionals as well as those currently studying the topic.

“Thank you to Beverley Gilbert, Senior Lecturer in Violence Prevention, and the team at University of Worcester for inviting me along and enabling the students to learn about this incredibly important – and often hidden - form of domestic abuse.”

The MA Understanding Domestic and Sexual Violence has been a unique postgraduate Masters and as such has students attending from across the UK and from Europe and further afield.

Beverley Gilbert said: “Most of our students are highly experienced professionals working in a range of disciplines with a specific interest in support or prevention connected to domestic and sexual abuse. They come to the University of Worcester to attain a MA qualification in this subject area and we know that this assists them in their career progression and in helping to keep our communities safer. We were fortunate to hear what Michelle had to say about Child to Parent Abuse this term."

Future counsellors find out about CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 13 Jul 2021 08:32:59 GMT

Future counsellors were able to learn more about a hidden form of domestic abuse thanks to our Founding Director.

Michelle John gave a talk about Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) to The Foundation Degree in Counselling Theory and Practice students at Shrewsbury Colleges Group .

Michelle set up PEGS to help support parents, carers and guardians experiencing CPA – as well as training professionals, raising awareness and influencing national policy.

As part of her session, she shared information about CPA with the students and discussed supporting counselling clients experiencing abusive or violent behaviour from their children.

Michelle said: “I was delighted to have been asked to talk to the students, and to be able to share the PEGS journey so far, how we are supporting victims of abuse across the country, and our vision for the future.

“It was fantastic to be able to share further information and resources that they could access, and I hope the talk will be valuable to them as they begin their careers in counselling.

“It’s vital that counsellors understand CPA as this will allow so many more parents to talk about their experiences, and the impact abuse has had on their wellbeing. A huge thank you to Shrewsbury Colleges Group for their support in highlighting CPA.”

Genevieve Walters added: “Michelle really highlighted the importance of our words and tone as counsellors supporting clients carrying so much stigma and shame”, and one of the students said: “You have highlighted so many things that we did not know about in terms of referrals for parents”

Domestic abuse reporting doesn't reflect CPA rise

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Sun, 11 Jul 2021 10:07:06 GMT

The number of domestic abuse incidents reported has dropped in Shropshire and Telford & Wrekin where PEGS HQ is based.

However, this isn’t cause for celebration given it’s known domestic abuse has actually increased during the multiple lockdowns resulting from the Coronavirus pandemic.

More incidents and fewer reports is sad news all round, and it’s also concerning when we think about specific Child to Parent Abuse cases.

Founding Director Michelle John explains: “Child to Parent Abuse isn’t specifically categorised by all police forces so it’s not currently possible to track overall patterns in CPA reporting.

“We know CPA has always been under-reported and with the general dip in domestic abuse reporting during the pandemic, it’s a real concern that experts are having to make educated guesses about the prevalence of CPA.

“At PEGS, we’d like to see relevant incidents categorised as CPA so all police forces can look at patterns over time and respond accordingly. Of course, the other side of this is encouraging parents to disclose (either to police or to other professionals such as social care teams or their GP) so that we can get a more accurate picture of the scale of CPA. It’s believed it’s increased by around 70% over lockdown but of course we can never be entirely sure.”

There are multiple barriers to parents, carers and guardians feeling able to talk to a professional when they are experiencing CPA. That’s why PEGS not only works with families, but also with organisations such as police forces and local authorities to ensure they are trained on how to respond to CPA.

Michelle adds: “It’s only by debunking myths around CPA and ensuring professionals respond appropriately and effectively to situations that we can begin to encourage more parents to come forward and talk about their situation. We don’t want any family to feel trapped or isolated by what’s going on in their home, we need to make CPA a topic that can be discussed – and we need to ensure reported incidents are categorised to build up a better idea of exactly how many families are impacted.”

Please email hello@pegsupport.com if you're a parent who needs support, or a professional who'd like to find out more about training.

999: What's Your Emergency?

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 01 Jul 2021 18:53:07 GMT

Warning: this blog focuses on and discusses elements on a programme on CPA, with details which may be triggering. Please only read (or watch the programme) if you feel able to

This week, the popular Channel 4 emergency services programme 999: What’s Your Emergency? focused on incidents of child to parent abuse being reported to police in South Yorkshire .

Of course, we welcome CPA being given such a prominent platform and hope many more people are aware of the issue as a result of the show – although it’s sad that the issue was being highlighted in response to a large rise in incidents being reported to the police. The point was even made during the programme that reported incidents have doubled in recent years.

There are various important points which were highlighted, which we’d like professionals and the general public to keep in mind going forward:

It doesn’t matter how old the child is – one call was made in regard to a man’s son who was in his 40s, while another was about a 15-year-old. While not shown on the programme, we also know that many much-younger children are displaying violent and abusive behaviours to their family.

CPA has a severe impact on everyone in the household – viewers heard how siblings were sometimes being targeted during incidents, and the parents spoke frankly about the effects on their health and wellbeing.

Parents still love their child – we always say at PEGS it’s the behaviour the parent doesn’t want, not the child, and that was echoed by the parents who were desperate for more support for their children, and were often calling the police as a last resort and because they were scared rather than wanting their child to be punished.

We feel the distinction between teenage behaviour and CPA could have been made more clearly at points – some of the police officers and call handlers talked about the respect they had for their own parents, and teenagers causing trouble because they were bored.

However, it was clear the behaviour they went on to show (such as criminal damage and threats to kill) went far above and beyond regular teenage behaviour.

Pushing boundaries is a fairly normal part of childhood – but abusive and violent behaviour isn’t – and that’s why we need to educate the public and professionals about CPA, and the fact parents aren’t to blame for their child’s abusive behaviour (so telling them to simply discipline their child isn’t the answer).

During one incident, two police officers were originally fairly sceptical about why the mother had called the police; but after hearing how she’d been driven to the point of considering suicide after years of violent behaviour from her son, they realised just how desperate she was for support.

One of them commented: “ she must have tried numerous ways of dealing with it but normally when you call 999, it’s a last resort, and this was a last resort. ”

There is a big difference between rebelling and committing criminal offences – and sadly support isn’t always available for parents where the behaviour has escalated beyond the norm. One mother said she’d attended more than 1,000 meetings but had found it was difficult to access support, especially once her son had become an adult.

If you’re impacted by CPA, please request to join our closed Facebook peer support group , or come along to our online drop-in sessions held twice a week.

If you’re a professional who’d like to find out more about CPA, please email hello@pegsupport.com for more information about the range of training PEGS offers to organisations across the UK.

Schools includes CPA workshops in parent conference

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Mon, 14 Jun 2021 12:31:58 GMT

Parents had the chance to learn about Child to Parent Abuse as part of a week-long event.

Severndale Academy held its first SEND Virtual Conference with multiple interactive workshops each day, including sessions led by PEGS.

Founding Director Michelle John said she was thrilled to be asked to join in the event at Severndale, and to share an insight into CPA with parents.

“It’s incredibly difficult for some parents to approach others for support if they are experiencing CPA - and some may not even realise the behaviours are abusive, as society generally expects parents to ‘just get on with it’ whatever the situation is with their children.

“So, it’s fantastic to see Severndale School including CPA within their conference, and enabling us to educate attendees about Child to Parent Abuse and where they can access support.

“I hope to see more schools taking this approach and equipping parents and teachers with the knowledge they need about CPA.”

The school’s Assistant Principals Lorna Matley and Michelle Hill added: “Parents were able to book onto up to seven interactive workshops per day. The workshops were delivered by a mixture of internal and external providers offering a range of practical and informative sessions including relaxation and yoga, understanding behaviours of concern, and Makaton simple signing.

“We were thrilled to be able to include workshops from PEGS, who offered support and awareness to our families who need it most.”

For more information about Severndale, one of the largest special schools in the country, visit www.severndaleschool.org .

PEGS Founder reflects on attitudes to CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 11 Jun 2021 15:41:14 GMT

PEGS first began offering support to parents and professionals in 2020 – now more than a year on, Founding Director Michelle John has taken some time to share her thoughts and reflections on what she’s learned and the responses she’s received along the way:

I started PEGS not knowing what it was going to be, I just knew that something had to be done and a voice given to those parents, carers and guardians who were trying to survive another day in a situation where they alone and scared. Scared for themselves, scared for their family and scared for the unknown.

Living with a child who displaying abusive, violent or out of control behaviours is not easy, it is not a happy time, and it is not safe, yet all too often judgements and comments are made that blame the parents. Could you imagine the uproar if society blamed an intimate partner victim of domestic abuse for their situation? Yet the majority still find it acceptable to make judgments and/or blame a parent for their child’s behaviour towards them.

There is no worse critic for a parent than a parent themselves, they do not need to be criticised when they reach out for help and support, they need to be listened too, believed and empowered.

Day after day, I am privileged to hear parents’ experiences across the country, different families yet often similar situations. One thing that is constant across the UK is the lack of understanding, missed opportunities to keep families safe, and a failure of having policies and frameworks to assist professionals in upskilling their knowledge and providing effective care and support.

I spend a lot of my day talking to individuals and organisations about Child to Parent Abuse, I try to offer these professionals the support they need to navigate the complexity of working with families where a child is abusing their parent or carer. I will suggest other services such as Forensic CAMHS, an excellent service within England (FACTS is the Welsh equivalent) who are able to offer support for professionals and families where a child or young person with or without a diagnosis is displaying extremely violent, harmful or out of control behaviours. If you are not aware of Forensic CAMHS please ask at your health boards for details of your local service. I try to encourage multi agency working and share what tools we have here at PEGS to help those professionals understand and empower them in helping their families.

I am also challenged by some professionals on Child to Parent Abuse and that the behaviours must have been learned from somewhere, that there is no such thing, or even that the parent just needs to ‘be a parent’. I hear excuses being made for the sometimes extremely violent and aggressive incidents; I hear how parents are told they need parenting classes – do we send intimate partner victims on programmes on how to be a better partner? No, we do not, and we never would, yet for the majority of the time the response for parent and carers victims seems to be that a parenting programme is the answer.

I see professionals telling parents that they will be prosecuted for neglect or abandonment if they try to seek support for the child to live outside of the family home. Again, could you imagine anyone telling an intimate partner of abuse ‘if you ask them to leave you will be prosecuted’?! The suggestion itself seems ludicrous yet time after time the parents I work with are being told this is the case. Currently almost 20% of the parents PEGS supports have been threatened with this action by local authorities – appalling, heart-breaking and causing further distress, worry and fear.

And what happens when the ‘child ‘is 18 or over? Sadly, there is not much difference, the suggestion that it is somewhat easier as the parent can choose to ask their child to leave, to stop all communication and to make better choices are often the first comments made. Yet the reality is this is no easier when your child is over 18 than when they are under 18. Parents with adult children are seeing and hearing similar comments, they are almost left even more alone (if this is possible) than the parents with younger children.

Some of the parents we support have been experiencing decades of abusive behaviours, they are being missed by services, professionals, family, friends, and the community. The assumption that as the child is an adult so therefore its easier to find a solution is rife, the onus is still placed on the parents, especially if their child has an additional need. Again, we are seeing older parents being told that if they ask for their adult child who may have additional needs to leave, they would be placing a vulnerable adult homeless and at risk and that would potentially see them as being in the wrong. So, they are left trying to survive day after day with behaviours that they can not manage and quite frankly should not have to put up with. We all have the right to live fear free and safe in our homes, yet this does not appear to apply to parents.

We have also sadly heard of cases where a child has killed their parents, take DHR Sarah for example, her son was 16 when he killed his mum, yet she had been asking for help and support for a decade. Again, we have seen cases of where adult children have killed their parent. I am often met with shock, disgust, confusion and comments especially when the child Is under 18 of ‘well I can’t believe that, what did the parent do for their child to react that way?’ Even when a life has been lost, in cases of child to parent domestic abuse the parent is still blamed and judgments made.

I know this is a difficult and uncomfortable topic to talk about, especially for those us who have children, and it can be difficult to understand for those who haven’t experienced it themselves. Yet not experiencing something directly does not mean it is not someone else’s reality. Support put in place when parents ask for help is the way forward, and change is needed. The parents I support echo my views: many have asked for help at the start yet were ignored, blamed or sent on a programme yet when things have then escalated and the parent or even a sibling has come to harm, the parents were then blamed for not asking for help sooner and some have had their children removed for failure to protect – can anyone else see the problem here?

Image going to the doctor repeatedly to be told take over the counter mediation for you to then require urgent hospital treatment to be told you should have come to us sooner. Blame is not helpful for anyone - listening, supporting, and empowering is. You can choose how you respond when someone tells you they are experiencing these behaviours from their child, it is a privilege to be told something so painful, upsetting and deeply personal, you may be the only person they have told so you response matters in more ways than one.

For domestic abuse victims I must stress here how difficult and at times unsafe it is for them to reach out for help, they do so when they feel they are strong enough and able enough to ask for help and support, to then be told you did not ask for help soon enough is soul-destroying. Victims are already feeling punished they don’t need to feel punished by those who should be helping.

Do I know what the answer is? No, I do not, but I am sure trying to make change and to get these parents’ voices heard. I ask that you stand alongside me, PEGS, and parent victims to become part of the solution and not part of the problem.

Grant from the Kelly Family Trust

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 11 Jun 2021 15:32:38 GMT

A trust which has supported numerous causes over the last 17 years has awarded a grant to PEGS.

The Kelly Family Charitable Trust was launched in 2004 and its trustees have funded a wide range of projects, including those aimed at supporting families impacted by domestic abuse.

They have awarded £5,000 to PEGS to support us in adding an administration assistant to the team.

Founding Director Michelle John says: “We’d like to say a huge thank you to the trustees and the team at the Kelly Family Charitable Trust. Without organisations such as the Trust, PEGS wouldn’t be able to support parents, carers and guardians across the UK who are impacted by Child to Parent Abuse.”

West Mercia PCC supports PEGS

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 03 Jun 2021 10:29:53 GMT

West Mercia’s Police and Crime Commissioner has stepped in to support parents experiencing abuse from their own children.

John Campion has awarded almost £30,000 of Ministry of Justice funding to PEGS, to help us work with families impacted by physical, financial, emotional or sexual behaviour displayed by children of any age.

The grant will be used to deliver 12 Empowering Parents in Crisis (EPIC) sessions, a group programme which provides emotional and practical support for parents, carers and guardians who are living with a child displaying abusive, violent or out-of-control behaviours.

The sessions focus on behaviour and communication, safety and risk, trauma response, advocacy and working with professionals, and aim to increase confidence, empower and inform those attending.

PEGS - which also trains professionals such as social workers and police officers so they can respond appropriately to CPA, as well as raising awareness and influencing national policy – became operational in April 2020 and has already supported nearly 500 families.

Founding Director Michelle John said: “We are hugely thankful to Mr Campion and his team for their support, which will positively impact the lives of parents experiencing CPA. As well as the grant itself, the PCC’s support brings awareness to the issue, which is often left in the shadows.

“Research indicates between 3% and 10% of families are impacted but many parents report a lack of support, so we aim to provide the assistance, advocacy and listening ear they so desperately need.”

Commissioner John Campion said “Victims are at the heart of everything we do, and my commitment as Commissioner is to ensure there are many different routes in place to help people cope and recover. This investment will provide dedicated, expert support to everyone who needs help, when they need it.”

PEGS volunteer shares experience for Volunteers' Week

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Thu, 03 Jun 2021 10:21:24 GMT

This week (June 1st to 7th) is annual Volunteers’ Week , celebrating the huge numbers of people who willingly give up their time to support worthy causes.

It’s estimated almost a quarter of adults spend some of their time volunteering, and more people than ever reported helping out in their community during the Coronavirus pandemic lockdowns.

At PEGS, we are fortunate to have the support of dedicated volunteers who enable us to assist as many parents, carers and guardians experiencing CPA as possible.

To mark Volunteers’ Week, Lucia – who is responsible for the amazing content across our social media channel – has explained why she was moved to support PEGS:

“I volunteer for PEGS because I have a passion for helping those who need support because of the effects of domestic abuse. I have had experience of abuse from both my mother and a previous partner, so I personally know how difficult it is.

“As a mother myself, I also know how hard parenting is, let alone without any other complexities. As parents we already feel guilty about everything and anything (which often isn't helped by society!).

“Unlike fleeing to a refuge from partner abuse or cutting contact from a mother’s abuse, if it is abuse from your child, the lack of support is heart-breaking and the blame put on parents is not okay.

“I refuse to sit still and just accept that’s just the way it is: these parents need support. Alongside this, more awareness is needed and professionals need to be equipped with training to help them respond to CPA.

“I am so proud to be a part of the wonderful team at PEGS, helping to build up a national organisation which offers that much needed support, challenges perceptions and helps society recognise child to parent abuse.”

A huge thank you to our volunteers – and to all those across the UK who help keep our communities going!

If you’d like to find out about supporting PEGS, you can email hello@pegsupport.co.uk for more information about the opportunities available.

Scottish parents share CPA experiences

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 02 Jun 2021 08:28:02 GMT

PEGS parents shared their experiences for a BBC Scotland news piece

This week, two of the mothers we support in Scotland have bravely spoken out about the behaviours they are experiencing.

BBC journalist Katie Hunter shared a piece on the news and published a website story detailing some of the abuse experienced by ‘Karen’ and ‘Linda’ – and has also highlighted that the Scottish police do not currently record information about the number of CPA incidents reported to them.

We’d like to thank Katie and BBC Scotland for highlighting CPA: the more we talk about this issue, the more we can support parents, carers and guardians who are in need.

You can read the full story here (please be aware, it contains images and descriptions of injuries received, so could be triggering): Parents with violent children 'at breaking point‘ .

Severn Trent shares funds with community groups

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Fri, 28 May 2021 09:47:44 GMT

The PEGS team was delighted to be one of the organisations chosen to receive funding from Severn Trent .

The water company shared its £130,000 community fund across 34 groups, with £2,000 being given to PEGS.

Founding Director Michelle John explained: “The funds will be used to purchase some more computer equipment and to help us invest in the services of a fundraising bid writer to enable us to access more grants in the future.”

You can read more about the fund, including a quote from Severn Trent’s chief executive, here .

If you'd like to support PEGS, please email fundraising@pegsupport.com .

Westminster Domestic Abuse Forum to highlight CPA

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 18 May 2021 10:26:15 GMT

Our Founding Director Michelle is delighted to have been asked to contribute to a Westminster Insight Forum on Domestic Abuse happening at the end of this month (May).

As well as preparing a speech on Child to Parent Abuse – as part of a segment focused on inclusive services for ‘hidden’ or minoritised groups, Michelle will be taking part in a live Q&A on the day. She was also interviewed by the Westminster team ahead of the event – you can read the interview in full on LinkedIn .

Michelle will be speaking alongside Ippo Panteloudakis , Head of Services at Respect , and Pragna Patel , Director at Southall Black Sisters .

Among the topics will be the impact of Covid-19 – and specifically the pandemic lockdowns – on domestic abuse within different communities; how we can widen access to support and encourage reporting; tailoring services to meet the needs of different groups; and amplifying voices from minoritised or hidden groups.

The rest of the conference will also look at the implications of the recently-passed Domestic Abuse Bill, implementing the Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG) strategy, adapting services in light of Coronavirus including virtual delivery, accessing funding for domestic abuse programmes and projects, and transforming the response to domestic abuse (identifying victims, providing refuge, and co-ordinating a multi-agency response).

Michelle said: “It’s an honour to be asked to contribute to the Domestic Abuse Forum, alongside many of long-standing and incredibly impactful campaigners and DA professionals. It’s great to see our parents being recognised as a ‘hidden’ group – and hopefully my speech will bring CPA out of the shadows for the attendees of the Insight Forum.”

For more information about the conference, visit the Westminster Insight website . And do check back next month for an update on how it all went!

Bumper donation from Arnold Clark

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 12 May 2021 09:41:13 GMT

PEGS receives a grant from Arnold Clark's Community Foundation

PEGS has received a bumper grant thanks to a national car dealership.

The team at Arnold Clark has kindly given £750 to support our work in supporting families impacted by Child to Parent Abuse, training professionals, and influencing national policy.

Our Founding Director Michelle John said: “We are so thankful that the Arnold Clark team donated this money, which will be used to research and develop volunteer opportunities.

“Through developing a national volunteer base, we will be able to support more families – and once we can meet face-to-face it will enable peer support to take place across the areas where we have representation.

“Within a social enterprise like PEGS, every penny really does make a difference to the amount of support we can provide, and it was fantastic to meet some of the team at our local Shrewsbury branch of Arnold Clark on Tuesday (11th May) to personally thank them for the company’s donation.”

General Manager Qashem Miah said: ‘The Arnold Clark Community Fund is here to connect us with our local communities and we’re delighted that we were able to help PEGS with this grant. The past year has been challenging for so many of us, which is why it’s important that organisations like PEGS, that work so hard improve the lives of others, continue to get the support they need.

“We hope this grant will make a difference and it’s been a pleasure to meet members of the organisation and find out more about the vital work they do.”

Please email fundraising@pegsupport.com if you'd like to find out more about donating to PEGS.

Let’s Talk About PEGS

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Wed, 05 May 2021 16:35:56 GMT

Funding for PEGS thanks to the National Lottery

We are delighted to announce we’ve been awarded a National Lottery grant to help us raise awareness of CPA and our work supporting families and professionals.

We were successful in applying for £8,000 from the Community Fund for a project we’re calling Let’s Talk About PEGS.

With research suggesting anywhere between 3 and 10% of families are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse – and multiple Coronavirus lockdowns worsening the situation for many of them – it’s never been more crucial to get the word out.

The PEGS team has spent the past year working with more than 300 families to provide one-to-one counselling, online peer support, advocacy and advice, alongside training police forces, local authorities, charities and safeguarding leads.

Now we want to ensure we reach even more parents and help them find support while reducing the emotional impact their child’s behaviour is having on them.

While we increase communications from our end, there’s plenty you can also do to support PEGS:

Like our Facebook page , engage with posts and share with your own friends
Do the same on Instagram and Twitter
If you work for a police force, charity, local authority or any other organisation which would benefit from CPA expertise, do get in touch with us about our training options
Read the other sections of our website to get a better understanding of CPA from both a parental and professional point of view
If you're interested in donating or helping us raise funds, please email fundraising@pegsupport.com
If someone discloses that they are being abused by their child: listen, ask what you can do to help, and reassure them you that believe them. Don’t laugh, judge them, tell them it’s their fault, or let their child know what they have said (these may sound like obvious points, but sadly there are still many misconceptions about CPA and this can lead to parents feeling worse once they have spoken out).

Grateful 'Fore' Funding

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 27 Apr 2021 12:12:48 GMT

Fore funding to help us in the future...

A funding body dedicated to supporting the non-profit sector to help improve social issues has given a £28,000 grant to PEGS.

We are thrilled to announce the successful application to The Fore which will help us to put in place the structures vital to enable us to thrive, grow and support even more families who are experiencing Child to Parent Abuse.

The money will be used to ensure we are offering efficient support to our parents and the professionals who undertake our frontline training. You may have noticed our website has recently been redesigned, which was supported by the funding from The Fore as part of us developing a communications and marketing strategy.

We’ll also be using the funding to help us secure contracts for the delivery of training to even more statutory services such as police forces and local authorities over the next year.

Ensuring all of this is in place will help us as we plan for the future, and enable us to grow the amount of support we can offer to parents experiencing CPA, as well as the number of professionals we can train. The focus on communications will also highlight who PEGS are and what we do to many more people, which puts us in a much stronger position when it comes to influencing national policy (a core goal of ours which we are already beginning to achieve).

Our aim is to become the go-to organisation for all parents, professionals, and policy makers when it comes to CPA, and we’re thankful to The Fore for helping us on our journey towards that aim.

Covid report reveals impact on financial abuse

harriet@zen-communications.co.uk (Harriet Ernstsons-Evans) — Tue, 20 Apr 2021 12:45:32 GMT

A new report from SEA reveals how the Coronavirus pandemic has impacted victims of financial abuse.

The impact of the Covid-19 lockdowns has been felt right across the UK and beyond – and this is particularly true for those going through any type of domestic abuse, including Child to Parent Abuse (CPA).

We know from our own research that many of our PEGS parents have experienced financial abuse alongside other types of behaviour (physical, emotional, sexual etc). This can include:

- Stealing money or items from the parent or the home.

- Coercing them into spending money they don’t want to, or buying items they can’t afford.

- Running up credit card or other bills in the parent’s name.

- Deliberately damaging items so that they have to be replaced.

- Interrupting the parent’s job to the extent that they have to reduce their hours or quit altogether.

- Being forced to pay for their child’s alcohol/drugs use.

The team at Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA) has recently released a report showing the impact of lockdowns on those they support – and we wanted to highlight some of the key findings as we know they will sadly be very relevant for many of our families. It’s also crucial for the professionals we work alongside to have an understanding of this type of abuse.

The full report is available here and there’s also a handy summary sheet to give a real overview of the key issues for people during the Coronavirus pandemic.

Some of the statistics may only apply for those experiencing intimate partner abuse, or where the perpetrator has sole control of the household income. But other findings are absolutely relevant in homes where CPA is experienced.

From speaking to those experiencing financial abuse, SEA found that:

- In more than two fifths of cases (43%), the perpetrator had interfered with their ability to work or study.

This reflects what we found when surveying our PEGS parents – 34% of whom had reduced their working hours as a result of CPA, in addition to 22% who had left employment altogether as a direct consequence of CPA.

- As a result of the perpetrators’ actions during the pandemic, more than a third (39%) said their financial situation had ‘significantly worsened’ and another third (33%) said it had ‘slightly worsened’.

- And more than four fifths had attempted to control their money or finances during the pandemic. In most cases, this attempt had been successful.

While these findings are worrying, it’s good to see research being undertaken so that more can be understood about what’s going on in homes where all types of domestic abuse – including CPA – is happening. The more we know, the more organisations such as SEA, PEGS and many others can support parents and train professionals.

If you're a parent experiencing financial or any other type of Child to Parent Abuse, find out how we can help you here . Or for more information about our professional training, click here .

Abuse Campaigner Receives High Sheriff Award

Thu, 25 Mar 2021 12:20:20 GMT

A leading campaigner raising awareness about a hidden form of domestic abuse has been honoured by the High Sheriff of Shropshire.

Michelle John founded PEGS a year ago, in order to support parents being abused by their own children, and she already has a network of hundreds of families who receive mentoring, training, and peer support. Michelle also trains professionals including social services teams, police forces, and local authorities about the signs of Child to Parent Abuse (CPA) and how to effectively help families where it has been identified or is suspected.

She is now one of the leading voices in the UK on the issue, and has been called upon to help support the Home Office in implementing more effective national policies. Michelle is one of the people who has been chosen to receive an award from Dean Harris, this year’s High Sheriff of Shropshire, who personally thanked her during a virtual ceremony on Friday (12th March).

Dean said: “Domestic abuse is one of my key causes for the year – and I wanted to ensure that incorporated all forms of abuse, including CPA. The work Michelle is doing is making a phenomenal difference to families in Shropshire and right across the UK, and the training she is leading will help thousands more. It’s important that we highlight CPA as up to one in ten families are thought to experience it. Michelle’s passion and commitment to supporting people experiencing CPA, as well as educating professionals, makes her a very worthy recipient of one of my High Sheriff Awards.”

Michelle said she was thrilled to receive the award, and thankful for the support from Dean during her shrieval year.

“Dean has been incredibly supportive, and our thanks go to her for including CPA within the awareness-raising work she’s been doing this year. Making a difference to families impacted by CPA is more than enough reward for the time and effort I have invested into PEGS, but to receive recognition like this is just fantastic.”

If you’re a parent seeking support, or a professional wanting to find out more about training, please email hello@pegsupport.com.

Families Experiencing Child to Parent Abuse Benefit From Comic Relief Fund

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 14:27:46 GMT

A Shropshire service aimed at helping families impacted by Child to Parent Abuse has been awarded a £4,000 grant from the Comic Relief Community Fund.

Parent Education Growth Support (PEGS) has been given the money to enhance its online training and support service for parents, carers and guardians, as well as to continue raising awareness of the commonly misunderstood form of family abuse.

PEGS Founding Director Michelle John said: “We’re over the moon to have been awarded this grant as we can use it to help us provide vital support to even more families across the UK who are struggling with Child to Parent Abuse.

“It’s a mostly hidden, misunderstood, and stigmatised form of family violence, leaving many parents feeling isolated and shamed, and unaware that there is support available. Not only can abuse have a detrimental impact on mental and physical wellbeing, but it can also negatively impact employment and education, can see families torn apart, and escalate into the social care and criminal justice system.

“Our recent survey of parents showed an overwhelming 86 per cent did not feel that there was specific support for parent to child abuse, which is why I founded PEGS in 2019. As an intimate partner abuse victim, there are options to flee to safety at refuges, but with children displaying abusive behaviours, this is not an option.

“We’re proud to be available to professionals who require specific support for families, and we’ve become even more vital a service due to COVID-19 and children spending more time at home. Thank you to the Comic Relief Community Fund (England) for recognising the very real impact that we’re having on families across the UK, and for their support of our work in the future.”

The Comic Relief Community Fund (England) is administered by the national community charity, Groundwork.

Graham Duxbury, national CEO of Groundwork, said: “Comic Relief Community Fund (England) contributes funds to community projects being delivered by grassroots organisations and we’re delighted to support this project. The diversity of projects that are being funded shows that local communities have a passion to create something great in their area.”

To find out more about PEGs, please visit PEGS online or to learn more about the Comic Relief Fund (England) please visit the Comic Relief Community Fund (England) please visit https://www.groundwork.org.uk/national-grants/comic-relief-community-grants/ .

Abuse App Idea Generates a Business Competition Win for Shropshire Sixth Formers

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 14:27:46 GMT

Entrepreneurial pupils from a Wem school have reached the final of a national competition by highlighting a little-known form of abuse. The Sixth Form team from Thomas Adams School took part in Drapers’ Den – a Dragons’ Den style business competition run by The Drapers’ Company. The team was matched with a mentor from the company and another from the Guild of Entrepreneurs and tasked with designing a product or service which could be commercially successful and would generate a material social benefit, before pitching for up to £500,000 from a team of investors.

Business Studies teacher Amy Glover said the team recognised the rise of domestic violence during lockdown, and wanted to highlight Child to Parent Abuse in particular. “The team wanted to help raise awareness of this issue and offer an idea to help create a support network for parents. They developed a hidden app which would help victims to network with others, as well as providing tips on how to de-escalate situations and document events.”

The judges were particularly delighted with the team’s presentation and their logo, which one judge said was the best they had ever seen – including within actual businesses. After impressing the judges and winning their semi-final, the team was given £1,000 to donate to an organisation of their choice. Because of the link to their app, they chose PEGS – a Shropshire not-for-profit which raises awareness of CPA, supports families experiencing it, and trains professionals who come into contact with those families.

PEGS Founding Director Michelle John said: “We are extremely grateful to the Thomas Adams team for their generous donation, and we’re also hugely impressed they chose to design a service specifically for parents experiencing CPA.

“We have lots of work to do to ensure CPA is highlighted, as it’s currently quite a hidden form of domestic abuse, but it’s heartening to know we have incredible young people like Maya, Oliver, Holly, Will, Ryan and Charlie helping to raise awareness. Well done to you all, and we can’t wait to hear how you get on in the final.”

The team, which included Maya Balachandran, Oliver Cooper, Will Evans, Ryan Greaves and Charlie Taylor (all aged 17), and Holly Eccleston (aged 18), will now take part in the grand final to be held in May.

Frontline Virtual Coffee Break for Social Workers Features Child to Parent Abuse Expert

Fri, 19 Mar 2021 14:27:46 GMT

Child to Parent Abuse was the topic of social work charity Frontline’s most recent virtual coffee break event, featuring a leading campaigner.

Michelle John founded the charity PEGS after her own experience of CPA and now works tirelessly to train professionals about the subject, and support parents, carers and guardians who are affected. She was asked to give a presentation for the social work charity Frontline as part of its virtual Coffee Break series. Frontline creates social change for disadvantaged children through great social work practice and leadership.

As well as finding out more about CPA, those attending were able to ask questions of Michelle during the session – which was very well attended. A recording will also be available through Frontline for social workers who weren’t able to attend the live session. Michelle said: “It was fantastic to see so many people attending and asking questions – traditionally, some families experiencing CPA have struggled to access support from their local services, but we truly believe the tide is turning as so many more professionals are now becoming alert to what CPA is, how they can spot the signs, and how they can help families in need. By speaking at events, and hosting training for lots of organisations including social care teams, it means many more professionals will be equipped to deal with the challenge of support CPA families. This support is desperately needed for parents who often feel isolated, guilty and fearful.”

For more information about PEGS’ professional training and parental support, simply email hello@pegsupport.com or find them on social media (Search PEGS – Child to Parent Abuse support on Facebook, or @pegs_support on Instagram).

PEGS Blog

Service Shoutout: Chapter One

Service Shoutout: Chapter One

National Stalking Awareness Week: What We See at PEGS

National Stalking Awareness Week: What We See at PEGS

PEGS Is Growing - We Need Passionate Volunteers!

PEGS Is Growing - We Need Passionate Volunteers!

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Service Manager

A Day in the Life of a Service Manager at PEGS

Support for Armed Forces community experiencing Child to Parent Abuse

Service Shoutout: A Better Tomorrow

Service Shoutout: A Better Tomorrow ﻿

When Things Get Broken: Property Damage and Child to Parent Abuse

It’s rarely about the object

The impact most people don’t see

Why it gets minimised

What might help

6 Years of supporting parental figures

Six Years of PEGS: Reflection, Growth and Looking Ahead

Allen Lane Foundation Supports New Workshop Lead Role to Expand Support for Parents

Expanding Online Workshops and 1:1 Support

Measuring Impact

Child to Parent Abuse and Financial Abuse

New Workshop: Understanding Financial Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

What does the workshop cover?

How it’s delivered

Why this workshop matters

1 in 5 mothers killed by their sons

Hidden Family Abuse: 1 in 5 Mothers Killed by Sons in the Past Year Highlights Child-to-Parent Abuse

Child to Parent Abuse Poem

When Words Become a Voice: Michelle’s Poem Recognised in Survivor Initiative

From a Personal Moment to a Wider Audience

A Gathering of Survivor Voices

Michelle’s Poem

Michelle’s Reflection;

A Day In The Life At PEGS: HR

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Human Resources

Employee Appreciation Day

Our Founding Director thanks the PEGS team

International Women’s Day 2026

Celebrating International Women’s Day 2026.

March at PEGS

March at PEGS

Understanding Pet Abuse in CPA

Understanding Pet Abuse in CPA

The Impact on Parents and Families

"I’m constantly on edge, afraid to leave my son alone with our dog in case something happens. I feel on edge all the time"

Service Shoutout - Loop Safeguarding

Service Shoutout - Loop Safeguarding

I’ve become an Orange Button Holder - Grace CPA Practitioner

I’ve become an Orange Button Holder - Grace CPA Practitioner

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Social Media

A Day in the Life at PEGS: Social Media

Tackling Domestic Abuse in Shropshire

Tackling Domestic Abuse in Shropshire:

PEGS Turns 6 - Come and Celebrate With Us

PEGS Turns 6 - Come and Celebrate With Us!

Looking After Our Wellbeing: Parent Mental Health Day

Parent Mental Health Day

A reminder from the team at PEGS

Sibling Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

Sibling Abuse within Child to Parent Abuse (CPA)

The hidden impact on families

Service Shoutout: Staffordshire Women’s Aid

Service Shoutout: Staffordshire Women’s Aid

Who is Staffordshire Women’s Aid?

Supporting professionals and strengthening responses

Zoom: A Simple Guide to Accessing PEGS Sessions

Getting Started with Zoom: A Simple Guide to Accessing PEGS Sessions

The grief we don’t talk about: when parenting comes at a distance

The grief we don’t talk about: when parenting comes at a distance

Invisible No More: Reframing How We Listen, Support and Respond to Older Survivors of Sexual Violence and Abuse

Invisible No More: Reframing How We Listen, Support and Respond to Older Survivors of Sexual Violence and Abuse

Why This Matters

Spotlight: Abuse by Adult Children - An Overlooked Issue

A Human-Centred Lens

From Awareness to Action

Thriving With ADHD in a Supportive Workplace

Working for PEGS as a CPA Practitioner: Thriving With ADHD in a Supportive Workplace

January Schedule, The Start of 2026

Service Shoutout: A Better Tomorrow